I’m in community college for my bachelors and working 5 days a week at a minimum wage job. I constantly have to tell people I’m too busy. Too busy to come to their houses for GOT, too busy to visit with my grandma. I’m too busy to go to my boyfriends parents house and have dinner. You get the idea.

Basically I’m either: - getting ready for work (shower+makeup+outfit+driving there=2 hours prior to my shift)

What I don’t get is, how are adults who work full time able to have full on lives with unique hobbies when I can’t even find time to visit my grandma for a day? I feel like it’s just a given in the US that everyone is gritty enough to work 40 hours AND clean the house AND have a social life AND have a bunch of side hobbies that dictate your personality. Nobody ever questions it.

Even people who don’t go to school, it’s like you only have 48 hours each week (Saturday and Sunday) to actually do what you want, and most people need time to clean and to relax and recharge before working the next week, right? Does everybody just go, go, go, go, all the time, never stopping to breathe?

I thought I would have more freedom and downtime as an adult...

Edit: thank you kind anon for the silveršŸ™šŸ½

Comments (1702)

Honestly I've also been thinking about this for a while. It's so crazy that people wake up go to work come back with little time to do anything. And then have to wake up the next day to do it all again. I've started to get bored of this whole routine of working and school everyday and idk what to do.

It gets even worse if you have a typical office job where you only have about 20 hours of work per week, but are obligated to stay there for 40 hours a week. Just sitting at a desk thinking, "I could leave right now and it would probably take 2 days for anybody to notice."

Me rn. I work about 2 hours every day but have to stay and sit here for 8 hours. Sounds nice but actually really isn't.

I had a coworker who had very little work to do. She wrote 2 books and learned how to knit during her year in that position. We do have a very relaxed boss who understood she had very little to do though and didn't care that she found other things to occupy her time though.

She left after a year because she was tired of being bored all the time. She now has a very demanding position and is busy all the time and loves it.

Wow — what kind of job is that?

I'd kill for that kind of position!

[deleted]

God I wish I could get paid to do nothing. Tons of free time to work on my own shit, and getting paid to do it with a boss that approves so I don't even need to be watching over my shoulder? Goddamn dude XD

2 books in one year? She'd make Stephen King blush

Yeah, on the surface, it sounds super great. But then you get there and realize you're wasting your life for absolutely no reason other than getting paid and it's just an awful experience.

Only if you're actually wasting your time. If you're playing games or hanging on social media sure you're wasting your life. If you're using the time productively to reach your real career goals then it's awesome.

Better than working minimum wage and having to constantly work for 8 and a half hours for 8 hours of "pay"

And if you somehow finish all your work, you get to do others. Great incentive to work hard.

I started taking online classes to get out of said boring predicament. It’s like getting paid to go to college.

At least you're not destroying your body daily doing manual labor hoping today is the day you have the courage to waltz on to the i-15 during rush hour

Want to trade?

Its not a competition about whos life is worse, its about wishing life were better.

I'm just saying to this guy it could be worse, and it will be honestly

amen brother im 25 and i already have every day knee pain ill take sitting in an ac office any day

Start a side business and work on it during your 6h of ā€œfree timeā€

Brows r/beermoney and maybe you can also make some cash while you’re not doing anything

Thanks for the suggestions! I actually have my Master thesis to write so this is a great opportunity for me to get paid doing something useful on the side, I just lack motivation and concentration - I still have to answer the phone every once in a while and there are people walking in and out of the office (that’s why it’s hard to do anything that requires listening or concentrated thinking etc).

Of course it’s better than ruining your health by doing heavy lifting and other physical work but I went to college for 6 years and it kinda feels like I have so much more potential. I just wish I had a job where I would do normal amount of work and get a normal pay check contrary to now when I do zero work and basically minimum wage. (I am planning on doing something about it - my contract expires soon and I will be looking for another job!)

It becomes nightmare when you works on conveyor, like me. I make frying pans. Every fucking sinle 10 seconds... 12 years... There is no other job here... I really dont know when it finishes? When I die? Greetings from Russia.

Uuf not nice indeed! And another country?

Looking for ways to move to some scandinavia country.

Use this time to meal plan, make grocery lists, plan your day, week whatever.

It doesn't take 20-30 hours a week to make a meal plan or grocery lists.

Plan my day: Leave work at 5, work out, go home, eat dinner, go to bed.

Plan my week: Go to work.

God damn, this is me right now. Working in a bank with absolutely no work to do on a Friday. And I'm stuck here from 8-5. What a waste.

Read.

Internet.

Music.

Some of us don't get the luxury of "wasting" a bunch of hours a day. Don't squander it staring at a wall.

Imagine not getting called out for browsing the internet at work šŸ˜‚

Yeah like I get manual labor is rough but some people are making it seem like you can run a seperate business in office. Yeah ok

I was in this situation, running a business while doing a light office job. You’d think it’d be easy but the problem is you only get to do a fraction of a task at a time. Even though you might not have a ton of work, you can’t focus on a real task because then suddenly the phone rings, scan this, email this guy back.

And this is an office where no ones watching what I do and my boss wasn’t even there a lot. Can’t imagine this at a mid-size office.

I have an office job that gives me about 50-60 hours of work per week. As I am on Reddit now, I will be making up this time elsewhere, most likely cut away from my leisure, personal growth, and time with loves ones.

THIS!!! I wish you were able to go to a job, get your daily tasks done and leave if you wanted. I think it needs to be the norm for office jobs to get paid salary, and once your duties are done, people should get the option to leave.

Better than being an infantryman and only having 12 hours to finish in a 50 hour work week

Other side of that coin is being salaried, and expected to work 50+ hours a week with no overtime.

Wasn't always the case, my dad was working in computers back in the 80s he said they'd work crazy hours finishing up a big project and once it was done they'd basically do half days and take mondays fridays off, they were all salary, and thier boss wasn't at all concerned with the number of hours they worked, just that the job got done, so the 20%b of the time doing 80% of the job and 80% of the time doing 20% of the job ratio was fine.

It's better than having 100 hours of work to do and only 40-50 hours to do it in.

Enjoy your part time effort work while you can. Use that extra time to improve yourself and learn new things on your employers dime. It will pay off later when you don't have the time for self improvement.

Side hustle! Use that time to learn a skill you can shill online and make money while you make money!

What are these jobs? Every job I've had tries to cram 50 hours of work into a 40 hour shift.

Office jobs for large engineering companies, typically. I've been working as a grad student and have the same situation as you, and it's infinitely better than showing up to an office to stare at a wall. It sounds great, but it's pretty awful.

I can totally get how awful that would be. Just trying to find that happy medium I guess.

Working only 40 hrs a week would be a blessing.

Please give me a job that only requires 20 hours of work. I'm supposed to fit 12 hours into an 8 hours day, and squeeze that around meetings.

I currently work in a situation like that (grad student), and it's infinitely more rewarding than going to an office to stare at a wall.

Sounds like you should pursue a more fulfilling career.

That’s how I felt!! That’s why I’m glad I started my own business. I only do as much as needs to get done.

That’s why I’m so not looking forward to finishing school and just working for the rest of my life. At least school keeps it interesting, something different happens every day.

Get a job, that offers a variation in days. Looking at spreadshits all day in the office, gets boring really, find something you actually enjoy doing, and it will make you smile everyday you go to work and be happy when you wake up.

Edit: I wrote further down I love spreadshits and office work, I work in logistics and management, I really love my job, and wouldn't trade it for anything else, I have had different careers during my 16 years on the job market.

spreadshits

giggle

Very intended yes.. am office slave, does have several spreadshits, but I do love it though, I love data and analysis of such.

I work in the design field and I lovvvve making spreadsheets. Idk why, but whenever I get the chance it’s so satisfying for me.

What sort of design field do you work in? Fashion design, game design, architectural design etc.

I was in a studio primarily focused on branding for awhile, but I’ve just recently moved over to ui/ux about a year and a half ago.

Yeah I’m a designer as well and spent a year doing business admin part time as a change of pace.

Very soothing. Boring as fuck some days, but I kinda enjoyed that... Just punched the numbers into the sheets/entered orders/whatever and listened to podcasts and didn’t have to be so constantly intensely engaged. When I left for the day, I wasn’t thinking about the work at all. If I stayed late it was to help a coworker get stuff done, not because of some demanding client or because my project manager over scheduled me.

It’s so nice right? Idk how to describe it, it’s not like turning your brain off, but kind of nice to know ā€œthis is correct, and I can easily fact check itā€ rather than the sometime vague answers of design.

YES.

I barely even get to just apply established branding to anything anymore... Always new projects, initial concept and design phases... Which, don’t get me wrong, is fun and part of why this field appealed to me.

But goddamn. The constant, unrelenting uncertainty is draining.

Yeah, that used to kill me. What helped me a lot was having super tight moodboard around a concept and taking the client all through the conceptual parts before we touched sketches, then it’s an approved idea that just needs execution. Ux strategy has a bunch of great strategies that can really help with branding concepts if you’re ever interested in that sort of thing.

The whole ā€˜being a corporate drone is soul destroying, wake up sheeple’ is pointless propaganda just as much as ā€˜get a good job and a mortgage’ is.

Just do what you love and makes you happy.

If that’s getting a 9 to 5 as an accountant so you can go home to your family and read your children bedtime stories, do that. If it’s moving to Nepal and become a hermit up some picturesque mountain peak, do that instead.

I quit small firm lawyering to take a sales position at a multinational corporation. It's not as constantly stimulating as a law job, but it pays the bills and I don't have to take work home with me.

I look at spreadsheets and smile-and-dial all day, but the continuous improvement programs keep it from ever getting truly boring. And when I walk out the door at 5:30, my time is mine.

There are lots of different ways to be happy at work.

Weird I quit small firm lawyering to be a Nepali mountain hermit. Couldn't quite give up wifi though.

Wait so you just live in your monk's basement and play on the internet all day?

His monk hates this guy

But some people can’t just ā€œdo what they love.ā€ Some people love music, and it’s hard to make a career out of that without having connections. Some people like photography but it’s hard to make a living off that. I understand that some people love science and math, but what about the people that don’t? People that love art have no choice but to become an office slave and be miserable for the rest of their lives

I’m not sure how you think your point somehow contradicts mine. I never mentioned feasibility, I only talked about social pressures and inherent vs perceived value of a job.

My point was that no job is ā€˜soul destroying’ per se. It’s all relative to one’s interests and priorities.

If you love art but are doing corporate work (regardless of the reason why), you’re not doing what you love, so of course you will be miserable. That doesn’t mean that a corporate job is inherently bad, though.

Poster before you missed the point of "do what you love"...

Love music, too shitty to make a career out of it performing, apply to work at a musical instrument store. Look for work at an events company rigging PA systems and lighting, get a free music concert, every day you work.

Love painting, too crappy to exhibit, apply for work at the Art Musuem's Cafe, make connections with the curator, get a job for rigging and derigging art installations - network with artists.

Love acting, too shitty to be on stage, become a stage hand, light operator, prop maker, anything in theatre...

Basically what I understand from "do what you love" is work in the field that piques your interest, start at the bottom, pay your dues and make your way up the ladder.

I've met people who turned their passion into a career/job and it ended up making them hate it. I had experience with it myself as well. When you do what you love in your free time you are completely in control of how long you're doing it, when you do it and how you do it, but when you make it your job you lose that control because you're now at the mercy of your boss/clients/whomever. IMO it's better to make a mild interest of yours a job and keep your true loves separate from your career.

Works for some. I literally am qualified with a degree to do what I love, every single day.

Sure I hate my job some days, other days I love it immensely.

I'd rather do what I love, than be a cashier or sales rep, because then I would hate my job, every single day.

This is valid. It’s not the same for everyone, and it definitely depends on the thing you love, and what it is about it that you love.

All jobs get boring and have some level of drudgery involved, so I can see how your favorite thing can stop being your favorite when it becomes ā€œworkā€ and your means for survival.

Yeah that’s why I went to uni instead of art school and it’s a struggle every day but at least I can afford a pretty good lifestyle. I worry every day about my retirement because I live in one of the most severely unaffordable housing markets in the world but I’d be on the breadline even if I was a proficient artist right now. Being a mediocre office worker will always pay better and provide me at least with some measure of financial security.

Yeah you got it exactly right!

In any career in the arts, how good you are is only the beginning. Connections and the ability/willingness to move to a large city and wait tables all night/day are bigger factors.

Basically what I understand from "do what you love" is work in the field that piques your interest, start at the bottom, pay your dues and make your way up the ladder.

The top of the ladder for all but a lucky view is a day job you hate, while teaching private classes and/or playing bar gigs in a covers band/appearing in local dinner theater/selling pencil sketches of people's dogs and babies.

Working full time in a senior position in both the film and television space, having started from the bottom, as an intern, I agree that it does depend on who you know and networking very well, and that it does depend on your skill set, knowledge, creativity and most importantly your work ethic - that's what builds your reputation.

However, being aware of all your limitations is something that needs to be considered, if you are not skilled enough or talented enough to fill up Albert Hall on any night of the week, take a job behind the mixing desk, or at least work your way into that position.

I have my other passions that fill up my free time, and there's a lot of them and not enough free time. I could most likely turn 2 out of those into a fully fledged career and the rest I would be horrible at.

It's noble to make a career out of a passion, the thing though that stops most people, is that they don't put in the hours to develop their skillset and work on ways to enhance their creativity. Talent needs to be there and work ethic, and then you're all set, with the right connections being made.

That assumes there is a wide enough job market to make that an option though, or that you have the freedom to take a job with less-than-optimal pay of hours just because it will make them happier.

My city has food service, hospital work, call centers, some retail, and manufacturing. There is virtually no entertainment industry, the only art gallery of any kind closed down, wages are invariably awful, and many people are forced into whatever job they can take because they have to be able to afford to live and eat. Most people I talk to feel trapped here because it's too expensive to even move away.

Your sentiment is great, and might work in a bigger city, or without much for financial or familial obligation, but it isn't a real, viable option for everyone.

I hear you, but me being in a third world country, with strikingly high rates of poverty, where 30 million people live below the national poverty line; it definitely hasn't stopped many potential creatives and people who want to dabble with the arts, pickup only their worldly possessions and try make it in the big time - there are quite a few success stories, and then there are the behind the scenes guys who make this happen who all have the same backstory.

They come from rural villages, having lived in a hut for most of their lives, walking to school, getting their only meal of the day there, coming home and herding livestock for the rest of the day, and maybe getting a meal that night if one of the family members with a job sends some money, or a government grant paid out.

Why do so many of these people I have met in my industry with this similar backstory always succeed? They just took a chance and risk for something potentially better than they currently have, learnt as much as they could on the job and had/have immense pressure to succeed to carry on supporting their families and communities back in the village.

Maybe in a first world country money is an obstacle for chasing your dreams, but I know many guys and gals that would give you a counter argument of that not stopping them, some sleeping on the streets, others in homeless shelters, some busking on the streets to make money and ending up with regular gigs in a bar, some hanging around sets just asking questions, later on being a cable basher, and then a grip. It's determination and sacrifice.

I agree that money and relocation, to remain in a comfortable living position or comfort zone is a serious drawback and obstacle, but for some I have seen that doesn't get in the way.

No risk, no reward.

My point is that if you have health issues, or children, or family members who depend on you financially to actually survive, living homeless or in absolute poverty can be a non-option, or even a death sentence. You can make that choice for your self, but in many people's situations, the ramifications it has on others around them are prohibiting.

If you are already living in poverty, uncertain of where your next meal is coming from, then risking living homeless in poverty and not knowing where your next meal is coming from for the sake of a dream is, well, not much risk at all. If you have people who depend on you, risking that is kind of a big deal.

Very fair point my good sir/madam.

Basically what I understand from "do what you love" is work in the field that piques your interest, start at the bottom, pay your dues and make your way up the ladder.

This may be a practical, realistic interpretation of "do what you love," but it's not the common interpretation in my experience. That would be something more akin to, "Do what you would do for free, but find someone to pay you for it." This is maybe the worst pop psychology advice ever invented, along with "never go to bed angry."

I don't know if you're agreeing or disagreeing with me?

But yeah I think pop psychology is bullshit because it's not realistic. The one that kinda pisses me off is how people say you shouldn't have everything figured out in your 20's, drop that responsibility and go travel for the next 2 - 5 years across Europe. Completely fucking up your CV with gaps in employment and absolutely earning no experience in your career field of choice, setting you back 15 years.

What would make sense from a realistic and ideal point of view is if you live in a country that gives you paid vacation days as a set number and it's not frowned upon to take them and actually encouraged to take them(unlike what I hear happens in the USA) then financial management and planning skills can come into effect to hit a double whammy of working a career and travelling during your vacation. I know it can't really happen in the USA but I feel some young people take the Christopher McCandless to Alexander Supertramp transition route and really screw their future up if they aren't a trust fund child. I have seen this happen to a few friends and aquantices where they had a college fund to study pretty much anywhere and anything, but opted to use that money to travel, and now they wait tables or are barmen where they could have been Engineers, Doctor's or Lawyers by now, but instead they are scraping by. It's kind of sad hearing them complain, but they did it to themselves.

I was agreeing with you, but pointing out that your understanding of, "do what you love" doesn't align with what a lot of people seem to think that phrase means.

But 80 percent of jobs are either sitting behind a cash register, packing the shelves, calling people desperately trying to make sales or a complicated and stressful ā€˜ professional job’ that requires constant dedication. Also there are a lot of hungry people in the world with no Job.

I worked in a machine shop.

After a year of being sent out to refit factories where the rest of the 5 man team did very little work because I was in my early 20's and they were all over the age of 55. If someone on the shop floor wanted my attention they would yell BITCH and not adress me any other way.

It taught me some of my limits and good skills, but some jobs you're better off not working.

Yes you may not always be able to turn your passion into a job. But that doesn't mean that you can't still work a job you enjoy. You don't have to give up one for the other, you can still love music and work an office job and still enjoy doing both.

I found a career that pays enough to live on, and it's one that I love. For me, cosmetology was a good way to combine art and working with people in a way that makes me happy. Even thought it's not always fun, I don't dread going to work each day. For an artistic person, it isnt necessarily easy to find a job you'll like. I do realize this. But its not impossible if you look at everything with an open mind.

that person has probably never gone a day hungry in their life, they have no clue what it's like

One of my high school friends was able to buy a house at 22 with the money she made in photography.

It’s not just about something you ā€œlike,ā€ it’s about the thing you like and can handle what it takes to monetize it.

It’s not hard to make a career out of music, unless you are only trying to be a recording artist and make obscene amounts of money. If you’re proficient, you can teach lessons and play gigs and make a perfectly fine living.

I don’t even understand the having connections thing. Every single way to make money requires you to have connections. Most people aren’t exactly born with these connections. You meet other people doing things related to what you enjoy, and you start to make your own connections.

A friend of mine who loves art is a creative writing instructor and actually started her own nonprofit theatre organization.

Another friend is a professional jewelry maker.

A friend who loves books became a librarian and became a specialist in one particular area.

Another friend is a novelist, but he also supports himself by having climbed the ladder at a local company. He’s not a slave. The money he makes there supports his family and the rest of his pursuits.

Another friend is an actor who works in commercials and small films. He does fine.

If you love art, you have to learn more about both what you love about it and how money is made in the art you love. You don’t have to be an artist by trade to be surrounded by art and able to have the flexibility to practice it yourself.

It’s just not true that artists are doomed to be corporate slaves.

This is really inspiring. Thank you. However, it’s also hard when you have family that don’t really understand. I have immigrant parents that had to work hard to get here and once they did, it was non stop labor. So naturally, they saw college and office jobs as the only way to get out of that. They don’t see art as a way to make money because back in their country, there wasn’t much opportunity in that.

Again, thank you for this, it’s really inspiring. I’m graduating hs in a couple weeks and I still have no idea what to do with my life and I’m really scared. I feel like I’m doomed to end up like most people, someone with a 9-5 that makes my life miserable. I see art as a way to escape that but I still don’t know if I should pursue it

Warning, super long stuff. Sorry!

People tend to forget that you can make a fine living doing all sorts of things. I’m in my late 30s, and if I knew then what I know now, I would have become an electrician or a plumber, or gone into some other trade. Maybe it wouldn’t have been for me, But I definitely have a different view of those jobs as an adult.
So many of the more specialty areas Are a dying skill and highly valued. That stuff was looked down on when I was graduating, but they are the ones making bank right now. I have a bachelor’s degree in an area that was interesting but just checked off the ā€œcollege educationā€ box on the temp job applications I filled out after graduation.

The guy that took a tree out of my yard started trimming trees on his own at 15 and just never stopped. He has a crew and his own business and literally sets his own hours. He has more jobs than he can ever do, so he’s not hurting at all and enjoys it.

I guess what I’m saying is that there are endless ways to do life, and no one seems to fully explain that when you are first starting out.

Whatever you do, do everything in your power not to go into debt. There’s nothing wrong with doing things slower, or spending two or three years doing grunt work (yes, even in a cubicle) to give yourself a foundation. Learn to support yourself and budget as quickly as possible. Make a game of living as lean as possible and put a little of each paycheck somewhere you can’t get to it.

I was in such a rush at 22 to have the life my early millennial friends and our gen x older siblings were told we should have, I just could not see how long life really is. Don’t rush into the ā€œhouse, the car, the spouse, and the Pinterest-pretty life.ā€

Have adventures and make mistakes.

Oh! Another friend of mine spent most of his time after high school just working in restaurants in interesting places and spending a lot of time outdoors. He just graduated college a couple years ago, bought a car and went on a solo cross-country road trip before getting a job. He’s in a job in tech that he really enjoys now, and he has all that experience surviving to fall back on if times get tough.

I’m glad this is inspiring you. I’m actually kind of inspiring myself now!

Enjoy your life, take opportunities even if you’re uncertain about if you can hack it. Failure actually IS an option, and it will take you places you can’t even imagine right now. Ask people who work with the kind of art that interests you what it’s like and don’t worry about proving yourself, just learn and you’ll figure out if it’s right for you.

Okay, I’m shutting up now. So long, and thanks for all the fish!

I hear ya, Watercolor is what I’m trying to eke out a couple hours a week in now around an average wage 9-5 job, a sad relationship and a limited social life, and it’s painfully slow going on all fronts because I just don’t have the time or the energy to fully engage in at any of it.

The point is to find a job that allows you to pursue that stuff as well. It's the whole concept of leisure time. You get a job and work, get paid enough to live and then in a perfect world have benefits and such. And then work your 40-50 hours and spend all the rest of your time pursuing whatever you want. I'm not the biggest fan of my job but it's the only one I need and I can do anything else on the side that I could want and maybe eventually move on

Agreed except one point. Every accountant I know works longer hours than 9-5, especially at month, quarter and year end. They get paid well, but that’s just part of life.

I am an accountant and I can tell you your experience is not representative of everyone else’s. It depends on what type of accountant you are, the firm you work at, and the country you’re in. I’ve worked with hundreds of accountants and most of then were on 9.30am - 4.30pm.

US, publicly traded company. It might not be every company, but this is what I hear from most accountants, whether they work for the Big 4, or they’re corporate. Not everyone works crazy hours, but they’re definitely not 9-5, M-F. Accounting Managers have better hours, but they worked their way up and did those hours along the way.

US publicly traded companies are possibly the worst place for working hours. I worked as a Big 4 auditor in the UK with all sorts of clients (FS or industry) and literally no accountant stayed past 5pm. It was the bane of our existence.

Since Reddit is majority US, that’s why I warned people the hours aren’t always 9-5. I’ve heard the same about the Big 4 here.

[deleted]

You spend most of your life time working your job so it'd better something be that you actually like doing, is my thinking

Just do what you love and makes you happy.

If only we didn't have that damn concept of "money."

You'd most likely enjoy the sub r/dataisbeautiful then

I do data analysis and enjoy it also. Up until now i figured i was wierd since no one else i know can look at numbers and spreadshits all day lol i love reddit..

I am so sharing this with my analyst friends.

So you're a gossip

I hate this advice. Every time a similar question comes up someone always advises finding a job that the person enjoys doing/loves. This is simply not possible for everyone to accomplish and it is unlikely most people will be able to do this. Of course a bunch of anecdotal posts will fall in saying they have their dream job like it's possible or everyone.

Edit: word

Agreed, the thing is not everyone has a dream job.

Exactly. I can't think of anything that I love enough to consider my "dream job", and if I did, I wouldn't want to make it my career.

I love dogs, and I love walking my dog. So much so that when I was younger I figured "dog walking business!"

Turns out, when I have to do the thing I love, it turns into another chore and I no longer want to do it for fun.

My future career isn't my dream job, but it's something that interests me and I already have certain goals I'm determined to meet. I hope that'll be enough.

All work ends up as work. Even if it's something you enjoy.

I've had my dream job and it was rewarding. Is it easy and something i jump out of bed to gleefully do? No. It's still a job with its own suckiness.

In general I find more entertainment and joy in just doing something and the people I work with than what I actually do.

If you can find something you really love then that's great, but even if you can't there's joy to be had in just helping a customer at walmart or any other crap job. I sold mattresses and vacuums at sears when I was a kid. It was a crap job that paid commission (pretty good actually). Is that anyone's life dream? No, well I don't think so anyway. It was still fulfilling in that I got to help people make sometimes pretty large purchases on things they had little to no knowledge about. I worked in construction and landscaping as well. Just "building" something with your own labors and seeing the results is incredibly rewarding. I wouldn't consider any of these to be dream jobs.

I wasn't curing aids or building spaceships, but I was helping people all the same which was rewarding enough.

I know the feeling. I grew up around kids that loved certain things and wanted to do specific jobs but I never had any feelings like that. A coworker from my last job talked about how he was hoping to start building some furniture and maybe make that a business and he was twice my age. I just couldn't comprehend that kind of passion. I understand so.e people have it but I've never felt it.

Man, same. I teach at a school district and today the seniors had a day where the whole district gathered in the gym (very small district) to watch the seniors sign their college acceptance letters as someone narrates what the senior is going to do after high school.

There were seniors who were going into all sorts of fields, from vet tech to the military to border patrol, and I just thought ā€œI had zero fucking clue what I wanted to do when I was a seniorā€. I have never had ā€œthat one careerā€ in mind, not ever. Even now as a teacher of five years, it feels like I’ve settled and am heavily contemplating a career swap.

But what the hell would I do as a job? I don’t want to do anything. Any of my hobbies would instantly become resented by me if I somehow turned them into a job. I have no interest in any position, so all that’s left is to try to find a job I can competently do and forget about when I go home. Which is basically impossible to just pick-and-choose in this day and age.

I’m also single and have zero support anywhere near me, so I’m basically having to self-motivate to get through anything, but when you don’t fucking care about yourself, what fuels the motivation then?

I’ve known all my life that all I’ve ever wanted is to get married and become a dad, but I’m nowhere even remotely near reaching that goal. What the fuck is the point? I can’t even stick with a job I don’t want to die because of. How could I possibly go meet people if I don’t think I’m worth meeting in the first place?

Exactly. The other day I was helping my niece with her math homework, she asked me if I had anything I wanted to be when I was her age, a dream job. It was kinda depressing to tell her I didn't lol and still don't.

Agree.

Also because of the money. You could do whatever you love but that doesn't mean you get enough money to live well. A lot of artist did what they love and die sick and homeless.

One could say that at least they did not died in life in a boring souless job but good luck thinking that way and you also want to get married and have children. It is simply very risky.

Well, that's when you have to weigh the options between your want to be happy by art or through family. Personally, as an artist, I would much prefer through art and everything else extra come next. However I do balance my art with work because I can be happier for longer and create good art for longer if I'm alive.

It's not always possible to find your "dream job" but I don't think it's hard to find a job you enjoy. You probably won't wake up and be like "I LOVE WORK" but you can still find joy and feel accomplished in something you do.

I work in IT, I didn't dream about working in IT, I don't think a lot of people do, I didn't even study IT in school, I did business stuff. I was scraping for work and I just took the first thing that was offered to me. It's not my hobby, it's not my dream job but I genuinely enjoy my work. I think I consider myself kindda lucky but I've also worked jobs that I really hated.

You may not get everything you want in life but it doesn't mean you can't be happy with what you have.

Exactly. For starters, the OP said nothing about hating their job or anything other than having time out of work. Just because you like your job doesn't mean the house is going to clean itself lol

Agreed. I don't hate my job but with work responsibilities and commute I'm gone almost 11.5 hrs a day. And this is some how socially acceptable and if you complain you're the bad guy or lucky cuz someone else has it worse. My kids would like to see me around more than an hour in the evenings and on weekends

Meanwhile look around the house at all the shit you gotta do and keep yourself together. Lol my biggest problem is not cussing and muttering under my breath and simply being grumpy and accidentally getting snippy with my Wife for no reason other than I'm tired.

I agree, but I think you meant anecdotal

Thanks for catching that

I HATE when people say this to me. "Find a job doing something you love!" Uh.. I don't have tiimmeee to even find out WHAT I love! Oh, is it THAT simple? Really?

That’s why we need a UBI so we don’t have to work and we can do what we love. For me that would probably be video games

Totally agree! Find a job that provides for your basic needs with people who you don’t want to strangle every waking minute and you’ve done half of it. Then get out and enjoy that little 48hr slot of freedom with the spare cash you can save. There are just so many expectations of everyone to be the perfect and do everything and have everything. It is making us all completely miserable. It’s not about being 100% happy 100% of the time and that shouldn’t be your goal because you’ll just feel like somethings wrong with you if you feel anything but euphoria all day every day.

When you find a job where you can actually add value and get recognition from your work, you enjoy that feeling. You don’t necessarily have to love your job, you just need to be good at it, ask for feedback, and make yourself known as someone who offers value. As someone in working in a shitty rural area with only older white men, nobody my age, I still don’t mind going to work everyday because I enjoy offering my opinion and helping solve our problems, even though I really don’t even like my job.

I’ve worked a few different places and this one is probably the best advice, although having friends at work is huge for me. One job I had a ton of friends, but hated the work and it balanced out and made it enjoyable but also boring.

Now, I do different shit all the time every day, walk around a lot for my job, and i think I’m good at it and I offer a lot of efficiency with computers and completing several tasks because I’m younger and more advanced with technology. But I have no fucking friends at work. But being good at something and not being afraid to offer my opinion has made me enjoy it.

You’re right people will rarely love their job. But it’s not all bad

Well it sure as hell is, if you work towards finding something you love doing then you can get that job.

If you love helping people with their problems, and are a great listener then you CAN become a psychologist or therapist to help people. Sure it takes hard work and it requires something of yourself, you need to work to achieve something like that.

Finding something you love doing is easy. Getting toned it, may require some hardship, nothing comes easy.

This is simply not possible for everyone to accomplish and it is unlikely most people will be able to do this

So?

Sadly, this is only temporarily true. Eventually if you do something you enjoy for work, you will come to resent it. You fundamentally cannot merge your enjoyment/leisure interests with your work.

Instead, look for something to do where you will be satisfied with what you have accomplished when you look back on it all in the short and long term.

i think that depends on the person though, some people can turn passions into lucrative careers, others find the grind of it all to suck the fun out of the passion/hobby itself

That is probably true. I was just recalling a study from a few years back where they found that 2/3 of people who were doing what they enjoyed, ended up not enjoying it after only a couple years.

So, you’re right. It does depend on the person, but it is safe to assume that someone likely would end up not enjoying their passion as work given a supermajority ended up in that boat.

you know maybe this is why a lot of people ā€œsettleā€ for jobs. like i want to be a professional actor... but i find the self managing very boring tedious and life sucking. i just wanna act and have fun.

there’s this huge thing with people around my age where you HAVE to follow your passion, and if you don’t why are you alive?

but in reality we have passions and hobbies first and foremost to get fulfillment from life. to have fun. second would be to pay the bills, and tbh it’s really hard and life draining to take whatever is your escape... and treat it like a job, because once you put away the pencil and step outside your ā€œcubicleā€ you can’t go and escape in your hobby... because you were just doing that.

sorry i’m using your comment to think out loud and sort my life out lol thanks

Not a problem. It seems your plight is one many of us have or will go through.

That honestly depends how you look at it, if you consider something you love doing as a chore or forced to do, then yes I agree it may turn sour.

But doing something you thoroughly love and enjoy doing wether being independent or for someone else actually matter a lot.

Job/work satisfaction, the work you love most, feelings of professional fulfillment, are all very poor substitutes for financial freedom. If I didn't have to work, I would get up whenever, run in the park, read and picnic after, maybe stroll into the office for an hour or so to pick up some professional fulfillment, and then go to the grocery store to spend my evening cooking and playing chess and spending time with loved ones.

Signed, racing rat 15 years into the job of my dreams.

100% percent agree with you there. Financial freedom is the most important thing in a job. That said, in search of financial freedom, I’m arguing satisfying work is more important than enjoyable work.

If you need your paycheck, you don't have financial freedom. Basically none of us would replicate our professional and career choices and work as much as we do if we had financial freedom.

You're confusing getting paid to do a hobby with enjoying what you do for work. I can't make stuff in a laboratory they way I can at work. But I enjoy science so I enjoy my job.

Turning my widget making hobby into a full time job, however, would get old quickly.

I disagree. People have turned hobbies into their job, a lot of people keep that passion. For example, I know a lot of people who program at work and then go home and work on a personal project. I, on the other hand, keep that far from me when I'm at home. I don't resent it at all, I enjoy it but I just have different hobbies.

Just to offer a counter perspective, I have had a few different jobs but my current role is mostly spreadsheets and analysis (Power BI and soon Tableau), and I’m the happiest at work I’ve ever been. My employer is pretty focused on employee satisfaction, and my boss is really great. If I need time off for a family thing, no problem. If I want a vacation week, no problem, as long as my work gets done.

TL;dr Find a career that stimulates your mind, pays well enough to live, and an employer that understands work/life balance. It’s a tough proposition but office jobs can be very rewarding.

Yeah it’s all so easy!

Wish it was that easy to find something I liked doing. Most of the stuff I'm even sorta considering going back to school for, aside from taking a few years of schooling (and not guaranteeing it's what I think it will be), the actual Feild has not a lot of jobs available.

Meaning I would still have to work a normal full time min wage job, when also pulling my hair out trying to get into the Feild I would want.

Dude, you know yourself how "possible" this is.

Yes, I know how possible this is all my jobs has involved in one way or form working and communicating with people. Which is what I enjoy.

Then lucky you, but what I would love is something which is either paying me too little or I would suffer from a lot of health issues.

I could essentially just hook up with a rich Chinese and get married and not worry about money again and spend all my time on music.

I love spreadshits

Looking at spreadshits all day in the office

The hell kind of office job is this?!

Looking at spreadshits all day in the office, gets boring really, find something you actually enjoy doing.

There general consensus on 'find something you enjoy doing' is alright until you realise people are not paying you to cuddle their puppies or your hobbies (unless you are really, really good).

The only real way to find something you enjoy is to start it up yourself or once in a blue moon find an opportunity.

[deleted]

I am a single parent, I got a 8 to 4 job Monday to Thursday a 8 to 2 Friday, kids are delivered at 7 and picked up and home 4:45, then make dinner be done eating 6:30 get ready for bed tuck in kids, around 7:30 and then make lunch for tomorrow and get their backpacks and clothing ready. Fall asleep at around 9:30 or 10 PM myself, rinse repeat

What is with your comma usage? I thought you were CommaHorror at first.

Not English native I guess. Sorry.

I have no idea what school you go to but school was the mist mind numbingly boring, soul sucking thing I have ever been forced to do. Work is 1000x more stimulating for me.

I was referring more to the social aspect of school, as in the whole school experience, not just the learning/studying itself.

Adult life tends to be more routine and more settled down... but it doesn't have to be.

In school, there is a rule book.

Do x --> get grade --> graduate.

It's simple. Everyone around you is on the same path, and you know what you need to do every single day. But it's a predefined path. You end up in the same place as everyone around you.

Adult life has no rule book (except laws... and you can choose to break these if you really want to). There's a weird contradiction because living a life without rules comes with increased responsibility. It's harder... but more free. It's awesome... but sucks.

If your life is uninteresting as an adult, it's your fault. You can go do whatever you want.

I have the opposite. I hated going to school with every part of my being. I ended up anxious and borderline depressed. Since I started working I feel amazing. I do my job then go home and enjoy my free time and the money I earned without having to worry about exams or homework

Stay in scool as long as you can. I finally guaduated with my 4 year, I'm about to go back for my masters. The sole reason really is just so I won't have to work as much for a couple years.

Yup I’m doing my degree in 4 and a half, so are most of my friends. None of us really mind taking a liiiiitle bit longer to finish school.

Today's my last day of undergrad and I'm like ... what do I have to look forward to. A 40+ hour a week job with 2 weeks a year of vacation if I'm lucky? Makes me want to keep being a server but I hate people, so..

Exactly man. That’s what I mean. It just seems that with school (I’m in undergrad too), you have so much freedom to mess around even though you’re swamped with homework and exams. Once you’re done school it just seems like all of that disappears and your life revolves around working.

Depending on the job, you also have something interesting to learn/do each day.

There are plenty of jobs out there that can keep you on your toes and aren't so terribly monotonous. Maybe it's time you look for something more challenging.

Look into r/financialindependence

The concept of FIRE is amazing

Hers some advice as a mid thirtysomething. Find a job where you "get to do" rather than "got to do" it will be rewarding, enjoyable, and you wont feel as if you only have 48 hours to liflve your life. The reality is we spend a tone of time at work so make it feel as if you are luck to get to be able to do what you do. Build work relationships and a network of like minded people. Opportunities will always be presenting themselves for those get to things. This is something I wish I had learned in my 20s.

I wish I didn’t go beast mode & finish school so early. Life fucking SUCKS.

It's not that bad. You need to invest time into finding hobbies, or a side-gig you enjoy. Life doesn't slow down much as you think or is boring after school, but its what you make it.

Yeah your job will also be interesting and challenging if you do it right...

Become a teacher ! :)

Good thing my retirement plan is with taurus, make sure you aim for the back of your head where the brain stem is, people survive gsw to the head more than you think because of ignorance of anatomy

I work in hotels. I fell into it by accident and love it. You never know what you're walking in to. Might have to evict someone tomorrow. Or maybe a tornado is gonna happen later tonight. I thrive on the craziness of every day.

Everything happens for a reason...

School is far more boring and miserable than a good career.

Work a while. Save hard. Buy Stocks. Buy home with mortgage cheaper than you’re rent. Save the difference. Airbnb extra rooms. Buy another home to rent. Buy another home to rent. Rent your current home and move to a foreign country and travel the world with your new income. Takes 5 years.

I have far more free time with my job than I did in school. I am home by 5 nearly every day, which leaves 6 hours before bed to do whatever I want. Meanwhile, in school I had homework and studying.

Work isn't just a routine of doing the same thing every day (well, it depends I guess). Work can be interesting. Different things can happen every day. You learn a lot working too, much more than anything I have ever learnt at school.

Nice try, boss.

Depends on the field of work though.

[deleted]

Can you describe your day-to-day job and the path you took to get there? Sounds interesting

Don’t be. 28/m here. Been in the workforce for 6 years, in that time I’ve taken on competitive cycling, climbing, lifting, traveling and been to Europe twice, going again this year as well. I rock climb after work, ride my bike, meet up with friends, coffee shops, go to breweries. Life post college has been 100x better than college. I work 40/hrs a week and have more money and freedom than I did back then. You just can’t settle into that post work/relax on the couch routine. That will eat you up and spit out years and wonder where they went. Delete Netflix, drop the video games, get out there, make connections, make more friends. Life is long and beautiful when you are out there pushing yourself. Life flies by when you sit and waste it away.

Unfortunately you gave up your options when you decided to attend college, unless it was free for you, your gonna have to work a long time to pay it off.

Not American bruh šŸ˜‚

You can get a job where something different happens every day

You don't have to work the rest of your life if you make good money choices. Many people learn to spend what they earn, no matter the amount If you can spend your 20s really saving away decent money as much as possible and investing in an index fund you can make a serious dent in your retirement age.

In my opinion, it’s all about time management and multi tasking. If you cook, you might aswell make six portions instead of one. Cook two or three times per week, not seven times. When you go to the store, pick up everything you need for the week. Make a list so that you can be in and out quickly and only buy what you need. When you are cleaning, make sure to also do some laundry (if possible) and other tasks that needs doing.

Maybe your morning routine can be shorter? ā€Savingā€ time on regular tasks adds up and may make it possble to go to that movie or visit a friend.

Making plans with friends och family ahead of time may make it easier to manage your time.

Also, have realistic expectations regarding your free time. I would love to do more than I am but time does not allow it. Do not dwell on that, make plans according to the time you have, not the time you want to have.

Make sure that you do what you must first, work, school, cooking etc. It’s easy to put something off until the last minut instead of doing it right away.

Lastly, invite people over to your place, id possible.

Good luck!

This, but also, it’s about prioritization. Sometimes it’s okay to let the laundry go undone so you can go see your grandma.

Please, for the love, go see your grandma.

While I do agree with most of what you've said - I have personally found that as soon as I begin to make shortcuts on shit then everything falls apart around it.

For example I would often be out of the house from 5am to probably around 6 or 7pm so I didn't really have a huge amount of time after I got home to eat and shower before i needed to go to sleep. However I personally thought that cooking everyday was important to me because as soon as I stopped making a point of doing that I kinda stopped giving a shit about what I ate. And when you work huge hours and don't sleep much food is basically the only thing you're relying on to keep you going.

That said, I just did this to maintain some level of order in my life. It wasn't necessary at all.

Oh I would not advocate shortcuts, only to try and make the most of your time. If you have a narrow amount of time, in my opionion, it is better to cook for several days than to cook everyday.

I agree that food is important, thus it is easier to make time to cook a few times rather than many. It still requires some level of dedication and planning, but all time managing does and this is a great way to notice that by doing more somwtimes you have more time on other days.

Sorry if that was not clear :)

That's alright, I probably should have pointed out that what I was saying wasn't just specific to cooking. Rather that trying to streamline the processes in order to be more efficient can sometimes lead to you becoming lazy instead of more productive

[deleted]

name checks out!

Must be nice to be able to afford the education

I have always admired the nurses in my family who work only 3 days a week. I imagine the pace makes things go by pretty quickly too.

Isnt that only 36 hours though?

I've been doing it a long time and it really is fucked. The only way it could be made better is if we had three days off every week.

This is the exact reason why I dropped my job as an electrician and seized to continue with my electrical engineering degree. I began making just enough money from side work and motorcycle projects to keep me afloat and at once, I began pursuing a career as a helicopter pilot. I always loved aviation and I have discovered schedules such as week on, week off once a more experienced pilot. Granted, finances are tight but I am happier than ever.

Find a way and run with it. At times you'll be surprised at how well things could work.

I live in Nova Scotia. Wages suck but houses are dirt cheap, my house is a 400 meter walk from my office building, both of which are 1000 meters from the ocean. Makes for a laid back lifestyle.

After years of schooling coming home without homework I literally don't know what to do with all my extra time (in grad school so still have it occasionally.)

Every single day I literally get a little closer to walking out the back door and jumping on to the freeway behind my work

When I take out the trash I joke like "how convenient, when I'm done for the day I can just jump on the freeway and say fuck it"

Hopefully soon I can work up the courage to get drunk enough to do it

.... Username checks out?

You ok over there buddy?

This. Every day. You worded it perfect, I’m in the same boat. What can we do for real?

I dont see how people find time to go to the gym on top of all this. I'm tired of being told to make time for it. If I have to choose between getting two more hours of sleep or go to the gym, I'm going to sleep 99 times out of 100

My husband and I work full time. He is also in school full time- three nights a week from 5-8:30. We’ve got two kids and they get good grades. We just got back from a week in SoCal. We ski about 40 times each season, golf a lot, both my girls are in drama programs... and make it to my in-laws once a week for dinner. We’ve also got a full grown lab and just got another puppy. We’re fuckin BUSY. The only way it works is if everyone pitches in. From the time we get up to the time we go to bed we are doing something. We don’t have a defined set of everyone’s responsibilities- it just that if something needs to be done and you’re not using your hands you get to it. The motivation is that we love the hobbies. Those are our down time, so we all do our part to make it happen.

I did internships, worked, and completed two majors in college. When I got out and started working around 50-60 hours a week, I had more time to enjoy life since my college schedule was essentially wake up, go to class/study between classes, internship, and then 2-3 ten hour shifts between Friday and Sunday.

However, I have an acquaintance that majored in a relatively easy major, didn’t work, and didn’t do any extracurricular activities, so she felt her after college work life was soul sucking.

I guess it comes down to perspective.

Well, you could say fuck it and do what many homeless travelers do: say fuck the rat race and hit the road. /r/Vagabond

You should look forward to dying or find something interesting to do with the small amount of money you have left after the government takes their share.

You also have to realize your school/work situation is waaay more time a full time job!! Also, once you have a career you work your butt off for a few years but can eventually advocate for more flexibility and freedoms. Many people just accept what they are given and make it work, but I firmly believe you need to value yourself enough to ask for what works for you. I have not lost a job from that yet, the worst they can say is no and they risk losing a valuable employee when they say that.

I’m very lucky in this regard, I choose my own work hours and minimum wage in my country (Australia) is the highest in the world, I make almost double the minimum though so I choose to work really few hours! Immigrate to Australia and work for a big company!

That's why people tell you to get a job doing something you're passionate about. So that you can avoid slaving away doing some menial job for the rest of your life.

I'm genuinely not trying to be rude here. But it's an extremely novel idea that humans are supposed to have all this free time to "just enjoy life." Every generation has its ups and downs with the economic tides but if you take an honest look through history you see that life has ALWAYS been about work, not play. This is especially true in agricultural societies. And in my opinion that's a good thing. Work is a good thing. Discipline is a good thing. Doing things you have to that you don't want to is a good thing. Time management is a skill everyone should learn. The average person can find 4-5 hours PER DAY that are being wasted if they tried hard enough.

Used to be Sundays off for church. Weekend is such a novel concept, we just got used to it really quickly

Then stop. You don’t have to do anything, you chose to do it because it’s the best course of action for your life. If you don’t want to do it, just don’t do it. However, you have to realize there is a reason you do it in the first place and not doing it has consequences. Choose to run your life the way you WANT and you’ll be a lot happier.

Learn to live below your means. And take all your shits in the morning.

I work full time and it’s honestly not that bad.

I work Monday to Friday, 9AM to 5PM. I leave for work around 8:15 and get home around 5:45. That leaves me about six hours a night for myself, then weekends.

Plus I get 20 days a year vacation and five days personal (kinda the same thing), so I have the ability to go on trips.

"with little time to do anything"... What? If we're talking about a 40 hour week, the typical schedule is either 4x10 or 5x8. If you work 10 hour days, you still have 6 hours of free time per day, even if you sleep 8 hours. 6 hours is plenty to get shit done, considering you're looking at a 3 day weekend. If you only work 8 hours, you have 8 hours of free time and 8 hours of sleep. Most people sleep 6 hours, so you have 10 hours of free time, 8 hours of work... If you can't find any way to possibly enjoy your life and hobbies with 10 hours per work day, then you are your problem, not the job.

If most people sleep 6 I would say between getting ready for bed, going to bed, actually sleeping, waking up and getting out of bed, it would be more like 8.

Getting ready for work takes min 15 minutes, possible 1 - 2 hours commuting. Expected to be there 15 min early.

Add in groceries, making 3 big meals to split between suppers and lunches for the whole week. That's another 1h per work day on average.

Add in winddown time after stressful workday that's another 1/2h.

So we went from 8 hours of free time per workday to 4.

Now 2 weekend days and 4 hours during the weekday really isn't that bad.

Add in OT, fixing and upgrading shit yourself, errands, exercise, visiting friends or family once every couple weeks, squeeze in 1 or 2 very casual hobbies and that's life.

I'm not complaining. I have enough free time. But to say you have 10 hours of free time per workday is just not true.

Lol you're including wind down time? That's called fucking free time. A 1-2 hour commute is extreme. If you waste 2 hours per day getting ready for and waking up from sleep, then you're lazy lol. Your time management blooooows

How old are you? I see you've clearly never had stressful job. If your job is stressful enough that you have to go home and sit in a dark room for a 1/2 hour I INCLUDE that as time spent for work.

1 hour commute TOTAL is very normal in any major city. 1/2 hour there and 1/2 hours back is not far.

I said 6 hours plus up to 2 more hours to get to sleep, etc. Because most people just don't punch their time card out at 22:00 and fall asleep instantly. Then include those people who actually get the recommended amount of sleep (more than 6 hours).

"your life and hobbies with 10 hours per work day"

or else

"Your time management blooooows"

You are vastly oversimplifying things here. You realize there is a middle ground right?

Whatever makes you feel better lol... The reality here is that you have bad time management and it also sounds like maybe some maturity issues. I work in a decently crucial position in a wind power company, dealing with millions of dollars of revenue, monthly. I guarantee my job is far more stressful, you condescending asshat.

Sure I get how you may have strong feelings about this issue. Sending good thoughts.

"you condescending asshat." Guess you got a taste of how you are coming off to other people.

Your response to my first post was insulting, so I returned the favor. If you can't take it don't give it.

Good for you if manage to have a ton of free time everyday and don't need wind down time from your extremely stressful job. Not everyone is in the same situation as you, not everyone deals with stress as easily, and not everyone has a ton of "free" time.

"If you can't find any way to possibly enjoy your life and hobbies with 10 hours per work day, then you are your problem, not the job." Do you still stand by your statement that everyone literally has 10 hours of free time a day? Because this is just blowing my mind.

And again you are insulting my time management without knowing anything about me. I get a lot of shit done and manage to have hobbies. My post is simply trying to highlight that not everyone has as much free time as you seem to believe, and that it's not always due to "Your time management blooooows".

Yep still stand by everything I said, a fuckin month ago... You really do suck with time lol

Sorry for not spending all my time replying to people on reddit.

The way you talk reminds me of a friend of mine and also of a colleague. If you are also having difficulties interacting with people in real life you should probably talk to someone.

Working from 08:00-16:30. I am home at 17:00. have about 6 hours to do something before sleep. In 6 hours you can do many things...

Its really all about time management.

I like the people I work with, the work I do is hard, but rewarding, my home is a reminder of what hard work brings me as far as stability and ownership is concerned, my family is provided for and I am working towards retirement.

There’s more to it and everyday isn’t great, but it’s all enough to make me happy with my life. Keeping things in perspective, we live in a very fortunate time period.

Make your job one of your hobbies. Or make it your main hobby. For example I wanna be a ski instructor which seems like a dream job to get paid to ski (usually it’s the other way around ).

Little time? If you work 8-5 and go to bed at 10-11, that's 5 to 6 hours of free time to do whatever you want. OP says she has a 2 HOUR morning routine, that's nuts. I am up and at work in 35-60 minutes every day max!

The expectation that you need a whole day to do anything meaningful is silly. 5 hours is enough to cook and eat a simple meal, watch TV, garden, play video games, study, whatever. It does get harder with kids because they require so much maintenance, but generally speaking most people who work a single 8-5 have a lot of free time.

I’m over it and I’m 20. Fuck.

Unless your the 1% your gonna live a hell hole. My folks came from the slums and even in there 50s we are ā€œmiddle classā€ they still have to work 24/7.

Just get a job that's mildly interesting

I work 40 plus hours a week doing construction and I still think I have plenty of time to do the things I like/need to do after work and on the weekends... I’m not sure I understand the post.

What’s even crazier is that we spend way more time with the people we work with rather than the people we love.

Sad.

https://youtu.be/8CrOL-ydFMI

The human can't deal with complete true freedom. Most would go insane.

In elementary and middle school I would always think about this too. How am I suppose to do stuff when I only two day weekends lol But since I’m job searching now Have too much time and running out of things to do

It's really about how you productively use your free time. I shared a similar sentiment when I was in college because I was grinding away balancing a full school load while working full-time. I spent a couple of years post grad 'decompressing' and not working a traditional 9-5 and grew so bored and tired of it. I enjoy the work that I do now and it has very nicely assimilated into my life. I enjoy accomplishing tasks and it makes me feel good as a human to have a productive day. I still have time after work and am so adjusted to my sleep schedule now that I do a lot more hobbies and socializing between the hours of 6-10. Four hours is enough time to get a lot done and feel satisfied.

Easy, don't live in the USA..or japan for that matter.

Im home by 3 most days. No kids. Plenty of money... problem is figuring out what to do to pass the time... everyone has problems

One of the best decisions of my life was working as a nurse. We work 3x12 hr shifts. I will schedule 3 shifts at the end of one week and the beginning of the following week. So I work 6 days on and 8 days off. It’s like a mini vacation every week. If I had to work the 5x8hr shifts every week I would go crazy. I feel like if I am already at work let’s just get it over with. If I was allowed and had the mental and physical capacity I would work a 36hr stretch and be done each week.

Go live in the wild, Mick Dodge style!

Isn't there some saying about if you're bored then that means you're lucky enough in life to experience it? Once all your survival mechanisms have been satisfied and you get to experience boredom then that's a good thing. Its when you're bored that people seek change.

/r/FinancialIndependence/

come back with little time to do anything.

Why do you think this is the case? I work 10-6ish, and when I get home, I have like, 4-5hrs of free time before I go to bed. There's a lot you can do in that time.

I worked a full time job (IT) and then refereed volleyball 3 nights a week for a while. Most of my days felt like they were 8AM-10PM non stop. I found that if I woke up early vs staying awake late the day was much more productive. I started working out in the morning before work and it really changed my perspective on the day. I started keeping an honest log of where I was spending time and found that a lot of it was wasted at night just watching tv or "decompressing" after work (really just doing nothing). Once I saw on paper what my schedule looked like I took the wasted time and reallocated it to productive things or hobbies of mine. It helped get me out of the feeling like I never had time for anything.

a lot of it was wasted at night just watching tv or "decompressing" after work (really just doing nothing)

Ding ding ding!

It's easy to ignore that time, because when you're tired and you get home, you feel like the day is over. But the day isn't over. THAT is your free time for the day. And you need to decide whether you're going to spend that time watching TV (which is fine, I often do that too), or working on something!

Is it really free time if I’m too exhausted to do anything?

Sometimes I’m too tired after work to even open up Netflix. I just lie in bed staring at the ceiling until I fall asleep.

[deleted]

[deleted]

I highly encourage you to start working out BEFORE you hit your goal weight. There's no reason to put it off (unless you have a disability or something that's preventing you). You'll thank yourself! This is advice coming from somebody who lost over 100 pounds. I don't regret one moment I spent exercising even when I was way bigger.

Why are you so tired? What do you do? How many hours per day?

Don’t know why you’re getting downvoted. Seems like a genuine question. People get tired for different reasons (not eating regularly enough, not getting enough sleep, hyperfocusing for long periods, not being physically active, etc)

(not eating regularly enough, not getting enough sleep, hyperfocusing for long periods, not being physically active, etc)

Lmao, I do all of these

[deleted]

I use the tired thing a lot. But if I'm honest, it's not really the same as being tired. Tired means you can go to sleep.

True. It’s not sleepy tired, it’s like ā€œI’m fully awake and aware but moving my arms right now seems like a journeyā€ tired

I think a lot does have to do with screentime and then mindless consumption of entertainment. It just feels like a brain melt but it didn't really engage the brain. Granted I've felt it all my life so idk how to really brake free. I'm either always tired or actually too busy to be enjoying things.

Bingo. If you come home to an empty apartment, sit on the couch and turn on an episode of the office you’ve seen 47 times, your body is 100% going to go into energy conservation mode.

On the opposite end of the spectrum, if you got off work and someone was trying to hunt you down and kill you, or if you were given 3 hours to solve a complex puzzle and win $10 million, I guarantee you would not be ā€œtiredā€.

Those are ridiculous scenarios but just trying to prove a point. Don’t try and figure out how to not be tired to enjoy your hobbies, find hobbies that keep you from feeling tired.

Then roll that time over to the next morning. Go to sleep right away, get up early, and you have a ton of time before work.

THIS!. I work 2 jobs. My M-F 8-5, then after that, 5:30 to anywhere between 10&12:30. Then, home. And I work that second job on weekends, too. And whatever evens I'm NOT at that second job, I'm at my Granny's hanging out with her, doing her dinner, etc. Any "free time" is just me being too tired to do anything but function at a basic level.

Yeah I agree. I need that time. I hate the constant going going going feeling. It makes it hard to think clearly

Same, especially after this week when it's been stressful af, I'm pretty sure I'm gonna go home today (being friday) and zone out on youtube for hours before turning on my PS4 even. And I hate doing that because I feel like I'm wasting my free time.

I think you're missing the point that people are too tired to do anything after work and need that time to rest. It's not much of a life.

or working on something

Work after work, sounds excellent!

Oh come on. I meant working on something fun like a hobby and you know it.

Life is a lot like a Persona game.

Yeah it surprising how much we can wast 1/3 of our day, feel busy, but accomplish nothing. There are typically 7-9 waking hours per weekday where you aren’t working during a 40 hours a week. If you spend 7-9 hours just doing laundry and cleaning, you suck at laundry and cleaning.

I find I waste a ton of time staring at my phone, Netflix, etc. writing it down is a good starting point to finding where the day is wasted.

When I went to the office, just getting presentable for work took an hour, commuting took 2 hours each way, and getting ready for bed took another hour or so (10 step Korean skincare routine). That's 6 hours gone right there, never mind making/eating breakfast and dinner. I home cook everything, so breakfast is easy, but dinner takes another 20-45 min of active kitchen time.

Now that I work remotely, I'm actually able to pursue my hobbies and have a social life.

saving this for when i need to block out time later, decompressing atm

This reply should be further up.

But..it kinda contradicts what OP is saying.

This response is saying people should instead re-evaluate their already busy schedules by possibly cutting out sleep, relaxing or de-stressing after work, and by micro managing your every last second to live life.

So it doesn't address the problem. There isn't enough time to live life is the point.

So sure, we can see this as 'you have to make time to live life' which is basically what this reply is saying. Therefore, sleep less, de-stress less, relax less and record every last second to efficiently live life.

At first glance, this is can be seen as a very reasonable response but it actually isn't. It's undermining the bigger elephant in the room and that is by the norms of our social construct, keeping busy is productive. If you're not busy, achieving, learning, going places, making money, getting less sleep, pretending you're not sick, and pretending you're not mentally stable then you're unproductive.

OP is questioning this very exact problem. How anyone is even able to live life when we're so busy, why are we continuing to hold our breaths longer and longer because only then we'll get a little more time to live more life.

Addressing societal issues and trying to cope with individual problems are not mutually exclusive.

What my reply was intended to show was that I had the same feeling as OP but with changing my habits and more importantly changing my mindset I was able to shake that funk. Its possible to do all the things they are doing and have time for all the things you want to do. It just takes some evaluating and self awareness of what is actually occupying your time.

My experiences made me realize that I just thought I was too busy but there was always time for I wanted to do.

Edit: wording

And that’s what I’m addressing.

To keep this short, her situation is being lessened by saying it’s not a problem if you just stuff more things into your already busy day. Then your problem will feel like it’s a lesser problem!

I understand your experiences are yours but I was addressing her original question which your response was pushing a double negative. I was just throwing some criticism. Not saying it’s right or wrong just pointing out it’s not a elegant solution one could say, hence contradiction.

Is he though?

I wish I could upvote this more than once. Here's some broke bitch gold šŸ…

Unfortunately reddit doesn't like taking a hard looking the mirror and focusing on yourself and minimizing your toxic habits

It's not that hard of a look. I like tv. Busybodies can tell me I'm lazy if they want to, but it's not their time to fuck with.

You do you man, no worries with enjoying time off. Just don't complain about it lol

I like this response a lot because it’s so honest.

This is the correct answer. I found myself kind of floating through life after getting out of the military, despite having a fairly successful job, and a wife and kid. The job required i work 3-4 a week on 12 hour shifts, so when i was working it was just work,sleep,work, but i found that i had no time on the weekends to "do" anything, even though they were almost double as long as i was used to. I would stay up crazy late trying to feel like I was accomplishing something, as if sitting on the couch and watching community for the 13th time was getting me anywhere. Then one day i decided to stat taking the time i would have stayed awake and put it towards waking up in the morning instead. started working out again before work and you add in that summer is coming so the winter depression is finally getting shaken off and i feel much better

Yeees. Working out makes me feel so productive. My boyfriend and I made a routine where 5 days a week, he comes home at 7am and wakes me (usually doesn’t happen till about 8-9am because I like sleep) and we go to the gym after we eat breakfast. When I wake up, all I want to do is go back to bed. When we get home from the gym, I almost always want to stay active even if it’s just doing chores. I got injured at work so we’re holding off on the gym until I’m mostly healed. Today was so much different. I didn’t get up till 10am and then I took forever to eat breakfast. We didn’t get to spend the quality time together at the gym although that was for the best because he needed sleep. My day feels like it’s both incomplete and pretty much gone even though it’s only 1pm.

Bingo. I have a full time job, twins under three, and a spouse getting a PhD. I still have time to pursue my hobbies/likes.

167 hours, Every week has 167. 167 - 56 f(or sleep) - 40 (for work) still leaves 71 hours a week to do whats important to you.

I know things kinda suck right now. Going to school and working is not a fun experience. When you get out of school and working a 40 things will be easier. If you start getting into the habit of sleeping right, eating right and devoting 4-6 of those 71 hours to exercising things will get a lot easier. I found a lot of my feeling like I didn't have time to do anything was more me not having the energy to enjoy my time. Sleep + eating+ workout will fixed that for me.

Same! I work 6am to 7-9pm daily mon and Thursday and Friday from 6-2.

I absolutely know what you mean by nights being wasted just shitting on the couch haha and time goes by and your like shit, it’s bed time I didn’t do anything lol

I wake up 4:30am and go to bed at 11pm I can 100% say your most productive in the morning and the earlier you wake the better you feel

This is exactly what I did. I spent all of my time not at work playing video games and watching TV, or doing chores of course. Life was stale and unimaginative. Now I go on walks with my girlfriend, read, draw (the best I can :p) and am always looking for new hobbies. Life is still a bit stale, but it's getting better and I'm always looking for new hobbies.

This is very true, most people who say they’re too busy to do anything are actually wasting a lot of time when you get down to it and look at what they’re actually spending they’re time doing. I’ve felt the same way too until I realized what I was doing. In my busy season at work we work 16 hour days 7 days a week and once you get into that routine then go back to regular 40 hour weeks it’s hard to know what to do with all the free time for a while.

But how do you deal with being tired after the training? Coding feels like a hell to me after a morning strength work out

Coding might not be for you then.

Why tho?

Physical exercise hinders your mental capability?

And this is why I work out before the bed?

It really shouldn't though

I deal with more hardware and help desk type stuff. I couldn't imagine coding for hours a day

I’d like to hear more about how you logged your time? Was it every hours? Half hour? Did you log it as you went or at the end of the day?

I kept notes on my phone throughout the day and transferred them to an excel spreadsheet while at work. Mostly in half hour increments.

Catalogued things as sleep, work, TV, exercise, housework and my favorite "useless time". That was time that I couldn't classify as anything else. It showed me that I wasn't accomplishing things when I could have.

After three weeks started doing some excel magic and found the percents of everything. Sleep and work were mostly the same. I just had to be self aware of the time outside of that.

How would you suggest logging your time spent on certain things? I find that I begin to write stuff down, but then midway through the day I forget about logging stuff and I waste a bunch of time

I used google keep to jot quick notes on my phone then when you have some computer time transfer it to excel. Even if you don't track every minute, each time you mark something down it becomes part of the bigger picture and you build the habit

studying

Well there’s your problem right there!

Yes. I just went back to school from being in the workforce for \~20 years. I now take 12 credits per semester and work 15 hours. I had a lot more free time when I was working full time, because school is a lot of work outside of class! Plus, there's a lot of organization that goes into how to spend your study time. Basically any free time that I allow myself right now, I feel guilty about.

That’s what I tell my plumber friends. They think my life is great because I don’t get up at 5 am but really you’re always ā€œworkingā€. You don’t get relaxing nights at home and there is so much pressure to get stuff done on the weekend it’s not relaxing. There is always something you should be doing/studying

EXACTLY But then I tell people that, at least this semester, I've had an exam worth (altogether) 40% of my grade every Saturday night for one class and every Thursday night for another,they back off. With 18 credit hours and work and cleaning, exams, midterms, finals and everything else, my entire "weekend" is Sunday from whenever I wake up to 5pm when I start homework. Idk how my classmates do it AND get A's. I'm bout ready to give up

It’s exhausting. Try not to compare yourself to others. We’ll get through this and be happy we did when it’s all dome!

Yeah. I'm lucky enough that I'm not in a field where grades matter, and I'm not eligible for student aid, so I just give a reasonable effort. I've gotten some As, but I'm mostly a B student now and that's so much better for my mental health! Even still, some of the grades can sting a bit sometimes!

Lol I'm a commuter student, so I get the "best" of both worlds! I, too, get up at 5 a.m. It was... an adaptation (I was always a night owl...)!

I hate homework so god damn much man. All through school my grades suffered, because when Im not at school/work, I just dont think about it.

As a tradesman now, Im even willing to work late and shit, but once the trucks in the shop and im omw home, i dont respond to work calls.

Yeah, when I was in high school, I could get good grades without ever studying, so I pretty much had the same mindset, and didn't develop the kind of discipline needed for further studies from a young age, and it's hurt my performance, I think.

I love/loved being able to just compartmentalize life! Work is at work and stays there! :)

Basically any free time that I allow myself right now, I feel guilty about.

After I graduated, I realized the thrill of procrastinating on schoolwork was what gave my life meaning.

I'm not sure what to make of that! Is it a good, or bad thing? Should I try to make my procrastination more thrilling? :D

The courses "say" 12 credit hours, but you usually end up putting in 3x that much time into the classes.

I agree! The majority of my downtime comes from the fact that when I clock out at 5pm, it is generally not expected that I be doing homework or extra work, and my weekends are not expected to be full of work as well, it's just my time to be chill and/or do the adulting I need to do. That being said, I work a job where for about four months of the year I have insane hours and what even are weekends and etc., so this state of affairs only applies to the 8 months of the year when I'm on office work and a regular 40 hour work week. I definitely feel like I have flexible time to be myself and breathe.

As far as adulting goes, I find it's important to multitask on the shitty stuff and occasionally throw in some chill time as well e.g. start a load of laundry then go cook dinner, change the load once you're done eating, take a chill pill for a while and then watch something on my computer or TV while putting laundry away.

NB: I am a 32-year-old adult, but I don't feel like I have my shit together at all times. Some days are really hard and some weeks are really hard and there is no instructional manual for life, so yeah we all feel like failures sometimes. Please don't see my positive comments and advice as "I have my time management on point and nothing ever goes wrong with that plan."

You have a full-time job AND you're going to school.

That's way more than what most people are dealing with.

Yeah I'm really confused.

OP, what you're experiencing now is not the equivalent of a full time job. With school and work, you basically have two jobs. And yeah, most people working two jobs don't have time for other stuff.

But I work 40h a week (ish, sometimes it's more) and I have plenty of free time. Because once I leave work for the day, I'm done. There's no homework or studying ya know?

I don't know, I'm still pretty confused. OP stated that they do school on weekends, on days they aren't working. Presumably working full time means 8-9 hours at work a day, and I can't imagine more school than that. Assuming they are getting a solid 8 hours of sleep a day also, that leaves 7-8 hours of unaccounted for time.

Maybe they are showering and getting ready for what, 2 hours max? Thats still 5-6 hours. Cooking breakfast or dinner could be another hour or two maybe. I'm still confused as to how they don't have time to do ANYTHING.

[deleted]

There's also traveling to and from and getting yourself ready for another day in public that takes up a lot of time. When I was doing it I also dialed back my studying to keep the balance. I was capable of high grades, but the amount of effort that it took wasn't worth it for every course. I settled for medium grades in certain classes just to keep my life balanced.

Don't forget all that other stuff like vacuuming, cleaning the kitchen/bedroom/bathroom, organizing clothes, washing clothes. I also think OP means going out to do things like spending time with friends and on activities and not like watching YouTube which is doable while doing a lot of the things I mentioned above

You’ve definitely forgotten about studying and homework! Profs usually recommend you spend 3x as much time working on work for their classes out of class as you do in class. Not that most people do, but they sometimes assign you that much work. Also there could be a commute.

Good points, forgot about homework. And I have never had a bad commute to work so I always forget about those with long commutes..

Think about all the times you might have complained about timing and time in a general sense. Its not that "well the math says this and you have a perfect 5 hours a day."

The argument is that their life is so congested that OP doesn't have the freedom to do anything that makes them happy. So the math may say 5 hours, but if you're expected to be 30 mins early to things and the events "school, work, sleeping, eating, etc." are spaced out to the point of crippling ever having a free hour to yourself then you start to get the full picture. As someone that recently graduated, not having to actually travel to class, worry about it on the weekends or even in my gas budget has helped tremendously! Hope that atleast kind of helps the confusion!

I do not envy that life.

When I was in college I'd be at school Monday-Thursday full time, then go to work for around 40 hours from Friday-Sunday at a theme park. I didn't realize how burned out I was until after I graduated and then only had to focus on my career.

But hey, that job paid for most of my college and I was debt-free a few years later for about a year or so before I got a mortgage.

This is like me. I kinda wish I could create a collection of redditors that did something similar to me. Only to find out where I'm unique, and where you made mistakes and can be avoided.

I built a super expensive house. Mistake...

Right here. I did full time (18-19 credits) school while working part time (15-35hr/w) for my first few years of college. I got major burnout and took some time off. After coming back I got a summer internship and holy cow, a normal 40 hour work week felt like a vacation. LOVED it. I've had old people try to tell me "oh you've got it so easy wait till you start working" and I can't help but laugh. A full time job is so much easier than that gauntlet I ran for those years.

Yeah, getting a full time job was a much easier lifestyle for me than even just being in school (full time 15-18 credit hours) with a 8-10 hour a week work schedule.

I have disposable income, my off time is my own (except for when I'm on call for work, but then I can just watch shows at home or read a book or whatever).

Really, working at a job with some vacation time is the life compared to school.

I did that for 8 fucking years. No, it's not normal and it's not healthy. I developed some serious insomnia and anxiety. I had a family of my own though.

OP works minimum wage. Next chance, try to get work study or when the opportunity arises to get a higher paying gig until school is done, reduce the hours worked and have the same take home pay.

I did this, once you are done, you feel like you have SOOO much free time.

I do. I work an equal time rotation. 14 days on 14 days off. It took a few years for my family and myself to get used to my being away for two full weeks, but its paid off. We live like we're on holidays for half the year. I get tons of time with my kids without distractions, we travel, camp. I don't think I could ever go back to a 5 day work week

What job is that? And how did u score it?

Sounds like a fly in fly out worker - mine, oil rig etc...

Barge workers too, I know some people who do that, 3 weeks out, 3 weeks in.

Airline pilots too depending on the airline.

Airline pilots too depending on the hairline.

His username checks out

Good guess, land rig though. You can drive in.

Drilling Fluids Engineer, also known as Mud Man. Its hard to break into, but when the oil patch is picking up it's not impossible. If you have a four year degree in almost anything ( it doesn't have to be chemical engineering, or even engineering) try to get on with an oil field service provider like Halliburton. They'll have you sign a 2 or 3 year contract, and the pay isn't great, but they'll train you. And the training for DFEs is pretty top notch, at Halliburton at least. Schlumberger, MI Swacco and now I think Newpark all have in house training programs that are recognized worldwide. The pay for the first few years isn't great, but once you have been in it awhile you can break into consulting. And then the money is damn good. I work half the year and make more than most doctors

Money is pretty great in the oil fields only thing sucks is when the boom is over. Always gotta save for the bust

This response is much needed

I'm sure it's a job you wouldn't want.

It's almost certainly working on an oil rig in the gulf or something like that

I do work the same way as him on an oil rig, but its not a bad job. Am doing technical stuff just as i would every other place, my room is de en sized and the food is eatable, not a shitty job at all, and pays more than the same job would on land AND i have more freetime

Do you happen to be a chemical engineer? I’m looking to get into oil/gas once I graduate, and was wondering what the day-to-day of a technical worker looks like.

No, iam the "it guy" as its a Pretty big place. But basicaly you work 10-12 hours a day and then Use the spare time to hang out with the rest of the crew doing fin stuff. But i can defently reccomendations working a place like that!

Oh wow, that sounds really nice. Glad the job allows you spare time to chill with coworkers, 10-12 hours straight sounds exhausting lol.

Thanks for the quick response, I appreciate your insight!

Its usually 10-2 for remote rigs (10 months work, 2 months time off at home), at least in Asia and Africa. That's of course when you work at site. If you're into process rather than production, its a regular desk job.

Yep, lots of fly in fly out jobs in Australia are 84 hour weeks and then equal time off. Pretty fucked but good money if you can handle it

I don't know many people that have a better job than mine. I'm treated well, the work is challenging, and on most rigs the hands are good and are easy to get along with. These guys live with each other half the year, you get along or you'll go home.

Gotta wait 2 weeks till they’re off again.

Lol ya this guy’s living the life (depending on how much he makes of course)

I'm in the top 5% for the U.S. income brackets. I do a lot better than most in my profession, but even the average DFE is probably in the top 10%

My dad has a similar schedule in a factory

[deleted]

Natural gas field work is like this as well. I would advise against some traveling technician spots because the 14 on 14 off can often turn into 100+ on and 7 off if you let it.

[deleted]

That's very interesting. But do you only take 2 weeks-long gigs? Or companies accept your 2 weeks-long breaks?

With the company I primarly work with at the moment I'm doing 2 weeks on / 2 weeks off on a yearly basis. They really need me, they can't recruit because the job market is atrocious (for the company) where I live and I'm pretty good at what I do.

As someone getting into the software developing job market, which type of jobs or companies do this and what should I do to try and achieve a similar position?

Replying to this so I can see the reply later.

Also FacetheTruth, where do you live if you dont mind saying.

Sounds like a nurse, or something similar

Sounds like a fisherman

I know a lot of nurses who have this schedule.

Sounds like a nursing schedule

I get months off during the summer because academia.

In some European countries it's home elderly care/assistance.

Many trade skills at industry type places are like this. Electricians, operators, etc.

His user name is mud money so I believe he’s a mud logger on an oil rig(source I’ve had that job)

Mud man, I don't believe loggers make much money. And their schedule sucks!!



They don’t make a whole lot and some companies will give them rotation but not many!

Some of the loggers I know stay out months at a time. I think I'd lose my mind!

Its very common in manufacturing plants that run 24/7.

They will run 2 12 hour shifts a day.

Op answered further down the line, but for years my dad had the same type of schedule as a doctor. He would work for about 5-10 days(it changed every few months) straight then would get that amount of time off. As a kid it was great because that man is a workaholic so if it was his day off he had 30 projects to do that weren’t worth the time.

My father works 7 months straight but gets 5 months off, paid. Cruise ship manager position.

Edit: payed -> paid

I think you mean paid, dawg.

Username checks out, holy shit

Wow, it's not a bot 8|

Well I'll be Goddamn.

This. A family member also does this and when I spoke to them they said, "I wish I had knew this job existed fifteen years earlier."

Absolutely! I got my son into this about 15 years earlier than I started. Kid will be able to retire before 50 if he's careful

This is like mine. Rotating nights and days, 3-4days/nights but once a month i get 7days off.

I work in a manufacturing plant. We do shift work, 12 hour shifts, rotate between nights and days. With how the schedule shakes out, we get 7 consecutive days off every 4 weeks.

I worked 12hr/day-7 on 7 off for 6 years until I recently got promoted into management and I miss that 7 days off a lot. It really is like being on vacation every other week, plus when you take 1 week off you get three.

14 on and 14 off, that not full time right?

With the average month being 30 days and the average weekend days per month being 8-9, that would mean you are simply working fewer days and thus having more free time. Unless I'm missing something here

For me its actually 14 days straight, 24hrs a day. That's not to say I'm actually working 24hrs a day (of course), but I live on the rig and am available 24hrs a day on top of my regular duties. My son does the same job but he's on 12 hrs a day, 28 days on and 28 days off

Ah that makes much more sense, must be hard being away from your family for that long. I totally misunderstood..

Don’t spend so much time getting ready for a minimum wage job. That might get you five hours a week. That’s all I could come up with.

But it’ll get better when you’re done with school. Unless you have kids, then it’s all over for another 16 years until they can drive.

Edit: Of course I was joking about kids. Sort of, lol. My youngest is off to college this fall, Raising my kids was the most joyful thing I’ve ever done. It was very hard at times as they were adopted and very needy for a while, but they made our lives so rich. My life would had been so boring without them.

Minimum wage/Maximum wage, if it takes you 2 hours to get ready for work and say 15 minutes of that is your commute, well then there is a lot of time being thrown away for taking a shower and putting on makeup. That could be a good place to start buying some more time. Also maybe pick out your clothes that you are going to wear the next day right before you get into bed, if that is something that takes you a while to decide on in the morning.

Getting ready for the day is often the only time I have to myself. Not only am I preparing for the day, I’m reflecting on the previous day and putting thought into the day ahead. Having that alone time is honestly helpful for my mental clarity, which is crucial to successfully navigating a busy schedule. Not saying the process can’t be streamlined, but I wouldn’t want to give up what little me time I have in the day.

Besides, OP included their commute in that 2 hours. They could have to drive for an hour.

I'm the same way! I love drinking my coffee and doing my skincare/makeup and retrospecting. Does so many wonders for my mental health to process it all when I'm doing something that doesn't need to much critical thought.

You've got it figured out

I literally roll out of bed and attempt to hunt down some pants ten minutes before I have to be on the road

It's not safe for me to drive if I've been awake less than an hour.

If you’re driving an hour for a college/low wage job that’s not a good start. I would imagine there would be equal/better options closer

That zen time you refer to then should be considered how you or her use your daily free time. For better or worse, that is a choice for how to spend your time.

Then she needs to cut back her commute too. 2 hrs of daily commute and looking to free up time, move closer to your work and granny's house.

Thanks for letting me know.

I agree, I work in an office and while some people do go all out with their make up I’m just happy to put on the basics in 15 min and call it a day. The only exception to this I’d say would be if your face is in front of a camera and you need to look very professional and presentable

Mostly (there are exceptions) there is already a dedicated hairstylist, make up professional, etc. for that if you're working with cameras.

You do have a point!

:) I guess I am just too lazy to do stuff, that's why I immediately thought "this is something I wouldn't need to take care of".

I need like 30 minutes in the morning max, this includes waking up, get dressed, wash face, teeth, put cream, deodorant and perfume on, grabbing my things, putting on my shoes/coat/scarf and walking to the train. Sometimes I even squeeze in lady-hygiene or putting in lenses, which I need a max of 10min more of. I never understood how people can waste so much of their precious time and sleep when it comes to get ready to work.

How about eating? That’s my big one. Also do you feel rushed while doing this?

No, I have a steady routine, first bathroom, then clothes, then going on the train. I don’t eat, because we have free fruits to eat. If we didn’t have them, I would simply grab a banana with me. :)

So glad I’m in the trades, just throw on some carhartts and a button up and boots and I’m out the door. No point in makeup if it’s just getting covered up by grease and soot by the end of the day. Today I woke up exactly 15 minutes before I had to leave the house and made it to work 5 minutes early.

Maybe OP really enjoys makeup? Reddit loves to hate women for wearing and enjoying makeup, it’s wild.

I have days of both - some days hair is in a bun and I’m wearing my glasses. And then other days I’m wearing half the colors out of a modern renaissance palette. Most people enjoy the actual application, it’s fun. And OP could be one of those! Also you mention ā€˜wasting time on a shower’ ummmm maybe not skip that time. I know people mention showering the night before but yo curly hair doesn’t play that game.

Picking out clothes the night before is a+ though. If I know I have to be up early the next day I’ll plan something in my mind the night before. It might change at the last minute but it definitely helps. When I had a car it was also easy for me to keep a change of clothes and shoes in it if I needed them.

I've found there is very little value in varying your work wardrobe. I have two pairs of black work trousers, and five white shirts. No decisions necessary. But no-one even notices. Though I acknowledge that this might be different if you are a woman. Really no one cares as long as you are smartly dressed.

Holy fuck. It takes 2 hours for people to get ready for work?

That doesn't even make sense. How fuckin ugly do you have to be to need 2 whole hours?

I wake up, drink coffee, shower for 10-15, shave/clip nails/brush teeth, dress in non-wrinkly clothes, which can involve a trip to the dryer, walk my dog (30min), cook breakfast (potatoes eggs bacon spinach errday), and have time to read some news or a book before I set up the house for the dog, lock up, and drive 10min into work at 9am. Takes about 2hrs to do leisurely. I'm supposed to do a short core workout and ride the stationary bike too but I haven't had time bc I don't bother rushing around as fast as I can because it adds stress to the day.

at that point it feels like you are doing much more than just getting ready for work. This is a leisurely weekend getting up thing more than a getting up for work thing.
If thats how you want to spend your time thats of course fine, but it also explains when other people have seemingly much more time to meet up or follow hobbies after work.

[deleted]

I like to get some cardio in with the dog every morning because I feel like it dramatically improves our quality of life. The exercise keeps him healthy and strong and provides me with some mental clarity and energy for the day.

Think about it another way. Why would you not walk your dog in the morning? If you have a pet, caring for them is part of getting ready for work, almost like a child. You now have no choice but to head straight home right after work instead of being able to do anything spontaneously. If, during the day, your dog never gets a 30min walk with any regularity and only goes out to pee you're probably an irresponsible dog owner. I feel bad if mine doesn't get at least 2 miles in a day because they basically just lay around all day staring at a wall otherwise.

Also, I feel like waking up, getting ready for work, and leaving the house as fast as you can is an unhealthy lifestyle choice. I like to make the first thing I do every day in my life about me and not my employer. Staying up an extra hour doesn't seem worth it to me.

2 miles is 3.22 km

I'm sure if you could picture your soul, it would be much more surreptitiously vulgar than the appearance of those you insult.

Some people care a lot about how they look. I personally really don't and half the time don't even look in the mirror before I leave the house, but others are very concerned with how they are seen by the people they associate with.

i stopped wearing makeup besides some light concealer application and mascara, I shower the night before and it takes me like fifteen minutes total to get out of the house for my 9-5 if I have my clothes picked out. Learning to love your face without makeup is the key to not spending 3 years in the bathroom

What she doesn't understand is that this IS her free time and shes spending it on makeup and wardrobe.

I disagree somewhat. I'm working full-time+, back in school full-time for another degree, and have a kid. I have nights open after my daughter's in bed, and weekends mostly open. I'm just finishing up rebuilding my deck from scratch, mostly done remodeling my kitchen, and getting ready to finish off my basement that I started before my health/new kid happened. We also hit the local park with friends, hang out and play D&D for a couple hours, and catch dinners with them. Some nights we just chill at home. It's not as much time as before school/kid, but really, not by a lot. And I'm far happier with my daughter.

Jeesus fuck dude you must get to sleep on time every night, have a ridiculous amount of energy, and somehow have the ability to not get burned out. Just reading all that makes me want an hour to myself to read a book alone

I get to sleep between 9pm and 10pm depending on homework during the week. No energy, mostly since I have a transplant, and had my colon recently removed. And burnout, well, it's not an option. Plus I really enjoy house projects, my family, and friends. Which kind of offsets it all.

It seems like you're pretty darn social and you get your emotional energy, or whatever the fuck you want to call it, from spending time with people you enjoy. That's super dope and I'm super jealous, I need to go to a quiet place and do nothing after I'm around people for too long or after I've been in a crowd. I dont think most people that burnout can just decide not to though, like freaking out so much you try to kill yourself isnt an option for life but that doesn't stop my panic attacks. I'm pretty jelly man, nice job, keep on keeping on

I am an introvert, I don't really do parties, so my requirements are pretty low for interaction. I feel the same as you. I sort of dread my graduation in two weeks, and I know I'll just want to get it done and go home. I have a family and people counting on me, things to do, and a future to think about. My drive is completing projects, and bettering myself. I've been in the same job for coming up on 10 years, I definitely know burnout. I dread coming to work. But it's simply not an option to stop :) Someone has to pay the mortgage, and buy food, etc.

After graduation, I am applying elsewhere. So hopefully that will eliminate some of that stress.

I know most can't just decide something isn't an option, but mastering that is essential. There's always better things ahead. I didn't let cancer or a transplant or a colon removal set me back. It just delayed what I wanted. We were later in buying a house, and later in having a kid, but they still happened. Especially now that it's spring, and lighter later, I go for bike rides at 7pm despite I'm tired, since it's the only time I have to exercise. It's about deciding what's important, and powering through to get it done. Hang in there, find something that makes you happy, and use that to drive other parts of your life.

If you don't mind me asking, what is your school/work schedule?

Work 7-4, but I live about 45m away from work, so it’s basically 6-5. School is one night a week for 4 hours, and it’s three classes at a time, 12cr hours.

I'm with you.

I wonder what these people are doing with their time...

But I do run a Life Efficiency Website, so maybe I'm just good at that. :P

I know you were joking (But its kind of the truth as well).

You can get some enjoyment while not having time to yourself though.

I enjoy immensely seeing my son play fotball now. Never miss a game. I used to not enjoy it because he was unmotivated, but now he has blossomed and loving it and that makes me happy to go to games to watch him. And its a nice socially with the other parents.

So as a dad of 3 with too little time to myself: Try to enjoy being with your kids. You`ll have to anyways.

I just started working full time, but I find its how you prioritize your time. Some evenings I get home from work, go the gym, make food and go to bed. But I try to make food for at least half a week ahead. That gives me time other nights to hang out with friends, go on dates, take a long ass walk (God I miss living closer to nature), play video games etc.

It's also about not wasting too much time on reddit, Instagram or YouTube like I used to do before. And on the weekends I basically only have to clean my apartment, which can be done pretty quickly if I get up early.

I've also tried being more efficient, now I'm at work within an hour of waking up. Sure it also helps that I get to pick my own working time (still have to do 40 hours/week), but having a life is doable for sure.

This!! It’s all about organization and time management.

It's also about not wasting too much time on reddit, Instagram or YouTube like I used to do before.

This! I know people who tell me all the time how busy and tired they are, but in the next breath will talk about the 15 shows they watch every week, the video games they play, they’re constantly on Facebook or instagram scrolling through pictures of strangers doing the things they ā€œdon’t have timeā€ to do.

If that’s how you prefer to spend your free time, that’s awesome. But it is free time. I spend downtime between clients on reddit. But I am fully aware that I could spend that time doing other things. I’m not too busy; I’ve made decisions about how I spend my time.

As for OP, those 2 days a week you’re currently in school will eventually be a real weekend once school is over. You won’t have to study in the evenings, you won’t have to drive to and from class, or attend class, or kill time between classes. Working full time and going to school at the same time is a lot, but it’s temporary - most adults don’t do that for more than a few years at a time. You can do a lot with two full uninterrupted days every week at your disposal. You won’t always be this busy. You’ll spend 8 hours a day sleeping, about 3 hours a day on daily maintenance (shower, cleaning, cooking, etc), and 40 hours a week at work. That gives you 51 hours every week for other stuff. More than a full work week of time to yourself, every week. Think of all the things you get done in a week at work, and remember that you have as much time not at work to do other stuff. It’s nobody’s ideal, but it’s plenty of time to have a life.

Yes, you have to learn to better manage your time and find ways to be more efficient. Even wearing a shirt or pair of slacks a time or two before throwing them in the hamper helps.

I’m with you on the meal prepping. When I first finished college, I was cooking almost every night and didn’t have time for much. These days I make a massive amount of something on a Saturday or Sunday afternoon and then eat it for dinner all week. Last night I went to a concert and had a blast. Today I came into work at 8am like usual.

Gotta get ahead of things. Get into a routine in which you don't have to spend your "free" time cleaning. Working a 40hr a week job isn't bad, but adding school into it makes it much more difficult to ration time. But like others have posted, not many people have the free time they portray to have on the social medias.

There’s also a trend amongst the younger generations to either stay single or have both spouses work—having a stay at home parent who can keep the house in order while the other works a job is more common with older generation, and probably helps keep either from feeling too overwhelmed (which isn’t to say being a stay at home parent or sole breadwinner isn’t stressful, but the responsibilities are at least a bit easier to keep track of).

Yeah, this is a big part of it. I stay at home (even though now she's 7 and my kid is in school all day) so that my husband's only job is his job. Obviously he helps out when he can, but any pressure for him to deal with finances, shop/cook/clean, plan family stuff, etc... is off the table.

Even if there are two working people in a relationship, those duties can be split, so I can definitely see how it would be overwhelming for OP to do school/work/all the rest while trying to have a social life.

Yep. Exactly. My SO works full time and a physically demanding job at that. I definitely am the one to keep the house clean, bills paid on time, 5 month daughter old taken care of, going to all her many appointments so he doesn't have to take off, shopping, cooking etc. I just think its only fair.

I don't want him to have to deal with all that stress on top of a hard job. The weekends are therefor spent doing stuff as a family and not cleaning house.

The reason it's a "trend" to have both parents working is because jobs don't pay enough to have a single earner household.

because jobs don't pay enough

Correct. minimum skill jobs don't pay enough. why should a minimally skilled job pay any more than a minimal wage? I shouldn't have to pay $1000 to do something simple just because someone else wants $1k for it.

Get some skills, and move out of minimally skilled positions. if ANYONE... literally anyone walking by can do your job, then there are virtually no specialized skills involved in that job and there is NO reason to pay a specialized wage.

There are plenty of carpenters, plumbers, pipe fitters, welders, mechanics, and other jobs that pay just fine to live (meaning not to live it up..... but to live).

but it is hard to get people to "lower themselves" to do 'hard' work instead of dream job activities.

Sure they do. Just not blue collar jobs. Also, they are saddled with student loan debt and/or people want to live in nicer areas and spend more on housing than they need to.

Blue collar jobs pay well on scale pay, especially if its dangerous (rigging) or something no one wants to do (like cleaning portapotties).

Edit: pay also depends on title and experience

Some do, but by the numbers, most don't. For every underwater welder or fire alarm contractor there are 20 cashiers, servers, retail workers, maids, and unskilled construction workers.

right. so get training. learn new skills. Better yourself. Anyone that expects a perfectly tailored job with great pay to jkust fall into their lap because they have some initials behind their name was lied to by the entire education system with an unrealistic promise of its worth.

Looks like it is time for some Mike Rowe wisdom in this thread....

I worked dead end button pushing in a tech company but was always trying to learn something new. I worked / conned my way into software development, did that a bunch, then taught myself SQL, and got SQL jobs. Then back into more development, and pretty soon I've worked my way out of dead end low wage and into comfortable software development with real career potential.

IF there is ambition to make something out of life, to do something, go somewhere ... then someone will. If there is no ambition... there is no will, and someone will not go anywhere.

Working a 40h week job isn't bad,

you lost me there

If you've ever worked 70+, a 40 hour week quite genuinely feels like nothing at all. It's weird.

I just started a 38 hour job down from 65 and I have so much spare time that I feel aimless

My last job I was pulling 50+ hours a week with only one day off. Now I’m down to 37.5 hours a week with two days off for the same salary and I feel like I have sooo much more time. With my last job I had an hour commute each way that sometimes extended to 1.5 hours due to transit. Now I work from home and have no commute. My free time has grown exponentially and like you, sometimes I kinda feel like I should be doing something.

Yeah I'm down from 6x11+ to 4x10

So not only do I have 2 full days extra now, but I also have more time on the actual days I do work too

It'll take some getting used to but it's definitely enjoyable like this either way

Next week I start a new shift and will be done work at 3pm every day. I love it because I will be able to actually enjoy the summer and do things after work, whereas my last job I wasn’t home until 7 - 7:30 and still had to make food and shit. Most nights I would just watch an episode or two on Netflix and call it a night.

Yeah I've had periods of working 90-100 hours a week for months on end and now I have a job where I work 40 hours a week.

I've got so much spare time it isn't funny.

And yet I constantly find myself thinking I could just work 3 13 hour days and have the rest of the week off, or 6 13 hour days in a row and then have 8 off in a row, this 5 day a week shit is the issue, makes it hard to ever go anywhere or tackle anything large despite having plenty of time.

I'd just do 2x19 if they let me tbh. Not even a joke

Well I'd do 40 straight, but I have to admit I wouldn't get much done after the first 20 hours or so.

Agreed. To keep up with my freelance work I had to work approximately 60 hours a week for shit pay. Recently did a massive career change and work 35-ish for about the same $$$. After a month, I told my best friend I feel like I’m on a paid vacation and have no idea what to do with myself.

So it's not bad relatively right? If you've ever worked a 0 hour week, a 40 hour week quite genuinely feels like a lot more than nothing at all. Americans work the most out of almost any other 1st world nation and saying that getting shot in the foot doesn't hurt that much because being shot in the balls hurts a lot worse isnt really true. It's just compared to being shot in the balls, being shot in the foot isnt that bad, but compared to not being shot at all being shot in the foot is terrible horrible pain

Yeah, I kinda said it was relative in my first sentence. 40 hours is a breeze if you're used to 70. I don't think I implied otherwise. 40 hours isn't gonna be easy for everyone

I used to work like 60-80 hour weeks and I still think a 40 hour week is a bitch. It's not the amount of work for me but the lack of free time and the monotony of it. Working more hours is usually easier for me because I turn on autopilot and dont have time to think about the lack of free time or much of anything else really

Unless you have a big commute, 9-5 isn't that much of your day if you think about it. Especially if you've actually experienced doing literally double that amount of hours.

It's still the bulk of the day but there's lots of time there that can be utilised

I hate this kind of counterpoint so much. ā€œI just lost one of my arms in an accident. It really sucks.ā€

ā€œOkay junior, I lost both of my arms back in the day. You should consider yourself lucky only losing one.ā€

Bad is bad no matter the magnitude.

Where do you live, that that is legal?

Pretty sure it's legal just about anywhere if you're willing to do it. I even know a couple of guys who basically work 5am to 10pm 6x a week on casual rates.

Non unionised construction is your go to place for fucked hours

I usually work between 50-60 hours a week (which is probably less than OP when you include school). I would LOVE to work just 40 hours.

If I get an 8 hour workday I’m blown away at how much time I have. Yesterday I got to work about 7:30 AM and left around 8:15 PM

This entire thread is depressing

I mean not to me, I work 40 hours and this thread makes me feel like a king. I'm playing shitloads of Zelda, I have a regular DND game, I'm having a good time

I have a very different job that I now regret taking, for multiple reasons.

My schedule is dependent on doctors, procedure times, how many patients need things done, etc. Essentially I show up usually between 7 and 8 AM and work until everything’s done.

Not totally, not Really. At least it reminds me that I'm not the only one.

I used to think that I am a workaholic. Now i know Im just driven.

There is a ton of pride with knowing EVERYTHING i have was EARNED, my free time is special and one day, it will pay off. Already see it happening.

I have three jobs. I might run three weeks without a day off. I do it for the people i love.

But the price is a pretty penny. I just want to get to a point where i can say.. It's ok. Everyone i care about has what they need and its okay to do me.

Every once in awhile, i stop and

Yea, it's so crazy how people have to work for a living. /s

40hrs a week starts looking much better if you've ever worked 60+ hours or had to work 2 jobs leaving you basically no time off.

16-21 was a constant grind of multiple jobs trying to keep bills paid for me.

I work 40 hours per week (8am-4pm) and feel very satisfied. I also take 2-hour language classes after work twice a week purely for my own personal growth. Honestly, I feel like I have plenty of free time to enjoy my hobbies (baking, reading, running, hiking, etc.) and hang out with my girlfriend.

Another perk is that teleworking is encouraged at my job, so I work from home every Friday. Some of my coworkers work remotely 3 days a week, and a few are full-time teleworkers who live across the country.

I am 100% okay with a 40 hour week. What I'm NOT okay with is working 5 days a week. I will work four 10 hour days no problem, but I dread working five.

You wouldn’t have survived in the late nineteenth-early twentieth century. Back then eighty hour work weeks were not uncommon.

Edit: added appropriate spacing

Just because it could be worse does not make it ok. I've done 80 hour weeks of physical shit and it's brutal.

I don't get your point. 80h weeks are stupid, it's a good thing they're gone. Do you comment only to make OP feel bad?

80hr weeks aren't too bad depending on where you are and what you're doing. I've done sunrise to sundown on a farm and that was pretty chill tbh even though it was probably 100+ hours but there's no major rush.

Doing 80 hours in any job near a city would break even the toughest of people pretty quickly

An American investment banker was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked.Ā  Inside the small boat were several large yellowfin tuna.Ā  The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them.

The Mexican replied, ā€œonly a little while. The American then asked why didn’t he stay out longer and catch more fish? The Mexican said he had enough to support his family’s immediate needs. The American then asked, ā€œbut what do you do with the rest of your time?ā€

The Mexican fisherman said, ā€œI sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siestas with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine, and play guitar with my amigos.Ā  I have a full and busy life.ā€ The American scoffed, ā€œI am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat. With the proceeds from the bigger boat, you could buy several boats, eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the processor, eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing, and distribution. You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Mexico City, then LA and eventually New York City, where you will run your expanding enterprise.ā€

The Mexican fisherman asked, ā€œBut, how long will this all take?ā€

To which the American replied, ā€œ15 – 20 years.ā€

ā€œBut what then?ā€ Asked the Mexican.

The American laughed and said, ā€œThat’s the best part.Ā  When the time is right you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich, you would make millions!ā€

ā€œMillions – then what?ā€

The American said, ā€œThen you would retire.Ā  Move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siestas with your wife, stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play your guitar with your amigos.ā€

This should be higher up. My partner isn’t from the US, and whenever she sees my workaholic tendencies, she can’t relate. You don’t live to work where she’s from, and being with her has really helped me slow down and enjoy life. If I’m not prioritizing making a six digit salary, then so what? We work hard but have enough to enjoy the day to day. I wish that was accessible for everyone in the US. It beats the hell out of the grind and watching your best years fly by.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anekdote_zur_Senkung_der_Arbeitsmoral

Anekdote zur Senkung der Arbeitsmoral

"Anekdote zur Senkung der Arbeitsmoral" ("Anecdote concerning the Lowering of Productivity" in Leila Vennewitz' translation) is a short story by Heinrich Bƶll about an encounter between an enterprising tourist and a small fisherman, in which the tourist suggests how the fisherman can improve his life. It was written for a May Day programme on the Norddeutscher Rundfunk in 1963, and is considered one of the best stories written by Heinrich Bƶll.


^[ ^PM ^| ^Exclude ^me ^| ^Exclude ^from ^subreddit ^| ^FAQ ^/ ^Information ^| ^Source ^] ^Downvote ^to ^remove ^| ^v0.28

TY for posting that

This deserves gold but i am poor. Here you go have this instead šŸ„‡..

ĀæPorque no los dos?

Love it too.. But it isn't exactly America reality when you dont have an MBA in law or likewise. The american way is pay up or shut up. Gets expensive.

It sounds like you have a lot on your plate. I think many people who work full-time are not going to school, so they don't have to spend time going to class, studying for an exam at night, writing a paper during the weekend, etc. When they leave work (unless they have a second job, or take work home with them), their time is theirs to do as they please.

Also r/LifeAfterSchool

I’ve found a lot of it is about time management and some personal sacrifice. I was privileged with being able to do what I love, and tattoo full time. I only have to work 4 days a week which gives me some freedom, but my days off I used to have to spend just drawing for those days of appointments. I’ve sort of changed my life around work, I’ve sacrificed a bit by sleeping shorter hours so that I can spend more time each night doing something I actually enjoy. I’ve dedicated one of my 3 days off to drawing for the whole week, one day off I spend on my hobby/side business of candlemaking, and the last day is purely to relax. I find an hour or two on each of those days to do my cleaning and such. Everything’s not perfect, my clean laundry sits in the dryer, garbage accumulates for a day or two until my next day off..but if you time everything out right, you can manage a lot more than you thought you seemed capable!

So far I'm getting a vibe that people are heavily denying themselves on a physical and mental front. I have nearly a full time schedule in an entry level job, I am not paid enough to support myself, I live close to where I work, and don't need much to prepare for it. There is hardly enough time to reasonably do things. Not to sound like that guy, but being "productive" and "efficient" simply implies that you give yourself the possibility of having a few stress free hours in a week.

"You'll get used to it" or "that's normal" is definitely why Americans work longer hours for less pay. Our society demands we function more effectively so others don't have to, I was part of the less functioning part as it was, it only makes how blatantly fucked up peoples situations are all the more obvious.

I hope you are going to go far, because your hard work and dedication deserves it, I hope I can maybe get myself together to go further too.

It’s bootstrap bullshit at its finest.

So assuming you get 8 hours of sleep a night(56 hours of your week in total) and you work 40 hours a week. Throwing in 4 hours for commuting and other things caused by work. And you have spent 100 out of your 168 hours of your week. Leaving 68 hours to do with as you please

I don’t understand how you don’t have time. Assuming it’s a full time during the week job, you have the whole weekend plus after work, which is maybe 5/6ish. Then you’ve got every evening plus weekends. I don’t understand how people say they don’t have time.

...you live close to work, and don't even work full time, and say you don't have time to do things? What do you do when you aren't at work? Even if working/commute/getting ready takes 9 hours every day, and you sleep for 8 hours, that is still giving you SEVEN HOURS of time PER DAY to do whatever you want.

And why are you working a job that you can't support yourself with the income?

You either get really good at managing your time, or you go insane. Once upon a time 80 hours was a short week for me, plus I found time for my MMO addiction, the girlfriend who eventually became my wife, hanging out with friends, and the occasional jam session with musician buddies. Even then I sometimes found myself getting bored, but that's because if you absolutely have to be gogogogogo all the time then once you stop you have no idea what to do.

Fortunately those days are long behind me. It was an unhealthy lifestyle that was slowly killing me.

My 80 hour week is slowly killing me too 😭 this post made me so sad because I’ve been really wanting to change my life and find myself again. It’s been gogogogogo for 3 years and I’m exhausted!!! This is not what living looks like for me. Smh. Luckily I’m graduating (finally) next week and I’ll get a break before I start working 80 hours again šŸ˜­šŸ’€.

Idk if you live in america, (maybe you dont) but there is a simple plan to a great life with tons of money and free time. 1. Get a cdl, or welding cerification (takes like 1 semester) 2. Move out the city to a town with less than 10,000 people 3. Get a job in maintenance, truck driving, or welding 4. Live the life while making 12-20 bucks an hour woth tons of free time and disposable income

Works in every state but california or alaska

combine activites if possible. listen to lecture on audio while cleaning or while commuting. I've just started back into combining my commute with listening to bible sermons on a podcast from John Macarthur so that I can get back to working on my mental well being. Which is also having beneficial impacts on my family relationship also.

Yeah I definitely listen to audiobooks while I’m driving and love it!!

That gogogogogogogo part is so true. I work my ass of all week but I was home being sick two days ago and I felt so fucking useless I just began cleaning. I dream about playing videogames all day at work and then when I get a day off I play for 2 hours and I can't play one minute more. Pretty crazy actually

I honestly feel really privelaged liveing in rural america. I literally dont know anyone who works 80 hours just to make ends meet. Rent is like 400 bucks a month out here. You could work minimum wage (9.50 in my state) for 30 hours a week part time and after rent and utilities you still have 300 bucks to eat and spend on whatever you want. If you have a full time job, even at minimum wage you can afford a 2 bedroom apartment. I have a full time job that pays 16 dollars an hour and im living like a care free boomer at 22.

Yeah the rural life is where it's at. My mortgage on a fantastic house with a sizable plot of land is less than my rent was on a shitty shotgun apartment with a roommate.

The 80 hour weeks weren't just for making ends meet, though. I had just gotten my first Chef de Cuisine gig, and in the culinary industry "paying your dues" usually includes spending a decade working at a level that will shave another two decades off your life expectancy.

Fortunately that world is behind me. Once my youngest is in school I'm going back to college to get my Master's. I've always been passionate about engineering and the aerospace industry has a huge presence here.

OP... You are still going to school, which means that you are spending a lot of time studying. People who work a full time job do not study in their spare time. Also, you spend 2 hours getting ready in the morning? You need to cut down on that. I spend about 30 minutes getting ready, and I have a 2 yo to care of as well. You need to start prioritizing your free time a lot more, OP.

No one does, and it keeps getting worse. A few people will disagree and say how wonderful their lives are, and that's cool, more power to them. But, the vast majority of people don't have an active social life, it's mostly a myth.

Saw a guy say similar things as op on some cnn article on fb, and he got absolutely blasted by people being proud of working 60, 70, even 80 hours a week. It’s insane

Having worked a couple of jobs that have those hours, it's a bit of a cult sorta deal. People start to try and do more hours than each other, people brag about how much work they've done and how enormous their timesheets are. Others will sacrifice their days to do something, so a 10 hour shift becomes an 18 hour one and then the next day it's all they talk about.

It's not exactly what i would call pride, it's more of a "look how tough I am that I can do all these hours" thing.

Also at one job I had I accidentally set a ridiculously high bar by often doing something like 108 hours in 8 days (not even because I had anything to prove) and then people wanted to outdo me.

All those guys have trapped themselves in that job too because now they don't have any spare time to even consider leaving the joint

My boss loved it. He just sat back and watched us all shoot ourselves in the feet to show off to each other.

[deleted]

Yep pretty much. Watching someone brag about their huge hours to someone who works 38 a week who responds with "why the fuck would you do that to yourself?" is a little bit funny

It's hard work to rationalise slaving away during your prime years. A big game of denial and groupthink.

People I work with go on vacation and still end up pushing things to our repos...

When I take a vacation, I forget I have a job.

My friend who consistently works 80-90 hour weeks still ended up catching up on work emails every night of his freaking honeymoon, he couldn't even escape work then. Was at a bachelor party (spent a weekend in Park City) recently and he was up at 6 every morning that weekend doing work in a cafe, taking conference calls, etc. We went for drinks at a cafe on Saturday afternoon and he was on the phone the entire time. It's insanity.

It’s sad, I was always told I could ā€œbe anything/ do anything I wantedā€ when I grew up like there was total creative freedom, but I guess that was a lie.

You can be anything you want that you're good at, and it's a hell of a lot harder than anyone could've imagined for like 99% of people.

Doing what you're good at doesn't necessarily mean you're going to be doing what will make you happy. I'm now happier working a job outside my specialty simply because it gives me more freetime.

You can in theory. But it usually sucks in the process and you eventually find out you don’t really want to do that. Worse is when you find out you aren’t very good at it and you see your competitors are miles better than you.

That is a total lie. This glorified idea of ā€œbe anything you wanna beā€ is great until you realize that all it’s asking you to do is to spend your life producing labor and value for a capitalist structure where the top eats most of the profit( I’ve been in that top, believe me no one there treats that notion seriously). It’s a way to extract value ie monetary value eventually from an organization that is built quite directly on eating peoples time and labor and paying them whatever is the lowest cost they can get away with. You can actually be whatever you wanna be but you have to start thinking outside the confines of ā€œdegreeā€, ā€œemploymentā€ and ā€œcareerā€.

Yes it was a massive capitalist lie

It’s because our generation got screwed. Now that everything is stupid expensive, few jobs that pay well enough to live on and if you want a better wage, you have to spend 40-100k+ just for a chance to get that. And afterwards, you have to pay that off. If you end up getting a normal wage job, you will need to max your hours out to pay personal bills alone, just to survive. Then spend more money on the schooling you paid for. It’s basically an endless cycle. You want money, you gotta spend money for a chance to make more money. Over time, that same job might need more ā€œeducationā€ (aka:A larger degree) to get hired. So you work a regular wage job to pay for it while you are going. But takes 10 years to do that. And the cycle repeats.

Not in all cases but a lot of them have this issue. Now, a lot of people just want to work and live comfortably. But that means working as much as possible these days. But the upside is that you won’t be over 100k in debt.

You can be/do anything you want as long as someone wants to buy the result of your labour, innit.

It's not so much a lie as it is a subtle Launchpad of sorts. It's supposed to get your mind working so that in those moments where most people would veg out in front of the TV, you might take up whittling or painting or soap carving.

School is your biggest detractor here. I work more than a 40-hr week, full shifts 6 days a week, but I still have plenty of free time that I mostly waste on video games. The biggest change to my life between now and when I WAS going to school and had a shitty job: my current job has stable hours. I work my shift, I can plan for my shift. My work respects me enough that if they need me to work outside of my shift, it's a request and not an order. If I tell them I'm busy for that day, they drop it without a second question.

Previously, I had a job that could call me in with a handful hours notice, outside of the firm hours I set for school. That shit was insane and left me with no ability to plan for things, and the only me-time was playing small phone games on the bus while listening to music.

Finish up with school, then find a stable-schedule job, and you'll have free time.

My advice would be to not set the bar that high. Because that's literally infinite at this point.

Find what you do think you would like to do and do a few years of it. And then a few more. And then if you want to do something else you still have decades to sort that out for yourself.

That's capitalism

You can be/do anything, but that doesn’t mean it comes without a cost. People rarely follow their dream or get to the top of their game without hard work and a lot of sacrifice. You just have to decide what’s most important, and make it a priority.

I feel you OP I've been thinking the same thing. I work 40 hours a week after graduating college a few years ago, and it sucks how little time we genuinely have to ourselves.

I wake up, get ready, go to wrk, come home, make dinner, study or read, shower, then go to bed. Then rinse repeat. The solution I've found is most weekends I try to make specific plans--not like some depressing itinerary, but at least know I want to go on a day trip to x place, or check out y museum, or stay in and bake z recipe. It makes me feel like my weekends are more productive, but it's nice to balance that with the occasional super lazy weekend with nooo plans.

I also don't shelve chores for the weekend. It sucks, but I usually try to do laundry or vacuum or other small things while making dinner (that is if it's something you can walk away from for a few minutes--the other day I made risotto and you have to stand over it the entire time :/ ). It ensures those things are getting done throughout the week instead of piling up on Sunday.

Yes it can be exhausting, but I'm 25 and I'm trying to get used to it now because eventually I want to have kids and Jesus Christ I'm sure it's even more difficult.

Ultimately though you have more on your plate than those not going to school. Once you finish you will only have one job, not two. Your work load may go down a bit, but there are other challenges to it. But you seem to do a damn good job of juggling both now--just think how prepared you'll be once you finish your schooling! Sounds like you're doing more than many of us are

ā€œbe anything/ do anything I wantedā€

yeah that honestly is a lie. You CAN.... but you have to fight for it and want it more than anything else in life. Want to be a startup CEO? Well that will suck all your time. Be ready for 70hr weeks.

The problem lies in wantign EVERYTHING. Great family life balance. Great career. Great house / apartment. Great hobby.

Something has to give. You can't have everythign in life.

For me..... I gave up on health. I don't have time to be physically fit like I was. I also gave up on career for a while to focus on family. Now that I'm mostly not a total screw up as a partner / parent.... I'm startign to ease back into the career end of things.

It’s true your social life is less as an adult out of school. But if it’s something important to you, it will just take a little more preparation. You have to schedule outings and visits with friends. And if you or they have kids it will be even harder.

Right?

I work 60 hours (six days a week) and there is no downtime, ever. But it's what I need to do to provide.

My 'spare' time is laundry, housework, groceries, etc.

Being an adult to me means doing what needs to be done.

But, the vast majority of people don't have an active social life, it's mostly a myth.

I disagree and I think this is an unfortunate way to live. One thing I see a pattern of is that people who are less social rarely or never make the plans themselves, they wait for someone else to plan something or an invite to drop in their lap (this was me for many years!). In order to be social you also need to take the initiative: send a group text to get together for a meal, or make a Facebook status gathering folks for an event you want to go to. Hit up your friends when you have a night with no plans for something small like a walk or visiting an animal shelter or playing video games. If you don't know that many people join a club, or attend a board game night, or volunteer. MAKE time! I'm at the office 9 hours M-F and still have an active social life, and know plenty of people who live the same way. It's entirely possible but difficult when folks have an attitude of defeat already and don't make an effort.

If anyone reads this and say to yourself that you never feel motivation, or aren't in a good enough mood, or don't have enough energy to socialize: talk to your doctor or see a therapist. You deserve to enjoy life. :)

It's because you're in college too. Once you're just working you'll have more free time because you won't have class/studying.

I know there are some people who wake up early and work out or do errands before work. I have never been able to pull that off.

For me, after work, I do house chores and get the kids to bed, then I shower and watch a little TV or a movie. I get big errands done on Saturday or Sunday, and then the other weekend day is more for doing activities with the kids, friends, or relaxing at the house.

You pretty much described my exact schedule

It will come, hard work does pay off but you need to have patience. Everything we see on social media or tv forgets to mention that most people have been fortunate enough to be given wealth, or have done the hard work part and now have a career that allows them a good salary and free time. But in order to get there you do have to work for it.

[deleted]

Not with that attitude it won’t, believe in yourself and work for it.

[deleted]

I recognize it but realistically what are you going to do that will successfully bring you happiness and financial freedom? Unless we are the lucky 1%ers we won’t ever feel the means of massive wealth. However you can make something for yourself and love a comfortable lifestyle. Whining and pretending to be woke isn’t going to do anything for you. If we can make a change, awesome, otherwise your not going to do much about it.

And even if you do have the time, do you even have the energy? Working full time is exhausting! Even at a sit-down job.

[deleted]

I think if you choose sleep and social life you won’t be able to do both of them very well for too long.

True on some days I only sleep 3h, but some how it's not that bad for me.

Oh Trust me it is

Maybe but I also learned that my sweet spot of sleep is 6 hours everything above makes me feel tired and even worse than 4h of sleep.

Work + sleep for the weekdays, social life + sleep for the weekend

I got an hour of sleep last night. Also, have no friends.

Most adult don’t also go to school so there’s 2 days they can do things.

Also, you make time for things.

Also annual leave and bank holidays.

Also cough sick days...

Also a job closer to home to cut down travelling time eating into your free time

Also you get used to it

Also life is shit

I had a full time office job (40 hrs) and a part time bartending job (20 hrs) while in school full time for a double major honours science degree. It was awful and I never slept and barely saw my friends, but you get through it. Working just one full time job after that felt like nothing.

And here I am whining about my bachelors! That’s crazy. I almost don’t believe these stories when I hear them, you sound very hardworking. I hate thinking about the damage to your health with the lack of sleep/stress

Well if it makes you feel any better I’m retiring this year and moving to the south of France, I just bought a big old house and I’m opening a bed and breakfast. One thing I definitely realized while killing myself working that hard is that I had no interest in living like that.

Good luck! That sounds like a wonderful plan. I'd happily give you business when I finally make a trip to the south of France.

One thing I definitely realized while killing myself working that hard is that I had no interest in living like that.

some times it takes screwing up or takign the wrong path for a while before we learn.

What was your GPA cuz honestly I don’t believe for a second that you did well in a science major while working 60 hours a week. I was desperately trying to get less hours so I could study more, and I usually worked less than 15. I had zero social life and dedicated all my free time to study. Definitely feels your account is slightly embellished. That, or I’m doing something wrong lol

How full of yourself do you have to be to insist that no one could possibly be working more than you or be busier than you are? Grow up. I’m sure there are people in school right now who work even more than I did. Just because you can’t do it doesn’t mean everyone who can is lying.

His reply wasn't even negative, but yours was. You didn't even answer what he asked, just straight to the projection and insults. What's the reason for that if your claims aren't made up?

You read their post so wrong. They weren’t attacking you. Read it as a positive again.

You missed my point, created a strawman, and started insulting me, getting hyper-defensive. You should relax, maybe take some time off.

Your whining is valid. Just because he's done that crazy shit, doesn't mean you're struggling any less than you do.

Yes! Hate the Suffering Olympics. If I’m not chipper enough around family it’s a big deal as to why, and can’t say I’m tired because OH YOU DONT EVEN HAVE KIDS! Okay, you’re a full time parent and I’m a student with a job, totally different things. We can both be tired lmao.

Hold on... If being full time, you were doing at least 12 credits at a time, and the number of credits is roughly similar to the number of hours in class a week (that's how it works at my university), then that's 72 hrs a week, assuming you don't do any studying or homework outside of class. Add to that 5 hrs of sleep and that's 107 hours a week. But you were a double major, so let's boost that to 16 credits, that's 111 hours, and 118 if you study / do homework for 1 hour a day. That gives you 7 hours a day to eat, clean, get enough sleep, actually do significant amounts of homework a day, or, maybe, do something for fun. You're reaching that 168 hrs/wk limit way pretty quickly.

That’s not how the credit system worked at my school (I’m not American) but ~10-12/hrs wk in class sounds right on average, depending which classes I was in that semester. A double major at my school didn’t mean more classes at once, it meant that more of my classes were specific ones to earn certain degrees, so I had pretty much all science classes and no electives. I put as many classes in the evenings as I could, and my boss during the day at my office job let me use my lunch breaks to leave and go to daytime classes and make up the hours after work. Working 10 hour bar tending shifts Saturday evenings and 2 5-hour shifts during the week, that left me Saturday mornings, all day Sunday, and 3 weekday evenings for homework and studying, plus the lunch breaks that I didn’t have class. Like I said, it was awful, I barely slept and never saw my friends, but I got through it.

Why would you do that though? Did it give you a competitive edge or set you up in a way that made if worth it?

I’m an RN and work 3-12 hour shifts a week with 4 days off. They are physically and mentally exhausting days but so worth it for the schedule!

I beat my head against a wall for a few years before getting my life sorted. It isn't easy, but if you enjoy your work then it doesn't feel like that. I would rather be working most of the time than not haha.

I love when people say, "do something you love, and you'll never work a day in your life". That is so incredibly rare. If you can, find a vocation that is different every day. Variety in your day helps a lot. That being said, I do 40-50 hrs a week, wife and 5 kids, and a dog. Love playing ps4 games and woodworking projects. Life is all about balance. Games aren't as important as kids, but I like using them to unwind. Make time for priorities, and make those priorities of utmost importance. Money makes living life easier, but it is true, you don't hear about anyone on their death bed wishing they could have spent more time at the office.

Yeah that expression gets under my skin. It should go something like ā€œdo something for money that feels halfway tolerable and sometimes engaging.ā€

r/Antiwork

Holy hell talk about a conspiracy theorist sub, reading those comments are so cringey

It's all about prioritizing the things in your life that you want. There are 24 hours in every day. Even if work/prep/driving/sleeping is 16-18 hours a day you still have 6-8 hours of time. It comes down to planning, forethought and efficient use of your time.

Like others have mentioned, get into a routine and work on streamlining it. Laundry, cleaning and other misc. tasks take at most 15 mins a day if you actually stay on top of it every day. Grocery shopping and getting gas take 5-10 mins on your way to/from work 1-2 days a week.

Track your time, how much time do you spend on reddit or watching tv or just on your phone? Can you be using that time doing something else that you actually enjoy?

Sure, working 40+ hours a week is a large portion of your time, but it's not all of it.

Your advice is ok, but your time frames are WAY off! I could spend 30 minutes folding one large load of laundry (we have small kids). Grocery shopping also takes more than 5 minutes—I could stand in line for 5 minutes!

That's fair, but OP doesn't have kids and neither do I. It's my wife, dog and I. And I said 5-15 mins for gas and/or shopping. I stop at the store on my way to or from work three times a week when I know it's not busy and have a list ready. I can get protein, fresh veggies and fruit and whatever else in 15 minutes every time. We also do a Costco run maybe once a month for the bulk stuff. So to me, because I'm already on the road, there is no apparent time cost. With laundry I do probably 1.5 loads a week. One for work stuff, I work in construction, and one every other week for non-work clothes. Takes all of 2 minutes to start a load, 30 seconds to move to the dryer and then I spend less than 5 mins a day putting stuff away over the week. Sure it could take 30 mins I suppose but I hate spending long periods of time doing housework so I dedicate a small amount of time every day and it works for me

People don't like to hear it but being "always busy" is almost always

1) a choice

2) poor planning.

and people don't think it's a choice. They think, "but what would happen if I didn't do the thing." I don't know. Don't do the thing and see what happens.

really, most people are scared of and don't appreciate leisure, so they keep themselves busy to avoid it. which is fine, but don't complain about it.

Yes, we all get busy. If your DEFAULT daily status is busy, it's on you.

Absolute bullshit

You get used to it, I couldn't stand full time work with the amount of down time I had after I clocked off, now I'm doing an MBA while working full time and still find time to myself. You get use to time management, you kind of have to

You come home, and you don't think about work. Do whatever works for you. Cook dinner, gym, watch a movie, whatever. If you can switch off as soon as you leave work, you feel like you have more time.

I dont have time for anything else.. i work all day.. i have half an hour to my self in the mornings if im very lucky. And when i get home i have 3 to 4 hours for dinner, shower, any random chores and spending time with my baby and wife. The weekends are pretty much all chores or taking care of my son. I feel a little numb to most things these days.. my son's the only thing that makes me happy.. i used to play the bass.. not anymore

You currently work a full time job and study at the weekends so how would expect have free time.

I'm 24, graduated and have been working as an engineer for 3 years. I work Mon-Fri 9-6.

If I want to, I can do something every evening and have my whole weekend to enjoy and actually have money to enjoy it.

25 days holiday + bank holidays means I could have a long weekend almost every weekend if I wanted to.

I think it's pretty decent being young and working full time. I have way more quality free time than when I was at uni.

You are not here to live serf, you are here to work.

Best comment out here

someone who feels the same way as me - i thought i was the only one! i’ll admit i don’t have nearly as busy a schedule as yours, and i’m still in full time education (high school) but even now i’m struggling to catch up.

i hate how my success is defined by my grades which are literally just numbers on a piece of paper. like sure, grades ARE kinda important for some things, but at this point it feels like the only reason i go to school is to achieve the highest test scores possible, to the point where actually learning stuff isn’t even important anymore.

i think as long as i have a career i enjoy and/or feel passionate about (like a musician, human rights lawyer, etc.) i’ll be ok later in life. sending you internet hugs šŸ’•

This is on purpose, at least in the us, from policies, bills, etc that are created from lobbying by the rich. The design is to drain the most work and money from each person.

So, to do this you first make claims that you won't hire anyone without a degree forcing people to go in debt. Now they are in debt and are more likely to work for less money, more hours, less vacation, less benefits. Next, you push agendas and policies to keep them in debt like "buy a house and have kids or you are a failure". Stop them from organizing, take away workers rights, etc.

It is capitalist design.

I dodged buying or renting a house, partially dodged going in debt for school, still managed to go in debt but it's under 20k and I have over 20k in savings. I redesigned my tiny apartment to be a efficient as possible, but it still takes a full day of to recooperate from 13 hour work days, 1 hour of driving, finish all the chores, buy groceries, etc. I am also working on creating video games but it's a slow process with average amount of time available at 10 hours or less per week. So you view it as a hobby that might make money in the future. this entrepreneurship has also been dragged through the mud by the same lobbying. So, it's even more difficult now.

I'm in my 40s, by the way.

Yeah, it's a rough future if you don't get really lucky, or vote the right people in office.

People who come in here and tell you to suck it up or look at it differently are the enemy. And all these people posting how you can do it, then explaining how they do it, are also not helping the situation. They are the lucky ones that clearly do not understand your situation, ignore them.

the worst part is waking up to the knowledge that you know you can be free but arent, that life is short and we're toiling away doing the same thing everyday, i mean it works if youre doing what you really want but in reality if you want to just have a simple life one with little responsiblity where you can come and go on your on whim, its not possible! we are a society driven and run by money so there isnt any room for anything else and whats worse not having time to come up with your own things not being able to let your creativity flow because at the end of the day youre burnt out by all the work youve been doing the best leisure is to just turn on the teli and lay back, sad really.

Not sure. I think some sacrifice sleep.

I’m a single mom I have two kids and run a full time business by myself and I’m starting school this summer. You make time and sacrifice where you can.

I have a colleague who is in similar straits, and I told her 'as a married parent, I don't understand how you do it as a single mom'. She told me 'when you have to do it, you find a way'.

[deleted]

This is Reddit, most users on here are teenagers or 20 somethings that want you to tell them you can get drunk, smoke weed, and play video games all day and somehow retire early.

Limits, boundaries, social sacrifice, time management, priorities...these mean nothing to a Redditor.

Most people have about 7 hours per day of free time. So that makes it 49 hours per week to watch GOT, go to grandmas house, or out with friends.

You are in school AND work a full time job? No shit you have like an hour or two or "free time".

8 hours of work, 7-8 hours of sleep. 30 minutes to get ready in the morning, 15 minutes to get to work and another 15 to get back home back. 1 hour for lunch/dinner (I usually skip breakfast).

Leaves me with 6-7 hours a day of free time each day plus the week-end. Enough to be part of a "hardcore" top 200 world of warcraft guild for a while, although I found more productive hobbies now.

The people in this thread claiming that you can't have a social life and a full time job are just wrong.

Thats capitalism. It alienates you from your time so that you cant really do anything other than work and produce money. People with spare time are dangerous to corporations.

Ugh i HATE this stupid conspiracy theory bullshit. A corporation doesn't give a shit about how much or how little free time you have. If anything they want you to have more free time because more free time means you will probably by more of their crap.

Dude, just look at the usual work hours of the population, and you can see that thats not true. Did you checked the work hours in the early industrial era? Before unions were a rhing? It's not a conspiracy theory, it's a theory that come from sociological works.

[deleted]

This reality, working 10+ hours every day, even on weekends + a 2.5hr commute daily to work and trying to get another degree to become a teacher is wat got me to eventually burn out in just over half a year's time. It's unbearable! Making good money and driving a fancy company car won't make you happy. It's what you do in between earning that stuff that matters it seems to me. It's no use earning a lot when you have 0 time to work on yourself and hobbies. I'd consult some kind of professional about this tbh.

Learn to say no, and try cleaning for 10 minutes (with a stopwatch) every day and you'd be surprised on what you get done. This might give you some more free time on the weekends to do stuff you like

I see this all the one all the time;

Sleep, money, or time: you can only pick two.

You always need money

And OP also wants to pick school as a 4th option

I imagine people with well-established careers have a lot more control over when they can take time off, and for how long.

Finish school, it Will be Worth it

People who work 9-5s and are satisfied with their job are mega rare. I've always had to sacrifice some aspect of my life; shit work schedule and soul sucking job, but I'd have some free time. Job I really enjoyed, but extremely long days away from friends and loved ones. High paying job, but really weird shifts, and not what I want to be doing.

A good friend of mine put it well - it's all about priorities. What are your priorities right now? Do you want to be working towards a satisfying career, or work a mediocre job which allows you to hang out a lot of the time. Right now I'm sacrificing being able to hang out with everyone I want to hang out with in order to pay off debts, whole slowly working towards a fulfilling career which will be better paying and hopefully not the worst hours.

I work minimum 300 hours / month (380 hours was the most I've worked in a month after a break up).

  • I go to the gym 3 times a week (2-3 hours each time).

  • I take piano and violin lessons and I'm about to start taking tango lessons.

  • I spend a lot of time reading things I enjoy and also writing stuff on Quora and other forums.

  • I fly abroad for a weekend every 2-3 months for a short holiday (different countries in Europe).

  • I'm studying for a management diploma online from ILM and other few things.

  • I always keep in touch with people I care about, visiting or calling them regularly.

  • I'm a serial dater. I try and go on a different date every weekend.

Sometimes I'm bored and have nothing to do, so I'm either learning a new language, or I have a few hours of sleep in the day time. So far I speak 4 languages + BSL and Braille. I've started to learn English 5 years ago.

It's all about planning your time in advance and setting priorities. I wake up every day at 7:30 AM, despite if I'm working or not, if I've slept for an hour or ten. I make the most of my time.

I have no children, no girlfriend. I don't like alcohol so I'm always at my 100% because there is no hangover.

I don't need to worry about cleaning as I keep everything clean. I put my clothes to wash while I'm having dinner and I put them to dry after I finished my dinner. I fold them and put them away next morning as part of my "making coffee" routine.

Sometimes I'm tempted to take a part time job as well, this is why I have qualified as a: - masseur - CNC operator - forklift driver - trainer / teacher - recruitment consultant.

I'm currently studying for some more qualifications in different fields. I'll probably never going to take a part time job, but the idea of knowing how to do / being qualified in different things, turns me on.

If you get a job with good benefits, then each year you get a little more time off. Use those wisely and you can get quite a few three day weekends plus your vacation.

Also, if you can swing it do 4 ten hour days instead of 5 eights. That's the best shit ever.

Honestly, I don’t feel that way at all. I work anywhere from 50-70 hrs a week and still manage to have toys and hobbies on the weekends . I think school and work is a lot at once though. I never did that. I think it’s a lot easier when you’re just trying to balance 2 things rather than 3 though. It does get better after school to be honest

Your school takes up a lot of time and brain energy. Most jobs don’t have homework either. My jobs have always been the kind that I can forget about on the way home.

If you work 8-5 M-F, you have closer to 53 hours before you work again, if you’re going to bed at 10p on Sunday.

When I was doing call center work, I my grocery shopping on the way home from work one night a week. I did my laundry on Monday nights while I watched TV. Any additional errands I did during the day on Saturday or Sunday.

My best schedule I ever had was working 10-10 M-Th. I ate dinner at work, crashed as soon as I got home, got up around 7 and had time to go for a walk or run an errand in the morning before work.

The best part was that Thursday night was my Friday, so I could just chill on my own or with a friend who was free.

On Fridays, I did my laundry and cleaned up around the apartment. Since it was a week day I could also do things other people don’t get to do like schedule doctor’s appointments or go to the bank in the middle of the day. And then, I was free whenever friends were ready to have fun after they got done with work. I also then could do whatever I wanted to do on Saturday and Sunday.

I really thought school was a bigger pain in the butt because I was always having to work on a project or something was always hanging over me the whole semester.

I love that rush at the end of the day when you’re done and don’t have to do any homework!

If you get married live a life that can be supported by a single income. Don’t fall into the trap of both working to support things you don’t need. Then it’s tag team. One of your works and the other takes care of them home. Then when work is done, and on the weekends, you have plenty of time to play.

Life is expensive and messy and it has to be paid for and cleaned. Two hands make lighter work. Every creature has to do work to survive.

I’ve thought about this too. I recently got back into 40 hours a week and I moved in with my boyfriend an hour away from where I worked. I had two jobs until last week. I was seeing my family maybe a few hours every few days if I was lucky and I saw my best friend once every 2 weeks. It sucks that this is normal in America

I work somewhere between 50 and 55 hours a week in an office. I have an active social life and an active, time consuming hobby.

I start early, and I save time when I can. I get to work at 7 so that I can leave as close to 5 as possible. My morning routine includes showering, making breakfast that I can eat in the car, and getting out the door. I don't wear makeup and I keep my hair cut in style that requires little to no labor (meaning it's usually still wet when I get in the car, then I run my fingers through it/shake it out before I walk into the office). It takes me 40 minutes to get from alarm to turning on the car. I'm in upper-middle management and make nearly six figures in a moderate-income part of the US; I'm above average for my location. Not a humble brag, just giving you some perspective.

My hobby is horseback riding, and I get to the barn 4-5 times a week. I'm usually there for 1-2 hours, depending on the rest of my schedule for the evening; if I've got a thing (like grocery shopping), I'll spend the bare minimum time prepping and only ride for 20 minutes before cleaning up and leaving. My barn is located between my job and my house, so stopping right after work makes sense and fits into my commute without adding too much extra time. I usually go out with my SO one "school" night every week - that's a day I skip going to the barn. I always go out Friday nights either with the SO or with a friend. Saturdays likewise are a dedicated "hanging out" day: I sleep in, usually hit the barn for a couple of hours, then get together with a group of friends or go on an urban exploration hike with the boyfriend, or hit the pool. We usually stay out late, either on a date or playing games with friends. Sundays are my dedicated "family" day, at least every other weekend (if not more often) I go to dinner at my parent's house and play with my 6 nieces and nephews.

I love my hobbies, I love my family, I love my friends. In order to maximize the amount of time I have to spend with them, I work as efficiently as possible. I clean as I go, so I never have to dedicate a lot of time to it. Wash dishes as I use them, wipe down counters whenever I'm cooking, make sure to throw my clothes in the hamper rather than on the floor in the bathroom. Sunday mornings are my meal-prep days, I'll cook one or two large meals so I can just reheat them through the week rather than cook every day. I live alone, so I can usually get away with cleaning my bathroom every other week. I vacuum once a week (if I didn't have a dog, it'd be less). I do a load of laundry as needed, rather than letting it pile up and having to do several loads at once. I rarely do more than one chore a day - I won't vacuum and clean the bathroom on the same day, and my chores are usually done in 20 minutes or so in the evening before bed.

You just kind of have to prioritize what's important to you. Makeup and hair have never been important to me, I'd rather sleep later. Spending a weeknight together on a date with my SO is very important to me, I'm willing to stay up late and lose a few hours of sleep for that.

I sleep less. During the work week I only get 4 - 5 hours of sleep. So I do small things I want at night when I get home like play games, watch shows, go on walks. My days off are calculated to do bigger chores or work on my cars. It honestly feels like I never have a day off. Rarely do I have nothing to do on my days off, but if that happens I take a mini vacation.

It's the fact that you are still in school and also working. School takes up a lot of your time because you have to go to lectures, study, and do homework which already takes up a shitload of time. Adding a job to that load leaves you with absolutely no time. Once you graduate and are working your full time job you'll probably have enough time for hobbies and other things. Btw, I don't know how you handle it all. I had to quit my part time job because I was beginning to struggle in classes, I couldn't imagine having to deal with a full time job AND school.

We are having an issue at work right now. Our company was bought out by a mega corporation and they've been working us 10 hours a day, 6 days a week, since last Christmas.

When they ask for volunteers to work Sunday too and no one does, they act like we are being a bunch of assholes.

I saw a younger girl at work break down on the production floor crying because she was so frustrated.

We are talking about trying to form a union. I'm really surprised at the lack of support our local unions are giving us too. I reached out to three and all of them ignored me.

I work a 50 hour a week job, but at least I’m not in school anymore. I still have to spend a whole day cleaning. But I get one day to myself, and now that my gf and I live together we have lots of evenings together. But here is my advice:

You are working too hard for a minimum wage job. Minimum wage= minimum effort. Unless you are rewarded financially for all of the makeup and commuting, you shouldn’t be doing it. You should do the bare minimum to not get fired and spend all of your time looking for a better job.

I got stuck in the min wage rut after college. I realized I was burning up my body and mind with nothing to show for it. I told my manager she had to promote me, or I would walk. She recommended me for management training. Of course, I found a better job soon after that so I quit anyway.

If you work minimum wage you will never have enough time, because those wages aren’t enough to support even the most basic lifestyle. If you have to keep this job, you really need to cut back on that effort and put all of your energy into school or any other way you can get more opportunities.

The reasons humans do work is to do less work, as much of a paradox as that is. How can you improve your lifestyle in regards to money and leisure? The more work you do now up front, the more leisure time youll have later. I had to bust my ass to find a job and get certified to teach, and I had to pay quite a bit for the privilege of passing a test, but now I have a salary and two months off a year. Not everyone can do it, and the system is stacked against us. But it is possible to create a better life

The trick is making time. You still have right around 40 hours a week to do what you want, the same amount of time you spend working essentially.

Make time.

Don’t let work interfere with your hobbies. I don’t care what any boss tells you, your job is not that important. Yes it helps pay bills but happiness comes from doing things you enjoy. Let your hobbies define you, not your job.

r/antiwork

YOU ARE NEVER TOO BUSY FOR GOT!

So, I consider myself superhuman in this aspect. I work TWO PT jobs and end up with a 12 day work "week" EVERY WEEK of about 45-50 h. (Sometimes, I work a 13 day work "week", but that's just for a few hours and kinda helps me get up at a decent time on a Saturday.)

Apart from having a wee bit more social time which I'm working on (will get to in my post) I'm pretty content.

I'm one of those rare mature (see, 33) wives who didn't gain 30 pounds, chop off all their hair and stop wearing makeup. My house is also magazine pristine. People are afraid to sit down and anyone who comes in (the Reliance guy being the most recent) completely fawns over my home.

I also play competitive soccer 2x/week and have a fuck ton of hobbies. I love cooking, cleaning (obviously, lol), anything beauty related (I've learned how to do my own waxing, manicures, pedicures, eye lash extensions, etc.). I'm involved in Fandom and currently training my dog in agility.

Oh, and I'm a PT student. (Online, this makes life easier.) new course starts May 6. Merp.

So, how do I do it? It took a lot of fucking around with my work schedule to see what made life the most worth living. You may need to try different schedules, different environments, etc. to see what lets you retain some sense of self after you clock out. I, personally, was getting EXHAUSTED in customer service. I'd get home and want to go into the fetal position, so I said fuck that and I got another job that has NO CS at all. In fact, I can actually be a bitch of a bitch if i want to. It's great. Policy, FIRST! Your feelings, SECOND. It's been a great way to catch my breath. My second job has CS aspects, but aren't too draining. I get to make people feel GREAT. I recently processed an invoice for a CAS case so the person can get our services for free. I imagine the recipient will be so happy because her worker definitely was.

Am I on the go, go go? YES. But that's what you need to see can be FUN. We're young and healthy - do not squander that. There will be plenty of time to smell the roses. My source of inspiration for this is, ironically, work. I work with seniors and man they are BORED AF being chair bound.

Routines are key. Audio Books are key. I can spend 3 hours cleaning and not even notice it because I'm lost in a great book.

So, I do think a lot is about your attitude and adjustment.

I mentioned how I was working on my social life. Well, I decided that not every time I see a friend it has to be an "event" - a birthday, night out, etc. I've started to really tone down what I do with them and it really opens up time. My one friend comes over, we smoke weed, I do my laundry and we tan outside. It's glorious.

You can still relax and enjoy yourself. You just gotta learn what's important to you and what's not.

You don't , you have to start enjoying the tiny things and really push for the things you are passionate about. Weekends fly by in a blink of an eye , and they come back around just as quick. Early - mid 20s can be harsh, but you can literally do whatever you choose, your an adult, so don't let what other people think bother you. Go travel, live in a hippie hostal for a bit , meet new people , smile and don't worry.

I'm not in school anymore but these are the things I did to keep myself sane in gradschool.

Part of it is prepping as much as you can so you dont have to spend time throughout the week.

You will spend a lot less time getting ready each morning if you lay out your outfits on Sunday, and pack your bag for everything you need rather than doing it in the morning.

Learn some hair styles that can be done dry. By that I mean put your hair in a braid the night before, throw on a shower cap when you shower, and be done with it.

You will need to get staples of fruits and dairy at the grocery store each week. But you can stock up on just about everything else once a month. Meat, fresh vegetables can be frozen. Then your average grocery trip can be reduced to 2 sections of the store, in and out super quick.

Meal prepping sounds like a crock of shit that weird adults do but its really nice to not have to cook every single night. Even if you cook 2 or 3 times a week its better than cooking every single night. This will also save you time figuring out what to eat, as you can just make 3 of the same dish for a few days. You can also prep a few full meals and freeze the cooked version to have variety throughout the week.

Part of it is using your time wisely.

You have 45 min before your next class? Not a very useful amount of time for studying? That's plenty of time to get gas.

Lunch break is 30? Plan the meals you are doing next week.

Is the laundry unit in your house? Clean while laundry is going. Or throw it in the wash when you first get up. Dryer right before you leave (take out things that can air dry to save the wrinkles). When you get home warm it up again if you have to. You aren't dedicated to the house for that hour its in the dryer.

Is laundry at the laundry mat? Dont drive home. Study while you are there.

My biggest waste of time was travel. I brought everything I needed for the day with me every day. If I forgot something, can I substitute it without going back?

Part of it is being honest with how much time you have.

2hrs in the AM + 8hr work/school + 30min lunch + 8hr sleep = 18.5 hours. Lets say you have 1 hour commute home. You still have 4.5ish hours a day for other things. Keep laundry, cleaning, and grocery shopping to one of those days, and cook on that day. Cook one other day during the week, study at home while you do it.

Part of it is just saying fuck it.

Literally no one is making you do everything perfectly. You can get a little less sleep one night and go to a movie. You will be perfectly fine the next day. No one says you need to be a ray of sunshine in class/work every single day.

Literally no one says your underwear need to be folded or your floors mopped to perfection once a week.

You set your own standards.

Welcome to the world of adulting. You think it's bad now wait until you are married and have kids and they become old enough to be involved in after school curriculums (martial arts, soccer, music lessons, etc). Zero time for yourself.

It's all capitalism my dude. Busting our asses so someone else can get rich. We produce way more with our labor than we get paid for, if we actually got what we're worth we'd only need to work a few hours a day a couple days a week.

We actually work more than peasants in the dark ages.

Back then they only worked as long as the sun was out and when most people were Catholic, there were up to 35 days off each year (those "Saint ___ Day" on top of not working during cold months. When Protestantism rose, working too much was said to be godly so it was encouraged to be a workaholic.

We all definitely work too much.

8 hour work day (if you leave on time) 8 hour sleep (recommended) 1 hour wake up and breakfast and shower 1 hour lunch (if you have time to take it) 2.5 hour round trip commute (number off my last job) 1 hour make/eat/clean up dinner (generous)

21.5 working and 2.5 hours of free time to do adulting being generous

Only thing you can really do is live as close to your work as possible. Gotta thank unions for fighting for this much.

I love how we’re all suffering this same thing but no one wants to talk about the problems with capitalism.

OP make some time for your grandma. I didn’t and regret the hell out of it.

School is whats eating up your time.

Once you finish that, you will find you have a lot of time to yourself.

I hate to say it and I'm sure alot of you are gonna downvote me because you don't wanna hear but it's called a productive life. You bust your ass and learn to enjoy the little moments. Sometimes you get lucky and get an opportunity to make enough money that you don't have to work constantly and can afford to enjoy free time but for the majority of people in this world that won't happen and it's something you either learn to accept or you don't. My father worked his entire life, busting his ass every single day with little to no free time and most of the free time he did have he spent fixing things around the house so he wouldn't have to pay someone else to do it. He just retired at 68 and now he's free to enjoy the rest of his time on this earth. He earned that right through blood and sweat. Life isn't fair, it won't give you anything for free, it's a hard, cruel bitch and not everyone makes it out but the ones that do deserve an applause they'll most likely never get.

getting ready for work (shower+makeup+outfit+driving there=2 hours prior to my shift)

that is what i am not doing - but as you said you are in the US you are out of luck, as public transportation is nonexistent, thanks to car companies buying it all up then urnning it into the ground...
...fuck eah capitalism!

Don’t like think of work as just this stale place where u spend time. I’m a full time student and during the weekend I’m getting tutoring for school. Seems like I’m always doing homework and getting to places to get more work. But you still live during these times, u still can have a good time and school, you can still have some fun at work. If you look at it way too point blank then it’s depressing

[deleted]

This is NOT normal. It’s unhealthy and you and every other person deserves better than that. People shouldn’t feel like they have to suffer a routine like this just because everybody else seems to be doing it too. So as somebody who suffers a chronic illness which can be caused by pushing oneself too hard, please don’t perpetuate this idea unless you want people to think that’s a good way to live

[deleted]

Oh I see. You’re right I did, but I understand now and I’m sorry!

I don't think u/Vikingdiapers was implying that this is a good way to live. He was saying that this is the norm for so many people, and he was urging people to reconsider if this is what they think work should be like. He was advocating for a healthier work/life balance.

Half-ass your job.

This. Get reddit/game/social media out of your system at work so when you get home you do stuff that productive and brings you actual happiness

Psst we ARENT gritty enough to do that. We just have to if we want to pay bills or eat (notice the or, it's one or the other)

America has a super toxic work environment. We arent quite at Japan levels of overworked yet, though, so everybody thinks that its normal.

Get home around 6, go to bed at 11. That’s 5 hours a day to do whatever you want.

What about after work? I have like 6-8 hrs free after work to do whatever.

I wish I could say that it gets better, but it doesn’t. As you age, you hang out with your friends less. Maybe because you realize the 3 hours of hanging out to watch GOT doesn’t allow you to accomplish much. You may end up saying to your friends ā€œSorry, but I have to get up early in the morning for work.ā€ Instead you watch GOT by yourself while doing laundry and cleaning the house.

A year goes by, you still see your friends, but not as much. Pretty soon you all have jobs and responsibilities. You see each other for important events and still have a great time.

Another few years go by. You go to each other’s weddings and baby showers. Once the marriages and babies start happening, socializing regularly with friends becomes obsolete. Your birthday will roll around, you’ll get the obligatory ā€œhappy birthdayā€ text from your friend who 5 years earlier was your confidante accompanied with the ā€œI miss you. We should hang out.ā€ You’ll get the occasional text of ā€œI miss you. What are you doing next weekend?ā€ There will be back and forth coordinating baby sitters, work schedules, and spouses. It’s a pain in the ass. Eventually you realize that you would rather just sit at home, in your sweats in peace instead of jumping through hoops to meet up with a friend you rarely see anymore.

I’m in my 30’s, and I’ve seen this progression though out various stages in my life. It sucks. You meet amazing people in life that truly touch your soul, and you build fantastic relationships with people. Life and its responsibilities get in the way of living an adventure filled life. That doesn’t mean you can’t have friends. By all means make friends wherever you are at in life. Just understand that when you move on, they will too. Cherish the moments you do have with your friends. Just know that everyone is in the same boat as you, and it’s ok to choose responsibilities to get ahead in life instead of hanging out with friends.

You're on Reddit bro, you have the time

Yeah, the three minutes it took them to type this out? They could be a concert pianist by now if they’d just used that time for their hobby.

What a ridiculously overtly simplistic comment lol

Ah yes, exactly what I'm saying.

No- what I'm saying is spending time on the internet doing god knows what is time you could be spending doing a hobby - maybe not enough to become a "concert pianist" as you apparently thought but enough to START something. I personally spend a lot of free time on here that I could be using more productivity but idk maybe this situation is different.

The act of thinking, then typing a post like this is prime example of time they could have used differently. Maybe not just this single time but post after post after comment adds up. But go off dude.

Thank you for oversimplifying my comment.

You think sound smart but actually dumb. šŸ˜—

ā€œYou think you sound smart but actually dumbā€ lol ok champ! Way to screw that up entirely šŸ‘

I was trying to speak in your native tongue, forgive me.

No need for forgiveness. In that case, well done! I misread your top quality snark, so you may have a point.

Although I’d argue the person who insists that writing a post on Reddit takes up enough time to have a hobby is, but you do you šŸ˜‰

This was one of the big reasons I moved to Mexico

Honestly, a big part of it is just practice. Barring catastrophe it gets a little easier each day

I work full time and studied and had a child, now I work part time (30 hrs) and have 2 kids, I’m shattered but still make time to do something I enjoy once a week as my reward for being totally shattered lol

It's more true in India where we have 6 working days and the timings are 9 to 7. You are literally a slave who works to pay govt taxes and die.

[deleted]

I know man. Hence I find most of the things Americans complain feels like FWP to me. We have it hard here :(

First of all, it sounds like you are working more than 40 hours a week! You have a lot on your plate. My advice to you is to try to have a mindset of abundance rather than scarcity. It’s obviously easier said than done and does a big picture project, but if you can figure it out I promise you you will be happier. Think about all the time that you do have. For example, be present while you do your hair and make up and think of it as relaxing me-time rather than as busy time. Think of your morning commute as a great time to listen to and appreciate music rather than as another thing you have to do. If you start thinking about all the things you DO you have, you will get more satisfaction out of the golden nuggets of precious time you have.

I do. You just have to constantly improve your time management skills. Learn to steal time for yourself and your goals. Consider waking up early in the morning too because that’s what has made it so I still have time for me.

I can feel you, i live in Germany and I also gi to something like a community college here but it's a bit different. 2/,3 days a week a have to work for free in a kindergarten and the other days I have school. The days I have school are the only good days, the worst are the school vacation times. There I have to work the whole week from 8 to 4:30 PM and all of this for free and for an entire year. Since I don't earn money but still want some to at least buy some things I have to work on the weekends and when ever it fits. Luckily I live at home, but I still help my mom by buying groceries and help clean the house on some days. I have no idea how people can actually find peace and happiness in life while working.

Who needs a life?

I feel exactly the same. My husband and I both work full-time and we really only get to spend time together in the weekends. When you’re interviewing ask about PTO and how many hours you accrue each pay period. I hate my job but my agency gives some good ass PTO. So I’ll take off a week at a time a few times a year just to give myself a break. And when I get back I’m already planning my next week.

I think it just comes down to time management. I work 50 hours a week (Sun - Thurs ten hour days) and I have plenty of time to play video games,hangout with friends(if I had some I'd have the time) take hikes and do other things I like to do. I meal prep for the week on my second day off so I don't have to fuck around doing that during the week. I either take a shower at the gym after I get done working out or take a shower as soon as I get home from the gym and go to sleep. Outsiders looking in say to me "I don't know how you do it" but like someone else in the comments said it becomes a routine and you find ways to shave time after doing it so much

I feel you. I work a 40h week and have my weekends for me and I still think I don't have enough free time. And I don't have children yet... It's not that bad though. Putting it into perspective with respect to the past we have the freedom to do whatever we want when not working.

Anyway, I really think the full time job is not the issue here, it's the school that takes your weekend and your evenings studying. When it will be finished it will be a big relief and you will be able to enjoy that free time.

--> Find a job that you like and with a schedule that fits your life. Hold tight on your studies, it will really help to find it when you have a diploma. 40h a week is still a lot, you better enjoy it a little if you can.

Some advices that can help in the meantime :

- Put on your schedule something that you really like to do a few times per week. Treat them as mandatory stuff

- Having dinner with friends / family saves you the time to cook so it can be one of those mandatory things

- I don't know your relation to social media but try to reduce it as much as possible. It only shows the positive on people's life and gives you the idea that you are the only one struggling. It has an unconscious depressing effect on your mind. Also, it can really take lots of your time if you add those few minutes at the end of the week. Go see your friends / family / grandma with the time you spare...

Personally this is why I left my home (UK) and haven't returned, except an occasional visit, in over 12 years. I worked the 9-5 ,Monday to Friday shift , and even did mon-sat in a retail job. Hated every minute of it and did it for 6 years as I felt this was the expected path of life. Job, car, wife,house,kids. But I wasn't happy . I spent most of my time working for a company that would replace me in an instant and came home at nights tired and grumpy and had no urge to do anything but game or watch TV. My health suffered, my relationships with friends and girlfriends suffered and moreover my life suffered. It was in 2007 that I got a msg from my brother who had headed out to China on a whim. No reason , just got on a plane and got a job teaching English. It intrigued me. It wasn't a job I ever considered but it was way more fun sounding than my rutt of a life in Scotland. Long story short I headed out east. Was the best decision I ever made, for me personally. I know many who came out here (China, Vietnam, Korea,Thailand etc) and didn't like it or couldn't cope with being away from "home" , but for me the perks are undeniable- great lifestyle, easy schedule, half the working hours of back home, more time to travel/socialise, decent pay and a job that (to me) is rewarding and meaningful.

I guess the answer to the op's question is, I have a full time job and plenty of time to live because I choose this path. Not a very popular choice but certainly an option. Cheers. :)

I think a key thing here is to find a job you enjoy with colleagues whose company you value. Also, making the most of your lunch hour is important - use that time to read a book, watch a fun TV show, or have lunch with a friend.

On a more specific note, my most recent job was 4 days a week and had flexible working, so I could work from home a lot. Being able to cut out commuting made such a difference to how my whole day went, and being at home gave me the chance to combine chores and work - I could, say, prep my dinner and then get a spot of work done while food was in the oven. Depending on your industry, lots of jobs like this are available (although the 4 days aspect seems pretty unusual), especially in bigger cities. I'd recommend trying to find something flexible like this if you can.

You just have to figure it out. I put my 60+ hours per week in by working away from home during the week then at the weekend, my phone goes off and all of my time is spent with my children with no distractions. Nights out with my friends from home have been reduced to a few times per year but they mostly have children too so we can still see each other. I can have dinner and drinks with work colleagues during the week. Also in my country a work week is only 35 hours which means I can add a lot of the extra hours I do up as something called TOIL (time off in lieu) and add it to my standard 30 days holiday so I take a week or two off at a time and do whatever I want with kids or friends.

Admittedly it means that i can’t do anything regularly but with notice I can attend things as long as I can plan my time off in advance.

Also as you get older you can hire cleaners and you can pay for child care.

we’re basically living from one weekend to the next really. it’s a terrible way to live but i’d like to think it’ll get better one day... retired at 60 with barely any energy left to do the things we’ve always wanted to do when we were younger.

Hopefully for you it will be temporary thing because you're studying and that requires extra effort attending class + studying at home. When you only work, once home you can do whatever you want (appart from laundry, cleaning, etc). To save you some time, have you considered not using makeup? That's very time consuming so I opted to sacrifice that part. Before going to bed, I prepare the clothes for the next day, that also saves me time in the morning, when I'm too sleepy and slow to pick my clothes. For food, I opt for healthy+simple and quick to cookthings. Those are some of the small changes that save me some time.

Based on what you've put in here - most people with full time jobs aren't in school. If you're working and in school, that is a temporary arrangement so you can get a better job. Take all the time you need to spend studying and being in class... Now instead of studying or being in class, do whatever the fuck you want to do.

I used to let my job rule my life. I would answer calls and emails at home, etc etc. Now I don't do any of that unless they're paying extra, and even then I don't do it for long. My time away from work is my time. As soon as I adopted this way of thinking, you have a surprising amount of spare time.

So, I was in the same boat you were when I was 18-20. I worked full time nights, 11pm-7am. Then I started school at 8am and got home about 330pm. I did homework and went to bed around 6ish just to wake up 945 to start over again.

How i had a social life was to stagger my days off work with my weekends from school. So i took monday/Tuesday off work. That way i only had "half days" and weekends off school.

It was terrible. My social life was almost nonexistent and I tried dating, which didn't work. I slept a few hours a day at most and was basically a walking zombie. I basically put my life on hold till I graduated community college.

I guess it mostly depends on what you do. I work about 10 minutes from home, I start at 9 so I'm able to wake up around 8 am. I usually go to bed about half 12/1am, my work and my hobbies are so similar that I barely notice a difference, I guess the main thing to note is I do anything weekends so I get 2 days to do anything

Well when you finish school and have a full time job, you will no longer be in school right? There, you finally have your weekends back. Studying for school probably takes up a lot of time, no school no studying, time to pick up a hobby! Also traveling to school wot exist anymore so there is even more time you will have back.

A full time job is only 38 hours a week. And even if people work an extra 10 or 20, it’s not that bad. I used to work 2 jobs. One was 6:00-2:30 and then I got out and went to the other from 3:00-11:00.

And now that I’m older, things have calmed down a bit. I make more money and have weekends to myself.

So unfortunately, and this has never been more the prevalent, a person’s 20s is usually filled with nothing but work. But once you hit your 30s, usually you have found what you’re gonna be doing (roughly). Or at least have found a steady job with good benefits and all that.

Source: am 32

I work an average of 50 hours a week M-F I work from 7-5. I fish for 20 minutes on the way home almost everyday. I get home around 6:30 make dinner/eat, I play with the dog and/or work on a project till around 8:30. Spend time with the wife and go to bed. What I think the main problem is is that people watch TV to relax after work not that it's a bad thing. I work a labor intensive job. I walk about 7 miles a day at work. I think activity keeps the body moving.

I always have tried to live by an adage I heard years ago. "You don't live to work, you work to live." I have worked all kinds of jobs, from the military, to bartending, to call centers. I've found that if you don't have enough time to actually live, something needs to change. Personally, I found that fewer longer shifts made for the best work/life balance. Also, I stopped trying to accept whatever schedule had been given to me when it didn't work. Instead of begging for time off, I simply decided that I was "Not available" to work specific days or times. I know this doesn't work for every situation. I just want you to know that if where you work doesn't have a great work/life balance, especially a minimum wage place, there's often other options.

Get a job with the railroad on the maintenance side. We work 8days on and 7days off. We travel so you could be 8-12 hrs away from home. It all depends on the project.

My full time job is 4 on 4 off. I literally have 6 months off a year plus holiday. Find yourself a better shift pattern. That goes for everyone!

No one is going to like my answer but here goes... I’ve done all the below in the following stages...

  1. Stay in job, have 2 days off per week with 10 days paid vacation (in US) or 25-30 days (in Europe)

  2. Go part-time alongside others who want to do the same and rent a place altogether

  3. Start a job in something everyone else finds menial and allow yourself to work with a boss that will let you piss about (I’ve done this in shop work, cleaning jobs etc and we actually blasted our targets).

  4. Go freelance and do something you’re passionate about

I’m now at number 4 and I’m now happy I can do a number 2 alone at home :D

Side note - I’m now married and my wife supports me as I transition into a new stage of my freelance life and likes that I’m a stay at home dad too as our kids see a different dynamic.

It’s difficult I completely understand, but you’ll settle into how you want to live eventually. These difficulties help us understand our opportunities, and are our immune system for life choices.

PS- I also found that, when in a job I hated, all the other employees who hated it make it much more fun to cope with. From that I took that our mindset can make whatever situation we’re in a positive one.

Long ass story incoming, but here goes:

I've never felt the freedom I had while studying, just putting that out there right away.

I'm from Norway, so keep that in mind - extremly cheap education and where I lived back then (2010+) I could survive on the student loan + say a 5 hour part time technically (had my own student business on the side, didn't feel like work tho).

You can't do that these day if you live in a big city or say Oslo (the Capital).
Then you'd need ish a 25-50% part time I bet - so gone are the days (I might be wrong).

After finished my bachelordegree, I had a hard time finding a job and the business didn't work out so I worked part-time 10-40 hours a week (hard times).

Then it all changed: I got an apprenticeship + a new student loan to survive in the big city, and got myself another job - voila 50 hour weeks (2 extra days working 5 hours).

I spent 2 hours travelling to and from jobs, so 10 hours a day gone on "travelling".
+ another 10-12 on second job.

That's 60\~ hours spent on work related stuff a week, not fun.

Where did my freetime go?

I did however spend some time learning languages and tips regarding business while travelling, but I switched busses, trains and whatever a few times so it was hard to concentrate.

Now I'm back at it, new job - ish 40-45 hours (teaching).

While I was used to 50 hours, it's still way above what I hoped for back in the days, but it's quite alright (for now).

Max half an hour travel, so it's between 45-50 hours a week on work related stuff.

I have always aimed to get a business related to my bachelor (multimedia) up and running, but it's damn hard making it without some luck and time to actually prepare content + money...

Sure if I'm spending what I save on a house and keep strolling down the teacher path, I'll be your average worker, but this certificate of apprenticeship is just a means to and end for now - I'm slowly working towards the other part.

But my freetime is still fucked and definitively will be more fucked if I get a business/firm up and going (But work related to my bachelor never felt like actual work so there's that).

Here's hoping I can maybe one day take half a year off and live on the money I've saved up for a house and concentrate on getting started with my business or project I'd rather say.

Since I suck at it when I have other stuff to think about, I get home from work and want to chill or play game, meet buddies .. you name it.

I'd rather have no worries and spend 6-10 hours a day on business/project related stuff, not earning a dime and eventually within a few months get started.

Even if it's slow.

I'm not an effective guy, that much I know (this took half an hour writing in itself I bet lol).

That was WAY more then I planned, so I can't delete it like I usually do - I've started to know myself and this is also sort of a way to get stuff off my chest so I can continue as a "normal" human beeing for some time again without going crazy, so have at it!

Cheers!

If ya read all of it - feel free to ask any questions or share a story of your own!

I'd love to read em :)

I found that when I go home first and then have to leave to do chores or hobbies - it actually east ups a considerable portion of my evening. And after I get home it doesn't matter if it'd 7pm or 9pm - I'm equally as tired and will still find the time to eat, clean, toilet and shower.

Try to do things on your way home like shopping and it should free up some space if you didn't have it already.

Aside from that - being sociable means you need to sacrifice some sleep or cleaning tasks. I used to hate feeling like crap after seeing friends because I didn't clean or whatever but then realised for me at least, that seeing them and being tired after was so much better for my mental wellbeing.

All the best!

I don't know if you will read this, but I hope it makes sense and is helpful.

Everyone has 24 hours each day. Working is a part of life. The trick is to understand and chose the best you can what you as an individual find important and make sure time is allocated to that.

If you take 2 hours to get ready each day, that is just fine, but you have to accept that those two hours are your choice and enjoy it.

I have a full time job where I travel 20% of the time, wife, two young kids and house oh and school. I have a 30 minute commute. I still watch GOT on Sunday evening after the kids go to bed, I still have time for video games and my house looks alright. ( should power wash this year).

Anyway, it is possible. You just have to choose.

Lastly, the more you have others lifestyle choices impact your schedule and time allocation the less you are in control. If it is important to you then make it happen when you can, not when other can do it with you.

I felt this way til I got laid off and I had too much time on my hands. I missed working and I am glad to be back working again.

Ha! Welcome to adulthood :D

When I was working full time and going to school full time I barely did any housework (thanks future/ now husband) and only slept about 6 hours/ night. I also planned my wedding at the same time. During that time I still hung out and did things, though obviously less than now since I just have the full time job. Looking back at pictures, I look tired af. Now I look full of life again. Thank god it was only 2.5 years.

Do NOT give up on spending time with Grandma. You will unfortunately regret not having all the time you can with her. Take it from me - you really need to take as much emotional care of yourself and your relationships wherever you can.

I'm a bot, bleep, bloop. Someone has linked to this thread from another place on reddit:

 ^(If you follow any of the above links, please respect the rules of reddit and don't vote in the other threads.) ^(Info ^/ ^Contact)

I work nights. I leave at 8:50pm and get home at 6:10ish am. I then shower and sleep by like 8 and wake up around 2-3pm. I have a lot of hours to do stuff before I go back to work again each day even though I work 7 days in a row with like two days off.

I had to come to realize that when I go to work… I am still living my life. I used to say my life kept getting in the way of my life. What helped me is this zen idea that if I do the dishes to get them done I am going to be miserable while doing the dishes, but if I do the dishes because I am doing the dishes, with no outcome in mind, it’s much more pleasant and the dishes get done. I have a fulfilling life today with a full-time job, a three-year-old, 30+ friends, and still find time once or twice a week to do whatever I want to do with my hobby. Do I have four hours to work on my hobby? Do I have four hours to hang out with a group of friends? No. Do I get to the gym as much as I’d like? No. But, what I can say is that my life became much more meaningful when I stopped living it for me. Service to others is service to self. Check out Zen or Tao. Best wishes.

How much do you sleep/expect to sleep?

You make time for what you care about. That’s just it.

Welcome to the modern age, where we keep piling on more shit to do in an effort to make our lives "easier". It gets better when you're around 65 and you can retire.

Yes. This is what happens unless you are very talented and/or well-connected. I have wondered for a long time why people here insist that life in the US is the best in the world. If it is, that’s very disappointing.

I work full time and I don’t really know your situation but try to prioritize your loved ones/ grandma since I think you’re close to her. She/family won’t be around for long (practically speaking, sorry ), but you will have the rest of your life to work.

Try to make time after work. Few hours of visit wouldn’t hurt. Maybe have take out dinner then stop by her house and have dinner together. Best of luck

This is why you find a job that you really like because you'll spend a lot of your life there. It only gets worse when you have a family.

Because we don't also go to school!

IMO the work grind is way better than school. I have so much free time. But i wake up 15min before I have to leave home, drive only 15min, and meal prep everything but dinner all on Sundays.

Baby girl was just born so... things are changing I guess. Lol

It doesn't really get better once you buy a home that needs maintenance and acquire dependents.

The system squeezes every waking moment until lack of sleep brings illness or accident.

The wealthy get more spare time by paying someone else to do their undesirable tasks.

A big thing to remember here is that the majority of people with full time jobs AND interesting or time consuming hobbies have time for the hobbies because they’re done with school.

Also remember that those who are in school and working but still seem to have time to do things all the time are either working a part time job or they just don’t dedicate as much time to studying, etc. maybe they slack and put off schoolwork or maybe they just have a knack for it and don’t have to dedicate much time to understanding or completing it.

Only other thing I can say is cut down on prep time before work but I’m guessing that just gives you a bit more time to sleep.

We are just efficient with our time. In fact, I worked two full-time jobs AND still saw my friends on weekends. * I go on the internet in the gaps between things, I do t hang out there for hours. * I don't watch TV unless my roommate wants me to stay home and hang. * I don't commute. I don't get the point of driving an hour to work. I can only listen to so many podcasts. I find it better for me to move closer to my job or to get a closer job.

Once you start living that way, you have so much free time

I work a 9-5 job and then do law school from 5.30pm-9.30pm of an evening. I would never recommend doing school full time and also working a full time job. I think when you choose to do that you accept that you’ll have to sacrifice hobbies/relationships etc unfortunately

Once those two days go to actually being a weekend you're going to have quite a bit more time for a social life.

At this point it's like you have a full-time job and a part-time job on the weekend. I'm sure studying takes up quite a bit of your time as well.

You'll get a balance once you finish your degree.

This is exactly why I dropped out of college twice. I just couldn’t do it. I know there’s plenty of people who can, and I probably just didn’t try hard enough.

This is my biggest fear in life tbh. I’m in my final year of college so it’s looming

Musician (early 50s). I used to play out all the time. I just can't reconcile my responsibilities at work and playing out on weekdays...even weekends. To be fair, I did set myself up like this. Even though I couldn't do as much as the other guys at work I live close and I could always be the one that could come back & help the 2nd & 3rd shift people avoid loss of test time. My knowledge has grown substantially so I help more people more often. I also go to the gym 6 days a week so that makes me pretty tired in the evenings. I know a lot of people in bands that have a heavy schedule and I just can't imagine that they're doing too much at work. Nobody ever mentions their daytime job. I read somewhere having a routine is really important for mental health. I have a pretty strong routine but it doesn't leave a lot of time for fun stuff.

I have a full time job and I do have time for other things as long as I don’t work late that day. Basically you need to get skilled with shortening how long it takes you to do everything lol.

Take 10 min showers and groom yourself quickly. When cooking dinner also cook the next days dinner as well so you only need to reheat it. Those two things save you lots of time.

I thought I would have more freedom and downtime as an adult...

This is hilarious!

I'd consider finding a job closer to you. Driving 4 hours is a ridiculous part of your time.

It’s all about the mindset. Just make sure you specifically lay out time for yourself. I used to do full time work, school, dating, etc. I always tried to have. A few hours to myself. even if that meant waking up a few hours before I needed to get up.

When I got married, we separated the house work so that we can both have more time to rest. Maybe find a roommate and split the housework in half.

Also, it makes it a lot easier to do the other persons laundry if you like them and are friends with them so pick someone you trust and enjoy being around.

i work full time monday-friday 7 am-3pm! since i get off so early it’s easier to find things to do between 4-9pm and i go to bed usually at 10:30-11! maybe find a job that starts early and you can have free days!

You adapt. For me it was working at home.

I get up at 5.

Minor stretch / home workout

5:30 Make breakfast for me and the kiddo, wake her up. Eat on couch and spend time with her 6:30 she goes to bus stop, i log in.

Work until 3:30 when she gets off bus. During day run dishwaswer and laundry. Prep dinner during lunch.

3:30 to 5, time with daughter. Shopping, tennis, swimming, homework.

5pm, dinner. 6pm, she cleans up and loads dishwasher, i go to the gym until 7pm.

7:30, calm down time. We watch a tv show together.

8:30 starta "dad time". Weekdays she goes to bed, weekends she stays up. But at 8:30 i get alone time. Either paint warhammer figures or play on my ps4. Edit: sometimes work. Most days lately but yay overtime!

11pm crash an wait for 5am.

I don't hahahahaha

^(continue giggling like an idiot in the corner*)

I don’t know your work schedule but maybe try night classes if you can. If you take night classes during the week, it will give you two days of being miserable during the week.. but the weekends free. Of course you can’t drop your classes now and do it, but see if it’s offered next semester.

Seize the means of production!

I work a full time job now and have done the whole degree / work thing so I know what you are talking about (albeit in the UK not the USA).

Firstly 2 hours to get ready and get to work each day seems like a lot to me, If I were you I would start by doing the following if possible:

  • Shower the night before, this has the added benefit of being far cleaner as you aren't taking a days worth of grime into bed with you each evening! Yes you may sweat in the night but it's not really comparable to a days worth of grime.
  • I don't know how much of those 2 hours is your commute but for a minimum wage job i'd be looking at working as close to home as possible. Travelling for an hour for minimum wage isn't ideal.
  • Makeup I can't comment on other than to say that for a minimum wage job I wouldn't go overboard with it and just try to stick to the basics.
  • After work you have to decide what days you want to do what stuff but if your commute isn't too terrible you should have a good few hours to see a movie or gym or whatever but it's unlikely you can do multiple things in one weekday evening so just focus on one at a time.
  • Laundry, cleaning etc is best done as you go if you don't really have your weekends.
  • Pop to the shops at lunch and grab bits or swing in on the way home for 20 mins.
  • Do 2-3 small loads of laundry a week if you can
  • Clean things as you see them rather than let them build up

However, I think the main issue is that you don't have your weekends, once you get these back you will feel more relaxed but the little things above will help hopefully.

Sorry if this sounds like i'm teaching you to suck eggs, perhaps you already do these things and perhaps you won't be able to relate as our cultures are different but just thought i'd put in my 2 cents.

Planning ahead. Often I'll go to something straight from work or stay up late to do whatever it is I'm doing and know that I can only do my washing on a Sunday and Wednesday for example.

Can you change your hours in your work? Working 4 days a week with an extra 2 hours on each day will mean you earn the same and work thr same hours but get a whole day free.

Reducing the time getting ready is a good shout from lots of people already. I start work at 8:00 and wake up at 07:10 and I have to look presentable. It's possible but difficult for me, but I live close to my work (I chose my flat to be this close) and I'm a male (I didn't choose this but I understand it's easier to get ready).

You either put your dreams on hold or do them kind of half-assed.

My example is art. When I work full time I have a few hours to put towards it but if you want to get anywhere in the art world or even improve to a satisfying level you need way more time. As I slowly extricate myself from body and soul crushing restaurant work my art has really improved. I look back at the stuff I did while working full time or more and raising a family and it’s terrible.

There are jobs out there that offer good hours while working shifts, I'm in England and my shifts (12 hours) are 2 days, 2 nights then 6 days off (12 shifts a month) with 18 days off in the summer, and 2 weeks off at chiristmas. Granted it took a while for me to get the job but hard work and determination pays off and I'm sure you'll be fine OP because you're asking the right questions already.

Lol. Welcome to adulthood.

You make sacrifices for things that you really care about. Sometimes you cut your 2 hour prep time down to long enough to throw on makeup & clothes & run out the door so that you can stay up a little later or you don’t spend your whole weekend studying or cleaning your house so that you can go do a hobby or spend time with family.

It doesn’t matter if you work full time or are a full time stay at home parent, you will NEVER feel like you have enough time for all of it. The key is to figure out what is most important & make the time for things that make you happier.

There is a lot of things to mention here.

First off, understand the 40 hour week is kinda BS and is simply expected by culture and society.
Let me break down the maths for y'all. There is 24 hours in a day, you need about 8 hours of sleep, and 40 hours of work per week over a 5 day work week is 8 more, and this leaves 8 hours not sleeping or working. Seems balanced when you first think about it. My job, My sleep, and My interests can all get an equal 8 hours. Of course, those 8 hours of work don't factor in for commute and anything else related to it's upkeep, and like you said, it can be up to two hours per day of time spent for some people, and that leaves the question of what of the three balanced 8 hour segments of your life are going to take that hit? Not work. It's socially expected and very logical as the more time at work, the more money you get. (usually, if paid hourly) So, there is what some people who call themselves night owls (who probably aren't true night owls) do which is take that time out of their sleep. Of course, that is not the healthiest and people need their sleep. So that leaves you're time.
That is why the 40h week is bs. People think money is everything and the most valuable resource that could potentially buy anything. There are no resources more limited and valuable than time and space. For us humans, time is really a big factor. WARNING: This may get existential, and if you are prone to existential crisis breakdowns or panic attacks... maybe don't read...
We get about a century of time, if we are lucky. The first two years you are not really sentient, and you are not really developed until almost 25. While you can still lump in the pre-25 ages as an era known as childhood and young adulthood, there is still the factory of the first 20-ish years of your life being very restrictive and limited by your lack of ability and experience in the world. Now what makes that worse is we spend about a third of our lifetimes sleeping. So, 100-20=80/3=\~26-80=54. (Bit tired, math may be wrong) but there we go, after all is said and done we practically have half of our life to live to the fullest as adults. (again, if all goes well in life) Now another third of that is about to go to work, and that is also going to engulf about an hour on average per day of other duties and responsibilities. So again, we get like just over 20 years to do what we want. It can sound like a lot but remember that is 1/5th of your life that you truly get. Not to mention the fact that due to the mortality of our existence you might not even get it and the fact that if you work as hard as some people. Two 40 hour jobs, a family, and online schooling (I have heard of) with the plans that you have a lot of money for retirement at 50-60 and you bite it in your 40's having worked your ass off and fingers to the bone using every second you had to the pursuit of payday after payday to fill a savings account you never get to dive into...

Basically, 40 hours is over doing it and our society could do with changing a bit. 30 hours could work better as a expected average. Since some people will still want to work two 40 hours jobs and go to college because some people are workaholics.

Now the first thing I said was there is a lot to mention here and that before was just the first point of many. At least three. So here we go...

Fortunately this one is shorter and many have mentioned this. Try to find ways to cut down on your time getting prepared for work. Maybe assess and try to figure out what you could do differently in the various aspects of your life that you could cut down out, cut our entirely, or maybe find an alternative or way to do the same thing but quicker and more efficient. If you have never heard of video game speed running it's an interesting thing to see and that is literally all about finding the best ways to do things in the quickest possible ways as the goal of speedruns is to usually beat the game (or sometimes missions or levels) in the shortest possible times. (This is called 'routing') The amount of time saved for them can come down to seconds if even that, which doesn't matter as much in real life but speedrunners do things someone who normally plays the game typically does not do, know of, or even think about. Now a big thing in speedrunning communities is taking advantage of glitches to cut out loads of time since in some speedruns it is literally all about going from starting the game to making the credits roll. Although they also will do things in ways normal players won't that are not glitches and that is what we will focus on because as far as we've discovered, we can't glitch reality. From just the specific order and manner one does things in to compiling and multitasking or automating some parts.
Some simple things that most people do, don't drive across town for the groceries, then back across town for the next errend, and back and forth. Most people lay out a trip of errends to typically go in one smooth route. More complicated though is figuring out what you can do otherwise. Some people argue brushing their teeth in the shower instead of before the shower is quicker, etc. It's not easy to give examples as I don't know what would make sense to how you do things. I guess it's kind of like having someone who starts the coffee maker and waits for it before they start cooking, and then waits to be done eating before checking the weather. You could start the coffee and make the meal, then eat while checking the weather. Just pile the tasks on top of each other.

Anyway, that went a bit longer than I planned, but hey last part.

Outside of that I guess you just have to realize that time indeed is the most invaluable resource as you can never get more once you are out. Life is what you make of it, and while you can get upset at societal norms for making you belief you needed to bend over backwards making a living, you only have yourself to blame if you reach your final moments regretting a ton of things you never got to do. NOW: I am not saying just drop everything and live it up until you go down, a healthy balance is best. If you feel like you need more time for yourself or the things you want to do, maybe you should reevaluate things. Maybe look into less hours, or a healthy change in lifestyle. Again, I can't tell you how to make it work, I'm not you. I understand it won't always be as simple as less hours because sometimes those 40 hours barely makes the bills and especially the tuition, and then that crammed weekend of, well, cramming during your academic time is needed to keep your grades up so you can pass and get your degree. Hell, and maybe a bit of suffering through that now will lead to a lot less of suffering ahead of you with a better career from your degree.

TL;DR Money, time and space are all resources, and while money is valuable, space and time are invaluable and far more finite, especially time. You get about a century total if your lucky, and you might get to enjoy about 1/5 or 2/5 of it and once it is spent, it is spent. Trying to maximize efficiency while evaluating your life choices to avoid a laundry list of death bed regrets is weirdly one of the few true keys to happiness.

I work 8-5 during the week (salaried position) and I am a part time MBA student with class 2 nights a week after work. I also am married and have a daughter, sui that takes up a lot of my time too. Honestly i don't see how it's that difficult to fit the time in. I have plenty of time on weekends to do my homework and whatever i have planned, whether that be mowing the lawn or hanging out with some friends.

Honestly, most people work is their lives and it’s sad and depressing! I can’t bring myself to do it. I live mostly in abject poverty in ā€œthe greatest nation in the worldā€ simply because I work part time and refuse to let work be my entire life.

The only other option seems to be to do for a living the things you’d otherwise do for fun, but that’s not the easiest thing to accomplish.

You have to make it a priority. I have always been the "no time sorry" guy but I recently made hobbies and hanging out with friends a priority for my own sanity. go eat dinner with friends one night instead of at home. fit in a yoga session early morning with a buddy. something that fits in your schedule and your life. Finding time to get away from the grind is extremely important and I am a much happier person now because of it.

Initial thoughts: 1. You’re doing school and a job, once done with school how much time does that free up? Time traveling to school, being in class, studying, reading, researching, or doing homework... It adds up. 2. How long is your commute to/from work, is it something you can shorten? 3. I don’t deal with hair (shave my head every couple days) or makeup, is there a way to simplify your routine? 4. As far as chores and errands, that’s hard to reduce, but eventually you’ll find ways to simplify or share responsibility when you live with someone, generally an SO. Eg I cook and do 99% of grocery shopping while my wife does all laundry (I help fold a few items and put my own stuff away).

[deleted]

I get ready for work in 15-20min. Haha

They sacrifice sleep

What’s really crazy is realizing that your child spends more time with his daycare providers than his parents. Our entire socioeconomic regime is inhumane.

I dont have a job and dont have time myself. I do have ME/cfs tho but still. Exercise, dinner, house clean, shower etc.. not enough time for stuff y agree:) maybe we spoiled. Maybe we make work more than necessary idk.

we don’t. Western culture is arguably designed that way. a busy, worried citizen is a taxpaying citizen who doesn’t make waves.

What helps me a lot, it's very time saving to live near your work, like 10-15 min away. Do that if you can. It's live changing

I’m not sure if it’s welcome advice, but I serve so I’m able to work less and still make similar money. 30 hours serving vs 40 hours retail feels so much better. Working for pennies and dimes is exhausting.

Me: Working full time (8 hours/day) and around 1 hour for going home <--> office. I also do freelance (currently 2 jobs, 1 in rush, 1 long term). My routine be like: wake up - have breakfast - prepare for work - go to work - go home - have dinner - cooking (for next day) - work - relax (around 30 mins: surf web, reading book...) - go to bed. My tips are no so much: - Fully concentrate while working - Make a schedule with priority - Don't waste too much time for small activities - Use machine for chores (I have a robot vacumm to clean my house every morning, washing machine...)

That's all :-|

P/s: I still have 1 night off, it's friday night, date with my girl friend or watch movie, read book. I also spend half day in weekend for playing game if my tasks are done

It's tough. I work full time (40-60 hours a week), I've started tracking how much time I spend on work each week (from the moment I start thinking about it not when I clock in) and it's about half my day, add on top of that, I'm trying to start my own business, landscaping my woods, 3 other side projects, and I try and hangout with friends and family at least once or twice a week. It's a lot but there are a few things that can help.

  1. Prep the night before. Make your lunch, shower or anything else you can do after you get home, maybe while you watch the news or something. I work at a green house so it wouldn't make sense for me to shower before work.

  2. Dedicate specific media time (Twitter,Reddit,YouTube, ECT). Having a 15-30 mins in the morning or something will save you a lot of time waisting throughout the day. I watch through my YouTube sub feed during my lunch break.

  3. Decide what's important. The harsh reality is you can't do everything, at least not now. You'll have to make sacrifices for what's most important to you.

I work a full-time job and attend university for my bachelors. My job is also 27 miles one way.

I still have a social life you need to find a way to have better time management

27 miles is 43.45 km

You’re overwhelmed right now because of school and work. When I have my month long break between spring and summer semester (currently in a masters program) I’m amazed at how normal life feels and how I can just wake up; go to work, and come home at 5 still somewhat tired but not mentally exhausted. I have time to do my hobbies for a short period of time on weekdays and definitely weekends are more relaxing.

I promise once you graduate, it’ll lighten up! Stay strong!!

I’ve wondered this for a long time. I think society may be changing a bit. I work from home and have and made great money doing it for 9 years now. The peers I have making six figures likely work 4-6 hours a Day is my guess. I work harder myself but still not too much off maybe 7-8 hours a day. I avoid commutes and can leave whenever, it’s my house. Nobody knows. Even with that my life feels completely full and busy, I don’t know how office jobs do it. Although I do think more and more people are working remotely. It’s amazing I love it.

I'm not in the US and trust me it's a global issue. Work used to be a part of life, now our life revolves around

we time everything around it, even interactions with our own families..etc

even people who don't go to school, they usually have part time jobs or something else to get them more money.

and to y'all with babies, you're strong!

but yea, honestly, I'm scared for the future :\

Get cash flow. If you're lucky, you'll earn free money. You'll need a high graduate salary. Otherwise you're gonna be like 99% of people on this Earth. The unfortunate truth. Granted, you could do a 3 or 4 day week and live frugally?

Honestly, you don't. I have a rotative schedule, and my work schedule changes every week. I never have the same days off and never can plan two weeks ahead. I was starting to get a hold of my life when my SO and I decided to move to an apartment that we have to redesign and it's being easily the most stressful time of all my life. But I know it will get better! Once I'm in that new home, I will get to fully rest at night. And I will get to go on long walks without distractions with my puppy. And of course, will have everything settled. But for now, it's just stress on my life. What a month I have coming! I even got a nervous tic in both my eyes, and it's been going on for three weeks now!

Wish me luck and hope I make it to June alive!

U basically sleep less and miss work to do things.

I don't. I get up, go to work, go home, bed time. I really hate my life a lot even though I love my job. I feel like I'll just be doing this forever. I don't work weekends though so I try and play games that really suck me in like pillars of eternity. I just take what I can get.

Once I finished school, weekends and weekday nights are when i relax and enjoy hobbies.

yep

Im a fairly new to adulting also (1,5 year out of college) and Ive just accepted that to achieve things I have to do more and more, so I'm bettin on the go go go -mindset. Yes I'm exhausted all the time.

The original Union plan because having any free time was a Union negotiation was 8 hours to sleep, 8 hours to job, 8 hours to yourself, 1 day to family, and 1 day to god.

The hard part is the passive time wasters like tv and commuting. Cut out that and you have all the time in the world. Watching TV/Video, playing a few hours of TV to relax are 2-3 hours a day you are never getting back. Ride or walk to work gives you some time to squeeze in exercise without eliminating too much free time. Cut out weeknight TV unless you count that as family time - it does give you something to talk about and you have 5 hours to travel to and from a nice dinner. Make sure you leave your house one day on the weekend was key for me. There’s weekday clean and then there’s weekend clean. Weekday clean is making sure the sink is empty, garbage is thrown out, things are not piling up anywhere. Toss in a quick wipe here and there. Weekend clean is more thorough. Cooking gets easier with practice. It’s an efficiency and timing thing. You do have to clean vegetable, you don’t have to peel them. Cook the ready stuff and prep while things are heating. Better still, mix the chores. Cook dinner for your friends. As for dinner, they care about the experience - it doesn’t have to be Martha Stewart stunning in presentation.

Edited to add Sleep. Get a solid 6-8 hours a night. There’s no making it up on the weekend and having a life.

But seriously, there’s Netflix and chill, and then there’s lost in your own world without interacting with humans.

Sounds like you’ve become just another worker. That’s my biggest fear. Go to college, work a 9-5 for the rest of my life making ok money, living paycheck by paycheck. People with that life don’t really have a life I feel like.

I got out of the 40hrs hampster wheel not too log ago. Best decision ever. I have my own carpentry business, and while yes, there are some 40hr (+) weeks, I choose those hours now. But I also don't work when I don't want to. I don't leave my clients hanging , but I schedule accordingly to what my life has going on first, then I schedule clients around that. I'm going on a two week road trip in a few months. Couldn't do that as easily working in an office. (and please don't take this wrong I'm not trying to put down anyone who works in an office but it wasn't the lifestyle I wanted after 18 years of doing so). I tell clients upfront that there is no Sunday work (unless and emergency or I have just touch up to and the job is finished). I have no one micromanaging me! I was a college student before, working service jobs. Landed my "dream" job after college, still worked part time serving, and was mentally and physically exhausted constantly. Husband and I decided not having time together wasn't worth the money. And even with me working "less" hours, we are still doing just fine. I get to clean my house before ten pm. I get to make a real dinners again because I leave at 4-4:30 and don't have to deal with hour traffic. We do not have children yet, but choosing my new work life was a priority so that I could be the mom I want to be, without an outside force deciding my time at home. There is absolutely nothing wrong with working part time. Your life style and spending need to reflect that, but if you prioritize for yourself with some real honesty, out can find a real happy balance, finding satisfaction in the work you do and the life outside that you get to live. Best of luck to you in school sweetheart. It's worth it. it's hard, but it's worth it. Just remember your life and mental well being come first. Everything else can be scheduled around that.

I was like you before. I worked 2 jobs and had a social life though - but i was busy. So busy. Now, I have kids, a job, a social life and I can’t believe I thought i was busy before.

Yeah, wait until you through in a kid and owning a house. You learn to have fun around work, plan things, give yourself weekends. But sometimes it is overwhelming and feels very unfair that work is always in the way. But at the same time you need the $....eventually you will figure it out, for the most part.

I work 12 days straight, usually 6-9 of those days are 12 hour shifts. I have kids and a marriage. All I can say is, once you get into such a busy cycle, you either find time or make time.

Just remember, being crazy-busy like this is finite. You won’t always be so busy. I (as a firefighter) HAVE to retire in six years due to age. I’m already exploring my next phase in life. I’m looking forward to staying busy, but not too busy to live!

I've honestly been wondering the same. I have a friend who does that but I have no idea how.

The only way I was able to do this was by 1) neglecting important things and 2) having mental break downs every other day.

Now I'm on medical leave to try to sort this out. So yeah. i feel you.

We don't, lmao

I feel the exact same and don’t even have school to worry about anymore! Sometimes, when I walk to work in the morning, I think, ā€œwhat a rat race...ā€ don’t know the solution either other than trying to stay positive!

Trust me i wonder this. Im in community college only taking 2 classes, i work full time, and still dont have much time to take care of my house. I dont get much time to exercise, I dont go out with friends, i have zero free time. I'm glad you posted this because im generally curious how others adult as well!

I work a 12 hour day. 3 days one week, four the next. I have a lot of days off. Plus vacation. I don't ever want to go back to 8 hour days.

I know I’m late to the party but as someone who graduates college early and has been working since February, I’m not looking forward to attending graduate classes and also working full time. I know my free time will tank. However, I know it’ll all be worth it in the end when I am moving up in the world and eventually raising a family with my wife.

It does suck sometimes knowing I can’t just spend hours after hours doing stuff I wanna do, but ultimately I get by with the mentality of ā€œthat’s lifeā€. I also have a fulfilling job (I work in the mental health world) and I can actively feel like I’m doing something good every day. Granted, even when I just worked facilities at my college for 40 hours, I loved feeling like I did a hard days’ work at the end of it.

Ultimately, feeling accomplished and successful is what has driven me to still be positive. Rather than thinking of all the time I am missing, I think of all the time I still could have. And frankly, I get down in the dumps when all I do on a Saturday is stay inside and watch shows or play games all day. Biggest advice is to get a job you find honestly fulfilling and purposeful. Hope my rambling helps!

This is a discussion I've had numerous times...and I agree, never enough time for what I want while working full time. I've been at my job for 20 years and notice the older I've gotten the worse it's gotten. I'm exhausted when I get home. Make dinner, do the dishes, and take 30 minute walk. Then it's time to begin getting ready for work then next morning and bed. Saturday's I clean, groceries and laundry. Sunday, finish up what I didn't Saturday and rest in the afternoon. Maybe read a book, or watch a movie...then it becomes like the weeknights and I prepare for work Monday morning. I don't know the answer .. but I sure wish I had more time to "live". Best of luck to you!

many people just choose to ignore shit you're doing. you're making the mistake of assuming everyone is being a responsible adult.

I know lots on here won’t want to hear this, but quit Reddit and other social media. You’ll have much more free time than you can imagine. Better yet, buy a non-smart phone. I’m sure you like everyone else in 2019 waste hours of your time per day on social media or on your phone in general. You have over 4K karma in less than a year. That wasn’t really a thing when you were a kid being told that you’d have time to do all of these things.

Excellent point, it's very hard to balance :/ I was musing about a related issue awhile ago: https://www.reddit.com/r/Showerthoughts/comments/aqx135/people_live_in_nice_suburban_homes_but/

Just buy things and don't pay attention to any sort of news.

I went to graduate school full time, and still had a career, and husband and kids in competitive athletics. It was ridiculous how regimented I needed to be. Right now I work around 60-70 hours a week and fit in hobbies around it. My house is rarely clean from top to bottom unless I hire it out.

This is still a question I’m wondering about. It’s so hard to balance everything, between working full time, commuting, going to the gym and taking care of yourself, taking care of the house and pets... and that’s all before being social or hobbies. I don’t know how people with kids handle their lives.

You put my concerns into better words, OP. Yes, it is (unjustly, imo) implied that we are supposed to fry our fucking brains and bodies yet continue as if we have an infinite well of zest for living. It’s fucking bullshit. What really pisses me off is that, in time, collective humanity will wake up and start working considerably less hours per week while technology handles the monotonous nuances in our systems - we just won’t be around to enjoy it.

I question it myself, but I think it’s just learning to balance everything. I have a full-time job, have a small, part-time business I own, part-time student, exercise 4-5 times a week, and have some time to socialize maybe once or twice a week. I’ll drive myself insane sometimes with my busy weeks sometimes, but balancing time helps. For example, 45 minutes to workout, 45 minutes of school, an hour with my side business, 10 minutes cleaning the kitchen, etc.

I’m also just naturally busy compared to the average person, but America is so well known for overworking themselves. My best advice is just balancing time, doing small things here and there, and that usually helps me.

Andrew Yang 2020!

That's life, buddy.

I work 37.5 hours a week. I also am enrolled in 3 classes every spring/fall and 2 every summer. This is my story.

Generally its a matter of prioritizing what I want. I cant cut out work and I cant cut out school, so with the few hours every day I have to myself, I make a choice with what to do with them. Maybe I cross stitch. Maybe I play video games. Maybe I work out. Maybe I watch netflix. And luckily, I happen to be off every weekend, so I can conviniently hang out and have social time then. Its admittedly a very BUSY life, but once Im out of college thats another few hours to do what I want each day, so its an ok one. I dont have time to do everything I want every day, and thats ok. But I certainly have time to do everything I want in my life, its just a bit spaced out.

I used to work mon-fri 6:30-3:30 and I still found time to have a life. Before I got home from work I'd go run and do all my errands and when I got home I'd do light cleaning every day then either curl in bed and watch Netflix or go out for a few hours with friends. It's all just time management.

As for you with school on the weekends and I'm sure homework throughout the week it's pretty impossible to do much. Just wait until you get out of school and your time will free up like crazy.

Well, sorry. You thought wong. Most of us did.

Welcome to adulting

I'm currently working 35-40 hours a week, enrolled in school, have two kids and basically all of the cleaning is my responsibility.

I find time to do what I want to do. All you have to do is prioritize things throughout the day. I get that you want to look good for work, but you're taking a while to get ready. That being said, I totally get it because I'm a hairdresser and have to have my hair and makeup done. But I usually take a shower before bed and then I can just style my hair in the morning to cut out drying time. Makeup gets easier the more you do it. I can whip out a full face in 15 minutes now.

Instead of eating at home alone, why not eat with friends? It's a good way to be social and take care of something you have to do anyway.

As far as cleaning goes, do a little bit every day, and don't stress if your house doesn't look like a magazine photoshoot. We have clutter and mail and school papers everywhere, that's just life. But a good tip is while you are watching a TV show, every time there is a commercial (or the episode ends if you're doing netflix) run a dish to the sink, wash a dish, switch the laundry, vacuum real fast. Something small. Then before you know it chores are done!

Make sure to do something fun for yourself. Shopping, meeting friends, etc. I go out once a week with my girls, it's cheaper than therapy (especially when you work with the public). Sometimes we can be burned out from doing too much and it can make you feel more tired. Getting enough rest and some exercise helps, along with a good attitude. Remind yourself that things won't always be this difficult for you and it'll get better in the future when you're done with school, working a different job, blah blah blah. Also losing the mentality of "why does life have to be this way" and replacing it with "let's kick today's ass" helps me quite a bit. It's all in how you look at things.

Sorry for the wall o' text. I hope this helps someone!!!

You know how people struggle to find that work/life balance.? Well, that’s the point you’re doing now. I’d say that it gets better with time as you settle into your social role and realize that work is also your life. Find something meaningful and fulfilling to you and at least the time you spend at work will not feel like a waste of time. Help others along the way and create the life you want. It won’t be easy and sure as hell will not be perfect but you will prevail. If you don’t have kids now, don’t have any. They’re great and all but if you think you don’t have time now with kids it’s worse but you willfully sacrifice your time for them. Good luck in your journey.

I end up having a couple hours in the evening after work (none in the morning that’s just get up get ready and go, maybe check reddit for a minute or two) and then Saturday and Sunday.

I suspect that’s fairly average, I earn just enough money and am given just enough time off that I don’t lose my mind and stop working efficiently, it’s a fairly exact science

You honestly might have more time after you're done with school. I graduated last year myself and got an 8-5 job (with a 1hr lunch break).

I got into the habit of waking up early (around 5 or 6) so that I can relax a little more. I'll read a book or actually cook breakfast (it took a while to get myself to be able to eat breakfast without getting sick). When I get home, sure I dont have a lot of time but I do also get the ENITRE WEEKEND off.

When I was in school, even those days werent completely free. But now they are. I just get up at 7 and go do stuff. I may spend a whole morning doing groceries and cleaning but after that I still have most of the day left to do whatever I want.

College is going to be one of the busiest time in your life. After that you actually get more freedom than you would think.

I am 44 and it can be tough sometimes with kids and family it leaves very little time to do your own thing.

I thought the other day jesus I have another 20 years of this left till I retire. It certainly can drain on the soul.

Those of you that are younger and coming out of school. Find something you love todo so that when going to work you enjoy it. Hating your job will make life very very long. Save some money and enjoy doing stuff you like to do in your spare time even if only for a few hours.

I dropped out of school before I finished learning how to socialize and started working full-time evening shifts. 7 years later I still don't know how to socialize.

Its easier when your not in college. You dont have a full time job. You have 2 fulltime jobs. Infinitely different situation.

I too worked while in college and had no free time. It gets better once you get out of school. Back then all I did sleep, study and go to work.

I spend 8 hours at the office, an hour and fifteen minutes commuting and usually sleep about 9 hours. That leave 5 hours and 45 minutes for other stuff every day.

If it was only a full time job, no kids, no side hussel, no school, you could just recharge and get chores done after work every night then go have fun Friday, hobbies Saturday. It's too much but it's doable.

Most adults come to view time differently e.i. its reasonable to expect it to take a year to finish a hobbie project vs when you're a kid a year is a lifetime.

You find a routine that works for you. A higher paying (better) job will most likely have a better schedule and be flexible. This is something important to remember when job hunting. Vacation/sick/schedule are often over looked for pay, but they are all very important. Making 100k a year with no vacation is worse than making 85k with three weeks of vacation and flexible schedules.

After work (330pm) I make some dinner, relax, hit the gym, play some games, go for a bike ride, or maybe BBQ outside if its nice. It all works out in the end.

Honestly, if you're doing work+school together yeah, you're not gonna have time for anything else. Sucks, but it's only for a few years.

Once you're only working though, it can still be a problem if you don't prioritize. Figure out things like:

- Are you cooking every night? Can you cook once on the weekend instead and freeze portions for the week, or even two weeks? (Investing in \~50 Rubbermaid small freezer containers with labels is one of the smartest things I ever did.)

- Do you have an hour commute each way? Living next to your workplace may be more expensive, but it can be a small price to pay for an extra 10 hours of free time a week

- Can you clean/laundry faster? If you have 8 hours to do that, it's easy to just let it fill 8 hours. If you give yourself just 2 hours a week, but multitask, speed it up and skip some stuff, it may be a good tradeoff

Well easiest place to save time is to just stop sleeping so much.

So I work 9-5 7 days a week. That give me about 5 hours of free time every day after work. Thats usualy enought for me with careful planning.

Maybe I'm a little late but I'll tell you my experience.

I don't know how it's in other countries but here in Argentine almost everyone who is in the University also have a job. In my case when I started the University I had a fullday Job, so I leave home at 6.30AM work from 8AM to 5.30PM and after that I went to study from 6.30PM to 10PM. Some days after the university I meet with friends in bars for an hour or two or I went to eat dinner and sleep in my GF's house.

It was hard at the beginning I have to get used to sleep only 5/6 hours in week days and of course my social life got reduced a lot. But now that I finished my studies I have a lot of freetime after work like from 6PM to 11.30PM and I got used to sleep 7 hours a day so I have plenty time to do whatever I want.

Maybe I'm wrong but assuming you are from the US I understand that the common days usually finish by 9/10PM there. For an example I started Boxing a few month ago and I go from 9PM to 10.30PM 3 days a week and after that I have to shower have dinner and some "relaxing time" watching Tv or something like that and I go to bed at 12/12.30AM.

I think people here spend less time sleeping which is bad but I give us time to do other things.

OP your comment is precisely the reason I now choose to work part time in a stupid retail job.

It pays the necessary bills of life, and no, I can't ever afford everything I want.

I don't live in a fancy house or wear fancy clothes.

However, I have time for living and enjoying life with my family and friends (when they are not working).

I can't go on fancy holidays, but I can go for long hikes, excersize, read, movies, games, craft, photography, art etc.

Your time is finite, not limitless. You have to choose where you want to spend your precious time.

Instead of saying "I am too busy to do X" try saying " I choose not to prioritize X" and see how your life changes.

If you don't want to work full time, find a way to live with less money and be happy. It's quite easy.

This is a young person thing in most cases. As you get older you will become more valuable from experience and age. You will get a supervisory position or start your own business. Eventually you’ll start to pay things off and have more control of your time. For now you are paying your dues. It is scary and frustrating now but that is a feature not a bug. That’s how you get wiser and more level headed later on. Hang in there. Time goes by much faster than you think.

Its because not everyone with a full or part time job or career is busy all day every single day with no time off. The stereotype, which does exist for a reason, is that you are a slave to your job and have no time off to do anything else. That simply isnt true. A lot of people either just have enough time off with their work schedule or are able to make the time.

As an 18 year old cook working 50-60 hours a week it’s normal for me to go weeks without a day off. All it really is, is learning how late you can stay up without oversleeping for work and still having enough energy for the shift. Some days I’ll be off at 4 and I get almost 8 hours to myself before I need to sleep (midnight) to be up by 6 the next day it’s just learning how to use the time you have to yourself well.

Create a viable weekly schedule and stick to it as best you can. Meal prep at the beginning of each week for lunches/dinners. Unfortunately being in school is going to be your priority, so less of a social life is kind of expected. When you get a full time job though, going out every night isn't a smart thing to do because you'll want a steady sleep schedule.

Other than that, fuck shit up on Fridays and Saturdays šŸ¤·ā€ā™‚ļø

I know ill get downvoted to shit but. I used to work 12 hour shifts 5 days a week Now i work 2 8s and 2 12s On the days i only work 8 hours.. Even with an hour drive home ( 2 hours round trip) i still have a decent amount of time to get stuff done on my 8 hour days. (Albeit i only get about 7 hours of sleep)

Not that i can enjoy days traveling but i definately have time to enjoy hobbies.

Don't make working a priority. If it's not enjoyable, or isn't worth the money, being poor can be very fulfilling.

The truth is, we're all burnt out. I used to always go out in high school and now I realize how valuable it is to stay home with my family. We don't always do what we want to do but there's always something that we HAVE to do. It's a part of life.

Honestly it's all about balancing and pre-planning and sometimes saying no to certain things.

I have a 40-hour job (or did, yesterday was my last day for a cross-country move) that is four 10-hour days. That gives me enough time to wake up, go to the gym for an hour, get ready for work, actually work, get home, cook dinner, enjoy it with my wife, and still have 1-2 hours for leisure activities before bed to get 8-9 hours of sleep. Fri-Sun I have all day to do whatever I want.

I'm a health inspector for county government in the Bay Area. I'm not making tech money. I don't do any side hustles. I have student debt. Wife and I live alone, no roommates.

You are currently working two full-time jobs: your actual job, then school + studying. Once school is finished you can cut down on work time to make room for everything else. You also have to plan your life well.

Don't live so far from work that you have a long commute. Don't have children early (or at all). Set and maintain an actual sleep schedule. Pick better times to do things; I go to the gym at 5am because it isn't crowded, as opposed to trying to go at 7pm where the workout would take twice as long. Clean as you go.

It isn't difficult or impossible to have plenty of time to live and enjoy life. Anyone who says otherwise has either made it more difficult for themselves or are prioritizing other things that limits them. And don't try to tell me that you were set up to fail; I was dirt poor from birth to 18, my mother ruined my credit before I left home, and I had to take out loans to get through college while working full time. Parts of life suck, but you still gotta set a foundation.

I’m late in commenting here, but I understand. You came for advice right?

Examine your daily routine in detail. There are surely things you are doing that are either inefficient or unnecessary. Something I’ve learned over the years is that I have started to really value my time and do my best to leave as much time for myself (meaning doing the things that are important to me...oil painting, family,..etc.) To do this:

Develop good habits like cleaning up as you walk around. If something is out of place, don’t leave it, fix it.

Put things on the calendar so you have something to look forward to and to help you plan to have fun and visit family.

Do meal prep for the week, it will save you time when you are short.

Prioritize! Everything will not get done, do what is most important and save time for you.

I think some of what you are looking for comes with practice and experience. I was in a similar situation a while back. Working 45-50hrs/wk, 2hr commute round trip, going to school full time and raising a family. My days were 18hrs long from pillow to pillow for a few years. Endure, you are doing yourself a good thing by sticking to your education. Don’t get caught up in FOMO, but do give yourself some time to get out and do something off routine.

Get a job that gives you the weekends off. Your weekdays will be mostly work and home but you can find time for other things if you want. That still leaves you weekends off to spend however you want.

Alternatively you can get a job with a variable work schedule, or one that allows you to work from home.

In the end the real trick is getting your free time to line up with your friends free time. As you get older and people get into different industries with different work schedules that can get complicated.

Personally I work, go home, then knock out 2 "chores" Mon-Fri. Once I've done that I'm free to do whatever else I'd like. Allows me plenty of time to relax after work and gets enough done during the week that my weekends stay relatively responsibility free outside of "major" things I have to deal with.

You'll have more freedom as an adult. Anyone who promised you more downtime was liar or a fool though. You just have to learn to prioritize your free time and do things "worth" doing when you get it.

Get a job working from home. Not always easy but doable.

I basically worked like this until I got really good at certain niche jobs and now I work for myself mostly from home on my own schedule.

It also helps not living in the US, you guys get shafted something awful with the amount of hrs you have to work and the little time off you get.

Move to Europe where there's way better working laws and WAY more holidays.

Idk man. It’s all blood money for me. I work in the Hollywood film and television industry and we frequently do 70-80 hour weeks, 60 being an average week. We are compensated very well for our time and the toll it takes on our health, but still it’s madness. Might as well work hard while your young though I suppose. Soon enough your back just can’t hack it.

We don’t

I wondered the same when I was in college and now that I've been in the real world for some years, I realized that the time I was using either studying/writing papers/doing homework and tbh actively procrastinating studying/writing papers/doing homework, is now my free-time outside of work. I have more time now than I ever had and that's even with all of the adulty chores/errands that I have to do and going to the gym for an hour plus 4-6 times a week. For reference, I work your average 9-5, M-F office job, and get a 1 hour lunch break. I'm sure some of my feelings are due to the fact that:

  1. When I leave the office for the day, I don't have access to my work e-mail or any of my work materials. My work stays at work and I don't think about work after 5 PM.
  2. Now that I don't have to do any school work, my lunch break is an actual break where I can just mess around on the internet, take a walk, listen to a podcast or music, read a book, eat, etc.
  3. My SO has a very flexible schedule so we get to see each other a lot.
  4. My hobbies/interests are mostly things I do at home (so I'm not going out often), I don't drink anymore (so I'm not going to bars/clubs), and aren't part of any extra curriculars that take up a lot of time.

I will say, however, it can be a bit depressing when I'm getting home 6:30, 7, sometimes 8 PM and realize that if I want a decent night's sleep I only get a few hours during the week to do what I want. Still 10000% times better than school AND I get to do what I want usually on weekends so it's not really that bad.

Don’t underestimate how much time being a student takes up. It’s like a second full-time job. Imagine what you could do if you only worked during the week and had your weekends to yourself — you could catch up on chores and prepare meals for the next week, with time for friends and hobbies as well. School never really ends because you can always study more; one main benefit of working a regular job is that once you come home, you are done.

I also wouldn’t underestimate how much your commute affects your day. If you have an hour commute, then that 9-5 becomes an 8-6. If people manage to have shorter commutes, then they can have a significant amount of extra time.

How long is your commute? Why does it take you so long to prepare for work?

Customer service jobs offer huge variability in what you have to every day and the kind of people you get to interact with! But the pay is pretty consistent...

I think your problem is that you don't have a weekend because of school. I remember feeling the same way when i went to class 4 days a week and worked 6 days a week. But, now I'm a regular office slave and I have plenty of time after work (3:30pm-10pm) to do whatever I want. Plus, with weekends being open it gives me plenty of time to do anything.

It's the school part that seperates you from others. Remove the school and studying from the equation and then you only have 2/3 things from that list.

I say 2/3 because "doing laundry, cleaning, grocery shopping, getting gas, etc" should really be combined with being home after work. Thats' more time management.

Well you attend school, so there’s your free time mate.

I have worked since I was 14 (now 35). I have never felt like I didn't have free time. I work full time, go to school and still have time for the gym, and taking my kids to go do things. I even spend a full weekend a month doing national guard as well. You might be mismanaging your time. But as an adult with a full time job, finally going to college 18 years after dropping out of school and 2 kids I have plenty of free time to do the things I want.

I don't do it anymore, I cut my week down to 4 days and I do 8-4pm.

They live in places like France.

Oh god I'm gonna be going back to school and getting a job, rip my time.

I work nights, so there's a kick in the balls for trying to plan anything with anyone. My fiance is the same, so we have to plan everything around everyone else's schedules. My hours can be anywhere from 40-60 hours a week, sometimes more, depending on how busy it can get at work. We'll get some time to ourselves in our, "evening" (which is at like 600am), and then off to bed. I generally try and see my family once a week, with an hour commute to their place. I feel you, it's very difficult to schedule time for extra activities at all.

Dude, no idea. My boyfriend leaves work at 5.30pm and if he's lucky, he arrives home at 6.15 pm and honestly, sometimes if I want to do sm stuff, I got to pick him up or do that shit by myself. I have a drivers license, he will be getting one soon, too. But I often ask myself how the hell he used to live before I picked him up and came up with some ideas to brighten up our day, etc. It's tough man, but it gets better. Take care. ā¤ļø

I wonder this sometimes too. I see so many people saying things like "I work a full time job and I'm also in grad school full time". Fucking how?

Try to get excited about your work. You will become the job and it will feel totally different. Example, I cannot imagine a part-time surgeon who works only two days and is not involved in the field in his spare time. Otoh, if you only want something to do to get money with, you'll end up with a boring job that noone wants.

You "Feel the Bern" don't you? I/we have something you want but you don't necessarily want to work hard to get it, and we all understand it to a certain point, but this is the point in your life where you decide to work hard to achieve your goals or say fuck it and go down that path that makes you think you deserve what other people have but aren't about to work as hard as they did to get it so you'll base your political beliefs on the "party" that you believe will take the wealth away from the rich and just give it to you because, well, you want it and believe you deserve to have whatever "it" is. It's your decision, work hard and reap the benefits of your labor or be a loser and decide it's much easier to get crumbs from the government by doing nothing and bitching about everything...it's your choice.

You just be tired all the time.

So i work full time and have 2 kids, married. I have hobbies i do after work. My commute is about 20 minutes each way so 40 minutes. I work my 8 hours, sometimes more sometimes less, im a programmer so my work varies, but always evens out to 40 a week. I got my kids into my hobbies. So that opens the hobbies to be family time too. Kids go to bed, so at that point i have time for not kid friendly stuff. My wife goes to bed earlier then i do, so daily i have about 2 hours of absolute me time, where i catch up with friends or just relax.

What im saying is, college was alot harder and alot more consuming for me then job life is. I graduated in 2013, im 29 years old, dont know if that makes me too old to be used as an example, but i dont feel old yet. Working post uni is easy. XD

Hope i have at least given some hope.

You're going to school. That's a big time investment between classes, schoolwork, and studying. And also makes it hard to settle into a routine because you might have different projects or things to work on.

A 40-hour work week really isn't that terrible because you can settle into a routine and make things pretty efficient. Additionally, most full-time jobs starting out come with at least two weeks of vacation, often three, plus sick time.

So if you work 9 hours a day, 5 days a week, and sleep for 8 hours every night, That's still 67 hours a week. The time is there. And seriously, once you're done with the chaos of school and can find a routine with a job, it makes it a lot easier to plan and schedule things.

Waking up early to do some of those chores or studying before work could be huge. I started getting up early to hit the gym before work and while it does suck at first, it's worth getting home and being free at 5:30 instead of after 7

It's super difficult.

I know you've gotten plenty of answers, but I want to add my two cents.

I work full time. 9-5 Monday-Thursday, 9-4:30 on Friday. I also volunteer at my local firehouse. That means Mondays and Wednesdays I'm busy 7-9, and first Thursday of every month I'm busy 7-9. I'm pursuing a second bachelors degree (bumping up my GPA) and am also going to start pursuing my masters of education in the fall which will see me 1) starting a class that goes 4:30-6:30 once a week and 2) taking time out of work (my lunch hour) to commit to fieldwork and 3) finding time to do homework. I also have a girlfriend.

Balancing all of these is difficult to say the least. My Tuesday and Thursday nights I usually don't have any commitments (that is if we don't have a fire call!) and I use them to complete homework. Sometimes I'll let my homework go until Sunday and complete it then. Fridays after work I usually hang out with my girlfriend and sleep over with her into Saturday and sometimes Sunday and sometimes those days would be dedicated to family events or vacations depending on the weekend.

I don't necessarily have a social life as much as I used to. I only really ever hang out with my girlfriend and family. My friends that I used to hang out with I haven't seen since I started my full time job (maybe once or twice, not including the times I stop into their work to say hi). My downtime is usually a few hours at night after I'm done with homework and/or firehouse duties and the weekends.

As for those 48 hours on Saturday and Sunday, yeah you don't always get those to just relax and recharge. I try to dedicate at least one weekend in a one month time to just chill and do nothing. Sometimes I don't get that weekend for a month/2 months.

You can find time. There is always time to spare, whether it seems like it or not. Hell, I'm at work right now and managed to type this out. If you learn to manage your time appropriately, you can fit more things into your day/week than you think you can.

As for my life, I know it'll all calm down eventually. I gotta work hard to make it, right? I'm hoping that after I'm done with my masters in the fall of 2021, I'm able to get a good job and settle down. 2 years away, meaning 2 years of this. It's a lot to take in, especially now reading that... But I know in the end all this stress and hard work will be worth it.

To be honest, it’s really hard. I’m working 40 hours Monday to Friday. I have to pick up my kids from daycare and the commute to work is 1,5 hours long. So I spend over 3 hours every day commuting. After that it is eating and putting the kids to bed. Then I have a few hours left to Netflix, work out or pursue hobbies.

This is why I’m constantly on the lookout for other possibilities. I’m heavily considering not working one day a week, but I don’t know if we’ll manage without a full time job...

If you sleep 8 hours EVERY night (which hardly anyone does), and work 40 hours a week (which many including myself do), leaves you 72 hours of free time. That's three solid days (more if you are some rare person that sleeps a full 8 hours a night) to do things.

I used to work a 75+ hour/week job, and I still found time to do things in the evenings or on weekends (when I had a weekend day off).

I think you're underestimating how much time school takes up. When I got out of college I rememeber thinking my favorite part of not being in school anymore was not having to do homework.

Weekends just make it a point to do something on one of your days off

From what I've seen with friends/family, something gets neglected. Cleaning, physical appearance, cooking, socializing, etc., at least one thing is going to dropped to make room for the more important ones to that person. I'm unable to work due to health issues and it's the only reason my husband and I's place is always clean and most of our meals are home-cooked.

A typical weekday schedule for me in my full time job:

Midnight-6am - Sleep
6am-7am - Wake up routine
7am-8am - Drive to work
8am-4:30pm - Work (browse Reddit)
4:30pm-5:30pm - Drive home
5:30pm-Midnight - Whatever the fuck I want

6 hours sleep and over 6 hours every evening to do whatever I want and that's just weekdays. Maybe I spend 3 hours of those cumulative 30 hours cleaning and I'll spend 4 of those hours doing martial arts. Still got 23 hours (over 4 hours on average per evening) to play video games. Obviously other events will randomly pop up, like maybe I'll need to spend an hour going to buy some shoes or I'll spend the entire evening just on a date with my partner, but I still have multiple hours almost every day to just do whatever else.

Then I have weekends on top of all that! I recognise I have a pretty damn good deal in life and I'm very lucky to not really have any extra worries. Not having any kids probably allows me to have as much free time as I do as well.

Prioritise what's important and do your best to live a happy and stress-lite life.

Don't have kids. Otherwise this will be your life forever.

This is temporary. If you succeed in acquiring your degree and a job where your pay matches your skill, 40-50 hours a week is about all you’ll need to invest. Additionally, there comes a point where you will decide to dedicate your time to what you want to do. Eventually paying others to do household tasks you don’t want to do.

Aim high and push. You can do it!

Get off social media as a start?

Sacrifice. I work full time and go to college full time and you will always have to sacrifice something. I sleep usually 6 hours a day max and put minimal effort into getting ready so that I can start my day even earlier. I don't know what kind of job you do, but efficiency is absolutely key not only for work, but for everything. If you can complete tasks as efficient as possible, you can move on to something else. If people in your life are upset that you can't hang out with them all the time, they aren't your friends because no matter how long that you go without seeing them, you should still be able to pick up where you left off with them. It gets easier.

Im also at college but not working atm. Youre a full time student and working a job too. full time student is already "full time" because of the amount of time u have to put in after class. your schedule might be spread out and all over like mine as well where u get stuck at school 11 hours a day too ya know? Once school is over time will be a bit easier to maintain.

I work fifty hours a week and it’s hard sometimes to prioritize otherwise when I find myself with down time it’s time for bed or I just relax for a few and waste time on Reddit or Facebook.

Some things that help: -my iPhone lets me set time limits on apps so I don’t waste time. -I force myself to get in exercise through others- I do FitBit races with friends so it reminds me to stay on my feet and move even during my work day. -I hire a maid for every other weekend to keep up on deep cleaning that I can’t. -find people at or around work to hang out with- some of my best times were just dipping over to a buddy’s house after work before going home. -ALWAYS make time for family, no matter what the cost. You have to have time off somewhere. As someone who recently lost a parent, I’m telling you: find the time. It’s there. Even if it’s a phone call.

Ehh I dunno a 40 hour week left me plenty of time to do stuff. I get bored in the winter time so I usually work two jobs (70-80hour work weeks) on the summer I’m at the pool every day with just one job. I’m

I personally set a goal for myself and will work myself into the ground getting to it then cut back drastically until I feel motivated to repeat the process.

I'm currently working 50 - 75 hour weeks with a good portion of that being in a new industry (working property maintenance, getting a foot into construction). I hope to acquire a house in a local suburb that's in need of a great deal of renovations and work my way through that for fun. I then intend to dedicate a good portion of the hours I'm currently working to pursuing luthier and general woodworking as a hobby and side hustle.

I personally like to keep a side plan for if I reach a burn out point before I get to my goal. My burn out relief plan is to hold my savings and pursue hiking and climbing for a brief duration because they interest me and are low cost.

People value work way way to much here. I work so I can live I dont live to work. So many people have it backwards and you're right they work so much it becomes their identity and they lose everything else they once loved in their life until work is their only identity. People who are willing to put up with that kind of life also make it so other people have to be ok with that kind of treatment while working and set it as the industry standard.

I have plenty of time, I only eat one meal a day, sleep 5 hours a night, and don't work on weekends.

There's also time to relax after an 8-10 hour work day as I only live 30 mins from my job.

I only take about 10 mins to get ready for work, so I have time to mess around when I wake up.

Honestly, when there's something I really wanna do, I find the time.

If I didn't have a girlfriend, I would have the magical free time you speak of. We currently live apart since she's on her last semester (week technically lol) of college so. We see eachother probably 4/5 days out of the week. If I didn't drive to go see her/stay the night, my week would look like this:

Monday-Friday: wake up at 7, get to work by 8. leave at 5, home by 5:30. do anything I feel like until bed at 11.

Friday: might go hangout with some friends to drink.

Saturday: same as friday but without the work.

Sunday: video games all day baBYYYYY.

I finished school so no need to worry about that. I eat once a day because I sit on my ass all day at work and at home so I don't want to be fat. Might get a snack like cereal or a 10pc from BK later in the evening.

American here, I heard some countries have 30 hour work weeks, paid so much to remain happy and rested and get paid paternal leave for a month. However I find that working 40 hours a week is almost perfect. I don’t have many friends so I don’t worry about making time to socialize too much, I’m doing intermittent fasting 20:4 so I only eat during a small time frame, can’t shit anywhere but my house, sleep is usually not an easy thing for me but I wish I could sleep midnight-8am I usually only get like 4 hours. Basically if you want a life working a full schedule you have to sacrifice something or a little bit of multiple things, and sometimes you can’t sacrifice anything for anything then everyone just has to deal with it unless you do something like quitting for your mental health

I didn't know community college offered bachelor's degrees.

I’m in go mode all the time and I still can’t figure it out. I’m about to hire a housekeeper here and there because I just can’t keep this up.

I'll tell you what, time only gets shorter and shorter once you marry and have kids.

I felt the same way for a long time while I was in college full time and working a full time and part time job. I went into teaching and now I love having weekends, holidays, and Summers off. Once you graduate, that will free up a lot of time.

Used to work 3 jobs at a total of 80 something hours a week. I did absolutely nothing fun. I said fuck it to makeup after two months and ended up doing the whole: wake up, go to work, come home, cry a little, go to other work, go to other other work, come home, hopefully shower, go to sleep, repeat.

I now work two jobs for 50 something hours and I go out for dinner/drinks with work friends on Fridays, occasionally go to the bars with my boyfriend and friends on Saturdays, and stay home and snuggle with my boyfriend on Sundays (and people come to my house to watch got). Any other social activities are probably going to be a no from me.

I feel a fuck ton better than before and am significantly less miserable and tired and angry, but it still kinda sucks to see everyone having fun and doing things without me. And even if I found the time, I probably couldn’t afford it.

Makes me hope that eventually my degree will pay off and I’ll be able to live happily and comfortably.

P.s. I have like 6 loads of laundry that need to be done at all times. Which I barely ever do.

Sometimes you gotta make time to do nothing.

Okay I literally feel like I'm taking crazy pills reading this thread. Everyone is talking about how they're also going to school, or have a second job, etc. And I sympathize with that, there was a time when I also had work and school, and had almost no free time. But that's not "full time", that's more than "full time".

"Full time" is 40hrs a week.

So I work 8hrs a day, and have about 5hrs of free time in the evening for hanging out, hobbies, tv, etc.

Don't forget about that evening time, OP. The weekends aren't your only free time.

And then on weekends I usually spend about half a day cleaning, doing laundry, and meal prepping. The rest of the weekend is more free time to mess around.

Oh, just wait until you get to the point of working all the time with no time leftover for anything except barely enough to rush through laundry/groceries/cleaning but still don't make enough money to pay your rent and bills.

The bonus is that any time you mention it to an employer that you need a raise to survive they will either fire you or offer you something illegal like 'half off the books' .

And if you vent to an 'adult' of the 'boomer' generation they will just say that you are not working hard enough/are entitled dispite the statistics that 20-30 somethings today are working more than 5+ times the hours as their generation had to as 20-30 somethings to cover life essentials.

Ah, the American Dream!

For me it got easier after college, because I didn't have to go class and finish homework/study anymore. Working a 9-5, 40 hours a week leaves me plenty of time to spend with my wife or finish watching a show, playing, or reading etc etc. Time management is just the key. That advice is easier to give than to do, but once you find the rhythm it is not bad at all.

I finished school got my degree I didnt has any social live nor time for my self while studying. And now I work about 240hours a month.. And I dont have any time for myself Life sux when u poor

r/antiwork

Find a job that feels like a hobby. You won't feel like you're wasting your time going into work every day, and won't be miserable when you leave.

This is the attitude that my girlfriend has. She wants to come home and watch TV shows every night then have movie marathons on the weekend. Meanwhile I'm pulling 30 foot long branches out of the power lines to the house at 830 on a Wednesday night, planting and maintaining the yard most other nights. Doing house repairs or cleaning the floors like I did last night. Performing surgery on the laminate flooring that has now bubbled up, clearing the birds out of the attic and patching the holes, cleaning the gutters, trees, or dishes inside. I just moved in three months ago, she hasnt done any of these things in 4 years....

If you want or need to do something, you will make time for it. You are in college and your time is correctly taken by work and study, keep it up and one of these days you'll realize how busy you are and just want to take a night off.....

P.s. you should always make time for game of thrones

If possible, working from home at least one day a week makes a big difference. I had an hour commute into the city (Boston) for my job. After a few years there I requested to work from home on Fridays and it was granted. I loved those Fridays. I felt more productive, got cleaning/laundry done during the day. I would even do the grocery shopping.

None of these tasks interfered with my work. My job as a video editor offered many opportunities to multi-task. I have to export and compress a video file? Take a shower.

Another benefit is that I could start work around the time I'd be leaving for work. Thus I could end my day and hour early. So I could get a head start on a weekend trip to Maine if I wanted.

Towards the end of my time there a new project manager came in and wanted me to start coming back into the office on Fridays. That was a dagger to the heart and entirely unnecessary. Frankly it pissed me off and was one of the straws that broke the camel's back. I left shortly after. This leads to another way to balance your personal/work life:

Don't be burdened with debt that makes you a slave to your job. I just turned 50. I didn't follow this advice when I was young. I regret it now. I wiped out all of my debt in my late 30s and then found I didn't need as much money as I thought I did to be happy. This opened up a lot of options for me. We were renting an apartment. My wife and I quit our jobs and moved to another country to live and work for a few years. We moved to Puerto Rico in 2017 and (aside from catastrophic hurricanes) are living the good life. We'll be opening a school soon. We don't have much money but I'm no less happy than when were bringing in around $120,000 (before taxes) combined in Boston. We did this with about $10,000 in savings. The only way we could have done it is to be debt-free. To think we were considering buying a home a few months earlier!

That's why they always told us to do what we love. To find a job we enjoy, because it will dominate our lives. So much of our identity in western society is our work. Our contribution. I think about it sometimes too. I have become very dedicated to my work and spend so much time on it. But I am lucky enough to do something I love.

I have a a full time job with overtime and a second job on the weekends. I also go to college. It's not so much about having time as it is about making time. You just have to figure out how to schedule things better and find shortcuts to make things more efficient.

I'm up at 430. My morning routine Including workout and shower takes me until 6ish. I have an hour and a half of free time till I have to leave for work. I'm usually out of work by 6 (I get a bit of overtime each day) hone by 630. I have 2is hours to relax, eat, spend time with hubby. That's 3.5 hours a day free time, plus the weekend. It's not ideal, but it is doable.

I work full time as a barber. I play rollerderby, dance, own dogs and volunteer outside of it.

It's a full plate but it's all time management, I drink my coffee while I walk my dogs. I eat, do my makeup, and catch up on email stuff on the bus. Meal prepping is LIFE and I'll do that twice a week for my lunches and dinners at least, and while things cook tidy up and do laundry.

Learn to double up and use a schedule! Even if it's just to write stuff down it helps keep everything in order for your brain!

Part of it is that you're in college and working a job. College is basically a part or full time job. So your basically working two jobs.

You'll have time when you're not studying anymore. College is time consuming not only because of classes but homework, projects and extra studying. I already graduated and I had to find new hobbies to invest my time in lol. It gets better :)

The secret is 5 hours of sleep

Its called the weekend jabroni.

I think about this all. the. time. I'm not in school anymore, and I work a full time and part time job to make ends meet. I do manage to squeeze in a social call about once a week, sometimes more if you count dinner at my sister's place to hang with her.

But if you want to do anything extra, like fucking read a book, or exercise, or do any fucking thing that people enjoy doing, you have to sacrifice something else. Sleep? Eating? Idk. How do people do it? How do parents do it? How do single parents do it??? Does not compute.

I totally get it. But you’re studying and working as well. Once you finish studying and it’s just working full time you’ll be fine. I do 40 hours a week and I still find plenty of time to get shit done. However that being said, I love routine. Thursday nights I go shopping and then dinner (this is my me time), Friday night is date night, Saturday is social/fiends time. Then Sunday is food prep/cleaning catch ups etc. The rest I’m at work and gym. If I wasn’t a creature of habit I think I’d be fucked šŸ˜‚

I work a 8-4 M-F job. I also:

  • race cars

  • do photography

  • hike

  • go to the gym

  • plan trips with my friends

  • go out of state on weekends for the hell of it

  • and for the last 10 years I've had a "friend's night" every single Friday

Now I'm single and I know people have more on their plate. But sitting and complaining isn't going to fix anything so you might as well make some lifestyle changes that allow you to enjoy what you have. I have one hell of a gaming PC that sits there unused most days because I would rather be out doing things to better myself than sitting on the PC all the time. It's a matter of priority in many cases.

Ask yourself:

  • How many hours do you really need to "recharge"?

  • Is there an activity you can do that allows you to recharge that isn't just sitting at home?

  • Am I just being lazy? (this is a hard question to answer because we're good at lying to ourselves)

  • What would I be doing given more free time? (If you can't think of anything, then that's the real reason you never get to do anything)

I have a full-time job (9 to 18, 1 hour lunch break).

That means about 55% of my waking time is "free", and the other 45% is work during a normal week. That's not as bad as people seem to think

For me it's not bad at all since I love my work and find it extremely interesting.

That's more than enough time to do everything i want to do, and that doesn't take into account holidays.

I worked two jobs while going to college full time, my senior year for instance I was bartending about 30 hr a week and also working 20 hr at a paid internship before and after classes. I felt like I was constantly working between actual work and school (I did Comm Design so it was mostly projects). It felt like I could work and never save money because it was minimum wage, granted bartending I’d often make $100+ a shift and the internship was $11/hr but I was never able to save between rent, bills, school, food, etc. I thought this loop was going to be the death of me. I remember working while taking summer classes and I went 43 days straight between my two jobs and school without a day or weekend off.

I’m finished with that now, working a full-time 40hr a week job and it’s a breath of fresh air to actually make and save money. A plus side of not being in school anymore is after you’re finished at work (depending on your job) you get those next 7 or 8 or so hours to do what you want and then you basically just look forward to the weekends. I really enjoy my job so I don’t have a problem with working 8 hr a day.

As far as ā€œliveā€ what exactly do you define that as? You can definitely live and work full time. I’m about a year at this company and have two weeks paid vacation, my girlfriend and I already had our yearly ski trip, we are going to Florida twice in the next couple months, I’ll be in NY in June. It’s not the easiest you just have to plan vacations wisely. This of course isn’t my long term goal but it’s comfortable compared to when I was busting my ass harder than I am now and not making anything to show for it.

Life is a grind, save, invest, be wise with your money, don’t get credit cards unless you’re building credit (don’t get that shit so you can max it out each month and pay the minimum) a lot of hobbies can be inexpensive, I play coed soccer three times a week and it doesn’t cost much. Finding new hobbies in my new city with my best friend by my side is the route I’m headed down and it’s exciting. It gets better after the school grind.

That's pretty much how it works, although I think once you're done with school, you'll feel *a little* bit better. Adults with normal 40-50 hour/week jobs (and no kids) tend to not have much free time for hobbies/down time, but they do have a little. It sounds like you literally have none, which is very, very different from even having just a couple hours per week. Now that I'm only working full time instead of full time + school, I am much, much happier. I get so mad when I hear people tell working college/grad students "just wait until you get into the real world. Then you'll know exhaustion." Like, no. My life is so much easier now that I'm no longer in school.

School + work is more hectic than just work. I graduated, got a job and then did grad school while working full time. It sucked. Now I’m done, and I have lots of time outside work.

Basically, 4:30 until I go to bed, 5 days a week is free time. Plus all weekends, holidays and easier schedule on remote work days. Adult life isn’t bad. Just gotta get school behind you.

You get extremely good at time management... And there's weeks and months, and even years that you just don't have the time to do things..... Every kid wants to be an adult until they get close and realize it sucks hahaha

I felt this way at my old job which was 6 days/50 hours per week while I was still in school. Since moving to a 9-5 M-F I feel like I have tons of extra time.

The best things that helped me get a bit more time were grocery shopping once a week, laundry every 2 weeks, meal prep all my lunches on Sundays, commuting by bike which acted as my work outs and the biggest time saver for me was stopping drinking. According my sobriety app I've saved 200 hours of time by not drinking the last 7 months.

Another key for me was living within cycling distance of my job which was about 15 minutes by car or 28-30 minutes by bike. Effectively getting me an hour of working out but only sacrificing 30 minutes of extra time.

The key is to have a fascinating, fulfilling job.

I think that we have more time available and waste more time than we realize. A family member of mine has managed to raise five kids while getting and ARNP degree, keeps a clean home and manages to maintain friendships and social life. But. . . she is always on the move, constantly working to maintain her home, staying on top of and not letting it get out of order. She also spends little time online, which I believe is a huge time waster for many folks. Oh, and she also keeps a calendar regularly, making the most of every minute.

It's not that bad. What was really a killer is when I was working full time (40+ hrs), going to school in the evenings for my MBA and had a 6 year old. I had absolutely no life for that time period. When I was done with school, I had to figure out what to do with all of my free time!

All relationships are conducted online and at your convenience.

I’m so lonely. :(

It's up to you which path you choose to follow.

If you like the consumer lifestyle, with a warm house filled with things, a car, fast wifi, gadgets etc.. then keep clocking those hours.

There's other options, some not so comfortable. I've lived in my truck, worked part time jobs while traveling, and while it felt very free and rewarding I burned out quick and went back to my safe comfy apartment, waking up to an alarm everyday.

You're right, that there should be some balance, I have not found it, if you do let me know.

ā€œYou buy furniture. You tell yourself, this is the last sofa I will ever need in my life. Buy the sofa, then for a couple years you're satisfied that no matter what goes wrong, at least you've got your sofa issue handled. Then the right set of dishes. Then the perfect bed. The drapes. The rug. Then you're trapped in your lovely nest, and the things you used to own, now they own you.ā€
― Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club

Alot of profesions offer alot more flexibility these days with the advent of the internet, so many people dont work a full 40.

Also, having a partner helps eliminate some of the duplicate efforts which can free up more time.

And you stop going to school which eats up alot of time. I know alot of people say school os easier than work, but I found the opposite. Once I left school and focused on work full time I felt I had more free time and the resources to enjoy that time fully.

Also 2 hrs is way to long to be getting ready every time you need to go somewhere, you Basicly just lost 14hrs. See if you could cut that time in half.

Being new to a full time job and working 40+ hours sometimes, I 100% understand. I’m the kind of person who starts to get physically sick after I’m on the go too much.

I feel ya

I’m in the same boat I’m at the office 5 days a week my only days off is wensdays which is my school day and Sunday which is my catch up on hw and errands

I dont know what your job is, but if it doesnt require you to look in tip top shape to be there (if its minimum wage i doubt it does) then you shouldnt spend 2 hours getting ready and im not trying to bash you but you need to prioritize your time better if you feel like you youre not getting enough you-time.

TLDR:Try not to work 9-5. If you can shift earlier or later.

There aren't many things in this world I fear more than a 9-5 job 5 days a week. Unless you're a super early riser you can't get anything super productive done before work. By the time you get home you're tired and it's possibly dark out making you want to just eat and relax. By the end of the week you have so many chores built up you spend one of your weekends doing errands and chores. Maybe you get 1 totally free weekend day to do whatever. That's a 6 to 1 trade off. No thanks.

My job schedule is super flexible and closer to 1-1 trade off if not more off than on. But for those who have jobs that can start very early (maybe 5am) or very late (maybe 2-3pm) you should do it. When I'm on one of these shifts I'm able to do long workouts before or after work, any chores or errands, and feel like I have plenty of quality free time.

You don't.

I had an hour between the gym and work just now and I spent it posting on reddit. That was my recreation for the day. It's an hour drive to work, 9 hours, an hour drive home, then bed. That's adult life. You just avoid death another day. Congratulations, you're a grownup now.

Lol I work 70 hours a week on SFA in NZ and still have time for hunting, gaming and knife making. The key is cutting out activities considered "necessary" E. G: toothbrushing, grooming, house maintenance, relationship maintenance, etc

I haven't had a real day off in six years, only had a lunch break at work twice this week (pretty typical). I go in at 5 am and leave at 230. I pick my daughters up at 330 and get them home and start dinner and cleaning bottles and lunch boxes until about 530 when my wife gets home. I do my homework (yes still get homework at 34 years old) until about 930 and try to be asleep by 1030. The weekends are even busier since you only have 48 hours to do productive things like laundry and cleaning, car repairs, yardwork, etc. so I only get between 9 pm and 2 am on saturday nights to do anything I want to do. Which is usually play xbox with some buddies that I don't get to see very often.

You get numb to the grind and you eventually learn to appreciate the smallest things, like a really good song while you scrub dishes or cooking something new for you and the mrs. while you cook whatever the kids are going to eat. One thing I really miss is fishing, having time to spend four to eight hours on a body of water just enjoying the day. I bet it will be another 16 years before I can enjoy fishing again

I work 4-10s. It’s true I usually only have time to make food for dinner and next days lunch but I can usually sneak in a bike ride after work. I have 3 day weekend though.

OP You don’t have because of school. Once that is finished it should feel like you have tons more free time.

Basically yes, is go, go....but it all depends on the hours you work. I used to work 5 days a week from 6 to 2 which it wasn't bad at all. And now, I work 13 hour shifts which gives me 4 days off and I love it. I'm also in school full time which is still gives me plenty of free time! Is a matter of finding a job with hours that fits you, which can be hard but not impossible!

So glad people are recognizing how bullshit capitalism is.

I work a professional full time job and am working on a masters fulltime as well. I also have a social life and hobbies I enjoy. The reason I can do this is because everyone on all sides knows that I'm busy and I'm passionate about what I do.

I think the real problem is that in our society people are doing jobs they hate that sap them of their physical and mental health/energy, leaving them tired and unable to do the things they enjoy. I chose a job and degree that I'm passionate about, so when I have time off I do not feel absolutely exhausted.

I recommend finding a job/internship that pertains to your degree. You'll gain experience that'll help you get a professional job once you graduate, make the money you need, and hopefully be a little happier doing something you enjoy.

I don't have time. I keep myself sane because I have my wife that I can talk to at the end if the day. We hardly ever are able to do anything because we are working a collective 5 jobs and I am going to school full time.

We do feel burnt out, but we have goals and are working toward them.

Still, we try to do things when there is time (holidays, random days off). It is a grind. It is not for everyone.

The things that fill my time are also things that energize me. Playing games with my mates isn't draining, it's energizing. Lifting Weights, energizing. Taking my kid to the movies. Energizing.

Sometimes I do stuff that's tiring too, getting the car repaired, replacing the toilet tank, painting for my in-laws. That stuff pulls from the reserves, but most of my scheduled time is stuff I've chosen to fill my schedule with, because it puts a bounce in my step.

One trick I like is to use chore time for podcasts or phone conversations with people I like. If I can fold laundry/do dishes and rock out to punk? That's pretty decent too.

I don't have time for anything. Wife and I both work full time plus my wife works one night a week at a part time job. My son has soccer practice every Monday and Wednesday and my daughter has soccer practice Tuesday and Thursday. They both have games Saturday and Sunday, usually at different times and different parts of the state. My son takes guitar lessons and my daughter takes horseback riding lessons and she volunteers at a horse rescue shelter.

By the time I cook and clean up from dinner and make everybody's lunches for the next day, it's usually 10pm when I can finally sit down and usually go to bed around 11ish.

Between all that I need to find time to clean the bathrooms, do laundry, remodel a bathroom, vacuum, take to dog for a walk, mow the lawn and everything else.

6am comes and the cycle starts over. The worst part is although we make decent money, we still live paycheck to paycheck and are struggling to make ends meet.

Paramedic Student Here, I have a full time job working 24s every 3rd day, 7am-7am. Leave work, go to school. 9-1630. Go home , girlfriend +kid. Day 3 preceptor rides 7 am to 1900. Days not doing preceptor rides, I have a 2nd EMS job.

Well, I think the current work system is broken. It's from the industrial age and we've moved past that buy our working time has not. There you go, cold hard capitalism

Yeah, they do generally have more time (at least until they have kids) because they don't have school. I had plenty of time for fun and stuff after school but before I started a family. When your schooling is done you'll have your weekends back. Otherwise, yeah, there's less time to do stuff as an adult.

Hi, I work full time and go to school. It is very hard to have free time but I still manage to maintain my life. This is how I deal with it.

1) Never have zero time. Zero time is when you are on Reddit, on Facebook, playing a stupid video game, watching a dumb show or doing nothing. For most people, this can be several hours a day. If you cut this out of your life, you will not miss it. You don't need to do this to 'decompress'. There is more productive things that you can do to relax.

2) School and studying will take up an unlimited amount of time if you let it. It is important to study but if you prioritize it first then you will get nothing else done. Don't take more than 2 classes per semester.

3) Routinely do your hobbies/groceries/social time directly after work. EVERYDAY, you will get of work at 5-6PM then spend an hour or two doing something. Don't go directly home. This could also be the time you eat dinner. If you get a meal out of it, then it doesn't take any extra time to visit grandma.

4) Avoid cooking because it can take a ton of time. Go out to eat, cook things that are quick (meatless dishes) or eat things raw (fruits and veg).

5) In the evenings, after a long productive day, spend that time on homework and studying. When you procrastinate, you spend the time studying instead doing a zero-time activity and then you force yourself to do the work at the very end. In this way, you cut out the procrastinating part. You can't procrastinate because you are out of time. You already spend that time doing something productive.

6) Don't sleep in on the weekends. It screws up your sleep schedule and makes you less productive. Instead, wake up on your normal time and get stuff done.

My job is weekdays 8-5, rarely with any work after 5pm. I get home around 530, and go to bed at 1030, wake up at 630. I basically have 5 hours to cook and do whatever I want or need to when I get home, so I'd say I still have a life.

I will say though that I'm relatively stable financially, and I think this plays a big role in it, too. You're also taking classes and working part time, which could certainly amount to more hours then a full time job would require.

Try to streamline your time before work so that you can sleep later, which would then give you more time at night for other things, be that errands, chores, or fun. Pick out your clothes the day before, or maybe even a few days’ worth of outfits before the start of your work week. See what parts of your morning routine you can live without or make simpler. Granted I don’t wear makeup, but my alarm goes off 45 minutes before I have to be out the door.

Prepare food in large quantities. Eliminating the ā€œwhat’s for dinner?ā€ predicament AND a few cumulative hours of cooking saves a lot of time?and mental energy. Also make shopping lists.

Have one day that’s laundry day. Have another day that’s food shopping day. Respect them. Treat them like firm appointments.

Keep a calendar. Whether it’s a physical planner or just your phone doesn’t matter. Make plans a week+ in advance and keep them. Don’t try to just find time - make the time. Once it gets written down, shift the rest of your plans for off time to accommodate.

One of the biggest things I learned about trying to balance a 40+ hr a week job AND a social life AND my physical needs is that stuff doesn’t just happen. Spontaneous visits to grandma’s house don’t just work their way in to your schedule - you have to make the schedule yourself and then stick to it. The more you physically write out how you’re going to spend your time, the easier it will be in the future.

It’s hard, but you can do it!

We don't

The higher up the chain you work, the less work you actually perform. Learning to delegate is a big part of this, and you can delegate tasks in your personal life as well. This is the case in some industries but bot all.

You know what. I see how everyone is giving tips on how to manage your life in order to do the things you like and that is definitely useful.

But your initial complaint is very valid. We do spend most of our lives at work and that’s fucked up!

With automation we will be able to work less while more stuff gets done (by robots and machines). We just have to make sure we distribute work so that everyone can earn money to live. It will be great time and it is already happening! We have to push a 30-hour work week!

I normally do not comment on these kinds of posts but I am compelled based on the other reactions. OP, life is busy, chaotic, fun, and crazy at times. Usually not all at the same time. Life comes at you in seasons. Sometimes you will struggle to keep afloat and feel like you are drowning in busy. Others will be calm and you will feel like you are just passing through, perfectly at peace.

The suggestions here that say that you should optimize and focus on how you spend your time are good. Self analysis is a good quality that so few people have today and it will serve you well in any career that you choose. Its also rare enough that if you are good at it you will shine at work.

Dont listen to the folks that tell you to blame the others or the world for wronging you. Your life isn't the worlds fault and if you point fingers at everyone else you will never grow and change yourself. Your parents told you that you can do anything but the saying isnt complete. The full saying should be, "you can do anything you put your mind to." And its true.

I am an American and i would classify myself as a "middle class" one at that. Everyone says that we are wrong in the way we think about life but I do not believe this is true. Right now I have a full time job, a family, and just recently moved into a house. I have climbed the corporate ladder and taught myself a great many things over the years. I constantly strive to learn. I have taught myself to be a programmer, analyst, stock broker, database admin, and even a blacksmith (quite novice but its something i enjoy).

My point in all this speech is to establish my character and tell you a bit about what Ive done with the time i am given. I do these things and work my ass off because I love my family. Working hard enables me to take my family on trips. It lets us do interesting and new things. I love to see my kids experience fun stuff.

I could be content with a small fishing shack next to the lake but I want more for myself and more for my family. The world isnt going to hand you anything on a silver platter. OP you have to go after it, struggle and strive. Keep doing what you are doing. It gets easier.

Dude work is only 40 hours a week. You also have to learn to hang up the coat as you leave the job everyday. Don’t bring it home with you. Then enjoy each morsel of free time. Make time to hang with friends, family and enjoy life. You only live once and you aren’t going to remember that random Tuesday you worked all day.

Try working 60 hrs a week to make ends meet

A job with flexible hours helps. Being able to start work earlier in the day helps the evenings feel longer and you are able to get more things done before 5 when other businesses close. Working form home occasionally is nice as I can do a little housework in between the breaks from my screen.

It's still really hard to find time to see parents, in-laws, or other friends however. I find that the people I see most often or the events I go to are usually closer in proximity to my home.

Nothing sucks the motivation from me more than coming home from work and knowing that to see anyone else, I'd have to drive 45 minutes to an hour away to see them because of distance and traffic. Then knowing that after we've hung out, I still have to drive home to be ready to work early the next morning, especially if drinking is involved as I get super tired after a beer or two if all we are doing is talking.

I'm trying to get better at that though by multi-tasking where I can and making driving more enjoyable with audio-books.

Ha I work between 60 and 80 hours a week And my social life is pretty much spending time with my coworkers on the weekends for maybe a few hours on Saturday and sleeping all of Sunday to prep for Monday

As for dating it's practically nonexistent

I will usually have a date once every 3-6 months sometimes longer

I work anywhere from 40 to 75ish hours a week, depending on available OT.

It's all about prioritization. Get in a routine, determine what's most important(a clean home should be near the top) and get things done accordingly from there. If you find you dont have the drive to 'gogogo', then simply maintain during the week. It makes a worry free weekend all that much more enjoyable.

The problem is that you're still at school and working as you mentioned - a minimum wage job. Not trying to be mean about this at all, I did this twice in my life (I have 2 degrees), but the point of mentioning it is that when you finish college, all the time you spend at college now will be free time that you can use how you want. You still work but only work, not work and college...

Also you'd be expecting that after college you will move up significantly from a minimum wage and start making money. When you do, you can do more because you can spend more money on convenience and therefore use that time more effectively. You can also do better/more shit because you can afford it.

I feel really old when I want to say that you're expecting yourself to already be living the life that you are still working on building. It coming, but you're currently doing the fucking hard part at the moment. The fact is that you have it all sorted, you're working on getting somewhere, so keep up the good work and stop expecting yourself to be at the finish line when you're still running down the track.

For me...

  1. I’ve intentionally worked my career so I have a lot of variety. Work isn’t something I ā€œhave to doā€... it IS work, but it’s an interesting part of my day that I usually enjoy.
  2. I enjoy listening to podcasts, and I get to listen to them while I’m doing something else so it makes driving and chores less of wasted time, and makes them feel like a more enjoyable activity. In fact right now I’m driving less than I usually do so I’m LOOKING for more housework to get done so that I can listen to my podcasts.
  3. There’s lots of ways to work smarter rather than harder. For us at least a Roomba has pretty much eliminated the need for sweeping or vacuuming, which is awesome. For other chores, you can be more time efficient by letting them build up a little bit (like the dishes) and then doing them all at once, rather than doing them every single day when there’s only a few. Same with laundry.
  4. I’m not the type to work out but I do try to make sure I get enough cardio in. Unfortunately I realized I wasn’t doing as much as I should be. Normally this would mean going for lengthy walks which are enjoyable but also knock out a lot of time. So I bought a push mower (no engine or electricity) because it requires just a little more work, and I set up a treadmill so that if I want to walk but I also want to watch tv, I can easily do both at the same time.

It’s true that you only have so many hours in the day and you only have so much energy, and everybody’s jobs and ideal situations are different. But you have to analyze what you want and what you have to work with, and be smart about how you go about it. Find ways to be more efficient or to save time.

You'll never have the same amount of time you had while you were a teenager. This is just how the cookie crumbles.That being said, I also did my bachelor degree while managing a full time job. It's rough. While you are doing both you will have very little if no time. Those are two very big commitments. Still, it can be better.

The thing I learned is that you can always optimize but it requires that you be mindful of how you spend you time. Also, and this is the most important, don't do it alone. Find friends and try and see if you can all, as a team, find ways to help each other. Some people are just better more efficient at some things.

Things I do:

  1. Be efficient with the time you do study. Turn off your phone, put some website blocker and fully commit to studying.
  2. When you pick curses for each semester, look at what each course requires (homework, tests, papaers, etc..) and plan around it. Don't take a lot of very demanding courses at once.
  3. I also switched to using public transit to get to work and did some school work on the bus. It takes longer to get to work but instead of wasted 60 minutes each day I have 90 minutes of studying which I would have had to do anyway.
  4. I can't recommend r/MealPrepSunday enough. It saves a lot of time and money.
  5. I used to cook for a friend and he did my laundry. Cooking for 2 takes almost the same amount of time as cooking for one. Laundry doesn't scale as well because of folding but you can just use multiple machines in the laundromat so it's still less time than laundry+cooking for 1.
  6. Don't aim for a perfect score in every class, pick your battles.
  7. Order groceries online. For me the difference is about 8$ a week for the delivery but you can split it with a neighbor if you order together.
  8. Plan! Put the exact time you are dedicating to each task in a calendar. It will help you see where you should try and optimize the most.
  9. Kill two birds with one stone. Meet up with friends to study, cook, laundry, shopping and maybe watch GoT afterwards.

Hope that helps

Edit: Some grammar errors. Probably not the last of them. :)

I don't study or go to school. I used to, but don't any more.

Immediately post university my work day (from getting up in the morning to being able to sit in my boxers watching TV, for example) was 10 hours. 8hrs in the office and an hrs either side getting dressed, food, and walking to work). That leaves 6 hours a night with 8 hours sleep for hobbies. I spent maybe 30 minutes a night cooking, if that. I'd cook for 4, then eat the same thing for 4 nights running.

Studying is a full time job. You are doing two jobs. That's why you have no time. Also 2hrs either side of work adds up real quick. If you're minimum wage just for the money, find something closer, like round the corner.

Well, you’re in school so that’s a ton of hours you’re tied up. Do you value sleep? I only get about 4-5 hours a night. That gives me another couple hours a day to work with.

Yeah, I have the same issue. My wife works upwards of 50 hours and myself 60 hours a week. Our schedules are complete opposites as well. Oh, and we have a 6 month old son. I started my dream job in recent months while she’s considering going back to school within the next year. We hardly get any time to spend together or with our son. It makes it very difficult.

I get up around 7am and start work at 9:30am, I work in a city, but live further out, I have about an hour and half commute so have about an hour to get ready then leave for work. I finish work around 5:30 and get home around 7pm. That give's me around 4 hours-ish in the evening which I think is plenty of time? I do dishes every evening, laundry every other day, groceries once every two weeks and myself and husband try to do meal plans where we freeze extra we cook to defrost later in the week etc. The weekends we do a good blitz clean which takes about 2 - 3 hours max and the rest of the time is ours to do whatever. Some evening I just wanted to veg in front of the TV, some I will play games, some I will try and be more social, go out, see people and i have like to do a bit of arts & crafts type stuff now and then. Its sounds more like you have no time because you are juggling college and a full-time job. Things will get easier if you only have the one to worry about.

Yeah, then add kids to the mix and say goodbye to those weekend hours. Also you’re never ever allowed to take off work for stress relief without lying about it. Employers demand you sacrifice your home life for them in many fields. Or you can try and balance things and watch the people willing to cut out family time get those promotions. I’m being negative from experience as an older millennial (1981). I never saw my dad because he was always working. My mother drove herself crazy trying to also balance work with 4 kids. I’m a single father with a full time job and a major caffeine addiction. I have no time that isn’t work, school, child or sleep related. Unpopular opinion: you can make your children’s hobbies your hobbies and devolve into that persona.

TLDR: it fucking sucks

I live with roommates and we share household chores and cooking and grocery shopping, and holy wow has it helped cut down on what I need to do on weekends! I also have set up my wardrobe where I don’t have to plan outfits as long as I used to, now I can be dressed in 5 mins and follow a step-by-step routine to be completely ready in 40. Also, I definitely have to give myself a break on what constitutes ā€œcleanā€ sometimes so I can fit in fun— I currently have a pile on my floor that I chose to ignore this week so I could mountain bike.

It’s not bad as long as you don’t have kids. And if you don’t have pets you’ll have even more time. It’s also a bonus if you live closer to your job.

I work full time 9-7 M-F. 30 min commute and it takes me about 45 mins to get ready in the morning. Time saving strategies on chores will give you more free time, but they usually cost money, so you have to decide if the time is worth it to you, especially if you hate the chore. Housekeeper and gardener will relive you from at least 2-3 hours of cleaning. Dropping your laundry at the fluff n fold or dry cleaner will save you at least an hour (you’ll still have to put it away). Ordering your groceries online and either picking them up or having them delivered will save you at least another hour. Taking the car to the car wash might save you labor but you still have to wait for it to get done. As someone who does 100% of the domestic duties in my household, the above mentioned tasks are 90% of my ā€˜not fun’ chores on the weekend. I could free up an hour of my weeks nights if I hired a dog walker, but I know the walk is good for me too!

On weeknights I do the dishes, walk the dogs, make dinner, water my plants and spend an hour or so watching TV and then go to bed around 10:30. I wake around 7, feed the dogs have my coffee while surfing social media. I get ready and get to work by 9, get off work around 7. On the weekends I do laundry, clean the house, tidy the garden, wash the car and pick up the groceries I order online. I actually enjoy my housework so it’s a plus. I have all but maybe 5 hours on the weekend to do whatever I want. I find plenty of time to go shopping for pleasure, have lunch with a friend, take in a movie or nap.

I’ve found adulthood to be immensely more enjoyable than my school years. It helps that I like my job and I make a really good salary. After work all my time is mine. Unlike school, there’s no homework. It’s all just ā€˜living’. I’m either taking care of me or my possessions.

Are you too busy, or is it that you just don't feel like it when you do have time?

There's 168 hours in a week. If you work 40 of those, and even if you miraculously get 8 hours of sleep every single night, you still have 72 hours to do whatever you want with.

It's up to you what you do with those 72 hours.

You just have to learn how to organize yourself tbh, of course with school and a full time job that’s a different story but with just a 4 hr work week job you can get a lot done as long as you schedule yourself, want to work out? Wake up early or go to the gym after work. Hanging out with friends? Make sure that on the other days you take care of your other responsibilities (cooking, shopping etc) that way you won’t feel like you’re using up your time to hang with people. It all also depends how much sleep so you want to get, I tend to go to bed around 11 and wake up at 7, get home at 7 after the gym and have 4 hours free, if I meal-prepped I don’t have to worry about food and cleaning doesn’t take that long. Personally I like to alternate my evenings with things I enjoy doing (playing games, drawing etc)

If you plan on having children, you really will never have free time once they come. I have two kids and at one point I was working, a student and a parent. It was so grueling. My advice would be just like married couples have ā€œdate nightā€, have ā€œdate nightā€ with yourself. Make a commitment that for 3-4 hours once a week at least you dedicate to yourself and use that time to either relax or spend with friends/family. Self-care is incredibly important.

I think you need to take a few hours right now and make a plan. Streamline your week. Develop a routine that has more time management.

Do your grocery shopping for the week all at once (meal prep also). Clean up after yourself immediately. Hell even plan out your clothes you're going to wear and when you're doing laundry.

It's effort cutting time this way at first, but one it's routine it will feel natural. Don't think the way you were taught growing up is the only way. Be receptive to changes.

One thing that really helped me is living below my means and prioritizing. Fuck your latest and greatest iPhone. That's like 8 days of work I can take off.

I feel like there are one million other things I can say. I was in a job that dictated my life and it was awful. PLEASE don't let yourself fall prey to that lifestyle.

You wait for the weekend, or you plan ahead with friends for a night a week or so out so you can make the time. This is one of my big sticking points when jobs want me to work until all hours of the night- NO. You get so many of my life hours during the 8 hours each day I agreed to be there, I’m not going to stay late for appearances or come home to keep working and eat into time with my friends and family even more. Call it entitled millennialism, but at the end, my life will not be measured by the amount of hours I spent at work.

Basically, it’s ok to set boundaries at your job because your outside of work life matters!

Long story short you gotta have the right mix of organization, discipline and drive. I'll explain below:

I set my alarm for 5:30am and try to GTFO of bed asap. In at work by 6:30am and out of work by 3:30pm and back in bed by 10:30pm. So after work I'm left with 7 hours to do whatever. I devote 1 hour to making/eating food, 1.5 hours to exercise, and 1-2 hours to Netflix/YouTube. That means I'm left with 2-3 hours to do whatever else I want. If I'm too exhausted to do something productive I'll drink coffee or take a caffeine pill because I hate just sitting around doing nothing unless it's the weekend lol.

It helps to set goals or something to look forward to, like a vacation you've planned in 2 months or a poker game with your friends the following weekend to stay motivated.

A couple of things change as you get older.

  1. You get good at things. The things that took you an hour, take 20 mins. You have tips and tricks in your back pocket, from what recipe to pull out on a busy evening, to what to wear to impress your boss. Half the stuff you can do on autopilot, which gives you time back. You multitask - watch game of thrones while folding laundry, listening to audiobooks while you ride the bike.
  2. Your priorities change. You'd rather hang with your family than watch TV, not get mad that you can't do both. You say no to your buddies so you can engage more deeply with your hobby, and couldn't be happier about it.
  3. You find the time. It sounds cliche, but if you really want to see that band play, you rearrange things to make it happen. You just need a night to chill with a good friend, you'll find away.

It gets better. It really does.

I studied 40 hours a week for the last 3 years without even a job on the side and I quit when at the verge of a burnout... So no clue

We don’t....

I don’t. I work at least 40 hours a week and have 2 hours of travel time a day. I have maybe 2 hours of free time every night. It’s fucked.

I commute an hour to and from work every weekday, 7-4, so that means getting up at 5 to be gone by 6. I get home around 5, and I'm generally in bed by 8-830. In those 3 or so hours, I, or my wife, cook, clean, and get ready for the next day. I literally feel like I have no chill time and I'm constantly going. Even the weekends feel rushed now with laundry, cleaning, and shopping for groceries for the week. We've tried making meals that last several days during the work week, holding off on laundry until the weekend. Nothing has seemed to 'free up time'.

I think this is just the norm. With the way our society has been structured, we work to live, and live to work. Unless you're in a field that doesn't demand you be present 5+ days a week, it's hard to find that balance of work home life.

If anyone has any suggestions I'd be open to hearing them.

I think that's where #adultingishard came from - it's not easy, it's all a facade.

For me I really try to be as efficient as possible with my time and travel. I HATE running errands on weekends, it always eats up way more time than you think it will. So I try to do it all during the week.

For example, on Fridays I will do all my weekend errands on the way home from work, get gas, go grocery shopping for the next week and weekend, etc. I’ll do the same on the way home from work during the week if i need to. Plan ahead with your time. Try to plan your errands so they’re all in the same area and your route is efficient.

I also meal prep for the week. I make all my work lunches for each week on Saturday or Sunday, usually in the crock pot because it’s less effort but still tastes good. I also make my breakfasts for the week and eat them at work. Planning ahead is key with all this. Make lists, plan your errand routes, plan your fun stuff too so you’re minimizing time wasted.

Time for an uprising I guess

OP I feel you.

This week I've been working from 5 to 10 in the morning, taking a break from 10 to 4, and then working from 4 to 10 at night. I basically sleep 4 hours twice a day and any time I'm not at work or sleeping I'm driving.

Are you happy? Would you be happy with more free time? Do you want to wait to be happy in the long run or are you able to stop something and be happy and self sufficient now?

Two doubles on the weekend. 5 days off.

It get even better when you have kids

Honestly, you just have to rethink what a younger you defined as "a life". When you work full-time and support yourself completely, your weekdays really don't belong to you, you just rent a couple free hours a night. You need to spend however much time it takes every day to manage all your responsibilities so they're minimized at the end of the week.

Once Friday night and the weekend roll around, that's when you and your friends will have more time, though you'll likely still have some responsibilities to bend your schedule around, and there's a strong chance that your schedules just won't line up for some time. And that's fine, you're all likely in the same boat and understand the issue.

But in the meantime, you can always keep in touch over Skype or Discord or something, an email circle, texting, whatever your platform of choice is, there are a lot of them. And you can still make a few hours a night to relax on your own, or with anyone who lives with you (obviously, living with your SO helps a lot in this regard). Everyone's lives are different, maybe you can work something specific out, maybe you stay up a little later than others.

tl;dr - "Having a life" when you and your friends work full-time means doing all the things you're expected to do over the course of each week and learning to fit your social life into the pockets between. At least you're not in Japan.

The US has the highest working hours in the world..but we did used to have 16hour workdays up until the turn of last century.

Unfortunately to live in a society comfortably, there are rules. Everything is based on money. If you have none, well...you're fucked. It sucks but thats the world we live in.

It sucks, I know. We’ve inherited this system from our parents and we’ve been programmed to believing in the 40 hour work week (it always ends up being more) and to structure our lives like the rest of the sheep. No one ever told me this until I told me this: you do not have to do it this way. You are the only person who must answer for how you spent your life. Remember that you’re not guaranteed tomorrow, much less a retirement, and start making moves towards the life that you feel is best for you and yours. Don’t break a bunch of laws and pay your taxes and you should be good.

I worked full time and was in school full time. Honestly you get so used to the go-go-go of it all when you graduate and you no longer have school, you realize that full time job doesn't take up nearly as much time. Granted I'm not sure how long the average commute to work is for your area but if you take that time management you learned juggling work and school, you can definitely find time for friends and hobbies.

Weekends and vacation days. Most of the time you'll have a some time after each day, but most people don't want to do anything after working all day. The best part is you get to do it for the next 40-60 years of your life. So. Much. Fucking. Fun!

Most of my university days, I worked 2 minimum wage jobs while earning 2 degrees. My last semester was hell, and I had more than one mental break. I also worked my ass off for 16 weeks straight to earn one night off with my friends.

My boyfriend this past semester was also working 2 jobs while finishing up school. He kept apologizing for not having much time for me. I told him, if anyone gets it, it’s me. Finish strong, I’ll support you from the sidelines.

It sucks, but being a full time student and working anywhere north of 20 hours a week, and that’s just how life is. I had to arrange plans with my friends months ahead of time. It sucks, but you’ll get through. Being a full time student is a full time job, so going to school and working at the same time is a heavy load.

Don’t beat yourself up. You’re getting through just fine.

welcome to the real world.

If you think you have it rough now wait until you have kids. I have been on a six tens schedule at work for the last year and have kids. I haven't got a night out or to clean my house in months, let alone take a weekend to go home and visit my friends.

that's why the apocalypse is coming soon

My old employer used to always say "We take our vacations 4hrs at a time". I wound up buying his business and understand that more and more each year.

Full time student and worker here!

I don’t have time, usually. But I make time. I wake up at 6:00, go to work until usually 4:00-6:00 depending on the day, 45+ hours a week generally. I come home, hang out with my wife and my daughter for a little while, do my school work, put my daughter to bed and spend the rest of the night with my wife, friends, whomever until around midnight when I clock out, then I get to repeat 5 days a week.

I’m tired a lot. Exhausted half the time at work until I can get my hands on a couple cups of coffee. But sometimes you just gotta take the time you would give to yourself for napping, etc, and give it to someone else. I even do my assignments on my breaks at work if I know I’ve got a busy night ahead of me. Whatever it takes.

Good recs here so far - other hacks could include commuting to work on a bike, so you get your cardio in 2-3 days a week, and do weight lifting at a gym near work during lunch breaks, 2-3 days a week.

I also try to grocery shop later at night or as soon as the store opens - less traffic, easy parking, less people in line. And make your list before you go, so you aren't just aimlessly walking through the store thinking about what you want to eat/make. There's also apps now that you can order your groceries and do curbside pick up. If you're a person that eats relatively the same food each week, the app saves orders so you can just go through and add to cart the same things.

Hang out with friends doing regular life things - like, if you like/want to exercise, invite them on a hike over the weekend. You all have to eat, so invite them over for a weekday dinner date, make bulk food with everyone so you all have lunch for the next day too. Or make some friends at school and have study dates with them where you're using a white board to solve problems or understand a concept - it feels like hanging out and being social, but you're being productive too.

Watch TV shows while cooking, doing laundry, while you eat. Listen to podcasts or audiobooks while cleaning the house or during your commute.

i’m taking a break from school this semester and just focusing on work, myself, and my relationship. even then i think it’s been a good 6 months since i’ve hung out with a friend. there’s just always so much to do outside of work. i’m tired

Depends what your hours are. I used to work at a grocery store with different hours. Sometimes 3-midnight, 1 pm-10 etc. didn’t have much time at all besides on days off. Now I’m working 7 AM-5 PM and I have plenty of time to do everything I need/want to.

at school (the two days I have as a ā€œweekendā€ are the two days I go to school)

studying

That's your answer there. A lot of people are either doing school or working full time, not both. Additionally (and this isn't necessarily available to everyone) a big key to free time is a job that completely ends when you walk out the door. I'm lucky that my job involves a lot of client confidentiality such that I am literally not allowed to take my work home with me. Even if that's not specifically the case for you, you should work on shutting out work thoughts if you don't have work tasks to do after hours. That will make evenings actually feel like the free time they are, instead of just rest time in between work hours.

They dont. Specially if its in America

Try running a business... its even worse.

I work 52-60 hours a week. Still trying to figure it out.

School isn’t permanent. So you will be able to party on Friday and Saturday night after it’s over.

It’s certainly the fact that you’re still in school. I recently graduated college and started working a full time job and I am amazed at how much more time I have to myself and to do things I want. I might be at work 40+ hours a week but I always have my evenings after work and weekends. Even though in school I didn’t work full time, only about 30 hours a week and maybe 15ish hours of class a week, because my schedule was super variable, it was hard to plan anything and it felt like I had no space to breathe. Being on a set schedule and being able to plan around that has been great for me. I’m sure once you’re done with your undergrad things will get easier. Good on you for working full time while pursuing you education, that’s extremely admirable.

Sssssshhh heres an adult secret....we live like pigs :)

Don't worry, it calms down when you're not in school. What little life you can fit in around the two will grow nicely to fill the void left when school is out of the picture.

Sounds like hell for me. I'm a programmer in Berlin and I'm working 35h/w with a 20 minutes commute. I can't even imagine living such a stressful life like yours.

Great question, let me know. /s

I work 40-50 hours a week, and commute 3 hours a day making for 12 hour days. I keep my weekends free of work related labour and schedule free time.

Prioritise your off work time. Sneak in chores during the week to free up weekend time. Make a date one evening a week for just kicking back. Get up early on the weekend to get something done.

Don't watch broadcast tv. Watch it online, you can watch on your schedule.

Save money to take real vacations, actually get out of town.

I worked 2 jobs all throughout college, and went straight into 40+ hours a week after school. I also do local theatre, which requires another 20-25 hours of rehearsal time a week before shows. My advice is to find hobbies that you enjoy enough that you make time for them. I play DnD on the weekends, go to movies, jam with friends, go to the gym, etc. Trying to plan in advance is a little difficult, but breaking the monotony at least twice a week is what keeps me sane. Even if it's just a couple of "the boys" hanging out for an hour before going to bed, it's enough. I'm also very aware of how much "me time" I'm getting, as self care is very important. It has also made me very aware of which friends I actually enjoy having - the people who know you have a busy schedule but still try to make time for you are the ones to keep around.

Reminds me of my first semester in college. My college requires first year students to get signed up by staff. The staff member signed me up for one class 6 days a week. Saturday mornings were the worst. I spent $200 a month just driving to school, had a part time job that wasn't paying enough and had to get a full time job on-top of that. I was working 56 hours a week, going to classes 6 days a week. I barely slept and had to drop out so I could get some money saved up before I plan to go back. Never again will I have so many days of school again.

It’s a similar feeling when you work full time and then have a baby. Eventually you learn to let go of a few things, like instead of doing the dishes one night, you watch GoT. You also learn to multi-task when you can, like doing the laundry while playing with your toddler. You put the load in the machine and then have 30 min to do something else. But sometimes it still feels like there’s never enough time. There’s days when I skip a shower because I prioritize sleeping that day. Being an adult sucks sometimes.

I currently am a freshman in college about to finish the year and I'm more busy than I ever was working full time. I noe essentially work 7 days a week and am under so much stress 100% of the time that I can't even have a day of fun without being depressed about the wasted time. I'm pretty sure I'm going to drop out before finishing because the degree won't help me with what I want to do anyways and I don't need the stress and to waste all that money. I'm taking summer off from school to see if I can get things moving forward in a positive way, but (and I haven't told my wife this yet) I probably won't return and if by some miracle I do it'll be 1 class a week until I finish. I'm done wasting my life being stressed out 100% of the time, I need to be me again.

Edit: I would like to clarify the stress comes from having no time to relax ever and the classes are just time consuming not difficult. I've been getting 4.0's and have been on the presidents list every term, I also got invited to join the honor society at my school. All things someone should be proud of and my wife of course is, but I myself just see it as the recognition for killing myself for a degree I don't want or need. I want to learn skills and things for what I want to do and with a bit of motivation I could learn it all online, I just went for the degree to say fuck you to my parents who were abusive as fuck.

I work full time but I'm not in education. I tend to stay up until around 1AM and I start work between 08:00 and 08:30. I use the later portion of my day to do activities like see friends or go out for food or whatever. It leaves you super tired most of the time but to be honest you get used to it. I've found that if I book a day or two off work here and there, it helps dramatically.

Kind of a shitty answer but you honestly just 'find time' imagine having a child and fitting that into your current lifestyle, you'll say now that it's impossible and you couldn't do it but if you had a child you would have no choice but to find the time or make the time.

I think in summary, you'll be tired most of the time but you really can make the time to do whatever you want to it all depends on priority. If sleep is priority over friends then you've made time to sleep and not made time for friends. It's a delicate balance that just comes over time.

That word now feels weird

Getting a job that allows you to work from home and make your own schedule helps. I was a decade into my career before I got one of those though. Makes it so I can work from 6am to 230pm and I don’t have a commute and I can work in my pjs. So I’m all done and free to do whatever after 230 which for me, Is mom. So that’s kids, laundry, cooking etc. having kids adds a whole new level of less me time but I still wouldn’t trade it.

I worked full time. Was in school full time and at that point my newborn son was waking up 5 plus times a night. I still found time to watch TV and play XBOX.

I’m an engineer in a manufacturing plant. I get up every morning at 5:30am, leave for work at 6:30am, get to work at 7am, leave work at 3-4ish (depending on how much shit I have to do), usually get home by 4pm. Leaves between 6 and 7 hours every day for chores, dog walks, and whatever else I wanna do before I go to bed around 10-11ish. Most of the time I don’t have to take my work home because I get everything done while I’m at work. Not having homework or studying to do opens up WAY more time than you think it does.

Gotta put in the effort in order to live life. My father went through hell to put himself through college and eventually start his own business.

Now he can work from anywhere for part-time hours and make six figures very easily. Living the good life.

You got to college to gain an education - you cut out stuff that does not associate with that because you are focused on your studies. I cut out a lot of tv and other stuff and now, I barely watch anything.

Honestly if you can, I'd drop the full time dead end job and just focus on college. After college, you'd drop bullet points 3 & 4 and replace them with however you see fit.

You make time. Believe me. I work full time third shift 12am - 8am. Go to school full time for my RN, play roller derby two- three times a week and get eight hours of sleep a day. I’m also married and own a home.

You prioritize and make time. You have to or your job will crush you. I spent a lot of years having a lot of ā€œfreeā€ time but was miserable.

You don’t ā€œhaveā€ to do these things. School is a choice and so is working. You ā€œgetā€ to do these things because you are capable and want to better yourself. Also, this is all temporary. You will not be in school forever. Your world will open up once it’s over but for now you must sacrifice and change your mindset. You are learning perseverance and resilience.

You can do it and you are already killing it!!!

I’ve been doing this for a while... on top of that, I got married so I’m even busier now. BUT I’ve started to make time for things I want to do.

Taking 2 hours for shower in the morning + makeup? Shower at night, spend a little less time on makeup unless you’re going out. That buys you back some time. Also, you could layout an outfit the night prior too, that’s what I’ve started doing!

Say you get an hour back from that change, now you have an extra hour in the morning to do some homework, which may buy you some time in the evening.

Small changes like that can make a world of a difference. Make time for yourself before you burn yourself out. Millennial burnout is real, you gotta take care of yourself..

48 hours is a really long time. The time you're describing needing to "recharge" IS your free time. How you recharge is what your hobbies and your "life" are. You can hang out with friends, pursue and education (as you are), do something active outside, join some kind of club, or sit on the couch and do nothing. Look at an Arnold Schwarzenegger speech about 24 hours in the day. He explains just how much time that really is.

The way people do it is by neglecting other things like sleep or chores. The way I see it, there’s 3 main points of adulthood: Work, social life, and health/hygiene. It seems like it’s pretty difficult or impossible for most people to balance all three. Usually one of the three will end up being neglected as there are only so many hours in a day.

The way we live in America is pretty fucked up and not good for our health but that’s how it is for the time being.

I finally went to college at 31 and I'm still in now. I have to keep working because I have kids so I feel what your going through. I can honestly say that it does get better. When your out of school, you won't have all the study and homework time eating up what free time you have. Depending on your job, you'll (usually) be able to leave all your 'work' at work. It won't always be this crazy, hang in there. Edit: Also, remember, if you include the hours you spend studying and doing homework, you're "working" way more than 40 hours a week.

Getting ready for work (shower+makeup+outfit+driving there = 6:45-8:00

At work= 8:00 - 16:45

At home after work eating/sleeping/shitting = 17:15- 23:00 choice of watching movie, fitness, simracing, listen to music.

Weekend = Go meet with friends and family or just do whatever the hell i feel like doing.

Doing laundry, cleaning, grocery shopping, getting gas, etc = i dont iron and the washing machine and dryer take 5 min max every 2 days. ( anti wrinkle program on the dryer )

Cleaning =2 hours per week

Grocery shopping almost daily after work i cycle to the supermarket, takes 20 mins max.

And i dont own a car and have a low rent so i can travel the world without making big bucks and have plenty of money for my other hobbies.

Also i have 40 days off, excluding national holidays.

Oh and no stress at work + no facebook, instagram, twitter and all that "look how great and fake" my life is apps.

I live in the netherlands by the way. And if i get fired i get 75% of my workpay the first month, and 70% of my workpay for the next unemployed 18 months or so ( in my case. You build it up every workyear, max is 2 years )

My max taxrate is 33% or so, richest pay 50% ( damn socialist countries ;) )

Hope its readable...

So assuming you get 8 hours of sleep a night(56 hours of your week in total) and you work 40 hours a week. Throwing in 4 hours for commuting and other things caused by work. And you have spent 100 out of your 168 hours of your week. Leaving 68 hours to do with as you please

I live 1 minute from work, 38 hours per week on 80k a year and my work pays for my accommodation and utilities. I wake up at 730am and leave for work at 755am and back by 4pm. Plenty of time for life, I love my job

I work 32 hours exactly to prevent this.

I used to work more than full-time, and it sucked. Definitely not worth the money.

Now I work 32hrs, with some flexibility with what days and what part of the day.

This way I can try to be home when the wife works from home. Or start a little later to have a relaxing morning and have proper breakfast and watch some YouTube.

Less money but more time to enjoy life.

You know I wonder the same thing as well. How do people have time to take care of newborns? Or a new puppy they bought recently?

Most people push themselves too hard in pursuit of a lifestyle they can’t maintain without being constantly busy. It isn’t healthy and shouldn’t be considered normal. You can make yourself physically and/or mentally unwell if you make yourself do too much. Maybe you need to cut back your work hours and think of ways you can get by with less. If it is a choice between that and keeping your hours and maybe risking your wellbeing, you’ll hopefully be able to prioritise a bit better and be happier with a potential decision to live with less. I hope whatever you choose you’re able to find a balance that works for you.

School is the reason you have no free time. When you're in school every free moment is spent either studying or feeling guilty for not studying. When you work full time you do work till say 6pm but after that the time is yours. You will be able to go out after work and hang out with friends and actually have a weekend.

They don’t!

This is why people become alcoholics. They work their lives away. Spend their little free time too tired to do anything else but rest. Once it dawns in them what their life is, and how there is no escape, alcohol and drugs are used to numb the deep emotional and existential pain.

Well, getting your schooling taken care of now will set you up for a more than minimum wage job, and that will help a lot. And it'll be a struggle for a while for sure, but it will be well worth it when you begin your career. Your job will keep you busy, but will likely include vacation time. If it does- take it! Don't be a hero and never take your vacation days. Make memories when you can.

Try to get a job with as short a commute as possible. I commute 2.5 hours a day and it's a lot. It's easier when you live with a bf or gf/ husband or wife. Then they're always there and you don't have to drive to see them.

You have to prioritize and it sucks. I'm really lucky bc even though I drive far to work every day on Fridays the office closes at noon, so I can make hair or dr appointments on Friday afternoons. That helps a lot.

Americans work a lot more than many European countries, and a lot less than others. It could be worse? I wish I had a better answer for you.

I've been doing 50-60 hours a week for the last couple months. I can't remember the last full weekend I've had. All this is since becoming supervisor. Next week, I'll have 72 hours. I'm beat. I barely have time to clean my car even. Really the only reason I have been pulling a lot of overtime is I got promoted to supervisor and have been short 3 people since.

I'll be happy when I have a weekend again, lol. All I wanna do is work on my yard (it's a project).

It's slightly more attractive than being a homeless. Welcome to adulthood...

The vice industry like alcohol and tobacco takes the edge off temporarily...

I just sleep less.

Your both right and wrong about that last bit. You certainly do have more freedom and potential downtime as an adult, no homework etc. but it usually does get busy. Luckily for me my social life and hobbies overlap with each other. I play dnd and video games with friends most of the time.

One thing that makes my life a lot easier, is getting ready for work is quick for me. I'm a single dude with a cat, so I moved to an apartment 5 minutes away from work. I also have no fashion sense, so picking out an outfit is easy too.

Simply having a full-time job leaves you with a lot of free time if that’s your only commitment. However, if you also have studying, children, or other circumstances in your life thy demands a lot of time, then yes, it sometimes feels like you have no free time.

I have a daughter who recently turned one, and for the last year, I feel like most days I have to choose between having some time to myself at night, or getting a decent night of sleep. Doing both feels impossible. But that means even if I do get some time to myself, I’m too tired to truly enjoy it.

I don't go to school, work a 6-3, and don't mind only 4-6 hours of sleep most nights. People tell me it'll get harder as I get older, so I'm trying to enjoy it while I can.

Its either work or worse for us normies out here working away. The fear of not having the lights on or a roof over your head and the guilt of failure keeps you going in most cases. Being afraid of not having cash for food. Its America and all but it's still survival on a weekly basis for me. I have time for activities by neglecting something else it's just the way it is something is going to get left out no matter what. At some point you'll break in a good way and won't care about certain things. I'm 26 and I don't have some perfect answer for you I'm hoping the phrase "do what you love and you'll never work a day in your life" will come true at some point because you will spend most of your life working.

Work-life balance is a myth for most people.

An 8 hour job quickly becomes a 9-10 job if you factor in unpaid lunch, commutes, overtime, getting ready, co-workers wanting to hang out, etc. That 8hrs of sleep can range wildly from sleep deprivatio to gain extra time (which demotivates you), or >8hrs which lessens your free time.

And this doesn't include chores, kids, schooling, shopping, and other out of work obligations. On top of the fact work usually de-motivates you and drains your energy. Making an hour of youtube far more tempting than gallivanting with friends.

Currently, I have maybe 2 hours of free time a day. 2 hours of being grumpy and tired.

I wrote this really long preachy reply trying to convey me life lessons to you, pressed delete because you aint got time for that. Just 3 things.

  1. Boundaries,
  2. few people have their shit together - adults are masters at playing pretend in front of other adults and
  3. Enjoy the moment that you are in, even if its not fun, just be in that moment.

From a frantic-life is-a-race-in-a-hurry-hare-that-missed-out-on-many-moments-because-she-was-trying-hard-to-fit-in-and-keep-up-47 year old female.

I got caught up in that.

It took going to jail, and losing everything I thought was important. I had only old pictures when I got out.

I realized you don't need much to live. It's pretty easy. Do what you want to do. F the rat race. It's a brave new world out there. You can do anything you want with the internet and a 100$ computer.

Idk if I'm allowed to say this...but you can check out my site at my name .com for a little inspiration

You are in the worst spot right now, you are grinding hard, but i promise it'll be worth it once you get through it. A full time job after you graduate will seem like a breeze. Hang in there!

You think anybody with an office job works the whole time they are there? šŸ˜‚

I consider every misrable second in an office as work". Even if it is lunch with coworkers for the billionth time.

My team has a weekly team meeting on our calendars called 'teambuilding'.

It's actually us going to lunch and bullshitting.

Anyway, take up a hobby you can do at work, like writing.

Once you're out of school, you'll have more time so at least this is just a season in your life. When you're older, you just seem to be able to manage your time a bit better so no time is wasted.

Have worked 90+ hour weeks (13 hour days 7 days a week) in the past and still have free time. It's all about how you manage your time and what you prioritize. I work 45+ hours a week right now and have plenty of time to go out daily if I'd like.

I'm lucky. I work for a company owned by my friend and have friends that work here and got into the business. I do decorative concrete. It doesn't sound exciting but it gives me a creative outlet. I also get to travel to a bunch of new places and do work for some exciting people. I recently worked on Jason Kidds house and had an opportunity to chat him up a little. Super cool guy.

If you are concerned at this stage in your life (good), just wait until you've done it all your life and regret much of it. Oh how it would be different the 2nd time around. Pity we don't get a 2nd time around.

All that you do today is driven by your perceived values...what you think is important, so carefully reassess your values and plan. Values will change throughout your lifetime.

This is why I believe in UBI and medicare for all as an outcome from advancement in technology. Ideally we should learn a skill and make money off of contract work on our time.

With UBI and medicare we could have a higher quality of life and focus our energy on things that are more worthwhile. (Science, innovation, curing disease, quality family time, etc...)

For this reason I will only support any candidate running for office that is championing these 2 issues. Whoever the candidate is regardless of party.

On a technical level, humans should be living in a borderline utopia. But humans manage to fuck it up because of our nasty evolutionary habits.

Most human suffering is self-inflicted.

I feel this so much. It honestly sucks. I work 48 hours a week while my fiancƩ works 72 hours one week, then 40 the next and rotates. We rarely ever see each other but bills need to be paid and this is the only way we can financially make it right now.

Once your through with school and can just focus on a job/career, you will have more time. But there will never be enough time in the day to get everything done everyday. Sometimes you can't do the dishes. Sometimes the floor doesn't get swept for weeks. Sometimes you say fuck it and go out anyway (assuming you can afford to). Once you accept that there will always be something else to do, you can take pride in the things you were able to accomplish. But seriously, full time school and work is probably a 100 hour a week investment, once schools over you'll be able to breath again, just keep pushing on!

Time management is key. I work full time (10 hour days, 5 days a week), my wife and I both commute 60 mins each way, I’m going to school for my Masters, 2 younger kids, house etc. Wife works a similar type schedule but she does 12 hour days, 4 days (some weeks it’s 5 days). You just have to manage your time and get into a rhythm and stick to it. Once you get it down you’ll find that you have more extra time. When your schedule is hectic and all over the place it causes you to lose time because you are constantly reacting to different things. Your day needs to be predictable so you can better plan. Understand that wrenches will get thrown into your plan and cause issues with your rhythm, but you need to be able to prioritize them. Look up the ā€œtime management matrixā€ or Eisenhower’s Urgent-Important principle. It breaks things down into quadrants... important, not important, urgent, not urgent. You can assign your tasks into these areas so you know what to knock out first and what can wait. This will allow you to prioritize your time and get into a rhythm ultimately giving you are more free time.

[deleted]

Yes we have child care. I drop one child off at school at 715 am and then head to work. He goes until 245 pm. The other child is in pre-school from 11 am to 1 pm.

It really isn't that complicated. I work 40 hours a week and have mountains of free time to pursue hobbies and spend time with my boyfriend and hang out with friends. I do whatever chores I need to do right after work and then have the rest of the night to do whatever I feel like. That's 4-6 hours every night. I also make sure to do a lot of chores throughout the week so my weekends are always wide open. Right now you may feel overwhelmed and like life is to busy for anything, but that's only because you're in school. Once you're done with school you won't have to spend time studying and doing homework. You can use that time to relax instead.

Medieval peasants had more downtime than modern workers. Except during planting and harvest seasons, and a few days of mandatory labor a year ( a week or two ) on behalf of their noble, peasants by and large had a lot of free time. Winter was a fallow period.

It's called living for the weekend.

The biggest thing I’ve noticed is it’s all perception and time management. I was married and had one kid when I started college. My second was born during finals of my first semester. I started working part time shortly after that while still going to school full time. I then moved to full time work and felt like I was drowning so I cut back to part time school. After awhile I felt like I could handle both at full time again. I had a third kid and was working full time and going to college full time for an engineering degree. Eventually I felt like I wasn’t drowning and things started to feel normal. I graduated college in 2017 and I’m just working full time. I feel like I have so much free time now that I don’t know how to fill it.

We have a lot of time in the day but things like phones, games, tv, and other distractions really eat into that time. Time management was one of the most valuable skills I learned in college. I also had a supervisor that I hated while I was in the Navy. He would always ask ā€œwhat are you working on?ā€ and you always had to be working on something. It could be anything work related or self improvement but you were never allowed to sit and do nothing. I hated it at the time but after about a year of him, I started to see what he was doing. I’m now very thankful for him instilling that into me because even 10+ years later I still ask myself ā€œwhat am I working on?ā€ I allow myself to have some downtime but I constantly feel guilty if I’m not working towards something that either needs to be done or something to improve myself.

You smoke a lot of weed... that’s how you live... don’t over do it though cause it can be inhibiting.

When you’re done with school and if you can get a job with traditional hours your evenings will free up and you’ll have weekends. We have a toddler so we typically don’t do traditional going out but we go camping on the weekends a lot during the summer. Our weeknight evenings typically are just family dinner and chilling at home. And we alternate hobbies (I play rec league sports on Friday nights, husband mountain bikes a couple times a week after work). And when we’re home on the weekend we will choose one family fun day and the other to get stuff done.

It's really not that bad. I work from 6am to 2:30pm and honestly I come home shower play video games make dinner watch TV with my fiance. It's a simple life and I don't mind it.

I personally start work at 5am and get done a 2:30. I usually go to bed around 9ish so i have a solid couple hours to do stuff. I know its not necessarily applicable depending on your career choice, but finding a non 9-5 work schedule really opens up your time.

It's all about time management and prioritizing what you dedicate your time to. I work over 40 hours per week but still have time to do other things. I usually go to bed around midnight and wake up at around 7 or 8 am. That leaves a lot of free time during the week and the weekends. I work from home, so that is one advantage I have. If I had to spend an hour or two per day in the car commuting I'd be a lot more stressed. I used to do that and hated losing that time each week sitting in traffic.

Well, for me, I work three twelves with four days off.. plenty of time for nearly anything I'd want to do...

26, California, here. No kids. Work Sun-Thur, 10pm -5am. $17hr. School is Mon-Thur, 3pm -9pm. My free days are Fridays and Saturdays.

Most people in America work mornings I believe. They wake up at 7am, work from 8am-5pm & get home at 6pm. That's the majority of your day, gone. You get home and try to relax for a few hours, before you go to bed for those 8 mythical hours of sleep. I think the average is like 6.5, with many getting much less than that.

If you have school and work, factor in studying and homework, which takes up more hours. If you add kids into your work or school life, more hours of getting kids up, get them ready, make breakfast, send them to daycare, public school or homeschool.

And that's just the mornings. Some people work afternoons, evenings, late nights or graveyards. These hours can make it even harder to do anything.

You wake up and do it all over again. You get a day or two off for "Me" time. Some people just relax on the weekend before going back to work/school on Monday. Some people rarely get to relax.

Then you realize you have to work until you're 65, then you get to retire and live your life. This is life.

Life now seems so time consuming when you look at it like this. Time management is the key.

I am 24 years deep into my career, I am 39, I have an 18 year old daughter and I work a lot, a lot lot. My late wife and I after our daughter was born thought the same thing, I would never have time to do anything. She was unable to work due to medical problems. I work 13 or more hour days for a long time. Throughout the course of the year we get slow down times where it's only 10 hours a day, but I always managed and made time for my family. If it meant I had to stay up a couple hours later and lose sleep just to enjoy my wife and daughters time I would sacrifice my sleep so I could enjoy the family time I wanted and my family deserved. You're never too busy to do anything unless you don't want to do said thing. Since my wife passed away I have thoroughly thought about things how it was then and I am happy and proud that I was able to provide for my family not just money, home, food but also what they deserved their time with father and my wife having time with her husband.

You learn the true value of your time and eventually you start to get used to the routine. At first I woke up with just enough time to rush out the door for work. When I got home I would sit around until bedtime. As the years have gone on I started waking up with a few hours to spare before work. Thats my lounging time. When I get home thats when Ill tidy up, do laundry, etc. Another huge time saver is getting your grocery shopping routine down. Make lists and plan meals. If dome right you can cook an entire weeks worth of meals in one couple hour long swoop. Having a grocery lost and meals plamned reduces your time spent in the store drastically. I buy a weeks worth of groceries.

Schedule doctor/dentist appointments before or after work. Get those out of the way. Get a gym membership thats within 15 minutes of you or is on the way to/from work. Limit your time spent on social media on the days you need to work and pay attention to the things that you need to do. Get a whiteboard and set it up somewhere in your kitchen, bedroom, or by your front door. Write down all of the things you want accomplished by the end of the week.

But most of all plan ahead and make lists. Organization saves you a lot of time, and time is probably the most valuable thing you will have.

Streamline the necessities and stay on task during your work week. When my time off work comes around Im free to do whatever I want to. Needing to be so busy for most of my waking days sucks, but those 1-2 days off make up for it as theyre completely my own.

Not that difficult for me. I work 8-5 M-F. Get holidays off plus 20-25 days of PTO.

Wake up at 6:30AM, eat, read, work on projects (run every few days). Work 8-5 Get home by 5:15 and go to sleep around 11pm. This give me 6 hours to do whatever I want. Plus all weekends.

Just have to prioritize your time. Save time cleaning by doing small stuff everyday. Cook your meals once a week to save time. Work out in morning to save time after work, etc.

When school is off your plate you get a TON more free time. It’s falling into the habit of doing nothing when you get home which then turns into you ā€œhaving no timeā€ during the week. I work 9-5 Mon-Fri and have more time than I know what to do with.

The type of job you have can help alleviate this, I'm a 9-5 office drone 5 days a week and some days aren't bad but others really suck not because something bad happens but just cause the day drags on, I'm lucky I have awesome co-workers and no cares if we swear, joke and get loud all day so long as we get our work done and keep it down on calls. It really just comes with finding out what works best, majority of the time my wife and I end up going to visit a random family member on whim, but most days we come home and get some chores done and relax and hangout with our dogs. She is pregnant so soon we'll be dealing more with a newborn. You've just got to find what works best for you, I know it's odd because it offers no real explanation but once you start getting older things start to go smoother with free time.

I am a pilot with a wife,2 dogs, and a cat. My hobbies include running ultramarathons playing šŸ“ and building plastic models. The way I see it, is I just do things I enjoy and life just works out. Idk what to tell ya buddy.

40 hours a week is not that bad, humans for most of history had to work significantly harder for more hours just to survive.

It’s pretty easy if you only work 8-5 M-F, get paid well and have zero kids or SO’s lol.....i just do hobbies and social activities on nights and weekends lol

It’s super hard for you bc you go to school and work min wage.

Get that degree, make real money and never ever have a romantic relationship or hildren and you’ll be good lol

There are 24 hours in a day. Assuming you sleep for 8 of them, work for 8 more, and spend 2 hours traveling to/from work and also preparing for work (shit, shower, shave) that leaves you with 6 hours each day. Depending on how your jobs schedule looks (I e. What time you get home) this is plenty of time to have a hobby, spend an hour or two with a friend, etc.

I know this cause I worked 45 hours a week as a senior manager while also going to college full time. I had a regular study schedule and got most of my studying done at school, between classes and on the bus to and from school. I spent 4-8 hours per week studying. I graduated with good grades, spent plenty of time with friends, working on my own hobbies, all while working 45 hours a week. The problem is time management, not America's work ethic.

The less time we have. The less time we can think about things. When people have more time they tend to rock to boat disrupting the status quo.

Fully clean house once a week. Do laundry 2-3 times a week. Get gas on the way to work.

Most days you have about 5+/- hours free time. On days off you have extra. Plenty of time to work on w/e

It takes all weekend for my body to recover from the work day. It's awful. We should have 4 day work weeks at 6 hours a day

Your title is wrong. It's full time job + being a student.

Well you have to realize that you actually have 1,5 jobs. You are going to work ~38 hours per week and going to school/studying 14 hours per week. You can attribute some of your time spent there.

Otherwise your time management it’s trash. 2 hours to get up and to work in the morning? That is enough time to do dishes or laundry, so some cleaning, make breakfast, go for a run or to the gym, shower and get to work on time. Try being more motivated to get stuff done quickly and right away. Also learn to be efficient. Stop for groceries or run errands on the drive home from work. Study on your lunch break at work or in between classes on the weekend. Put laundry in the washer before you go to sleep and in the dryer as soon as you wake up. Don’t turn on the tv or phone until you have accomplished X chores.

Being an adult isn’t suppose to be all work but it’s work first.

It’s possible.

I work about 60hrs a week Grad school Volunteer 1x month Do a lot of outdoor stuff hiking, biking Not much of a social life though but that’s by design. Either way I would replace X social event with the time slot of another activity or weekend travel. I watch little to no tv No social media other than Reddit which I check intermittently throughout the day. It is a tight schedule but possible.

I do wake up at 5 though. You basically break every part of your day in blocks. Where can you be more efficient? Like sometimes I do homework in morning because my brain is most awake and plow through more than after work when I’m tired and brain dead.

You got two weeks in a year where you can live. It's called vacation. note: some places only allow you 1 week. Other's more.

I work 11-12 hrs a day plus my hour drive to get to work, so about 13-14 hours for work a day. I literally wake up get ready go to work come home sleep. It's a routine that sucks but I do it so I can have the things I want, I just cherish my days off

I'm thankful that I have a job otherwise I would kill myself, intentionally or accidentally (with drugs). I don't know what to do at the free time, I'm already muscular and go to the gym. Although I live in a shithole (make $15K/year) and have no friends or SO so that might contribute to my boredom.

it’s like you only have 48 hours each week (Saturday and Sunday) to actually do what you want

Just wait until you realize people work on weekends too. For me the "trick" was sacrificing sleep. Added bonus, have a child! Then you'll have even less of a social life and get less sleep while inevitably hating the person you loved enough to do this to yourself in the first place! And just to clarify I'm currently single, and have enough money to do whatever the fuck I want whenever I want and its glorious. My advice is just based on the ruined lives of my close homies.

Welcome to the desert of the real.

Remember when we were kids/younger and our parents kept saying: "Don't complain, this is the finest moment of your life". Crazy that they were right huh?

Now trying adding "Taking care of an infant" on that list and it will go up a scale of no-life.

Yes. You gotta set strict limits with work - that you'll be there for the time you're paid, can extend that in emergencies or very rare special circumstances.

Then you gotta carve some time out of that for yourself and a balancing act wi the people in your life

I totally get this. I work full time and am in college full time online. I also spend quite a bit of time volunteering at my church. When I consider everything I need to fit into a single week, it’s natural to feel completely overwhelmed.

The thing I began doing was tracking my time by meticulously writing down everything. I began thinking of my time the same way I think about my money. If I don’t keep track, it will all disappear and I won’t have any idea where it went.

When time is short, you need to budget it and make the most of where you find extra minutes. If you feel overwhelmed, you probably need to budget in some time to relax after making sure our responsibilities are met.

Chances are you have more time than you think you do and you may even be surprised how long you spend doing things that don’t really require a lot of time.

Just like a budget, you only have so much time to go around and will have to prioritize that. But the good news is that even if it’s tough right now, you won’t always be in school. It’s temporary. Think of all you will be able to accomplish once you graduate! Chin up. It is hard right now but it is not wasted time and you will get a return on this important investment!

I just started going to school again too, only 3 classes but school takes up SOO much time. Before when I was just working it felt like I had alot of time, luckily i get out of work at 3:30pm but no with school i feel like I have to pick, do my assignments or hang with friends. Just give your self one day to just chill even if that day is really only a half day. It makes me wonder how people with kids have time to actually be a parent(cause most people def do not get out at 330pm) Once youre done with school you will have time for yourself just make sure you leave work at work once you clock out.

How I manage my time:

  • Automate what you can.
  • All of my bills except my credit card are on auto-pay. That's mortgage, student loans, car, internet, utilities, etc. I have a pretty good idea what they're going to be, so I just verify the balance in my checking account weekly. This may not work well if you live really paycheck to paycheck.
  • Make your routine tasks more efficient; eliminate waste.
  • Every morning, I feed the cats, make an espresso, black tea, cereal, protein shake, get dressed, chat with my wife and out the door in 45 minutes or less. It's a system. Alarm goes off > go downstairs > hit the switch on the kettle and turn on espresso machine > feed cats > use bathroom > grind beans > pour tea, heat espresso cup, clean portafilter without putting down the kettle > make espresso > drink espresso while pouring cereal > pour almond milk into pre-made dry ingredients of protein shake (I make 5 up on Sunday afternoon and keep them in the fridge) > bring tray of breakfast upstairs > iron shirt while drinking shake and chatting with wife > go to work. Once per week I set the delay on the washing machine so it finishes right as I wake up, so I can throw it right in the dryer
  • Start automatic tasks right before you do other stuff, or at night. Start a load of laundry/dishes right as you're heading out to shop, or to bed.
  • Don't fuck around at the grocery store; make a list and stick to it, and try to figure out when your store has the smallest crowds.
  • Find efficient ways of doing even non-route things. My life got way easier when my wife insisted I stop cooking fancy meals 5 nights a week. I make a lot more pot roasts/braises/stews/salads than I used to, and I can usually prepare dinner in 30 minutes or less.
  • More important than anything else, maybe: schedule downtime and make it a priority. Your health and happiness are your number 1 priority (unless you're married or have kids, and even then, still in the top 3).

I work 40-45 hours a week and do 3-4 college courses every semester. And I gotta say, it's hard to have any free time. I just recently went back to college last year and there's times I regret it because I feel like I don't have any free time anymore. However I have a couple pieces of advice which has helped me gain some time back.

This is the main one:: Do not procrastinate on your school work. Hit the ground running each semester. Figure out all the assignments for the classes. Most teachers will happily tell you the full list of what they're going to grade you on. Start working on all of it right away. Get that 4 page paper (that isn't due for another month) done. Do that case study. Work ahead. This will give you free time later on because that homework is done!

Keep an activity log for a week. Sounds stupid but bear with me. Write down EVERYTHING you do, when you do it, and how long it takes to do. And I mean everything. Don't lie to yourself. If you spend 45 minutes each morning scrolling through facebook, write it down. Once you have a full week, identify all the activities you do every single day. Can these be combined/shortened? Such as, can you combine facebook with your morning shit? Can you brush your teeth in the shower? Does your shower need to be 30 minutes, or can you wiggle it down to 15? Smush activities together. Multitask as much as you can and shorten tasks.

Record class lectures or see if there's an audio version of your books. Listen to these anytime you can. Driving to work, working out, if work lets you listen to music, at home making dinner. It'll save you some study time.

I do the above and it's made it so I have time to clean, shop, visit relatives, host D&D sessions with friends, and play video games again. The part of your schedule that's stopping you from having a life is the school part. Unless you fall into a lot of cash, you're probably going to have a 40+ work week till you're old and wrinkly so get used to working. Once class is done, believe me, you'll have time to live again.

Unless you have kids. In that case, kiss free time goodbye.

Maybe look into minimalism? It’s really helped me to figure out what stuff I like having and what stuff was just getting in the way. And the way that looks for me is changing as my life changes. I never spend more than an hour cleaning on any given day, usually more like 20-30 minutes. Also think about just how much time school takes up in your life right now. I’m guessing that’s a lot of time that I’m the future could go to hobbies and family/friends time. I would suggest occasionally putting aside some time you would normally spend on housework or studying and do something for you, whether that’s reading a book, going out with friends, visiting grandma, etc. My schoolwork/life always seemed less overwhelming if I made myself take breaks to recharge now and then.

Luckily for me I work 8 days on at 10 hours a day. 6 days off. So that's 80 hours in 2 weeks, still full-time hours. Find a job like that.

I work a shift pattern (6 days on, 4 days off - with the last two of those 6 usually being night shifts). It means I’m usually working 60 consecutive hours without a day off, but those 4 to rest and recoup really balance it out. It’s hard because I work over weekends a lot, so I don’t get to see my friends or my partner (who works a 9-5) as much as I’d like without having to plan ahead. So I plan ahead. Sometimes 6-12 months for a free weekend that’s synced up with my 9-5 friends. It can be hard and there are sometimes sacrifices, but the job is well paid and it’s worth it for me.

Also, coming into the world of work after finishing my degree, I found it so liberating at the end of my shift when there was no extra work to take home with me - no assignments to research or papers to write - that time was all mine. So I feel as though OP will feel different once college is out of the way.

Start cutting back on some other portions of your routine that don’t matter. 2hrs to get ready for work? Makeup? Cut it down to an hour. Change the routine. I’m in the Navy and regularly work 60+, and for a while we were pulling 100hr+ weeks back to back. I still made time for my three kids, but it takes a cut from somewhere else. To give you an idea here is my average day.
0500- wake up 0700- muster at work 1700- make an effort to complete my day and be home by this time

1730- wife heads off to work 1730- dinner for myself and the kids. Then I get two to three hours with them 2030- bedtime for the kids, baths sometime before 2030-2230 - I clean or do other tasks around the house, garage etc. some days I don’t do anything but just sit down and enjoy the silence. 2300- finally go to sleep and start over again

We cherish the weekends( when I don’t have duty) and do our best to have fun.

We don't. We're all just miserable and exhausted.

I mean I got my bachelors degree online while working full time and managed to get married and have a kid. Also had plenty of time to relax, play video games, go out with friends, see family. I only really sleep like 5-6 hours a night but I’ve never felt like I need more. You just find a way to make time. Now that I’m done school I don’t even know what to do with myself most days!

Don’t be. 28/m here. Been in the workforce for 6 years, in that time I’ve taken on competitive cycling, climbing, lifting, traveling and been to Europe twice, going again this year as well. I rock climb after work, ride my bike, meet up with friends, coffee shops, go to breweries. Life post college has been 100x better than college. I work 40/hrs a week and have more money and freedom than I did back then. You just can’t settle into that post work/relax on the couch routine. That will eat you up and spit out years and wonder where they went. Delete Netflix, drop the video games, get out there, make connections, make more friends. Life is long and beautiful when you are out there pushing yourself. Life flies by when you sit and waste it away.

This reminds me of something I saw on reddit a while back where a company went from 5 to 4 day work weeks and it increased productivity. Many jobs are not best measured by hours, and maybe in the future that will be better reflected in expectations of employers.

I have a B.A.,a full time job, a part time job, three kids, a husband, and absolutely zero time for anything...ever. my pt job pays for my student loans, and my ft job pays for 3/4 of the rest of the bills. I have no friends and no time that doesnt involve work, sleeping (not much), cleaning, and kid related activities. Adulting sucks. I'm 35 years old.

I can totally relate to feeling like you can't breathe, especially when you're going to school and working full-time. As an adult who went BACK to school while working a full-time job, yeah it was rough. Then we (my wife and I) threw even more chaos into he mix and had our daughter. Probably some of the most hectic years of my life, but well worth it.

I'm now done with school (Yee) and work full-time, and it really comes down to prioritizing your own time. Just try and remember, you wont be studying/doing homework and exams for the rest of your life, it's a temporary hurdle in life, you'll get over it.

If you're fortunate you can get a full-time gig that flexes with your desired schedule so you can have more time to spend with grandma and the rest of your fam.

Yeah, school is the killer. Not saying you should quit, but finishing will drastically improve your free time. I'm working full time and decided to go back to school for a Master's degree. I cannot fucking wait until December when I'm finally done.

Everybody’s working for the weekend.

I'm off at 5 and asleep around 10 (I like my sleep, but others stay up later), then count Friday night, all of Saturday and most of Sunday. It's frustrating for sure, but there IS time.

Don’t do laundry and get fuel everyday

Define "time to live". Because I work full time and I get like two "free" hours in the afternoon. This is dedicated to working on side projects like illustrating comics or editing short films. On weekends I usually have a bit more time, but that's when I have to shift focus into using more of that free time for working on said projects.

So really, I'm the reason for why I don't actually have free time. But if I don't spend my free time being productive, I feel really guilty and anxious.

I don’t really have advice because I’m going through the same thing, but I have a small tip that has helped me. Clean as you go. I’ve figured out that I save more time and live a lot cleaner if i do. And what I mean by that is instead of waiting to have a cleaning day or whatever, pick up as you go throughout your week. Cooking food? Vacuum while you wait. Put toilet cleaner in and scrub right after using it in the morning. Decide to change your mind on a outfit? Put it away instead of leaving in on your bed or the floor or ā€œthat chairā€. I also fold my laundry while I’m catching up on a tv show that I’m always behind in and it helps me get through it. Also with cleaning the kitchen, cleaning while you cook also helps in there! I like to chop everything up and put it in the pan and while it cooks, clean the cutting board and knife and put it up. I do that through most steps so my kitchen doesn’t stay a mess afterwards. Doing these things have lifted a lot of weight off my shoulders

Just started a company in January and now have 5 employees to manage. I'm working from 7am to 10:30pm if not later, from monday to friday. I am very happy that I have a reliable employee during the weekend, but if I didn't I'd have to hire someone to clean my house and do my laundry. My SO takes care of the meals but I try ti take at least a 1 to 2h break everyday to decompress. It's my only way of surviving.

When people who work 40h/week job, I get annoyed when they act like they have less free time than myself. It's important to realize though, that some people are able to decompress and distance themselves from their stressful jobs more than others. Listen yo your body and your limitations and your psychological wellbeing will remain intact- doing too much can result in a burnout.

My comment will probably get lost, but I find enjoyment in my day through small things. I see things that are funny or interesting when I'm working and I like to ponder about them. I'm a big daydreamer so at the end of the day it doesn't feel like I have worked too much as my head is full of all these thoughts and ideas.

Wait, pre-med and you thought you would have some sort of life?

Should have been a twitch streamer instead...

I’m almost 31 and my entire life is just work, cleaning my apartment and spending any spare time I have with my boyfriend.

In the last two months ive only had two days off which I had to spend deep cleaning my place and then rushing to get a manicure. I’m about to get my eyebrows waxed before work. Adulting sucks.

Best advice is to have a savings, don’t get yourself into debt and work hard now so you can take time off later.

Also, make sure you have time for yourself.

Once your out of school you'll have more time. But really those 2 days off a week you sometimes get are all you have. And those days are usually spent cleaning, laundry, yard work, etc. Adulting is bullshit

I work full time (often more) and my wife works 20-30 hours a week.

I work retail so we often don't see each other, things like laundry, dishes, vacuum get left for days at a time. Even though we cook at home at often don't have time to eat at home. Life is hard...

(Also in case anyone was going to tell me to get a real job, I have a degree in civil engineering but with the market crash there are thousands of unemployed people with better experience and education than me... I'm lucky to have my job)

It gets a lot better when school stops. 40 hours a week working is super manageable I get 2 week pto a year plus sick leave. With my job I can get time off approved even without PTO I just dont get paid and I plan stuff for weekends and even can go disc golfing after work if my wife will let me be away from the kid that long (she is almost old enough to take discing)

I should he in bed by 10 but 11 to midnight is ok as long as I dont do that all 5 days in a row. Caffine is a life saver. School sucks. It just does. Honestly fuck free college they should pay you to go to school if the economy actually relies on educated people to function. But let's not get too political. Lol

In the same boat, plus 2 small children and training for a half marathon. You get used to it. Little moments throughout the day are your "rest." Other than that, you just get used to constantly moving or working on something. Meal prepping healthy food on the weekend helps. Daily meditation and exercise helps keep you sane even though it takes time.

I spent way more time on school than my full time job. Plus the schedule is (generally) much more steady, which is an underrated aspect. I know which evenings I can fit in my hobbies and which nights are busy. I can plan a vacation months in advance by requesting work off. I can plan something for a weekend that is 5 weeks off and make the most of it because I know I won't have a surprise exam or project. You'll get there.

Just be tired all the time, duh.

Really though my boss works more than I do, and then coaches fitness on the side and has time for his family, extra curricular learning and hobbies.

He claims that he just enjoys learning. I'm convinced he's not human.

You factor in to that children and you don't get time to sleep! I have 2 children and work part-time but I'm either working, taxi-ing the children around, cooking, trying to clean (or at least the bear minimum), tidying up after the children, helping with homework etc, etc. Its not easy juggling things, couple that with a partner who doesn't help that much around the home and it all equals tiredness, irritability and mild depression. So my advice, don't try too hard to please, just do the best you can!

Hey I worked for a little through school, it was really hard until I found ā€œbetter ways to earn moneyā€. There’s a reason several college students strip or do other things that can bring in heavy money in a shorter period of time. Good luck! You’ll be a very experienced in the long run if you keep up this work ethic.

Hi OP! I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling to enjoy your life right now. Working and being in school is absolutely miserable, I hated every second that I had to juggle schoolwork and a regular full time job. Once you get out of school things open up so much: less going back and forth to different places, no studying, no extra worry about homework/tests, more money to work with, etc. It's incredible. Once you get off work you can leave the work at home and you have the entire afternoon to work out, cook good food, explore hobbies/activities and have relax time (not all in one day of course, but examples of some things to do~). Not to mention the weekends! It was incredible once I was out of school to have TWO entire days off in one week, whew lad.

Don't listen to the pessimistic people in this thread. It's all in balance, work/recharge/socialize/sleep, and there's plenty of time for that balance. It doesn't take more than a few hours a week to learn a new talent or explore a hobby or visit family. Cleaning doesn't take long if you take a few minutes every day to clean up instead of letting it build. Spending time with friends can recharge your social battery with as little time as it takes to share a meal together. Not to mention you have sick days, vacation time, and holidays with most full-time jobs after school. Hang in there! It does get better if you put the effort in.

Echoing from my other comment: for anyone reading this that feels like you never have the energy to see people, or lack the motivation to leave your room/house and thinks that I'm crazy that this stuff is possible, please talk to your doctor or see a therapist. So many people suffer from mental health issues that can be treated so you have more motivation and energy, and you deserve to live the best life possible!

I have about 6 hours a day during the week to spend time with my son and pursue hobbies. 2 family dinners every week. You make time if it’s important to you. I socialize with friends but not as much because we all have kids and going out isn’t my priority right now.

Define "live."

I work full time, own a home, am married and have our first child on the way. Right now I have plenty of time to do things I want, which I'm sure will change with the arrival of a child, but nevertheless I feel like I have plenty of time for most things. You have to learn to prioritize and know that some things will go by the wayside and others that didn't seem so important will become so. School takes up a surprising amount of time, I was much happier when I finished school and entered the workforce full time.

Unless you have a job that keeps you away from home for 12-14 hours a day, there is plenty of time to do things other than on weekends.

Best of luck!

Get a job that is lifestyle roster 5/4, 4/5 or 7/7 roster. I'm on a 7/7 roster best thing ever

The biggest problem is school. Your schedule isnt your schedule. Your free time isnt your free time. Your free time is study time and homework time and stress about upcoming exams time. Once you're out of school, your free time IS your free time

Please tell me if you figure it out!

You’re in school (you have to study even when you’re not in class) and you have a job. You basically have two full time jobs. Don’t be so harsh on yourself and try to figure out your schedule so that you have some time to relax. That time is there (even if it’s just an hour to see friends), you just have to find it...or make it. You’ll burn out quickly if you can’t make time to relax a bit.

One thing I learned: don't wait till your day off to get stuff done or your day off will suck. Fit the stuff in like doing dishes at night or throwing laundry in when you have a minute.

Get a Job you love doing!

This is me every day when I think "I'm gonna go home, throw in some laundry, cook/eat, vacuum, etc." not exactly in the order but I try to maximize relax time. But, no matter what, life always has a couple surprises and next thing you know it's about time for bed and I don't even have energy to enjoy myself.

Not to mention, cooking a half decent meal takes a while and not to mention just sitting down and eating it takes a lot of time. I love food, but my god, all the time we spend finding something to eat/cooking/eating we would have SO much time if we never got hungry every couple fucking hours.

There is 120 hours avail between mon-fri, 48 hours for work (40 work + 1 hour lunch each day, i.e. pretty standard). Then 40 hours for sleep (8 hours each night, can reduce this to 30 hours if you can manage 6 hours of sleep a night, I personally can and can't do that in spurts), That leaves on average, 40 hours of commute, daily chores and self care, and free time. Usually this adds up to about 4 hours a day of actual free time once you cut out a 30 min commute for work 1 way (so 1 hours to and from) shower, dinner, etc. How you choose to spend those 4 hours is completely up to you. Right now, I would hold the opinion to address your studies. It is a short term thing while in school until you get a career, and will benefit you in the long run. Most people will have an understanding on this and not take it personally when you decline invitations to events during the week. This is also a big factor in why people lose touch after high school ends. Once you get a career you will likely average down to 2-3 hours of free each day because of entry level positions that put you low on the pole and end up first on list for OT, or bringing work home, or, if your truly passionate about your job, curiosity to explore work related things after work thru research of some sort. Once you hit your 30's (again in traditional terms of doing college directly following high school) you should be climbing the ladder and able to negotiate better positions in your career and not be on the bottom rung any more, the downside is that you are probably now in some form/step of a committed relationship, and may have a child or 2 that takes up your free time with ball games, or or other child related activities. Once you are in you mid-late 30's you should start to actually feel like you have your own personal time again. Established career, children are becoming young adults and hold their own activities, this is when mid life crisis sets in, now much like in grade school, every you have been doing for the last decade and a half is changing, and now you should be in a decent financial position, this is how guys suddenly end up running out and buying a sports car or a new boat or something like that. And you start to connect with others that share your tastes and hobbies, possibly even new hobbies.

sorry for the long and post, and this is from the perspective of a male approaching 40 years old, that did the above in the wrong order but worked hard and had some luck to end up at the same space. Sadly, it is a bit depressing, to become and adult means responsibilities that cut into your free time, but generally, if you will notice, people that just get out of high school and live that mentality of total freedom and brush that responsibility off, generally don't go far in life and will be stuck in dead end jobs, with less than desirable living conditions, etc. Now I'm not saying poverty stricken, or living in the slums, but but not something that you envisioned yourself in when you were a Jr. in high school.

There are exceptions to the above, and this is all just my personal observations, and general averages.

It’s cuz you’re in school. Once you’re done all that energy can be focused on a hobby, relationship or yourself.

It's all fake mate. You spend a little time on the weekend and doctor up as many Instagram posts as you can.

You're trying to compare your current situation of going to school full time and working to what most people experience just working. With school, you are basically working TWO full time jobs. Trust me, when you are done with school and no longer have to study, and only working one job, you will have lots more time on your hands.

I’m in a similar situation. Just holding on until I graduate.

Just focus on finishing school and that should free up your schedule some.

All these events and people that you feel like you are missing out on will understand. I promise you will find the time for what’s really important to you.

Just wait until you decide to have kids.

I work out of a small office that handles calls and scheduling for 30+ locations across the states. I skyrocketed up to one of the highest positions in the office, but was burning out weekly because of odd hours and the stress of the job.

It got to the point where I had a talk with my boss, and basically said if things don't change i'm going up change jobs.

After working with her on my schedule, my personal life is so much better. I work 40 hours a week, get an hour lunch break, and get at least one or two weekends off a month.

I'm on the same schedule essentially as my boyfriend, so we use our time off to recharge. But we also use it to go out to theme parks or the zoo or sometimes the movies. We also vacation like once or twice a year for a few days using PTO.

It took a bit to settle into the adult life, but I like to think i'm doing alright at balancing work and fun. I've even recently started painting again!

I don’t get it either. I’m also going to school and working to support myself. The days I have off make me feel anxious now because it’s rare that I get to sit still anymore. I feel like I’m constantly supposed to be doing something.

Mabey you could listen to some podcasts while driving if the drive is long. But please for the love of God be carefoul on the road.

I work 50 hrs a week 1 day off I sleep about 6 hrs a day I have time for most everything and play league on the side which is very time consuming

Same. I'm permanently exhausted. On top of this I have a wife and son.

I drive 1 hour each way to work. Work 8.5 hours Cook clean and study for my degree, spend time with wife and son. No time to visit other family or have any real social life.

Lives with hobbies lol.

I dont even meet any new people. Work all week and got chores on the weekends. Gotta stay cheap and at home to afford that house sooner or later.

I work 40 hours a week. I have plenty of time. 1 hour driving a day, 8 hours at work, 8 hours asleep, that’s 8 hours to do everything else on weekdays. Weekends are free.

So the rest of shit is like cleaning is all done on Monday, all laundry on tues, etc. you can’t expect to be 100% clean all the time. That’s not how it works.

Realistically you should have 4 hours a day of free time during the week. If you don’t, you’re not managing your time well. Or you’re cleaning too much (that could be plenty of things)

I went straight from High School to doing 40 hours a week with 3hrs comute time each day.

You just have to remind yourself that you're only one person and that you can only do so much or have so much expected from you.

I'm glad I don't work in a position where I take my work home with me too.

Funny cause I have a full time job and a part time job

It’s important to define how you want to live, and structure your decisions around it.

I worked at a huge company and had a good job by other people’s standards and I was miserable and exhausted all the time.

I decided that I value my time and flexibility and found a place where I have that and I can actually do what I’m good at.

It was hard to make that change and I definitely took a risk by going to work for a startup. It was so hard for a while because I was constantly comparing what I was doing to what I thought I wanted.

I turned down an investment banking job in SF to take no salary in ATL, and holy shit I couldn’t be happier. I make almost as much as I would in SF now but my cost of living is 40% less so I can travel, write, and generally fuck around. I know that this is rare, but being happy is actually possible. It starts by taking control and realizing you are the only person looking out for what you want.

I work like 48-55 hour work weeks and I have a family and I still find time( a little time) for my own self.

My last year of college I was working 3 part time jobs. That entire year is like a complete blur of time and I lost a loooot of sleep trying to have a social life in addition to that.

It will be better when you have 1 full time job and no school. Right now you’re devoting extra time to class, homework, and studying. When you have a job (depending on the job) you’ll most likely be able to leave work at the door when you go home. Even if you’re someone (like me) who requires extra decompressing time... just being able to work 40 hours and not have obligations outside of that will be way different than work AND school!

I'm working full-time in IT as a lead developer, trying to manage my life balancing spending spare time with my family (wife + two small kids) and keeping my self current with the latest in tech.

It's tough.

I guess it all comes to time management, but if I'd need to choose between work and my family -- you can always get a new job or change careers, but you can only loose your family once.

The quote John Lennon: "Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans" is pretty accurate, just make sure you are always making the "other plans".

You have to pursue what you want. Not everything is given to you and the grind is real I know.

If you want a lot of time off with your job you have to find one that offers that. School is school and you’re on their schedule.

Don’t take everything as seriously as you possibly can and enjoy the little things. It took me years to get where I am but I have a great paying job with a ton of time off and great benefits.

The busiest I ever was in my life was either taking 18 credits with a lab, 20 hour a week unpaid work study, and still working my 30 hours a week at my job in college during my undergraduate.

This past year I took on another 2 years of school after my undergraduate and there were times I wouldn’t come home for 3 days between, class, clinical, and work. Luckily I can sleep at work but it’s not guaranteed working in emergency services.

Get grinding and it will come to you keep your head up

So here is the thing about ā€œadultingā€ ... you’re NOT going to have the same amount of free time as you did in high school. Long past are the days where you could go home and waste 10 hours on stuff . Or being able to visit your gram on weekends, or whatever you may do.

You have responsibilities now, you have a job. And on top of that, you’re going to school as well. Now, excuse me for my frankness, but when you take a job you’re literally giving away your free time to get money. And when you take classes, you’re spending time learning material.

But let’s do some math to prove that you can have a life. There are 24 hours in a day 8 of which are going to be spent at work/school And another 8 are being spent on sleep. Let’s add on another 2 hours for getting ready and commuting. Which leaves another 6 hours to do things with your life So unless you’re sleeping for 14 hours a day, you should have PLENTY of time to do the things you want.

And as for visiting gram gram, just ask for a couple days off from work, it’s not that hard!

it shouldn't take you 2 hours to prep for work. Fix that, for starters.

Your schedule should clear up some once you gain employment in a real job. GOOD real jobs only work you 40-45 hours a week. Once your education is complete and you have a steady job, the school hours will abate.

Your dreams of adulthood are oddly skewed by your childish dreams. People have to work, sure, but they don't have to be defined by their job (IF they have a good job).

Start company! Immediatly experience the tax benefits and the time for yourself. Work is slavery! Better to be the slave master than the slave. I'm sorry folks, but thats the reality.

I think about this too. With how tech has advanced a lot since 8 hour work days was nationally implemented you'd think the needed hours to make the same yearly pay would go down. With increases in efficiency and business technology we should be making the same yearly rates and work less hours a day/week/month/year. It's disgusting how the companies benefit but we still slave over for more than half of every weekday for our entire adult life.

Sometimes life is just busy and you really cant get all you want, but I will say that budgeting what little free time you do have makes a huge difference.

It may help to take stock of where you currently spend your freetime.

For me personally, I know that my ā€œrelaxingā€ time can sometimes turn into 4 hr video game or netflix binges that actually doesnt reward or relax me as much as maybe a short workout and a good book might.

If Im not careful, I’ll lose 5-10 min here and there throughout the week by just scrolling on my phone. Those minutes add up, or rather, they disappear and Ive gained no sense of reward for them.

TL:DR Track where your free time goes. I bet it’s in mindless internet/screentime. Cutting that down by even half and doing something real would probably yield exponential results.,

Teacher. Nice salary, tons of time off.

Yeah easily, wake up at 5, work at 6, off at 3, shopping and home by 4, free time from 4-10, bed. Full time job with 6 hrs of free time every day and weekends off. Easy peasy.

The School days are the ones you use for any kind of entertainment.

They don't call it a rat race for nothing

Well, you just summed up what I have felt since graduating college. There was a reddit post this morning I loved with a great message as to why we do it all. Helped me think about it in a different way

https://www.reddit.com/r/unpopularopinion/comments/bk3zeh/i_absolutely_love_being_an_adult/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x .

I'll try to find it and post the thread here. But I understand the struggle I work 8-4 my work is an hour drive from my house. plus I have to drop off my dog at daycare because I care about him and want him to have fun so add an additional 20 mins to that drive. So I am up every day at 6:00 am start driving at 630 make it to work at 8. Then when I get off I go to the gym at 5 pm because work is so stuffy. Same drive time or more with traffic. leave the gym at 6 home by 7:30. At this point, because I don't make enough to eat out every day, Cook, Eat and Clean. This typically gives me about an hour of my time a night to relax. As my father told me you have to put the time in now to enjoy it later.

As somebody who graduated last May and started my career just over a month ago:

School sucks. It took up so much of my time.

But in my new reality, there's 168 hours in a week. 40 of those is dedicated to work, that's only 1/4 the total time. Cleaning my house is easy since I have two roommates, we usually dedicate an hour or two once a week to clean the house. My boss routinely works 50-60 hour weeks during construction season, has time to get his kids to their after school programs like soccer etc. He's involved in a leadership club here in town that meets weekly, he's on the board of directors, he is on a soccer AND volleyball team that each meet weekly. He hunts every season, bow and rifle, goes camping 3 times a year for usually around a week.

When you get out of school, most jobs reward you with way more time off. Every hour over 40 I work in a week goes into my comp time savings, and I can either take the cash value of that time at the end of the year or use it to take a vacation.

Time management is one of the most important skills I was forced to develop in college, now I have set days where I will plan out and do like 3-5 errands, leaving me time to relax on my weekends and after work.

It gets easier, but I was surprised at how much time school was taking up when I sat down and looked at it. For most studies you'll see around 30-40 hours dedicated to class and homework, especially when finals or big projects roll around.

Power through it friend, post-college life is fucking incredible and I find myself actually looking forward to the next 30+ years of work.

My issue right now is going to class is the only time I’m not working on classwork. I wake up, go to class for a ā€œbreakā€, then work on projects until 2am. Do people really have majors where they have free time? If I have free time it means I’m not working hard enough.

For me, it's one of those things where I prioritize how I want to spend my free time. I work full time (8 am - 5 PM M-F), and I currently attend college online full time. I also do daily chores, and play with/walk my dogs every day. On Mondays I play Dungeons and Dragons for 4 hours, and on Thursdays I make it a priority to take the afternoon for myself, whether playing video games, reading, date night with the wife, etc. Saturdays, I usually have a social day with friends, where I am out of the house for the entire day, though those are the first to drop if I have homework to do. Every Sunday I spend at least 4 hours doing homework, sometimes up to 12.

Honestly, it sucks a lot of the time, but I find pushing myself on days I'm already busy and already stressed really allows me to fully enjoy the off days more.

Now get some children in the mix and ask that question again. I too sometimes wonder how the hell i can do anything besides my job, household and kids.

Things get ridiculously easier once you are out of school. Think of how much time you spend in class, traveling to class, studying, doing homework, etc. Also consider the added stress you are successfully dealing with. Once all of that is removed, you gain a shitload of hours back and can rest easier. Best of all, you know how to live your life while being productive for 80+ hours per week. Now, a 40-50 hour week of productivity will seem like a cakewalk.

Look for little efficiency increases in your life. How much time do you spend on your phone before bed? If you exercise, review your class notes while doing your cardio. Can you multitask certain portions of your daily routine tasks? Things like that can add up.

Most importantly, do not neglect your sleep. That extra hour you are considering using to stay up and study would be put to better use getting more rest.

Speaking personally, getting to the other end of the work+education grind is a huge load off your shoulders. Keep pushing; this is only temporary. "Adult life" is liberating and much better than others on this site make it out to be, if you have the right mindset.

I have more time in my life since full time job. Because when the work day is over it means 100% free time. After the school/university was over it meant more studying at home.

i know it can be devastating thinking about this because ive been there, now i say ive been there because im no longer in that situation, yes i do work a lot but i have more financial freedom and free time.

i think to myself that i will never stop working until i can be making money while i sleep poop or eat, if you dont have financial freedom you will never be free.

this society is built like this to keep us working forever and wait for retirement, but if you play your cards in a smart way you can actually achieve freedom, i have been on the 2 ends of the rope, to much free time but no money and to much money but no freedom, i came to realize that i need my own source of income where i can decide what to do with my time, and not go mindlessly to work for 9 hours a day 5 days a week.

There's nothing wrong to be a drone but honestly is not for everybody, sometimes its soul destroying but having the comfort and security of knowing you will have money every two weeks its more appealing for some people.

being your own boss requires sweat blood and dedication, if you want to start your business like i am doing while working at an office, you need to think that you might not rest even saturdays and sundays but it will pay off on the long run.

don't weaken, build character and think about how your future self will praise you for the smart decisions and hard work you have made.

Well it helps not going to school, luckily I got a good job without finishing up my degree. I work 9-6 and close from home so commute back and forth is an hour tops. When i get home, I generally only have 3 hours before I'm back asleep again but that's why I look forward to the weekend because that's when I truly unwind.

I sleep about 3-4 hours night on weekdays. I do everything after work like hangout with friends, clean, visit, whatever. the weekends are my sleep 12-15 hours and chill days.

Poor youngling, you have no clue of the real life ahead of you. I am truck driver and work 70h a week

Lol 40 hours. I was working 55-60 hours a week.

The key is to find a job and colleagues you like. So work is much less a prision haha

You’re single so everything you do is by yourself. Once you get married you don’t have to clean everyday and if you pick up after yourself as you go then you don’t have much to do when you do clean.

You go to school on your weekends. You study when you get home. You also do all the cooking when you get home.

Finally, you take two hours getting ready which is ridiculous.

I get up and work out, get showered and ready, and all that takes me an hour an a half. When I get home some days I cook and some days I don’t. That still leaves with at least three-four hours to do whatever I want. Admittedly I don’t get enough sleep.

I’m in bed at 1am and wake up at 7:30. I leave the house at 9 and get to work around 9:30-10. Leave there between 6-7pm. Home by 7 most nights but 8 at the latest. That leaves me at the least 8-1 to do whatever I want. On weekends I get more time.

I work full time, and run a business full time.

I spend all day juggling sysadmin tasks for two companies from 9-5, and a lot of times late into the night. I spend my free time with my son and wife, but it amounts to an absolute paltry amount of time in comparison to what I do working.

I don't believe people are meant to live like this, I certainly don't want to continue this in perpetuity, but for the time being that's where I'm at. And it's stressful, but at least in my mind it's working towards a larger goal.

I've worked all of my life in IT, for companies who don't respect my work/life balance, who don't care to even attempt to understand that I might want to spend time with my son, or that it isn't reasonable for me to come fix something on site, and that taking a toddler with me at 2am just isn't an option. So my resolution has been starting my own company, working for myself, and trying my damnedest not to become exactly like that. So that one day I can not be go,go,go all the time, and I can pass that relief onto my employees as well.

I could probably get on a nice red soapbox about this, but human beings are not the sum total of their labor value. It just happens to be the one resource we all share, and what is most often time exploited at our detriment. It shouldn't be considered acceptable that you work 9-5 Monday through Sunday, and have to sacrifice meaningful human connection so that you can be a wage slave to someone elses benefit.

7:00am - wake up

7:10am - get out of bed

7:11am - piss

7:13am - put on same clothes from yesterday that are lying on floor.

7:15am - eat cereal

7:30am - brush teeth, deodorant, etc.

7:35am - leave house

8:00am - get to work

5:00pm - leave work

5:30pm - get home

5:30pm-11:00pm - whatever I feel like.

Bruh. It’s only the beginning too.

I’m a full time student. I have 2 children that require ballet and soccer activities. Widely duties to cook and clean, and I work 40-48 hours a week.

Not sure how the fuck I do it, but you do.

Yeah it's weird, people ask how you are and you joke like "I wish I was dead!" And they look at you like wtf? Like seriously don't bs me this crap is worthless and life is too long

I cut back on my sleep.

I have a full time job and here is my schedule. By the way I have a lot of time for my self and family.

Mon~ thurs 7am~6Pm work fri sat sun off.

School wed nights. Come home at 10pm. 1 class

3 Online classes.

The big thing is online classes. Look into it. Not talking about for profit schools and other junk college.

Actual community colleges and great state universities have online classes and degrees for working individuals.

You work full time which is 8 hours each day and then 8 hours each day on the weekend for school, you get ready for 2 hours. Every day you use up 10 hours for things you can't change. The body needs 6 hours sleep minimum so that leaves you with 8 hours for yourself each day, you eat and blah blah stuff for two hours every day now you have 6.

Homework, studying etc. You can hang out with friends while studying to not only save time and energy but socialize studying is different for all but from those 6 hours you have every day, don't simply 'relax' by doing nothing, you can relax while enjoying yourself and being productive. Don't make excuses, when you don't have time you make it. Speaking from experience in similar situation

I just don't ever get enough sleep, I average 6 hours a night. Then on the weekends I sleep a little more

Shoot for early retirement. Checkout Choosefi.com. A community for early retirement.

Maybe its much less about loving what you do, and more about creating a life you actually want to live. So often we focus on what we want to ā€œdoā€ when we grown up. ā€œMake sure it’s something that you love!ā€ But we don’t think about how that thing we ā€œdoā€ only provides us with so much about of time left over in the day. Maybe decide how you want to live? Then do whatever it takes to get there. If you wanna travel or have time to spend with family and loved ones. Find something that can get you there, even if it’s not necessarily something you ā€œloveā€. Just a thought

I would first consider that a lot of adults are not working a full-time job and going to school at the same time. You clearly have a lot on your plate, and that's why your free time is limited.

Here's an example of my day as a working professional:

  • Wake up 7AM

  • Shower, dress, eat a banana, etc, out the door by 745AM

  • Get to work around 8AM

  • Out of work earliest 4PM, latest 6PM (rare)

I typically go to bed around midnight and get 7 hours of sleep, so this leaves me 6-8 hours a day of free time on a weekday.

Typically gives me enough time to:

  • Make and eat dinner (0.5 - 1 hour)
  • Go to gym, 3x a week (.75 - 1.25 hours)
  • Chores (usually an hour or so a couple times a week)

So I typically get at least a couple of hours to dick around and play video games, watch TV, whatever. It's not bad at all. Then obviously I have weekends to relax and do stuff I want to do.

Looking at your schedule:

(shower+makeup+outfit+driving there=2 hours prior to my shift)

Do you have a long commute? Getting ready in the morning and getting to work taking 2 hours seems like a long time.

at work

obviously working takes up a LOT of time, and yes, it can disheartening to think 8-10 of your day every day gets sucked away. but that's just how it is. eventually, you'll get better jobs that are more satisfying to actually do, and maybe a bit more relaxed. for instance, i get lunch breaks, i dick around during the day, even run errands here and there.

at school (the two days I have as a ā€œweekendā€ are the two days I go to school)

Consider that school will end eventually. You won't be in school your whole life and suddenly you'll have a lot more free time.

doing laundry, cleaning, grocery shopping, getting gas, etc

I mean yep, this is part of being an adult, and it certainly gets aggravating. But if you just chip away at it here and there, it shouldn't take up more than a half hour to an hour in a day.

I feel like it’s just a given in the US that everyone is gritty enough to work 40 hours AND clean the house AND have a social life AND have a bunch of side hobbies

you just have to find the time. we all do it. you just have a lot on your plate with school, more than the average person

you'll figure it out, don't stress out

Is this a... what day is this?

welcome to adulthood. No quit complaining and get back to work

dont spend so much time cleaning, doing makeup, etc. it shouldnt take you 2 hours to get ready before work

If you work a regular 40 hour a week job that's 8 hours a day. A day have 24 hours - the 8 hours of normal sleep. 24-16 = 8 hours. You have 8 hours to yourself to do anything you want. Even if you had 1 hour commute times that's still 6 hours to do anything.

They don’t, thats the point.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pUanS5OWy_k&list=PL_saLI-LH-Vp9cxB3FNJoYXZXRM93UBuf&index=6&t=0s

Hey sis, I hear ya. And I'm here to tell ya that it's totally possible to nail that work/life balance and still keep your health and relationships intact. I have a full-time job M-F, a side hustle retail job Saturday and Sunday (usually a full 8 hour shift both days), and I'm on the board of a local advocacy organization. I'm pretty busy. And I've been working seven days a week for about a year now. Folks are concerned! And they have been for a while, but I honestly feel fine enough to keep on going until I have to stop.

My tip for you is to keep your schedule really tight, and get your priorities in order. I keep an old school written planner and it's full of checklists, highlighting, and events as far in advance as I can write down. Here in Seattle, my retail job requires 3 weeks notice for time off, so that pushes things out pretty far. If friends want to do something spontaneous, it's not likely I can come thru. If they want to plan time to hang, I can probably make it happen.

On how to save some time in your day:

-Girrrl, why are you spending so much time in the morning getting ready? I am out the door in half an hour on my workdays. It might help to have "uniforms" or pre-set outfits in your closet. I rotate my clothes and wear them twice before laundering. Because honestly who cares? At this point I don't. I also don't shower every single day. I've heard it's a POC thing, but I also just got used to it from living in California during the drought.

-I don't spend a lot of time cooking. I'll do the meal prep thing and push out 2 hours of cooking one day and kick back the rest. I really take advantage of frozen stuff but keep an eye on eating healthy when I can.

M-F, I get home from work about 6:00 pm. I work out at home for half an hour, then eat. It's around 7:30 pm by this point. This is my "free time" where I do some chores or for you, maybe studying. I'm in bed by 10:30 pm and up by 7:00 am. On the weekends, my free time is after my work shift, which could end around 5:00 pm.

Fyi, I do have friends and family that I love and I do spend time with them. I also have a cat at home and a boyfriend that visits often, so I'm really grateful that it has worked out so far. My last piece of advice to you is, be forgiving of yourself if you're having a bad day. Sometimes I have piles of laundry laying around or piles of dishes that need to be washed. I know I will get to it eventually and it's okay. Same for nap time. Sometimes I am just beat after work and need a nap, and that kills my productivity for the rest of the day. That's totally okay as well.

Best of luck sis! Welcome to adulting.

So let's look at an average day in the life of SoDelirius on a weekday: Sleep 10PM-530AM, 7.5 hours. Work 830-5, 8.5 hours. So right there is 16 hours, when I was in the states that left me about 8 hours to do everything that you are talking about because while I was working I was also going to school full time as well. Some days I may need to do something extra like take my animal to the vet(I have 5) or something adult like that but in general shopping would only be done 2-3 times a week for an hour at most. I feel like I have tons of time to do whatever I want and spent a lot of time playing video games. I feel like people who don't have time are either wasting time and not realizing it or are just very distractable or slow. I have a lot of friends who never have time but only one of them do I actually believe because she owns a non-profit and works a full time job at the same time.

You have to prioritize what's important to you. Right now you're prioritizing work and school, which is really important, but keep in mind, that if you keep putting yourself first before others then sooner or later you may be all you have.

I worked 2 jobs and went to school full time while maintaining a good GPA. I didn't have time for anything.

Relationships faltered, stress levels skyrocketed, and I came out of college virtually broken.

There's nothing I wish more than to go back, slow down, and enjoy the process.

They don't. ā˜¹ļø

Wait until you have kids on top of that and you’ll wonder what you did with all your spare time.

Throw a couple of kids in the mix and it really gets interesting.

Nope

They don't for many, nobody that I personally know. It's a huge part of our culture, but try not to fall for it. There are plenty of good paying part time jobs out there, just make your life expenses revolve around it. You don't have to match your expenses to a full time job wage, you don't need all those cars or houses. Life is short, fuck full time.

I used to have so many friends and they're all lost to their fulltime jobs pretty much. The story is the same, they have a girlfriend and they don't even get to spend as much time as they'd like with them so of course a lot of friends get lost. So they not only don't effectively juggle their friends, maybe their ultra close friends get squeezed in here and there assuming availability has lined up (one of my friends tried to meet up once but I was in school), and they still don't even have real time for themselves because it's spent sleeping.

My mother worked a full time job and I didn't get to see her at all. She was working and sleeping, that was her life. She had no social life. It got even worse when her job didn't line up with my school hours. She later would work two other jobs on top of it, you can imagine how that went.

Seriously, I have never seen it work out for anyone without losing so much and it feels like some of them even don't get to enjoy their money if their bosses even pushes ridiculous hours (like what happened to two of my friends). Fuck full time.

Well, here in Europe 5 weeks of paid holidays is pretty much baseline, also some more bank holidays which easily go to 7 weeks of a year. Varies by country ofc but not that much. Counting weekends in, we work 62% of days a year.

I've always described my days in thirds. 8 hours a piece. One is for work. The second is for social or personal hobbies. The third being sleep. (If I actually get 8 hours.) It takes time to find that balance. I couldn't stand working 10 hour days for 6 days a week. It seemed soul crushing. In your situation, you're working towards a goal that will allow you to balance your lifestyle. Keep working hard and you'll eventually find the time you're seeking.

I work full time normal day shifts as an Engineer, married, 3 kids (3 month old, 1 and a half year old, 3 year old)

I'm up at 6 everyday (weekends included) to feed the kids and help get them ready, at work from 7:30ish to 5 ish, home to cook/eat then just try to keep our sanity and interact with kids until they are all asleep at 8:30 (hopefully). Then cleaning/dishes/house up keep/prep kids stuff for the next day (ZERO time for any of this when kids are awake) usually takes an hour and a half. Then I have and hour to spend time with my wife/watch tv/work out/play video games/whatever before I start getting ready to go to bed at 11. Add in the nightly feeding for the baby and taking the 3 year old to pee twice per night so he doesnt wet the bed and I dont get much time for myself or to relax. I get about 5-6 hours of sleep per night depending on how the kids sleep that night and If I want more I have to completely cut out my hour of down time.

My point being that it only gets worse with the more responsibilities that you get and you either just decide to get used to it or get stressed and depressed about it. (I go back and forth between the two on a weekly basis)

You just learn to prioritize what you want to get done or how you want to relax in the little time you have. (it helps to not think about your friends lives without the same responsibilities as you... that shit gets the jealousy going really bad)

good luck, it will get better once school is done.

You're already doing a lot of stuff.

You need to prioritise in life to be able to do all of those things you say.

I had a phase where I was working 8am-8pm, eating and then working on side projects from 9pm-1am plus 12+ hours at weekends.

I lasted about 3 months before I completely burned out.

You're doing a huge amount already and should be proud. A lot of people say working and studying destroys their lives. Keep up the hard work and eventually you'll have you'll 8 hour shift and you'll realise you have time.

School and work is different than just a full time job. With a full time job you have one thing to do during a set amount of time and then you’re done and can do what you want. With school you have classes, a job, homework, housework, and then try and fit a social life.

I’m graduating tomorrow but I’ve been working full time in summers since I was 15. My advice is that while school is important, every grade you get won’t matter that much. Obviously do your best and get good grades, but that 10 point project that can be done in 10 minutes but you spend 50 doing it to make it perfect isn’t worth it. While college is mostly about the education you need social time.

It’s hard to balance work/school life and it’s different for everyone, but once it’s just work you realize you have a lot more free time than you’d think. Especially if you’re single and living on your own.

I like my job. I am coaching pensioners.

I'm going through work full time 40 hours per week on a Friday to Tuesday schedule.

And I go to school full time (but in the evenings) from 6pm to 10pm Monday to Thursday.

So I basically never have a day off. And I have only 2 days per week where I actually have time in the evening to do stuff. And I think my girlfriend struggles to understand why I don't feel like going out to the bar on my "time-off". I need to catch up on laundry, meal-prep, cleaning the house, paying bills, etc.

I'm so excited to get those 4 hours a night back. They are precious. Use them wiseley.

You dont live. You are a slave lmao

Das life.

Unless you're rich, then you get to do whatever

I wish people would stop defending this fucked up dystopian system and just telling you to manage your time better...

WHAT TIME?

If you work full time that fundementally means that your lifetime revolves around your job, and all we have as humans as a medium to experience life through is TIME, anything you do that isn't enjoyable or getting you close to true happiness and self love is a waste of fucking time and you're holding us all back if you have a different opinion to be honest.

It's beneath our dignity as spiritual WHOLE human beings to force ourselves to live in a system that isn't based around genuinely aesthetic principles and human values and that is designed to depress us for capital gain, WAKE UP.

Take yourself out of the momentum of the culture you were raised in by parents who couldn't think of anything better for you, whose parents couldn't think of anything better for them...

And think about where you are and what you actually want, the immediate felt presence of the moment is all we have and all of us are wasted spending our time doing these robotic tasks.

The only thing that people actually want is to feel loved and whole, but we live in a world where people don't even know this anymore, we think we want ideology and THINGS..

We're only doing this because we can't think of anything better to do and it's just gonna be generation after generation of loveless traumatic boring lives where nothing is accomplished if we don't fight for a less pointless and more open and loving existence.

Let's stop building walls and weapons and hoarding resources.. our technology is getting too powerful to continue on this path.. we need people do truly do what is good for themselves, and that is to live in love.

Not to be a "do gooder" and thinking how you're supposed to think due to the current political trends.. The world will change and your opinions will look ridiculous in a hundred years unless they are truly your own.

Don't follow, don't believe and don't consume. Create, learn and love.

It sickens me that if you give people the option to take shelter from their own responsibility to make an interesting story about their own lives that nobody has ever read before, or instead follow someone elses program, people will freely become a robot so that they can have what they are told will make them happy.

Yeah I'm offended and have a problem with most of the top rated comments here, you think you're helping OP but you're really just holding back our collective progress.

The world doesn't need followers right now. Working full time is bullshit, mortgages are bullshit, rent prices are bullshit, nuclear weapons and Calvin Klein underwear is bullshit... you are free, you are whole, you are here NOW.

You have no obligation to be who you were 5 minutes ago or two years ago, we can change this whole thing around right now on our own, we have imaginations, and we are all the same loving awareness beset by the pain of having a body that is disconnected from our source.

Earn a job that allows flexibility. I come into work by 8am, leave around 1-2ish. If I don't have errands, I come home and continue to work. If I do, I'll go run errands and then come home and work. I'm told at any other company, this wouldn't fly.

I'm a full time university student and also work part time. To be honest, I ask myself this everyday. Because I'm either commuting, at school, at work, cleaning, doing homework/studying, etc. However, personally, on free weekends, I feel like whatever I do that isn't my typical weekday routine is extra special and that kinda keeps me going

I often felt this way until my job offered to let me continue working for them from home when I put in my two weeks notice, because I was moving out of state.

Now, I wake up at 7:30, work, use little breaks here and there to shower and do random house chores, work through lunch, off by 3:30. I go to bed around 12:30, so that gives me 9 hours of free time, 8 hours of work, and 7 hours of sleep. Subtract an hour somewhere to meal prep dinner and tomorrow’s lunch.

Seriously, if you can swing a remote schedule with your work, even part time, and are fairly antisocial, do it. It’s life changing if you can stay focused and deal with minimal social interaction. Hoping this also doesn’t come across as a humblebrag either, just trying to encourage people to give it a shot if they can!

Honestly? We don't. I teach at a University and I hear students complain about not having free time constantly and generally speaking, college is peak free time. If you are working, that disappears and you're basically just dealing with what normal adult life is now.

I have to wake up at 6:30am to have enough time to shower, get ready, make coffee and then sit through morning rush hour traffic and get to work by 8am. I leave at 5pm but I won't be walking through my front door until maybe 6pm, depending on traffic. Then I'll have anywhere from 45-90 minutes of general stuff that needs to get done. Walk the dog, check the mail & sort it, unload the dishwasher, some other random daily/semi-daily chores. Then I have to get some exercise in, so I'll do that for maybe 30 min (I should do more for the body type I want but something has to give). Then I shower and start prepping dinner for my wife and I. We'll eat and hang out for around an hour and so after dinner & hanging out it's usually around 8:30-9:00. So then I have about an hour or hour and half to read or play video games or watch TV with my wife. Then I need to start getting ready for bed (walk the dog again, load up the dish washer and run it, wipe down the counters, brush teeth, get changed, etc) and usually decompress from all of that for about 30 minutes in bed before I actively try to sleep.

So yeah, in a typical day I spend all of my time getting ready for work, getting to work, working, getting back from work, doing unpaid work (i.e. chores) and then just a tiny fraction of time that I actually enjoy. The vast majority of my life is just hanging on trying to get through a work week and then desperately trying not to binge on free time during the weekend because if I do, I'll be behind on larger projects/chores and then the next week is 100% work all day every day.

And this is life. Don't get me wrong, I like teaching but it just feels like I am wasting away the majority of my time on this planet because that's just "how it is". I daydream all the time about just running away from modern society, doing something to make enough just to scrape by and then actually being able to live more of my life on my own terms.

You clean as you go, spill something, clean it. It takes a maximum of 1 hour to hoover a house, even that's generous. On the way home go to the shops, grab what you need and cook, but cook more than you need and freeze the rest into portions. Ironing, do it in one hit, 7 days of clothes should take no more than a couple of hours. So far we've achieved it all and we're about 6 hours into our week. Go to work for 45 hours. Sleep 56 hours. Total time spent doing shit you have to, 101 hours, lose an hour 5 days for getting ready, that's 56 whole hours left. If you can't find time for a hobby, then you're spending too much time on reddit.

Edit: probably should mention this is the life of a 30 something guy with no kids or SO, I do what I want when I want. My life is awesome now that I think about it.

Lol here i am 4hrs of sleep cus i was up watch GoT. Going to my full time job. I was doing the same as you school on my 2 days off, but i dropped out. It was stressing me out so much i decided to leave cus what good is it if im not happy.

If you are concerned with having time to yourself as an adult please don’t have kids. You have been warned.

I feel like you have a lot on your hands with work AND studying but here's my two cents.

Have a schedule, a consistent one, wake up X time sleep at X time. After you have that, try to introduce whatever you want to introduce into it. You'll have a clearer picture of where your time's going and what things aren't really necessary. Good luck šŸ™‚

It’s a grind for sure. The struggle is real. 10 years to retirement and I can’t wait to get off of the daily treadmill. I get paid well and mostly like my job but I miss having a life. It seems like your whole life is dedicated to bringing home a paycheck. I’m so burned out by Friday I sleep 1/2 the day on Saturday and before you know it I’m back in bed and wake up on Sunday realizing I have to work tomorrow. Years and years and years of it. You ask a good question and the answer is you really don’t have time to live except watching tv before going to bed and working tomorrow. I’m a roller coaster junkie and that is my escape. Once you enter the park it’s like everything disappears and it’s 100% fun. I also like squeezing in rounds of disc golf when I can. But everything is chained to your job. If you like your job it helps but by the time you retire almost your entire life is suffocated by the routine you describe where everything revolves around working. After 40 years of this it just eats your life away...week after week, month after month and year after year. I’m going to be so pissed if I die before I retire. That would suck so bad. The retirement age is so high it seems like you barely have anytime left to fully commit to things you like. Life isn’t fair.

I skip out on quite a bit of social stuff because of this. I’m always looking for ways to save time on things. Recently picked up a Roomba for my new apartment, it has laminate flooring and kitty litter would get everywhere. Now every day I come home and I don’t need to sweep, or at least feel the need to sweep. It’s only 10 minutes saved, but each day it adds up.

Ideally in each weekday you have 8 hours of sleep, 8 hours of work, and 8 hours of free time. Where, as you've discovered, the 'free time' is used for all the sort of 'life maintenance' tasks you have. Some folks have things set up well enough that they can get all the maintenance done and still have time left over. Other folks are well off enough that they can pay other people to do some of the maintenance. You're filling a lot of yours with school, so that makes it tougher.

The reality is that most people have to sacrifice somewhere to gain in other areas. Loads of folks sleep less. Others let the housework slide. Some lucky few can steal time from work. Lots of people just don't have any real down time.

Just say Fuck it more often

After going to college, where I worked full time in addition to taking classes full time, only having 1 job seems easy. I have lots of free time every evening and on the weekends. You make plans accordingly. There is plenty of time to have a social life. To have a fun social life, you work hard and make money! I think it's all about perspective. ... remember you get vacations and personal days at work too when you need a bit of extra time to do stuff.

Once you finish school, it will relax a bit, even working full time. Hang in there- this too shall pass. But for now, handle it and dont apologize for making your life better by getting an education and supporting yourself. Enjoy the small moments you do get and be grateful you are able to work and support your life. Congrats on being a bad ass!

I work fulltime - I find I have lots of time to do what I want. I drive about 30 min to work and 40 min home (traffic varies morning to afternoon, I can't figure out why). Wake up at 7, leave the house at 7:45, start work at 8:15, reddit over lunch, get home around 5:15 and then I have like 5 whole hours to do whatever the fuck I want every single day. You can get so much relaxing done over 5 hours. Cooking and eating takes about an hour, during which I will rock out to my favourite tunes or listen to an audiobook, watch a TV show or episode of something while eating and then I still have over 3 hours left for some hardcore relaxing or gyming, or errands/chores. To be extra efficient sometimes I do all my errands/shopping before I even get home so that my hometime is totally uninterrupted. If you're even just doing a little bit of productive house-cleaning/adulting over the week your weekend are FREE! And full of sleeping and fun and visiting family and friends. Sometimes a friend will come over for dinner on a weekday and we will cook and chill together, or I will go to their place and be fed and chill. I have zero complaints about adulting. Adulting is great.

Is this a... what day is this?

You don't until you graduate (or drop out.) Being a college student is a full time job in of itself.

You don’t, I work up to 69 hours a week, that’s 12 hours everyday except for Saturday for 9 hours. My only spare time is going to the gym for 1 hour, cooking dinner and sleep. And whatever is left of my weekend is mostly spent catching up on sleep. It’s hard and I definitely wouldn’t go it for the rest of my life. It’s alright since I’m young but this isn’t the life I want

So you work a full time job (where you waste 2.5hrs each day getting ready and commuting) AND go to school on the weekends? Why do you think you would ever have "free" time?

Most adults don't go to school which gives us 32hrs on the weekend to do whatever we want.

How long do you sleep every night?

I would suggest taking a month and tallying all of your activities, everything you do and see how much time you are spending on each. Also, get an app that keeps track of screen time on your phone. How much time are you wasting there?

I felt similarly working full time lunch and dinner shifts as a cook. I switched to morning shifts and although I have to wake up early now (around 430 am) I'm out of work everyday by or before noon. I'm able to enjoy my dog, write/ record my music, work on band needs, and have even been able to start teaching guitar again on some days. Overall I'm much happier and less stressed in life. Maybe that's an option?

[deleted]

This is what's it like right now for me, I'm an apprentice at the a pipe fitters union. We work a lot, typically 50-60 hours a week spread over 5-6 days. I have class on tues and Wednesday after work. However I know that sticking with it will lead to a significantly higher salary once I complete my apprenticeship. I've got just under 4 years left of this type of work. At which point the increase in pay will allow me to not work nearly as much while making more. I'm hoping to work 40 hour weeks once I get there. That would leave my a 3 day weekend.

First off you doing school and work so of course you have no time for social life. Second a full time job is only 40 hours a week if your not going to school you have plenty time to enjoy your day. For me I like my job so I don’t hate having not as much time as you would think. Also when you went to high school did you hang out with your friends and do hw kinda of the something now but you get paid...

Weekends bro...

24hrs /day

  • 8 hrs work/school
  • 1 hr ablutions (shower, dress, make-up, etc)
  • 2 hrs commuting
  • 2 hrs personal care (bathroom, eating, etc)
  • 1 hr home care (vacuum, dishes, etc)
  • 7 hrs sleep

Leaves 3 hrs / day for "other stuff". Which includes, but is not limited to, studying, friends, entertainment, family, hobbies, self-improvement, healthcare, emergencies, and more!

Basically, we're all running on empty and utterly ragged. It gets easier when you can quite the "second job," (school, in your case), which gives you an extra 20 hours a week, so you can offload a lot of your entertainment and hobbies to the weekend, but you'll still have only 3 hours or so during the weekdays.

I work in healthcare and my contract is 3 days on/4 off

That also means if I use 36 hours of pto, that's almost a 2 week vacation

If you need more time, find a job or position that gives you more time. I'm not trying to be an ass, it's not easy, but if something is important to you, make it happen, negotiate for it.

Nobody has time, you have to make the time, I'd try to get ahead of my studies, I'd let things go in my apartment, I'd eat out or buy frozen foods, I'd be as efficient with my time as possible, like when shopping at Target, I'd use the app so I can just pick up at the counter instead of shopping arond the store.

Weekends pretty much, if it's just the full time job then you should be able to do stuff from Friday night till Sunday then it's back to the grind

I'm an unemployed lazyass and haven't done actual work for a single day in my life but I have decent living standards because my country has too good welfare systems. After not doing anything for YEARS this is exactly why I'm afraid of getting a job.

First I'd have to learn to wake up every day before sunrise and you can imagine how much I hate the idea after years of being able to sleep whenever I want. Then I'd have to sacrifice all of my free time and energy to study for a job for 2-7 years which would also reduce the amount of money I have for each month. Only then I'd be ready for a standard wage job that continues to destroy my free time and energy for decades. Sure, getting a job would allow me to purchase a new video game or two per month but then I'd have no time to play any of them. I'd have to start drinking myself numb every Friday like everyone else who got stuck in this stupid treadmill of life.

I have no motivation to study for a well-paying job because I'm okay with the money I get now so any job I could realistically get is too shit to be worth my time. I don't think it would be possible to find a job I could really enjoy so much that I wouldn't want to kill myself every morning.

It’s easier to have free time once you get married or at least have a devoted partner. It’s one of the few benefits to settling down with someone.

Days are 24 hours long. I work 8 hours, sleep 8 hours, and then have 8 hours to myself. Plus I have weekends.

Welcome to adulthood where you must set priorities. If seeing your grandmother is important it needs to become a priority. That means something else takes second seat. That also doesn't mean you have to stop doing something but you may do it less often or at a later time.

As someone who (I assume is similar age to you) (19M), I really don't see a problem with it, for the majority of the year I've worked a 45 hour week, with tutors on both my 2 days off, I revise throughout the days off. But I get home a 5-6 or 9 on my work days which is plenty of time to have a hobby, or to have a few nights out a week.

Either I work 9-5 or 11-8, either way I have so much time after/before work.

I have had 3 other friends who have had a relatively similar year to me complain they have no time, but spend all their free time on their phones at home....

Are you telling me you don't have a free hour or two everyday to do something you enjoy, if not, you are either working too long hours or you have poor time management tbh. Sorry to be brutal but this is what I told those mates and now they have "more free time".

I appreciate I am a guy so don't spend as much time in the morning getting ready, but after work my points still stand.

tl;dr, it sucks but get used to it, everyone else does.

Depends on the job/work. I work full time, have 3 days off every week and 5 days off in a row every 3 weeks. I have so much free time, I legit feel guilty to see how much other people work, seems awful.

Sleep deprivation.

The biggest difference of being an ā€œadult,ā€ is your time outside of work becomes your own. Sure there are horror stories of having to be tethered to a cell phone or tablet to answer emails or whatever, but if you land a normal hours m-f gig, weekends are yours and so are evenings. No homework, no studying, no projects, no papers, etc. Thats the kind of shit that really eats up your time and you begin to think of as just normal .

This is my experience because I felt the same way in college:

I think one thing that contributes to feeling like there’s no time is many part time jobs are retail or fast food. Which means your weekends and evenings are possibly used up for work. Meanwhile during the week you may have morning classes, afternoon or evening which isn’t too bad EXCEPT you have things like homework and reading and projects. Stuff OUTSIDE of the actual class itself. This all takes time.

Once I graduated college and got a 9-5 job, I felt I had MORE time immediately. Predictability in your schedule is a huge thing because you can plan around it. Sure, sometimes people wanna do things on a day you work but you always know when you’re working or not.

For things like cleaning and doing laundry, cleaning can be done incrementally. Just as you cook or something clean up. Then it doesn’t take hours to do. For laundry, just toss it in and walk away. Only care about it when the chimes go off. Grocery shopping is a bitch, I hate it, but it’s because I hate shopping. However, it really doesn’t take that much time. Maybe 1-1.5hr at most. Out of the 6 you have after work.

Where it DOES suck is in the morning. Gotta wake up at like 5:30 to work at 7 unless your commute is insane. Use the commute to listen to audiobooks or something.

TL;DR It’s really not that bad. School takes up a LOT of time w/ studying and it’s all over the place class times. Prt time jobs are often unpredictable and generally use up your weekends. Working full time after school always mean a 9-5 job, but you don’t have to study. Weekends are great. Don’t underestimate how long that can be. Just understand your schedule and learn to take a few minutes to an hour here and there just tidying up or doing small chores so that it doesn’t take hours all at once.

I'm 17, so I can't really answer this question. It's always been on my mind though, pretty scared to leave school. I thought it would never end, but here it is already.

This is all false. Girls don’t poop

Traditionally men are the breadwinners and women are the homemakers and then they spent time as a family.

If both people are breadwinners. It throws a wrench in the plan. Now they gotta make more money to hire a nanny, housekeeper, gardener, private school, after school programs, save for more taxes, more vacation, buy more cars and insurance, another wardrobe, etc. Do y’all see what’s happening. At the end of the day family time is just catch up time.

It's actually not difficult at all. People just like to winge.

A day is 24 hours long. 7 for sleep leaves you with 17 hours. Then you have 8 hours for work, which leaves you with 9 hours.

If you can be efficient with getting ready every day, it shouldn't take you longer than an hour.

That leaves you with 8 hours to do whatever you want. That's a lot of free time each day. And that doesn't even include weekends, where you're likely not to be working at all.

Viva la revolucion

It ends up with anxiety on Sunday, and moan on Monday when alarm goes off:"whyyyy this again, whyyyyyyy no balance?" And here we go again...

You give up on having a life and wait til retirement.

Then you’re too old to do anything.

Then you die.

Be tired a lot. Stay on top of obvious chores. Prioritise things you love.

So personally, its exhausting to have a social life. I don't get weekends, instead I get two random weekdays. But I was able to request to not work past 6 on Fridays to play D&D with friends, and I generally hang out with people after 10. My entire friend group sort of relies on the idea that retail jobs generally end around the same time.

Time management. I schedule time to work out/study/ and do my hobby. Also I dont have kids or anything, so that makes life easier.

Time(School + job > job) As long as you don’t work your self to death you have wayyyyy more time after school, as long as your not working in the medical field.

I don't have a long commute but I work 50-60 hours a week... and generally my sleeping habits would kill most people.

Grocery and whatnot on my short days. Cook enough for multiple days so my long days I just go home, reheat food and relax or eat out and hang out with friends, ect.

It can be difficult to juggle sometimes but far from impossible.

It doesn't really get any better I'm afraid, people just get better at managing it. If you're lucky enough to live within a 30 minute commute of a "standard" 5 day 40 hour a week job you're still dedicating 10 hours a day to being away from home for your job, assuming an hour lunch. That leaves 14 hours in a day. Subtract 8 hours for sleep, you've got 6 hours left. Perhaps you need an hour to wake up, get showered, eat some breakfast, get dressed etc, so that leaves you 5 hours. Then there's at least an hour for dinner. In the 4 hours left in your day, you've got to pay bills, do the social media shit we all are hooked on, watch game of thrones, read the news or whatever. Aside from the social media stuff, this isn't any different now than it was in my 20's back in the 90's. In fact, some things take a little less time than they did. I pay my bills online. Back then I had to take my utility payments to the companies.

The key, I think is to learn to combine time usage. Do your social media stuff when you're in the bathroom. Do your homework while you're eating. Fold laundry when you're watching GOT or whatever. You get the picture.

Don't worry about the job so much. You're going to always have to work, the time used will be the same whether you love the job or just tolerate it.

Time is the most valuable resource we have. We all get a finite amount of it, none of us knows exactly how much we've been given and we can never get it back.

Perhaps you’re looking at it too difficult.

168 hours is one week.

40 hours at work = 118 left

7 hours at gym = 111 left

56 hours for sleep = 55 left

55 free hours a week

or 7.8 free hours a day.

8 hours of work is usually the average amount of hours per day.

I truly don't understand how this has so many upvotes.

Most full time jobs are 37.5 hours a week. How do you NOT have time to live your personal life? I go to the gym every morning before work, get home within 20 minutes after I leave the office at 430-5pm, then have another 6-7 hours every day to do whatever I want.

Grabbing groceries on the way takes maybe 20 minutes, and cooking, if I feel like it, takes another 20-30 tops. Assuming I had to do both of those things every evening, that still leaves 5-6 hours a night, plus the entire weekend...

Honestly, when people are always telling me they are literally too busy to do anything, I seriously question their time management skills.

I get that if you also have to spend a tonne of time studying and don't actually get free time on your "weekends" then you might be frustrated, but seriously, the idea that it's impossible to make time for you self (especially once you don't have school anymore) sounds completely laughable to me.

Even when I was working a full time and a part time job, it's not like I never had an evening off to live my life, and still, on the weekends I had a lot of room.

I don't know what it is about this post and the comments in it, but it actually pisses me off that people believe this nonsense. Maybe if you commute for 2 hours each way every day I could see it, but in that case you need to plan your life better. Everyone else here needs to learn how to manage their time way better and not come up with so many excuses to never MAKE time for the people in their lives.

Theres a reason why they say to do what you are passionate about no matter the salary

It’s pretty tough, I’m all for a 40 hour work week, but I would love it if it were 4 days a week instead of 5.

You don't. It's a pretty bleak and sad existence.

This is kind of how life is, if that's how you want to think about it. You'll always have to work to afford the luxury of doing things you want, but work/routine doesn't have to be the end all be all. Time is finite, so you have to make an intentional effort to use it how you want. Work is 40ish hours a week, and there are 168 hours in a week. Even assuming you sleep 8 hours a day, you still have 70ish hours a week to spend doing whatever you want each and every week. You just can't waste time.

Personally, I work about 50 hours a week, have five kids, a dog, and I still have the time to do just about everything I would want to. We travel as a family, I still play video games, I have an 11x11 garden, and I have time to pick up new hobbies like DND. Time is all about how you use it. Don't spend time on anything that isn't a necessity or that you don't enjoy and it'll never be wasted.

I work full time, 3 12 hour shifts a week and go to school full time also. I have a husband and a child (who's 12 and thank god is pretty independent.....has to be) There are times when I struggle to fit in time to wash the laundry or do the dishes. I just say it will all be there tomorrow .... I can't worry and stress about it. As for friends...what are those?

You don’t. Welcome to life. Life sucks and then you die. You’ll pay bills, pay taxes and you will pay for everything else just so you can work and you can get to work as well.

Effective scheduling, time management, carving out time for your personal interests, creating/meeting both care and personal goals, leaving work at work and finding a job you enjoy so you harmonize and unify your self concept (this helps prevent a heaven/hell perspective between home and work). Finding a healthy, rewarding, and fulfilling balance is key to self actualization and life satisfaction.

(Obligatory disclaimer: I’m on mobile so formatting may not be the best)

Everyone always asks me how I do it. I work in the healthcare field full time, I go to school full time, I have two kids (2, 5) and I am married. If I’m being completely honest, the reason why I am able to do what I do and still have a ā€œlifeā€ is because I have an amazing, supportive partner.

I work early and come home late but my schedule could be inconsistent, which means that sometimes I could come home just before the sun sets or I could get home after midnight, depending on emergencies. When I get home from work, my husband already made dinner, packed my lunch for the next day, got the kids cleaned up and ready for bed, and tidied up the house. Because of my schedule, I have more days off, but I do go to school. When I’m home from school I do the cooking, cleaning, taking care of the kiddos, and catching up on hw. Luckily we both have weekends off! We are very big on family time and usually have fun things planned every weekend (beach, science center, etc.)

Not gonna lie though, this life can be VERY overwhelming and some days I question why I do what I do and just want to give up altogether. I do have really bad anxiety and I can slip into depression very easily. My husband understands this and encourages mental health days as much as possible. He encourages me to go out whether it’s to grab a drink with my girls, get a massage, go for a run, etc while he stays home with the kiddos. We also make it a point to have date night at least twice a month.

With all that being said, I love my life and wouldn’t trade it for anything.

I work 8-4 M-F.

I wake up at 4:50, workout until 7. Towards the end of my workout I either walk on the treadmill or bike for 30 minutes and read about 20-30 pages of the book I’m reading.

Eat breakfast/get ready from 7-8.

Drive to work and work 8-3-3:30. Come home.

Read or play some video games while I wait for my gf to get home at 4:30.

When she gets home we either clean, go out and do some errands, chill or go for a walk around the zoo that’s close to our place.

Then we have dinner and by 7pm she has 2 hours to do homework or watch Netflix and I have 2 hours to play video games, work on my next YouTube video, or read.

I feel like I have an abundance of time.

I got the same problem. But for me its even worse. I finished college in germany and did 3 years working so you get a good job title in germany if you work for 2$ per hour for 3 years But after that i looked up there was no good jobs so i was like lets study to get a good job And now i work full time with really really bad jobs to finance my university stuff. So i do a worse job than before with less money and my goal was to improve Now i m stuck in university i m finished to 99% i just need to wirte 1 more stuff but everytime (1 week a year where you can ask) to write that stuff they tell me they are already full (its random) so i m unkucky for years now because i never get this spot to finish After that i could get a better job but now i struggle for nothing. My job is so bad i get a headache every day when i m at work. My back hurts so much fron it i cant sleep because of the pain and headache. I cant do sports because of the pain. I cant do anything because of it. And i have already so less time. I n germany u get free money if you dont work. Sonif i would stop working i would have more money. But you are not allowed to study while getting this money. So i have to do it untill i get this uni stuff

Don't have children. That really throws time management out the window :)

ITT: Wageslaves

I used to be in the same situation as you. That's just how it is when you're in school, but I hope you're getting a degree in something you enjoy. I can say now that after five years of busting my ass in the industry I chose that I am finally working a regular Monday to Friday, 40 hour a week job that I love and pays well, so the time I spend at work isn't all bad and I am satisfied with my time off.

However, it did take FIVE YEARS after graduating college to get here and during that time I was laid off twice and had to go back to serving in restaurants to support myself, even after I got full-time employment again I was working Saturday shifts to make up for the credit card debt that I had created while unemployed, so it wasn't easy. But it was worth it.

I think sometimes people underestimate what it takes to get to that point. You don't just graduate and find a job in a career you like and it all works out. I work in website development and literally could not stand sitting in an office for one more day, at my last "normal" job. I saved money for a year, quit, went freelance, built up a good portfolio (while spending no money and busting my ass 24/7 making connections and doing cheap work), and turned that into a full time webdev job working from home now. My days are 9-5 and generally I love it. I wake up with creative challenges ahead of me every day that I enjoy working on. Have only had a few rough patches of ridiculous deadlines.

Compared to most of my family and friends, I've worked 10 times as hard to get here. Most people I know just sit around miserable and complain about their jobs constantly. I didn't have a family when I did all my freelance work, so I understand it's different for others who do have a spouse/kids. But like you, I spend probably 5 years struggling nonstop because I knew what I wanted to achieve. Most people just aren't willing to put in that work. I think I lived off bread and water for most of those 5 years, and that's not that much of an exaggeration.

Good for you.

It's all about sacrifices. For me I sacrificed my Saturday nights for almost a year to continue living the lifestyle I wanted while paying off debt. Sounds like you sacrificed a decent meal for many years lol.

Make sacrifices you can live with and stay focused on the light at the end of that tunnel, no matter how long. You'll get there.

Shit, and I thought I was busy.... Basically there's a difference between having a life with a full time job and having a life with a full time job and going to school, even just part time. Once you graduate and find an 8-5 job you'll have more time in the evenings on weekdays, but if/when you have kids you're going to lose much of that time again. That's what that crappy song about working for the weekend was all about.

Welcome to 'modern' society. We may be rather intelligent, but we're awful stupid. Greed plays too big a role in our western society, and we let it dictate our entire lives. We're all born into indentured servitude owing our very existence to the economy/society that we live in. Hopefully one day that will change, or global warming will wipe out 5 or 6 billion of us and things can go back to something a bit more harmonious with nature and our need for downtime.

I often see folks on reddit posting amazing artwork, cool contraptions, etc. full time job, 2 kids, no chance I can find time to do anything fun like these projects.....

I didn't study and went out instead. Also skipped homework if it wasn't worth enough of my grade, or half-assed things. I worked part-time through school, had a few different jobs, aimed for about 20-25 hours/week. I went to school full-time, 5 classes/semester and some summer classes to make up some time. I was good at taking tests, which really saved me, as well as attending every class and having high retention. GPA suffered a bit in the later years. I wouldn't recommend doing this, it was just my personal path. With my background, attitude, personality, etc. I had 4 internships completed by the time I graduated recently and had a job lined up. You have to find a balance and set priorities. I knew what I needed to do to set myself up for a job and did that. There's a bit of luck mixed in there as well, but you gotta figure what you want ansttendingnd where you want to spend your time.

Too busy for Christmas and other holidays imagine that.

Minimizing that 2hr to get to work alone would give you time to do something everyday. Finding work close is a huge benefit. Being busy is good. You are accomplishing things.

Ok, here’s the catch:

Shit at work, get paid for it, don’t go home to poop, it’s too expensive.

2 hours to wake up and get to a job is pretty awful... if your commute is really that far, find a new minimum-wage job closer to home. Should be able to save you a whole 5 HOURS a week at least, which is pretty significant

I think a lot of it is the ā€˜when’ you work. When I worked 11-7:30 shift I wasn’t able to have as much as a life as now that I work 7-3:30. It just depends on when you work and when want to live. I don’t like staying out late and going to the bar. If I did the other shift would have been better.

My mans works HVAC 40 hours a week. He didn’t have time to do stuff in college but he grew up and got over it. When I asked him why he didn’t take more time to do the stuff he wanted he told me ā€œSuffer now, relax laterā€. He makes more than me (I’ve never asked his annual earnings) mostly because of the degrees and 3 certificates he got, because he was diligent in college.

Then again, my mans never had any friends besides me and didn’t have any family so he was fairly free.

This is why I’m taking the summer off. I work 30 hrs/wk at a job that I’m starting to resent and I decided on a career change. Like you I’m either working or at school, and the only day off I have, im spending with my bf. This isn’t a bad thing but I’m an introvert and sometimes I need time to myself. When I see my friends and family going to all these cool places—my cousin is in Guam and it looks so beautiful from the pics she’s posted on IG, and my other cousin is going to Europe and shit—it makes me feel jealous. Like, I can be boring and responsible and save up for a place of my own or I can travel. I’m studying to be an archaeologist so hopefully I’ll be able to travel anyway but I want to see the world before I get too old, and 30 is right around the corner for me.

Sorry bout all this, but I totally get how you feel.

It is all time management. I am between insane weeks and long stretches of falling asleep at my desk because what I do can be easy for me. I work at one of the tech Giants. You really enjoy your free time when you get it and as an adult, doing nothing is amazing. I'm 45, and I sometimes look around and am grateful for all the years of hard work I put in so I can retire to be lazy and do nothing. Remember you are working for your future. If you cut corners on your retirement plans by partying through your thirties you'll have to work in to your eighties.

use services like grocery pick up which saves me a couple hours also I'd rather work an extra couple hours and have a maid. this saves me a ton of cleaning time and I can use my time elsewhere.

But at the end of the day ..I'm exhausted and trying to get away from this rat race.

This is a problem for me and most of the people I know. If you’re like me you’ll probably spend most of your life with this struggle. I think you just need to let things go sometimes. You decide what is most important and give that priority. Education and work are important, so you make time for it. Socializing is also very important too. If you’re too busy all the time and don’t give yourself any downtime with friends and family you’ll probably burn out. And even if you don’t burn out, who wants waste their life like that? I guess you just try your best to prioritize your life and be open and honest with your teachers, bosses, friends, and family. Hopefully the people in your life understand this and support you. And if they don’t - maybe they’re not worth your very limited time.

School while working is probably playing a big part here. But one thing I would suggest is to try meal prepping. I make most of my meals for the week on Sunday (while I'm doing laundry). Saves a lot of time after work. Especially slow cooker meals. Low effort, large amounts, and in swear anything that goes in comes out tasting great.

Also I'm lazy and have 2 laundry baskets heaping filling clean clothes. Not folding them probably saves me 10 minutes somewhere.

Ask your employeer to cut down to a 4 day week. Either 4x8 or 4x10 hours if you can handle that. Don't keep going like this. You are going to burn out before you even finish your degree. This lifestyle isn't healthy.

Capitalist burnout

They don't.

It's why obesity is exploding, more people spend the night at home watching tv and we're addicted to our phones.

I live and die by Outlook. Between job, my kid and my husband, I cannot function without it. I can usually find an hour here and there for myself, during the week. But everything from laundry to paying bills is entered into it.

Have a routine, prioritize what’s important to you. Unfortunately working is a necessary evil to have the means to invest in your wants. Think of it like this, you can barter your way from a piece of candy to a million bucks if you play your cards right. It’s the same with work. You use your knowledge and experience to constantly improve and raise your value until you get to a point where maintaining a certain quality of life is easier and takes less work because of how much you’ve grown through life.
It doesn’t get easier, just more manageable.

If you wish to have a cynical laugh abou the state of this system, allow me to plug /r/ABoringDystopia and /r/LateStageCapitalism!

I just started working in a warehouse two weeks ago. I work 45 hours a week with a rotating schedule (five days on, three days off). The first off day you're "on call" so you could potentially work close to 60 hours in a week. How in the hell does anyone have time for a normal life. I get home and I'm so exhausted I usually eat something then fall asleep on the couch watching TV with my wife.

[removed]

Considering the high turnover rate they have, I believe you. But for right now this is a way to pay my bills. Once I get caught up on everything, I will be looking elsewhere. The work itself isn't that bad, but incredibly boring.

I was in the same boat, work 5 days, school the other 2. I was just so fed up with it I finally just cut down to part time for the foreseeable future. Im barely affording my bills but I don’t live at my work anymore.

Please, for the love of your own well being look into financial independence and early retirement. I recommend ready all of Mr money mustache blog posts. Be frugal, invest, make long term decisions and don't grind your whole life away because that's what everyone is doing around you. There is a better way.

For example, instead of renting or owning your own single family money pit, buy a 3 or 4 family with a cheap FHA loan, live in one of the apartments and collect rent from the others. Or simple invest your money in vtsx which is a total stock market index fund and get rich slowly. Things don't have to be grinding all the time.

Once I started full time work, I swiftly learned that weekends were sacred. It's strange at first, but your free time ends up gravitating to the end of the week.

Honestly, they don't. My mom worked full time when I was in high school and she was in nursing school full time. Wake up - work - home work - sleep everyday for almost four years. If you're really gonna commit to something like that, you give up any social life and any free time.

I hated that when I moved out and did work/school full time and decided to only take one class at a time. Freed up a lot of time and now I can use that for other things. Priorities.

I have a steady 9-5 job, 5 days a week. 2 hour round trip commute. I get about 2 hours on weekdays to chill with my friends if I decide to sleep at 11 PM, that sometimes includes groceries and gym. I spend one day on the weekends running errands and the usually the other day to relax.

There are of course weeks where I am more busy, but that my usual schedule. I guess it really depends on how much you want to change after school. Like I used to play a solid 5-6 hours of video games on weekdays and 12 hours is on weekends, but all that changes over time to going out, buying food, running errands for the family. I still go out, just less frequent since my closest friends are currently doing PHD, creating a startup, starting end school, another 9-5 job, so kinda hard for all of us to meet up.

Edit: like gas, laundry and stuff, I usually just do it when I need to. Like waking up 20 mins earlier so I can go get gas, leave laundry in washing machine for the day, and throw it in the dryer when I get back. (I bought my own machine so I can schedule it however I want) I don’t really fold clothes, I just put them on clothing racks and hang them up.

It’s definitely harder to do your own personal things, sometimes when I am too tired I just don’t feel like doing them, then I just focus on the essentials and just try to make time. I praise my hobby bring video games and hiking cuz I can hang out with my friends and play at the same time.

This is something that I’ve been stressing about for a while, especially because I am a PCA which requires a lot of emotional availability which leaves with virtually none when I come home. Half of my job is also cleaning, so the last thing I want to do with my limited days off is clean my house. I don’t even get to do any hobbies, because I also have depression and anxiety and all I ever want to do is sit on my couch and drink beer. I feel like I’m working my life away. šŸ˜ž

Working 40 hours a week is terrible, there are many ways to engineer your life so you don't have to.

It really isn't poissible. People pretend they do stuff in the hopes that it will make them interesting to someone who will be their savior. Most of the people I meet the only think they have time for is beer because it doesn't take any work. It just screws up the next day so you work shittier and end up stuck in the same shitty job for longer.

What most people wont admit - they don't. They willingly sacrifice a part of their lives in order to work 40+ hrs a week.

Make your own business. Buy & sell items on Amazon to suppliment the money you would miss from being a FT worker. As long as you value your happiness over money, I promise you it is worth not taking the 40hrs/week. 1 good sale could save you a whole week of work. Think about all the time saved.

No one will ever pay you for what your time is worth. And if you think they can, you're wrong. Life is not guaranteed to anyone.

Suicide rates are up

Ungrateful af, we are blessed with the oppprtunity to work as little as we can and earn so much. There are plenty of places where they start slaving away at a much younger age for 12+ hrs a day just to eat and live in horrible conditions and i can guarentee they still find time for family. Because thats what life is about, making time for the things that matter most, i work 60 hours a week, i have all the same responsibilities any other grown adult does and i still see my mom twice a week for at least a quick lunch to see how she is and let her know i care, plus im investing plenty into a new relationship with a girl who works full time at a book store, part time at a hospital, AND goes to school for epidemiology. And we see each other ever other day at least and if we dont see each other one day we make time to talk and relax and just enjoy each other. So my point is, be grateful for all things in your life, and make time for the thinga that should matter most its always possible, idc if its only 5 or 10 mins, stop by grandmas and tell hee you live her and just appreciate that you have her around still.

Most people don't have a full time job and school

Simple...they dont. The only people living are people who have retired with a great pension.

I work full time at a job that is physically demanding. When I come home I eat dinner, shower, play a little games, then go to bed. On my days off I’m exhausted from the work week that all I want to do is rest and relax at home.

This is what life is...

I’d recommend not taking two hours to get ready for work. School + work is hard but it will be worth it when you finish.

I work as a EMT. not bad sometimes the OT is crazy. I get 4 days on and 4 days off

I felt the same exact way. My first job out of nursing school needed me five days a week and because any job was hard to find, I took it no questions asked! After a year of doing that I immediately started looking for a part-time nursing gig as I couldn’t stand working 5 days a week... call me a weakling or whatever, but it just wasn’t right for me. I was definitely depressed right out of nursing school. Now I have been at my cure job working 3 days a week for the past 2 years and I’m soooo much happier, the pay cut was worth the quality of life. I do feel for people who have to work 5+ days a week to pay the bills... I probably would of had to go on antidepressants if I kept on working 5 days a week.

Please consider I live in Europe though, but commuting for two hours is insane. After your college you'll have a better pick of where you work and where you will live.

Ideally, you get a cushy job within 30 min of where you live and 20 days of paid vacation, which when combined with national holidays give you way more than 48 hours. Also of course, time management is crucial.

To cut the bs unless you are shit at managing time then yes you can easily have plenty of free time.

Exactly how I’ve been feeling!! Switched my schedule to work 40 hours in 4 days instead of 5, that way I get a 3 day weekend and it has helped a lot

They don't. Anyone that has a "life" has worked it into their vocation or sacrifice something(family time, sleep, friends) most adult men I know fall into 2 categories. 1 loves to hang with buddies during little free time. 2. Does some hobby. It seems that at least the boomer generation decided to sacrifice friends most commonly. Soooooo yeah it's hard but if you work hard enough you might die early so the whole having a life thing will pass.

Birth is a curse, existence is a prison

I make free time for myself by making sacrifices. I, too, would have ZERO free time if I stuck by my strict schedule of what I'm supposed to do and when I'm supposed to do it. But that's what we call "Living to work, not working to live." So I postpone or cancel things to make room for free time. I do the dishes every other day instead of every day. I do 3 loads of laundry once a week, instead of 1 load 3 times a week. I go to bed later than I should once or twice a week so I can catch up on a show or watch a movie. Take a 2 hour lunch at work occasionally so I can stroll through a park instead of just hitting a drive-thru.

The point is, everyone struggles to find free time, but the people who are happiest are the ones who know which things they can sacrifice doing (and when) in order to get some free time.

Edit: I'm a single dad and have had my career for 16 years. Finding free time is easier now than it was 16 years ago. You'll figure it out.

Eventually you'll be done with school, right? That will do two things (assuming you earn your degree):

1) Free up significant time and

2) Open up better job prospects.

Based on your comment, it sounds like you are quite young. Many people don't hit their groove until their 50s. Not saying this will happen to you, but my point is you have plenty of time to figure this out.

It also sounds like you could use a vacation, but right now you need to keep busting out your schoolwork and the hours at your job. You're young, so you should have for all this shit, but it sounds like it's taking a toll on you mentally a little bit.

Keep working hard now. It will pay off when you get your degree and are able to get a better job. Then you'll get things like paid days off, a regular schedule, and a fatter paycheck.

Until then, see what you can to steal some time to yourself and chill. Meditate. Go find a pretty spot in a park or in nature and just sit there and slowly breath the fresh air. Try to get a run or a nap in when you can. Get your headspace together.

Sometimes opportunities are missed because they come disguised as hard work. You busting out like you're doing right now will pay off, if you're able to get your head right and stay on the right path.

You don’t. Sad but true. You live for the weekends. Welcome to America.

:0 I see that you're literally me

Without school you have a lot more time. I used to work 8am-5pm and have class. But school ends, I got a 7am-3:30pm schedule now, and I have actual income. I don't see my parents as much, but I have kids, so my parents come to me, fortunately they live within a few miles of us, so it's not a big issue. I go to the gym before work, at 4:30am 4 times a week. So when I get home I can maximize my availability to my family. Having more money helps, sometimes money buys time. I used to spend 4 hours a weekend mowing and cleaning the yard, pool, etc. Now I pay $120 a month and a service handles that. That $120 is trivial in a 2 income household, but me being around 4 more hours has a big impact on my lifestyle. I have time, energy, and am able to do more. Things like that just improve over time if you play your cards right. I often am doing things like managing my budget, or checking finances while the landscapers do their thing, so I'm not only buying time, I'm improving my situation with that time I bought. As years of this sort of behavior pass, you'll start to notice and maximize ways to manage your time better. It's one of those things you only learn with age, unless you're parents were great examples of time management, mine were not.

They don't, that's why I work for myself. The internet makes it easier than ever before. Don't be a slave, folks. It's a choice.

Sooooo....

I work full time and go to school full time.

I also have a great social life and go out quite a bit.

The truth is, the only way I'm able to do not is completely abandon the amount of sleep I get.

I'm also single, so I guess that frees up my alone time.

Anyways, good luck!

It’s a tough when you work for your family, but then realize that with that comes less time to actually spend WITH your family.

It is exciting, though, to see certain states and countries adopting a 4 day work week. I feel like even that one extra day would be a huge help in balancing life.

Shift works not so bad. Pros.and cons but i love days off in the week and always atleast 5 or 6 hours in the am or pm. IMO it's the 9-5 that cripples you.

I think because you have school on weekends you’re technically not in that ā€œadult lifeā€ yet. I work full time and I need my weekends, I honestly don’t know how you do it. I did find moving closer to my work helped- it takes me 25min now instead of an hour, as well as I stopped putting make up on daily (saves an hour, and my skin is healthier). Also if you have one night free trying doing a bulk meal prep so you don’t have to cook/make lunches for the rest of the week. Here is what I made this week in case it helps you- crockpot green split pea soup, chicken pesto sandwiches, a pasta sauce, Asian tuna wraps. All super cheap (Pinterest for recipes). I hope once you’re done school things ease up a bit for you. Good luck!

It’s a work/home life balance! You don’t need to clean the whole day or every day your off. Catch up on laundry yes but again doesn’t take forever. You seem to have quite the commute. And if you want to do it you make the time and do it. Arrange your schedule around clean different times or choose a day to vacuum dust and another day to wipe scrub clean then go out at night or morning. I don’t know I seem to have enough down time to do what I’d like and relax on weekends :) but I agree weekends aren’t always long enough. Ps I do remember the times that I felt like I was running around with my head cut off just to go to school and make ends meat! But there will come a phase in your life where your no longer running around with your head cut off and live a more comfortable life (I don’t mean money wise)

Everyone is different. Five years ago, my wife and I both worked because we had to. Chores and errands were always done on the weekends. It was hard to fit fun stuff in. Now, we live on single income and my wife stays at home. She works her ass off at home and so we always have weekends free to do whatever we want. It's been an enjoyable trade-off for both of us. My weekdays are still busy though. Up at 4am, do homework and study, get the oldest ready for school at 6:30, take him to school, go to work, come home early evening, eat dinner, then we play and goof off until it's bath, bed, and book routine for the kids. All in all, I have a pretty good work/life balance and wouldn't trade what I have for anything.

Once school is out of the equation it gets a lot easier. I have a work from 10:00 AM - 5:30 PM with about 2 1/2 hours additional commuting Monday - Friday. My girlfriend drops me and picks me up from the train station at 8:22 AM and 6:43 PM, respectively, so we have a bit of time in the morning + the drives to and from the train, we're usually home by 7:30 ish, have dinner and fuck around, watch movies/TV, smoke weed, read, make a target run, etc. Then both are weekends are totally open. She's still in school so she occasionally works on projects on the weekend but that gives me time to do solitary activities like videogames or archery or be a dungeon master. All in all, we're pretty happy with things.

But when I was doing my masters and before we lived together it was rough. Point is, things get better.

You don’t have time? No, you don’t make time.

There are two options, you sacrifice stuff to reach your dreams or your dreams become the sacrifice. It's all about priorities and the will to change things

coffee. even when i worked 10-12 hour shifts 7 days a week i would refuse to go to bed till i did something fun. could just be playing games for a few hours, watching some tv, going out with a couple friends to eat or whatever. i got used to living on 5-6 hours of sleep and getting coffee on my way to work.

The fact that your getting a bachelors and working full time is already a lot. Some jobs you’re able to clock out and check out. School is different you have to dedicate time OUTSIDE of the classroom to study, do homework and possible group work. Once you’re finished with school, there will be some relief.

We don't. Its adulthood. I work 65 hours a week and barely see my family in order to put food on the table. The problem is wages haven't risen with the cost of living.

I'm 30. Most of the people my age doing mass amounts of stuff after work each day are either drinking 10 coffees a day, on adderall or ripping cocaine. There's always room for the gym or walking the dog or having a hobby but in my experience, if your jamming all of them into the same day and going out for happy hour 3-4 times a week then I'm def gonna look at you and think you're on adderall

Live near friends and SO, hang out near where you all live. and have choir stuff like supermarkets, dry cleaners, laundramats and gym and work nearby. With all these you can have a full time job and a life.

I don't live

As someone who went from being in college for 5 years while working at the same time. You actually are going to have A LOT more free time once you start working exclusively. No homework, or studying outside of the office. That ladder part depends on your line of work of course. But I noticed after graduation that while working full time I had a lot more free time

I guess it really depends on what you mean by 'living'. You say that you don't have time to live with a full time job, but you're going to school, studying, working, driving, etc. Do these things fulfill you or make you happy in any kind of meaningful way? Do you listen to podcasts or audiobooks while getting ready or commuting that you enjoy? Do you like your classes, are you learning things that interest you? I would argue that you are living, and the busier you are the more living you're doing. What would you do with your time if you had more of it that you aren't doing now?

I thought very similarly at first when I started my masters program. I work full time, have an almost three year old, volunteer on weekends, and try to fit other things in my week as well. I really felt like I needed more time. But the more free time I have, the more I fill it up with things that don't really matter. Lots of reddit, watching youtube videos, wasting time. The busier I am and the more I fill up my weeks the more I feel like I'm really living.

When you get paid to do something you enjoy, it changes everything. The trick is to not get suckered in to spending your working life doing something you don't enjoy. That has never been easier.

It’s all about time management

I mean when I'm not in school/off track I work 60 hours a week and still have plenty of time to do what I love. But my hobbies are fishin, trail ridin, gamin, readin, and playin my banjo. I dont ever feel pressed for time or like I'm havin to give stuff up. I get up at 5, and work from 7am to 5pm sometimes later.

Im in the minority when I say this but maybe manage your time better and learn to prioritise? If you're job is too demanding or stressful in relative to the pay, find a new one. Life is too short to work a job that'll cause long term health issues

Wtf...

no theres not time! welcome to the real life its a grind even as im writting this im looking over my shoulder to make sure my masters arent around to see me slacking off or breathing free air, you didnt choose it but it chose you!

Honestly, I LOVE my job. I love waking up for it, I love every moment I spend working there and I’m more than willing to spend from 9 AM until 9 PM if necessary. Genetic and biochemical engineering is cool

Honestly I feel like I have much more time to do things now that I work full time and am not in school anymore. For a large portion of college I worked 32 hours a week on top of being a full time student, so I had literally no time to do anything fun unless I was willing to lose sleep or miss homework over it. Now all I need to do is get through the work day, then I can do whatever I want

Work and pay bills till you die šŸ˜•

I stay up late and don't get much sleep.

It's a sacrifice I'm willing to make for myself.

Stop cooking and cleaning and sleeping

This is a problem with modern life. I"m older than you, but here's how I handle it:

-I live less than one mile from work. Basically no commute. I am a dude so I don't wear makeup.

-I work for myself/ have my own business, so my hours are flexible

-I'm not in school, just working

In time most people find a balance, but it is hard.

Ive just given up at this point, I made friends with my coworkers so I get what little social interaction I need from them, then when I get home I sleep or smoke pot. I'm not in college anymore so that gave me some free time, but I still have a habit of being a hermit when I don't have work.

[deleted]

Just curious but what is your commute like? I find that I’m actually gone 3 days out of the week 11 hours due to my job and my commute! Do you live close by?

[deleted]

Lol sounds like a dream I have family that is just close enough (45 min one way) to visit often, plus I commute 45 min to an hour one way every day! It takes up so much time it’s ridiculous, sometimes I tell my SO I just want people to leave me alone!

By putting minimal effort into everything I do.

40 hours a week is pretty generous, 40-44 hours are more likely

It’s school. You spend your free time studying, doing assessments and feeling guilty that you should be studying right now during your free time. I’m studying now but I’ve also worked full time without school before. It’s a world of a difference. Just hang in there until school is finished and you’ll feel great afterwards.

Cut down on time getting ready for work and most people dont have school and a full time job also try eating and sleeping better and exercise you will have more energy in free time

Why the fuck do I relate to this? I'm on High School!

It did my head in do now I work very little, just enough to put food on the table and pay for the roof over my head, loads of free time, stress free and can sink myself in my hobbies.

I used to be like this but then I got a job that was a bit more flexible with hours. I now start work at 6.30 and am home by 3ish so I have 7 hours to live my life before bed.

When I was working full time (35 to 40 hours a week) and going to school it was really hard to balance work/life/school balance. How I did it was I was very organized with my time and was efficient with the time I gave myself (I would literally set a timer to study, workout, make dinner etc). I found that if I set short term goals each day (read pages 10-25) and each week (finish Chapter 4-8 and complete study guide) regarding completing assignments or whatever I stayed focused. If I met those goals I would reward myself with free time for myself or to visit family or hang out with friends. Really it is all about using the time you do have well. Make a daily to do list (I still use Google keep for mine). Remember you can only sustain a go, go, go lifestyle for so long, sometimes you need a break! Good luck! I've been out of school for a year now, it is totally worth the time commitment now!

I just play video games, drink beer, occasionally play my guitar and play with my dog. Very productive and healthy life style I know. Still can't figure out why I'm single lol I know why. It's just how it is though. I work a lot and that's what I spend my free time doing. It's really hard meeting new people after the education and training phase. Sometimes I really wish a big bag of money would just fall through my roof.

Add a newborn with both parents working 40-50 hours a week. I find I embrace the grind now. Running on 5-6 hours of sleep a day you get used to it. You can say I’ve become more spontaneous, squeezing in rounds of golf and pick up ball whenever the mother in law can help. Time flies but life is better than ever. Great thread, really hit home I tried to read as many comments as I could

I struggle with this every day and am going through a break up directly related to this. I just want to be single now because having to fit in with another person’s expectations is just a bridge too far after all the other demands of my life. It’s really really hard.

I work 12-hour shifts, so full time work for me is only 3 days a week. Having 4 days off in a row is awesome

I think it’s a lot easier when school isn’t an issue. Classes, studying, and a lot of stress are automatically gone once classes are over. If you just upkeep the house a little bit each day, then that doesn’t take up as much time.

Then you have a lot of time for other things. This is of course, as long as you aren’t miserable from work. I’ve had a job where I hated it and it made me feel like I had no time to be happy. It took so long to get in a better mood after work and on my off days I was still dreading work.

Not having that stress opens up a lot of time for fun things.

dont have kids OP. those 48 hours on the weekend that we all cherish go bye bye, and your free weekend is essentially babysitting lol.

When you're working JUST 40 hours a week, its pretty simple. A partner (and no kids!!!) Also helps an insane ammount. I wake at 5-5:30 work 7-3:30 home by 4:30, shower, do some dishes or laundry and its 5:30 or so...

So 5:30-9/10 = whatever I feel like.

Also, if you avoid your phone, youll find you suddenly have a tonne of time to do things you want to.

As an owner of a large Cannabis company, all I can say is you make time for the things that matter. I regularly work 80-90 hours a week. However, despite having incredibly limited time to spend with my fiance and pups there is always time for the things that you are passionate about.

I think that's the key. Passion.

When you love doing something be it work, a hobby, or even just being around someone I have found that the time is always there. Certainly there is never enough of it. But I'm passionate about my work and yet I still make sure to walk the dogs, race a car every now and then, as well as cooking dinner for the lovely woman most nights.

Otherwise what's the point?

I work a 40 hr a week job, I commute 10 min each way to work, I can't wear makeup or hairspray and I have flexibility in my hours. I make enough money where I don't need a roommate and so I only need to clean up after myself. My hobby is running so I don't have much in expenses outside of general living. I support some form of universal basic income so that people can have time to be creative without having to work 80 hour weeks to get ahead.

There are 168 hours in a week. Track your time. By the half hour. For the average person 40 hours of work between 45-56 hours of sleep. This leaves almost 60 hours of time. You add in your commute and studying fine lets say that knocks it down to 35 or 30 hours remaining.. That leaves plenty of time for the exploration of hobbies, the enrichment of your life through social interaction.

I thought like you, I have a full time job, I'm there 45 hours a week, I spend a minimum of 8.5 hours in the car a week, I'm in grad school working on a masters in accountancy. And after several weeks of tracking my time I found that I was spending all this time filling my time with easy entertainment. Oh I have five minutes here let's scroll through reddit. Well if you do that 10 times a day that's almost an hour wasted. Just do something that's actually fulfilling.

You just have to make time for what matters to you.

-Full time worker, with kids

On weekdays I have about 4 hours to do things and weekends free. You learn to prioritize activites and better time management.

I work five and a one half days a week.

Sometimes well over 60 hours,

I go to the gym every day after work

Have many hobbies and interests

Dine out and socialize several days a week.

You make time.

You don't, that's the whole point of slavery.

Just remember all these responsibilities are ones you took on. If you want free time then make free time.

Idk how this isn't obvious, you're in school and work full time, that's it right there. Once you're done with school it will be better.

Including commute, I'm gone from home for 12 hours a day, and my workday is longer than most. Sure, I don't have as much time as I did when I was a kid but that's life. I still get to play Xbox, spend time with my wife, do house work, etc.

If anything it is just shorter periods of time. Growing up being able to play Xbox for an hour was nothing, now having time for an hour of video games is a lot. Things change

School and work at same time will be the busiest you will be in your life. When you’re just working you have your evenings to yourself. You’re no longer writing papers, doing assignments, studying, etc.

Having young kids is the only time in my life that rivaled how busy I was during university.

In this world of ours full of self-love and self-gratification my answer may not come off as very popular: It shouldn't only be about you. Once you complete your education and settle into a full time job; find a partner to spend the rest of your life with. Have children. Your purpose in life then is to work and provide for your significant other and your children. You'll go home everyday excited to be with them and realize your purpose is to fulfill the needs of your loved ones. Rinse and repeat for a fulfilling life, plan for future retirement, stay healthy. And that is adult life.

You sacrifice your first 5-8 years to build your experience and the. Work hard to find a job/owners/managers that value work/life. I was lucky enough to find a great job and bosses that are like this and it’s made a world of difference.

It’s not always about how much money you make or prestigious of a job you have, but at some point you decide your life is more valuable than the job you have and take $85k/yr with awesome life balance vs $110k/yr that sucks your soul.

Move to Europe

Welcome to the American Dream! Isn’t this what everyone wants!? Because id rather die than being a European commie socialist with all that parental leave and paid vacation.

Hah, try 70 hours a week

I've been thinking about this for years. I'm the kind of person who needs 8-9 hours of sleep to function at my best AND I'm a night owl naturally so I'm constantly fighting against my biological clock. I imagine this is how others feel when they have to work evening or night shifts...they are going against what their body needs. I look around me and see all these relatively successful people working full-time jobs, raising kids, hanging out with friends and family, working on hobbies, and somehow still getting their workouts in. HOW??? I work my regular job and come home exhausted from having to deal with so many people all day. I reduced my commute from 1.5 hours to 30 min and it still feels like I don't have enough time to do more than just exist.

I currently work a rather soul crushing job. It started as a great opportunity and devolved into something that still offers some growth (I’ve continued to get significant raises within a year) but the work itself is hollow. I understand the dread that ensues when you can watch yourself getting overweight, staring at a screen and dreaming of being outside the office 5 days a week. It’s terrible and honestly I don’t think it’s sustainable for most people. That being said, most people in unfulfilling jobs are there for various reason. The one constant is money though. We all have a certain lifestyle we want to live and have certain financial obligations. These obligations and lifestyles range the gamut and often times the obligations one may have are not self created.

I am currently working on various ideas on why I am still at my job and beyond the obvious... money, I like to tell myself that the current position I am in is temporary and actually integral step in achieving a larger goal. Unfulfilling work is just that, work. It’s work and if the work you are doing is for a larger goal it makes more sense.

Being in college it was always slightly easier to navigate the dread because college had a start and end point (the length of that duration can change) but the goal is to graduate. After graduation the next goal is to get a job right? So people land a job and often times find themselves stuck because there is no set amount of work or time you can really put in to reach the end. It may never end. That is the life not pursued and for many people that is the case. I think that a lot of people become content with their position and hope for growth in their company or a raise or what ever it may be. If your current work is not a career and does not at the very least provide with you with some semblance of success and the opportunity to grow you need to stay focused on how to change that.

Changing your current situation in life inherently hard because you have most likely become rather skilled at jumping through hoops in a race. Well this race never ends and the older you get there are just simply so many more things that can fill up a day.

If what you are doing is a step towards something else your doing the right thing. Complacency in life and being content is false trust in security and that you have figured this while life thing out. Life is going to smack the most content and secure person in the world right in the face and they too will have to make a change. It’s constant.

I work 35 hours a week, commute is 20 min, got every friday afternoon off. I make a relatively good money meaning I can buy all the shit I want and got 5 weeks holiday a year paid. I am not educated as I stop schools at 15 to learn a trade.

They sleep 4hrs a night.

I work about 50 hours a week. Sometimes more if people call in sick. (I’m a grocery department manager)

I never feel like I have enough time. I basically work, eat, sleep, spent time with wife, help with house care, and squeeze in just a bit of time for hobby’s and interests. Not in that order though lol.

I hardly ever hang out with friends because I’m normally tired from working or just spending time with the wife at home. Oh, I also try and visit my mom at least once a week.

I long for the days of being young and having hours and hours to do whatever I want. I’ve slowly accepted that this is being an adult though and until I’m retired it will probably never change lmao

Easy, I don’t!

Very few people do. Great argument for either 4 day work week or just slashing standard workweek to 32 hours.

I feel the same way. At work 9 hours with a 1 hour lunch. Go straight from work to the gym 4x per week. I don't get home until 7ish. If i want 8 hours of sleep, I have to be in bed by 10:30pm.

The gym is almost like work to me, even though I enjoy it. I only go to maintain my body. I don't count it as a hobby. It's as necessary as work. So I get 3 hours and 30 minutes - great right?

Except my wife and I have no dishwasher. So there are an hours worth of dishes almost daily depending on if we eat out. That cuts it to 2 hours and 30 minutes. A shower at night, cut 10 minutes off that. Eating dinner, cut 15 mins off of that. Water the bushes. 10 minutes off that. So I have almost 2 hours to actually enjoy my day and do what I'd like. Maybe a movie. But by that point I'm dead tired anyway.

The weekends I get to mow the lawn, budget, do whatever family gathering or whatever thing I have to do that's going to eat up a full day. Guess that's life.

I remember reading once on reddit, think of the end of your work day, as the start of your personal day!!

Plus, I love my job so there’s that.

I'm with you, fren. Gonna be in school for the next 8-10years; and I had a later start from taking a 4 year hiatus. I'm still in the beginning stages, just taking about 12 hours a semester but its going to get even worse down the road. And I work in a restaurant so I have to work weekend brunches bc that's where the greatest opportunity for money is. Honestly, I just keep telling myself that I'm making necessary sacrifices now for "success" and a better life for myself in the future. It truly is disheartening, but you're definitely not alone. You gotta make time for the little happy moments. gl:))

The more you do, the more time you have.

At least that's what I find, up to a point, of course.

When I had maybe 20 hours a week of uni and the rest was free time, I barely got anything done - struggled to keep up with laundry, do any exercise, see people.

Somehow, I started a full time job, and the stuff that was previously falling by the wayside slightly was... exactly the same. No worse off.

Then the more I add, it still stays the same. I struggle to get it done, but only because I put it off as much as I can.

Doing more in my day makes me more productive in my free time. Stuff that needs to get done, gets done; the rest waits until it's urgent, then the urgency spurs me to push it to the top of my to-do list and sort that out. If I make plans to see friends, the rest of what I need to do that weekend falls into place around it. I re-arrange the big stuff (e.g. needing to go shopping during the shop's opening hours), and squeeze the small stuff around it.

Most of all, my stamina improves. I always thought I'd be more tired if I started doing more things - more chores, more exercise, more hobbies and seeing friends. Surprisingly, it's completely the opposite. The more I push myself, the more invigorated I am in the long term. (And by the way, it feels awesome!)

It sounds like you're alright doing a lot/enough. Once you finish school, you'll have it easier! Keep trying to do things like chores on the weekdays; then you'll have the entire weekend free to do whatever you want.

Also, bank holiday and vacation leave are really invaluable. Don't forget about those; they make life a lot better.

Welcome to life. If someone said it would be fair, you were lied to. Life is hard work, and it would be even harder if workers had to support more loafers that complain like you.

[removed]

You must therefore think getting food and staying out the rain is trivially easy. No use then worrying about anyone not finding food since it’s so easy.

Effective time management. Plan things. Wake up an hour earlier. Do laundry or go the gym then. That will open up opportunities at night and on weekends to do activities.

Oh something I know about! sleep deprivation

I worked on an ambulance and now I work in an ER. I work 12 hour shifts and for me full time is 3 days a week. It's not always 3 consecutive days, but I still have a lot of free time. I'll be starting pre-med soon hopefully, so I'll have a little less free time. Working M-F 9-5 sucks. You don't have to be a desk jockey. Learn a trade. Be an electrician or a plumber and work longer hours, but have more free time. It's a trade off, but you choose what you prefer.

You don’t ..

I worked a couple of part-time jobs around my college schedule. I never had free time until I got to the point where I could buy a home and have everything I need (washer + dryer, garage, workbench + tools) in my mid 30s. When I was renting after college I still didn't have time (parking situation, laundry, a lot of temporary items I had to keep rebuying due to limited space).

Once you start actually owning things and building around a life you can actually plan from day to day, you start getting some free time. Oh man, once you actually owning things, you can start saving more money as well. In this life, things become cheaper or free the more money you have. It's f'ed up, but I was running up a lot of credit card debt when I was making less to pay for all these tangential things. Now, I actually save money month to month because I have the space and money to buy a few permanent things to take care of those daily tangential things.

I live good now, but I'll never forget how f'ed up it is that I had to spend way more money when i didn't have it as opposed to now. And there are a lot of people that are still living how I used to live.

Find time.

What I don’t get is, how are adults who work full time able to have full on lives with unique hobbies when I can’t even find time to visit my grandma for a day?

There are only 24 hours in a day, most of them are shortchanging something somewhere in their lives in order to do what they do.
It does run on a bell curve, like most things to do with people, and some might be a little more efficient and organized than you, or a little faster, or need a little less rest, but that's not enough to do what all you're doing and have a lot of downtime too without shorting something else.
Remember, a lot of people's facebook pages are really just their highlights reel and they keep most of the blooper reel to themselves.

I work a full time job it's better to start your day early than late I get up at 330 am for work and start at 6 than get out at 230 drive home makes it about 4 when I can start doing things I want to do the only way I get to live a life is having a partner who does half the work while I do the other half

Twenty years ago this month, just after I had started full time work, I was sitting in the bath and had exactly this realization: this is it for the next thirty plus years.

I barely make enough money to live. If I earn a bit more money I can raise a bit of my QoL but I'm still in the same boat. It honestly hurts my soul to see my friends that have wealthy families be able to fuck off every day. Like literally part time job or no job, eating at 5^* restaurants 3x a day, traveling anywhere they want because they can, absolutely no fear or consequences of missing a bill or payment. It's to the point I can't even relate to them.

Nah. Forty hours a week isn’t much. Eight hours a day for work, plus an hour for lunch, an hour for getting ready, an hour for travel, plus eight hours for sleep, leaves you five hours of time for whatever, daily. Even taking another hour out for dinner leaves you four hours for whatever. Not to mention the thirty-two hours over the weekend. Plenty of time if you have the means for whatever hobby it is you want to do.

The bigger issue is those means though. Shrinking middle class wages is, in my opinion much harder to find. So, good luck in that respect. Not to mention vacation time. Again, a larger issue in my opinion.

Its not that hard. All that time you put into school will became either your work time or free time. Time spend on homework can now be spend on family time. Hours in class become hours at work. Those weekends studying for a test can now be weekends with friends.

I work 38 hours a week and have plenty of time left for family and games. Don't worry about it, you'll find your way to spend your time.

Doctors have 80 hour work weeks, stop complaining.

I work from 8 to 2:30. That's how I do it

prob bc you spend 2 hrs getting ready, it literally takes me 30min to shower, brush teeth, and get dressed before work

They really like consumerism, that's what I've observed. At least the people loving and thriving in our late stage capitalist system.

My schedule:

530AM Wake up

6AM leave for work

630AM arrive at work

330PM leave work

4PM get home, immediately take dogs on walk

430 PM - 930 PM I do whatever i want.

Saturday i do whatever

Sunday i do whatever plus 1 hour of grocery shopping and 1 hour of weekly meal prep.

How this is accomplished:

  1. Pro landscapers come every week to take care of the yard.

  2. Maids come every 2 weeks to take care of the house so we dont have to do any intensive cleaning.

  3. Intelligent, "work smarter not harder meal prepping."

  4. Married no kids. Wife on a similar schedule.

  5. Work allows for flexible working hours, which cuts down my commute significantly by avoiding the worst of rush hours.

As an adult I sneer at homeless people, cause I’m jelly.

Well the problem with your situation is that you basically have two full time jobs and a 2 hour commute. Once you are done with school things get a bit easier BUT you should really consider moving closer to your job or start looking for a new one, a 2 hour commute equals 4 more hours you could be doing something else.

[deleted]

Life is not all apple pies and puppy hugs, it's effing hard unless you're born with a silver spoon in your mouth. Also, even when you're finished with school, you will have a million other things that pull you in all directions.

In my late teens and early 20's I was going to uni full-time, while also working full-time and it left me feeling completely wiped out. I'd comeback from work to run to class or be done with the work week on a Friday and go home and do HW. I'd see people around me going out boozing, partying and having fun, and think how do they have time for all of this?

A couple questions to ask yourself:

- where do you want to be in the next 5 years?

- what will it take to get there? are you willing to put in the time and effort?

- what makes you happy? (i.e. reading a good book, spending time with people you love, helping someone who needs it, travel)

Understand your own limits and that you cannot do everything, and that is completely okay. Also, know that as humans we have the privilege to push past and increase our own limits. For things that are important (visiting grandma, spending time with your S/O's parents, etc.), make time or you will look back and regret it.

Regarding weekends and finding time to do the things you want, account for your hours. For example, bulk prep some meals (yes, eating the same thing for a couple days may get annoying, but you can mix it up), plan your clothes out for the week ahead of time (i.e. I have 3 different colored dress shirts for work, one blue, one white, one grey. I have 4 of each of the same shirts and pair them with a choice of navy, grey, or black pants. That way, I don't have to waste time thinking about what i'm going to wear in the morning). Do your grocery shopping/meal prep/apt cleaning while you're doing laundry. The free minutes will slowly add up. Try to give yourself a couple hours on the weekend to veg out (watching a silly tv show, rocking out to music, reading a trashy mag, etc.)

24 hours in a day (the below is complete guesswork for your day):

- 7 hours of sleep

- 9 hours at your job

- 2 hours for commuting

- 1 hour to get ready

- 2 hours for breakfast/lunch/dinner

- 3 hours left (studying, working out, spending time with the S/O, working on self-improvement)

Lastly, when you're able to save up a little bit of money, open an investment account. Future you, will thank current you for financial freedom.

Think about this on Labor Day. Celebrating when we were able to get ā€œ8 hours work, 8 hours recreation, 8 hours sleep.ā€

The problem in today’s world is while their are labor laws, they only cover a company. School IS a job, but is so expensive students have to have a job to afford it. Labor laws don’t cover how undercut the workers can be when it comes to benefits, many people have to work more jobs then ever to survive, let alone thrive. Parenting is not recognized as a job, but we all call it a ā€œfull time jobā€: instead of cherishing and supporting the time parents should have to nurture their children into healthy good adults, we punish them with time docked, promotions withheld and minimal maternity and paternity leaves.

So, we’re all working more hours, or multiple ā€œjobsā€ that technically aren’t jobs...and as a result of that stress, or recreational time and sleep time is drained.

We are out of balance as a society. Keep educating yourself, breathe when you can, recognize and appreciate you don’t have to be perfect at everything everyday and go forth with your knowledge and self care to contribute on ways to bring us all back into focus.

I work full time job that is 5 days a week m-f with a crap load over over time in summer month. Then I work a part time job 5 days a week also. Thursday-monday So I'm working 7 days a week. Then taking an ITclass for a 5 hours on Tuesday. Wednesday I take a gutair lesson.

Having time for my wife and son while studying for the IT class and trying to practice my gutair.

Life's tough but you can do it. Just got to set your goals have a vision on where your going.

When you are losing your hope remember that you can do anything that you want.

School. This too shall pass. Once you’re done with school it’ll free up more time. Also try to find small ways to ā€œredeemā€ time from other activities like maybe don’t worry about makeup so much, that can be pretty time consuming. Now you know why fast food is such a hit in America. Life is go go go and fast food doesn’t require washing dishes or preparing the food. Just grind it out until your done with school and you should see the light at the end of the tunnel.

This was me before I graduated. Had a part time job, full time internship, and was a full time student. I never had time for anything. Now that I've graduated, I dont have to worry about homework and I only have 1 full time job now, M-F, 8-5. I have SO MUCH FREE TIME. I've lost sight of any hobbies I had prior to college. I have like.. 3 friends? Because most ditched me while I was in school - not enough time to hang. Weird how quick things can change up.

  • Wake up earlier than you have to.
  • Eliminate your daily commute.
  • Outsource housekeeping, landscaping, laundry, etc.
  • Delete social media except for business purposes.
  • Cancel cable TV.
  • Meal Prep Sundays.

I work overseas for about 3½ months at a time, and then i come home for 1-2 months and literally do whatever the hell I want. Or my company will pay to fly me anywhere in the world during my leave time. However, I do understand that my current full-time job definitely isn't the norm... Before I just managed my time really well I suppose. When I was in the military it would be hard sometimes (going in at 4am, and getting off at 7pm). But I've always managed somehow

Presumably your studies will pay off once completed in the form of a better paying job (and free weekends). So this sounds like a temporary situation, relatively speaking - requiring some grit and determination to get though it.

Any chance of getting a raise or better paying job, or working just 4 days a week? Appreciate that financially the latter may not be an option.

Weekends and prioritizing hobbies over other, objectively more important activities.

I occasionally run distance races for fun and will take a day off work if required to run a race. I'll delay going to bed if I haven't had the chance to run in a couple days.

The unpopular answer is you might not be as efficient or as organized as you think. Most people have a series of small tasks they do and prioritize daily, and if you want to be the perfect man/woman, chances are you'll need at least 40 hours in a day to execute that. People simply she'd away the unnecessary tasks in their lives to focus primarily on what they want more. Just from your description of getting ready for work, which took two hours, you're very attentive to how you look. A lot of people do get ready for work in about 10-15 minutes: 5 minute shower, a minute brushing your teeth, 1-2 minutes dressing up, 2-3 minute breakfast and they're off. If you want to have actual free time, you'll have to make sacrifices.

Weekdays:

8 hours sleep

8 hours work

8 hours free time

Weekends:

10 hours sleep

14 hours free time

I save over an hour a day that adds to free time just by being insanely fast in the morning. Up at 7:10, out the door by 725

Lol. OP don't even have kids yet....

I don't think having unique hobbies and full-on lives is that common, to be honest. I think a lot of people are wondering exactly what you are wondering. It's so difficult to just stay on top of your day-to-day.

In my opinion, it's a good practice to evaluate everything (and I do mean EVERYTHING) in your life regularly. Think about the following things:

  • Does this make me happy?
  • Am I setting myself up to grow? Improve? Learn?
  • Am I setting myself for failure? Is that going to benefit me in the long run?
  • Are my feelings being properly heard and considered (by both myself and others in my life)?
  • Am I voicing my needs in a healthy way?
  • Am I taking time to balance my responsibilities with the things that inspire and recharge me?
  • Am I comfortable? Am I too comfortable? Am I suffering unnecessarily?
  • Do I have a good mindset about myself and my life? Do I need help with that?

In the past two years, I've really shaken up my life in search of these questions and the people and things (jobs, environments, hobbies, etc.) that answer all these questions the way I need them to be answered. It's ongoing (simply because work is never done while being alive), but it's always helped me to have a check-in process.

I hope this helps!

Generally speaking, you won’t have homework, group projects and exams to work on once your work day is done.

I don't know about other people but I build up flexi time in my job. Once I've worked 7 hours 24 on top of my normal 37 hours per week I can book it as a day off. Or I sometimes finish at 3pm because...why not. Gives me time to focus on me. I can't take more than 2 entire days off during any 4 week period so have short days here and there too. The extra 25 days off a year definitely makes working more tolerable (on top of the 28 annual leave days).

So, I recently got my first real job after college graduation. Its Monday to Friday, 8am to 4:30pm. That's 8 and a half hours of my day at work, plus another hour or so of driving to and fro, so that's about 9 and a half hours total taken by my job 5 days a week. I still get 2 days a week that are completely free to do whatever, where I dont have to think about my job or anything like that. And on days I do work, I still have roughly 4-5 hours or so of free time a day. The time is there, I just have to manage it properly. :)

School is way worse than a job. I put in my time and they no longer have any hold on my time, school is a seemingly endless hill and there's always another demand of your time.

We don't. Life feels meaningless. I work 5 8's on graveyard, so I only have one full day off and it happens to be Monday... the day everyone else goes to work. When I get off work on Sunday mornings there's always that dilemma of whether to try and stay up all day or try to only take a short nap instead of sleeping the whole day. I've apparently punched my husband in the face for waking me up from my nap because I was way too tired from lack of sleep before work that I just couldn't wake up despite his multiple tries. Everyday is struggle to get out of bed. I tell myself I have to get up or I'll no longer have a roof over my head and I'll be like my coworker that is homeless and trying to survive by living out of their car and working 40 hrs plus a week and getting paid more than minimum wage. Vacation days are always amazing even if you're just staying at the house to chill.

Everyone in the world has the same amount of time in a week. People just decide to spend that time differently. Find out what’s important to you and dedicate your time to it. It’s the same as people who say they don’t have time to work out. They do, they just don’t care enough.

I feel you. After college I had two jobs and an internship. Then I got my masters degree and had a full time job. I felt so alone and empty and unfulfilled. Years of this. And it was hard and I didn’t date or see friends. I was almost no contact with most people because I was so preoccupied.

Now I’m done and have a job and a job alone and work 40hrs.

All my other time is me time. It’s time on a Thursday to drive to a friends house and walk to a local restaurant and take a couple hours for dinner and beers and then go home and cook lunch for the next day and watch TV. It’s enough time for me after work to stop by a French pastry shop after work today and buy a little box of macarons for my girl as a surprise and drop them off for her. It’s time for me to enjoy my weekend and go to a GoT party on Sunday.

Just give it time. Finish school and things will begin to come together. I’m almost 30 and it’s been rough but it gets better if you put in work. Some people get lucky and get college paid for and don’t need to work and then happen to find a great opportunity after college and have tons of free time at age 22. Others work until 35 to get that.

And then there are others who work their asses off forever and don’t. But you sound more like me. Keep chugging along.

I'm in the same type of position as you. I am in college as a junior pursuing my Bachelor's and I work a 20 hour/week part time easy clerical job at a law firm. I work 12 PM to 4 PM on weekdays. I started working here since last May when summer break started and 20 hours a week feels great. I have time to do piano playing after work. In the morning, I would hike (my other hobby), shop at the mall, go out shopping places, etc.

During the school year, I have no time to do things, because of SCHOOL! School and studying is what consumes most of your time. But honestly, I can't picture myself remaining humane working a real full time 40 hour per week job even though I have no desire to get married or have kids. When you have a family, that consumes a lot of time, and that's why I don't plan on having a family myself. I was never really into my relatives. I help my family with chores (especially when I had semesters with days off), which are kind of fun to me. Laundry takes time in my household, because the laundry machines are in the basement. Also, laundry builds up almost every other day. That's what happens when you have a family.

I am an IT major where SOME jobs are not the traditional 40 hour per week jobs. Some IT jobs can be partly working remotely from home, on-calls, etc.

Hey, so this comment may fall on dear ears, but I figure I have to say it. I'm probably similarly aged as you, I'm 21, and I'm finishing my bachelor's degree as well. I'm fortunate in a sense that I'm only working barely part time (2-3 days a week, 7 hour days) and that I get paid $20/hr. I also live with my parents, and the only bill I have is a $300 car payment per month. I net $500-$900 a month and use that to fund my hobbies.

I've quickly learned that part of becoming an adult is progressively accepting more and more responsibility as time goes on, learning to handle the stress and be okay with it, then growing as a person. Before I had my associate's degree, life was hard. I was working full time, I was pulling a full class load, and I was living on my own. My rent was cheap, though, and I still had time to myself every evening that was mostly spent doing homework. But, I learned to deal with it, I became less stressed about it over time, and in my last semester I nailed everything I was doing like I was bored with it.

I also learned to appreciate the little times that I get in the chaos, as the long periods of boredom with nothing happening are just that...boring. My video games wouldn't be an escape from a stress filled school day if there was nothing to escape from.

It's also important to remember that you're not technically an adult yet. Like, yeah, of course you are, you do your own schoolwork, you have a job, of course you're an adult. But, you're not at that part of adulthood that involves downtime. You will eventually have a job that either a) leaves you every morning off or b) gives you every evening off, and usually two days off as well, sometimes three! When you are finished with school, you will have plenty of free time. Most people agree that working and going to school is hell, especially for master's degrees and Ph.Ds.

It's also important to remember that you're going to college to create a better future for yourself and hopefully your family. You knew it was going to take time and be difficult when you went in, but you did it for future purpose. You're giving up your present for your future. Hang in there.

You aren't intended to have time if you're spending 40+ hours a week working your ass of and then 15+ hours per week recovering from the total mindfuck of working 40+ hours.

It's why I only work 24 hours per week. 3 days on, four days to do whatever I want with. It is glorious. As a result I'm getting close to publishing my first app.

Welcome to life in America, this is why all the lazy under 30 crowd is turning socialist. "it's so harrrrrd"

very short commute but first very low rent in a very fun city

well a traditional full time job is usually from 8 to 16h so thats like a good 6 hours of free time to meet friends, go to trivia night or take up salsa dancing. plus you've got your weekends, holidays and vacation... really when you dont have kids and nothing to study, having a life outside of work is pretty easy.

You might like this post about the book "How to live on twenty-four hours a day:" https://www.reddit.com/r/nonfictionbooks/comments/bjmwkw/booksummary_how_to_live_on_24_hours_a_day_by/

I've found that you take hours you can get. Like, instead of doing projects the entire day, it's broken up into an hour here and there.

If you want a life and work full time you better take the minimum full time credits. I did it..you just don't have a life if you do more than minimum full time.

They don't.

My work schedule is 2 weeks on, 1 week off. I regularly work 80-110hrs a week. While working I literally just have to eat, shower, and sleep. But on my week of I usually travel, it's basically a mini vacation. Maybe you could look for work with a similar schedule.

This might sound depressing but this has helped me so stay with me here. You have to hate yourself, not hate who you are as a person, just hate yourself as an object and consider yourself expendable. For example, I've just worked a 10 hour shift, I'm tired as hell but some friends want to go for a drink, so I don't give a shit if I'm tired, I'll just get more tired because fuck me, then I get in at 2am, now I'm drunk and tired, but I have personal projects I want to work on, so I'll work on that for 2 hours and get to bed at 4am, yeah the next morning I'll feel like shit but who gives a fuck, so now it's 6am and I'm hungover but I should probably get to the gym, so my ego can fuck right off because there's stuff to do, so I hit the gym, vomit a little bit, go to work, get back home. Now I'm exhausted, like really exhausted, but look at this, no one has plans, my personal projects are coming along well, I've worked 2 hard days and I've spent some quality time with friends and it's only Thursday night. My point is, no one has enough time to do everything they want to do but you can have a good go at it if you just run yourself into the ground trying. At some point you'll give out and you'll just need to take a day, but thay day will take up less time than sitting in front of the TV for 5 hours a night every weeknight for 30 years. Eat a lot and eat well, drink water all the time and find a spot to take 5 deep breaths every 2 hours. Be well.

It's fine until you have kids.

I get this. I work 50-60hrs a week and barely see anyone but my immediate family. I feel lost behind the shadow of my job.

Yea you are in school. You are working two jobs. Like I work 8 hours a day, 6-7 hours of sleep, a couple hours for doing chores and eating etc, then the rest is fun.

Because in america, work MUST be your life. Go Corportations!

I feel the same way. 40 hours per week, part time school on top of it. What’s a social life?

We dont!! Thanks, capitalism!!

Worked full time through college and now done with school work 200 hours a month (or more) plus have a family.

Lack of sleep during work stretches (not advised but required to have any decent chunk of free time), find short breaks at work to relax, and more importantly, if you want/have to work a lot, invest in the training to do something you love. If I worked behind a desk I'd probably have jumped offf a bridge by now (no offense intended to those who enjoy working behind a desk, as I'm sure some people may feel that way about my profession).

There is a good book I found on Kindle, its called "How to live on 24 hours a day" by Arnold Bennett. It was written in 1910 and is part of a larger series of books titled "How to Live".

Here is the full Ebook: How to Live on 24 Hours a Day.

Edit: Here is the Wiki article on the book. It gives a good explanation to the mentally behind the author, and it could more easily peak your interest in it than I ever could.

Wiki

Eventually you will graduate from school and have more free time. I have been in your situation while I worked at a grocery store, attended classes and worked at an internship. You can make it through this busy period of your life and find more spare time for a hobby.

This topic reminds me my situation last week. I stayed home sick from work to recover from an injury. I had too much free time, started going crazy and was eager to return to work. It's a different perspective at another stage in life.

I’m a nurse and work 3 -12 hr shifts a week. It’s the bomb. I will never work a job 5 days a week. So may not be helpful advice depending on ykhr career goals but if your can find a similar schedule in your life it makes things so much better

For me its work to live not live to work. I guess I've been somewhat lucky and I have made my own luck. I work 4 on 4 off and love it. I've been doing it for years. I have done the 9 to 5 weekday routine and hated it. I have no work stress because I do not want to have a career just a job that pays my bills. So for me make sure you dont stress about work unfortunately it is a necessity to live and that's all. Find a happy balance. My house is somewhat tidy but really it's no big deal for me as I want to enjoy my life and live it.

Do what it takes to enjoy life. If your still in school unfortunately it is sorta paying your dues. My life was crazy busy when I was in school and working with a family. Now I work 40 hours a week max and use every available minute to enjoy my family and my video games. School is a different beast but if you have a job that is leaving you feeling empty and unhappy, change the situation. Not always easy, not always done quickly but finding that sweet spot of work and play is worth it. I lucked out and have a job that encourages family first. So last minute use of PTO or leaving early just to take the kids to the park is cool. I don't abuse it but I do take advantage when I can. Hopefully your freedom is coming. Finish school, get that job you working towards and find your balance.

Youd be suprised to see how alive you feel when you live in the present momet ...i work a 7 to 5 job and always give myself about 40 min alone to reflect and be fully with myself allowing myslef to feel and think with no judgments ..if i cant make time for this whithin 2 days i dont feel my self follwed along with more stress ..time managment is key

In my last full time job, I worked 9-6 on Monday Tuesday and Friday, 8-5 Saturday, and 11-3 Sunday. I also lived pretty close to my job, so I could sleep in and go out and everything was cool.

My full time job before that I worked afternoons/nights (3-11 pm) so I really couldn't do much with friends and it sucked hardcore.

It just depends largely on your schedule and energy level. Anyone with your efforts would understand life sucks sometimes and are patient with your schedule and energy levels

I work 80 hours a week and I just have to squeeze the important people in. I have like 5 people I’m really close to and to try to stop by and see them all at least once a week for at least an hour. It sucks but thats just how it is

Depends on the job you get I suppose.

I work from roughly 7:30 to 4pm, get home around 5 factoring in commute and picking my youngest up from karate.

Go to bed around 11, so I've got roughly 6 hours a night, and I don't work on weekends, so there's plenty of time to do stuff.

Sunday's after church I tend to block out for laundry, and my kids are old enough to help with chores. (Plus the older one can watch the younger one if we want to go out for a date, see friends, etc).

I work full time as an MEP engineer in a firm in Manhattan, have about an hour commute door to door (drive to train to walk) and I manage to find about 3 hours a day to practice jazz guitar and drums (which I moonlight doing this). It's not easy, and I don't have a girlfriend, so that's a big part of it.

Having free time is a lot about mindset. Many people watch Netflix on the train, get home, have a beer and watch a baseball game, cook dinner and go to bed. Living this way will make you feel like you never have time because you can always drink beer and watch the game some more and who wouldn't want that?

Choosing more productive habits and minimizing your old time wasters is a huge part of this. I watch podcasts or read music books on the train so I feel like I am expanding my 'free time' as I actually enjoy my commute (most of the time, unless you take my seat and cut me in line on the LIRR you dick) Yes, you cannot video game for 12 hours straight and work full time, but If you can play in moderation, you can defiantly score 8PM to 11PM and weekends as full free time.

You definitely have more freedom as an adult, but definitely NOT more downtime. Everything worth doing requires a large scale commitment, having a family, working a full time job, working at your hobby. It is up to the individual to decide if working in your field for great pay but no free time is worth it or not.

You have a job and are going to school. That is TWO full-time jobs you have there.

Last year I got a co-op (internship that lasted for a summer + fall semester, in which you work full time and don't go to school) and it was awesome. True, it was 40 hours a week, but I left work at work. By that I mean when I went home, that time was mine.

So I would get up at 6 and be home by 4. From then until 10, I had free time. I went on walks with my gf, I played video games, I watched TV, I went out to dinner, I hung out with friends. It was awesome. Also, I got PAID. I could do all of this stuff I wanted to do, and still watch my balance go up.

Now I'm back to working part time and going to school. Though I'm only taking 12 credits, it's such a drastic difference to when I was working full time. 80% of my free time goes to homework, and even though I work 15 hours a week, I'm still losing money to rent.

I've got another internship coming up this summer and I couldn't be more excited to go back to working full time.

I'm in my mid 40s, so I've been working full time for many years now. I'm currently in my 5th different job since college, but I've been at the same company for 19 years now. Work-life balance is a real thing that you have to work out in order to find your best level of happiness. Suggestions: Try very hard not to commute to work. Live as close as possible to your work as wasting time sitting in traffic is soul-crushing to many people as you lose that precious "life" time. Also, try very hard to find work that is during the day, Monday through Friday. This is when most everyone else is working also, so it is easier to connect to others when you are working similar schedules. Try very hard to avoid working environments that expect or require copious amounts of overtime, especially on the weekends. The reason why I've stayed with my current employer for 19 years isn't because of the salary. I could have left for higher salaries at any point along these 19 years. I've stayed because it is 4 miles from my house and I'm home by 5:10pm every night and we don't work on the weekends. Not everyone can find such great situations, but when looking for jobs you may want to prioritize time for your life over a few more bucks at a workplace that you would need to commute to.

So I could never ever balance a full time job and a full time school schedule. But I work 40/hr a week M-F with a set schedule. I just plan my life around that to be honest. I have a tight schedule during the week so I can fuck around Sat and Sunday. It’ll get easier when you get out of college I think.

Try to work from home that’s what I do so I can kayak and cycle everyday and don’t have to listen to anyone

Your time management sucks or you are in that phase where you have too much on your plate to have a social life. school and a full time job is what i'm talking about. Finish school and get a full time job only and bam you have now freed up a ridiculous amount of free time.

Spend the time early in life and have more time later or spend it early and have less time later. Take your pick.

Ever wonder why your parents are asking you about your Christmas plans in September? Some adults have learned to plan out their social calendar weeks or months in advance, because free nights are few and far between.

Limit your commitments and prioritize what's important. Don't let people guilt you. If I chipped in at my kids school to the extent that they want, I would basically have a second job. Learn to tell parents and friends no, but schedule them in later.

Yeah, they don't. Am 33 yr old who works full time and has since 21.

It takes time. I wish I could have told myself in my early 20s that you can’t get everything right now and you have to work for it. I’m 33 now and have a great job that I love with a company that values their employees to have a lot of time off. I can’t just say it’s hard work, there are some good rolls of the dice that help out. But I felt that way as well when I was a broke 24 year old trying to feed my kids and working non stop. Keep your head up, work hard, and things usually can fall into place.

As someone who had a full time job and had to build a house in all my spare time for the better part of a year. Basically i just traded sleep for ime to enjoy myself. All this at once took a VERY massive toll on my physical and mental well being. But now that its done I suddenly have more free time than I know what to do with. Get your life in order first to where the only thing taking up your time is your job. I think you have more free time than you think you do. Maybe just get things in line first.

Im 25 and also make minimum wage in a small mountain village. Dont mistake me for a rich old guy with lots of cash. I had to do EVERYTHING myself. But now its done I set for life unless I plan to move (I dont)

For the short answer is less sleep. It takes a while to get used to it but during the week I like to wake up at 5am and go to the gym for an hour then take a quick shower and it is off to work. I am normally to work about 7, I try to only take a 30 minute lunch so I can get off early and enjoy the rest of the day! When it comes to studying back when I was in school there were countless nights where I only got 2-3 hours of sleep. But yes I didnt have much time to visit family as they lived two hours away so they would tend to use their weekends to visit me and we would go out to dinner or what not. I find that dinner is a great way to catch up with people as we have to eat to live so why not enjoy some time with others as you eat.

Wake up early. I was amazed how much more I got done when I got things done in the morning before work. If you work 9-5pm and get up at 5:30am and sleep at 10:30pm, there is 66 hours that you can invest into what you need to do and love. That is much more than you work. While in school this is going to eat into your time quite a bit. There is plenty of time in the day. Most business owners work well over 40 hours a day

Not wearing makeup and taking 15 minutes to get ready. I’m out of my house ~ 615 don’t get home til ~530 which means I’m in bed by 10 leaving me ~4 hours to do whatever I want less if I make dinner. It’s just how it is

I work a full time job and am a full time student. Honestly, I don't have much time to live. I'm not sure anyone in our position has time to live... it's rough. It's taken a huge toll on my mental health, but I've learned a lot.

The best thing I can recommend is to never lose sight of why you're working so hard. Get enough sleep, if you can. Put your health as a high priority and do your best to see the ones you love when you can. You may feel too busy, but if you can squeeze any time in to just relax with your boyfriend or eat a good meal before work, you will feel better than if you didn't.

This busy lifestyle is all about micromanaging time, and you will never be free enough to make tons of plans if you're living in it. Find joy in your studies and try to find positives in your job -- for me, I live by looking all the hard work in the eye. To loosely quote Albert Camus, like Sisyphus, the working man slogs their boulder back up the hill, and watches it tumble back down again. But in that moment when the boulder riches the pinnacle, he feels in himself a great and spiteful success against the inevitable.

Everybody is different, but that mentality is what allows me to thrive on most days. I hope you can find time to live how you want to.

My first job was a season at a gas station (i live in a touristic heavy (?) city, if you are young like me (20 at the time) it's HARD to find work outside of Summer. 6 days a week, 8-12 A.M and 3-7.30 P.M, for a 1000€ a month, it was boring as hell but at least the co-workers were all nice and fun to work with. Cut to the next summer, last year, and i found work in a gastronomy shop, i basically tended to the warehouse and the items in display, checking if all was in order. We also did home deliveries, people ordered food (sometimes specifically made for them) and i was the one who did the deliveries in scooter. Let me tell you, it was so much fun to work there, always something new to see or new people to meet. The shop was in a rich town, full of villas and nice houses, one time i even went to the villa of Giorgio Armani, that was a sick house.

I think you kinda just get used to it. Like, you have time to live, but you can’t find it because working takes so much out of you, and then you settle into it and every minute away from work is time for something you enjoy.

When I first started working full 40 hour weeks, I didn’t even hang out with friends on the weekend, and now it’s like, ā€œYEAH! I’ll go for beers with you at the end of my twelve hour day!ā€ And also, coffee. I don’t even drink coffee, but it’s gotten me through some rough weeks.

Everyone should read Rutger Bergman ā€œUtopia for Realistā€ amazing book sort of about this topic!!

Read or listen to the Richest Man in Babylon! Also, don’t listen to people that tell you you have to have a job ALL the time, take some breaks

You'll have more free time once you are out of school, but if you have kids you are back to no free time again for quite some time...

This is the wage slavery of capitalism. The free people at the top only have to work a few hours a week, if that. Because they were born there.

What do you mean "live"? We all have to work. Procreation is the meaning of life and that should be your "living" goal (or at least maintaining a relationship with someone).

You work your life away and what do they give? You're only killing yourself to live

BS

It gets better OP. I was that way for a while but at age 26 (almost 27!) I’ve been fortunate enough to relocate to LA with my girlfriend working in Aerospace making between 70-80k/year. It took a while but I’m finally at a point where I can afford my loan payments, car, rent etc.

In terms of free time, absolutely! Work 7:30-4 and then have the rest of the time for disc golf or gym time or hike with the dogs etc. Of course there’s cleaning and errands to run but those are quick. Then when Friday comes like today, leave early at work and have all weekend to do whatever!!!

Everyone questions it!!!!

I am almost 30 years old. Married. 3 kids. Full time job (715 am - 5pm) Workouts a couple days a week from 6pm -730pm My wife works Sunday/monday/Tuesday part time.

When I finally get home for the day, I eat, shit, shower and then that's about the time I need to tuck my kids in for bed.

Its heart breaking, not having more time with my kids, but they are my world and keep my going.

On one hand, being an ex athlete in college- I know the value of being busy.. because you just keep your momentum going and don't have time to fuck around. On the other hand, it's so easy to get burned out.

I watched Andrew yang talk about this contradiction in our society, and not just America but a lot of places around the world, where peoples identities and self worth are driven by careers and doing a job. But deep down nobody wants to work. So we live in this paradox where we act like we like working when in reality most people just want to be going home and doing stuff with their family and performing hobbies of their own.

I blame society! We need a real change how we think about work. Just being able to work from home would help a lot of people I think.

Honestly it isn’t as bad as it sounds, it’s all about budgeting time wisely.
There are 168 hours in a week, a full time job is only 40ish. That’s 128 hours to do everything else.

Here’s an average week for me, including work:

49 hours of sleeping 40 hours of work 6ish hours eating/cooking 2 hours of chores/showers/etc (quick showers and smaller apt = less cleaning) 5 hours of commuting (bus so I can read) 10 hours for exercise (mountain biking season is upon us!) 30 minutes of grocery shopping

That leaves 55.5ish hours free every week. 55.5!! After all that other stuff is done.

Currently, 30 of that is going towards learning a new skill. That STILL leaves me with 25.5 hours every week for time with the wife/hobbies/hanging with friends/whatever I want to do. Almost 8 hours every day, pure free time. Doesn’t work out that way logically (most of those free hours are on weekends), I’m just saying that to emphasize the point. Heck, I could stick a part time job in there and still have 5.5 free hours every week. Not that I would, I value my down time too much. But I could.

Anyone can do it, it just takes a bit of effort to stick to the schedule you lay out for your week. Obviously things will occasionally derail your plans (traffic, upset friend calls to vent for 20 minutes, whatever), but what’s an interruption here or there? I have 25.5 hours every week that I can give to whatever I want, 55.5 once I’m competent enough at Python to take on new projects at work and I can drop the 30 hours of study.

It sorta sounds weird to schedule every minute of your time, but I’m here to tell you, it’s life changing to see that schedule all laid out and realize how much time you actually have. And now that I’ve got a routine down, I don’t really schedule all of my time anymore, I know my averages and just shoot for them, the rest takes care of itself.

You got this!

You don't. You become your job. Make sure you like your job or it's going to suck. If you like it, it may be amazing.

I’m fortunate enough to work a very well paying job with a 4 on 4 off schedule. Never went to school after graduating high school. Even before I landed this job, I managed to find time somehow to spend with my family and hobbies. It takes some time to find the balance, but once you’re there, it’s great, even if the time is rather short.

I work 12 hrs a day 7 days a week, i know.....welcome to being an adult but the same thing day in day out means stability, and stability is good....so weather or not you are happy or see it that way, youre doing a good job, you should smile and be proud of yourself.

Holy shit same. I have class M-F and work 40hrs with Monday and Wednesday off. My boyfriend and I see each other probably once every two weeks, and maybe a couple hours during the week if I decide to lose a couple hours sleep. Basically I’m busy from 8am to 11:30 pm 90% of the time. I am both glad and sad that I am not the only one.

I skipped college, skipped working and live wherever I can. I steal food everyday and walk around or chill wherever. My life is my revenge on this evil planet of killing and death. I enjoy every single moment. I wear ratty clothes and steal toothbrushes as well. I do as I please until I die.

Exactly the reason why I don't get a job while I'm in college. Fortunately my parents back me up and I realize how blessed I am. I admire anyone who can work and study and have a life. Been there, couldn't do it. Maybe it's a maturity thing or self-discipline.

This what separates children from adults. They sacrifice SOMETHING to socialize every night. As a new a homeowner, it’s exhausting and a shit ton of work to clean and maintain everything like you should. There’s also home projects. So your friends either don’t have these responsibilities or they are just neglecting them (or sleep).

You're not an adult, yet. When you finish school, if you've made wise choices, you will find something that you enjoy doing and it won't feel so much like work. You may meet like minded people whose company you enjoy, and you'll have the money to enjoy hobbies. Skiing ain't cheap, but it's fun. Rock climbing is cheap and fun but takes a lot of time. Reading never gets old.You'll find balances. Have faith in yourself, you're asking the right questions at a young age, that's a good sign. Trust me, youth is the hardest time, it gets better and better. Partway through my 7th decade I can't believe how much easier life turned out than I thought it would at the time. Cheers!

Same thing here. Maybe it gets better after college

Its starting to become more common that employees work from home. If you can WFH 2-3 days a week, youll be able to balance your life a little better and not feel overwhelmed. Working out during lunch time, do a load of laundry, pay bills, look for a job that allows WFH a few days a week.

Loooooool. WELCOME TO LIFE FRIEND.

Welcome to life! šŸ™‚

I work an average of 80 hours a week. When I do get those rare 40-50 hour week, I have SO MUCH TIME for me. It's all about making time for what you do. Prospective.

Wait till you have kids? 4 am will become your wake up time and you’ll still behind schedule. Find time now to spend with your grandmother, laundry can wait. (Do laundry at her house, study at her house).

My boss is (thankfully) all too aware of this and has been trialling a different work schedule in the office (8-4 rather than 9-5) it's great. waking up an hour earlier has made virtually no impact on our morning tiredness but a huge impact on our time at home after work. Its made a difference in our work too. The first hour we spend at work now is much more chilled, we know people don't expect a response at this time so we can be more relaxed in our morning tasks before the rush starts. And we go home at 4 and have so muxh more time to run errands, see daylight, relax and what-have-you. Small change, massive impact.

Welcome to life.

Not going to lie, when I worked only 4 days a week, daytime, I was much happier with my life than I am now, with full time. It was harder work, and of course 4 days doesn't pay as much as 5 days a week. But having Friday off was amazing. I wish I had cherished that time longer. I also didn't need to decompress so much because my work was physical labour and not so much mental energy being stolen.

Now I work 5 days a week, one week from 7 am - 3 pm and one week 3 pm to 11 pm. I'm up at 5.30 for the early weeks, and I need 8+ hours sleep each night to function, so needless to say I'm in bed very early. When I get home around 3.30, I really need to just wind down. I try not to watch TV for so long, sometimes just an hour. Sometimes more, but I usually do multiple things at the same time, like watch a bit of TV while I chill out with some games or something. Then I make dinner and spend the evening on my projects, or just chilling some more, depending.

On my late shifts, I feel like I can't get anything done. If I need to run some errands, I have to go into town earlier and just do everything before work, and if I'm shopping then I end up having to take it with me at work.

I get home around midnight and need 1 -2 hours to decompress and can't fall asleep until around 2 - 3 am. The more restless I am at night, the later I sleep in the morning. Somestimes I can't get up until 11 am. So I have until around 2 pm before I have to get ready for work.

I feel like this constant change between going to bed at 2 am and 9 pm isn't really too healthy, but there's not much to be done with it.

Most of my weekends are free, but sometimes I have to go to work on those days too, so I can't get any errands done and I end up just having to post pone shit all the time.

Since I work shifts, I can't leave work for anything unless my superior is there to fill in or something, so getting a doc's appointment or anything to fit is just a fucking hassle. Sometimes it feels like my life revolves around going to work, being at work, coming home from work and preparing for work.

Anyway, I think I have it pretty good compared to other shifts I've done, but I really wish I only had daytime shifts. I'm just happy I get most weekends off atleast.

This is why I only agree to work a max of 30 hours a week and try to keep it at 24 hours.

I wont accept any position that requires more than 30 hours. It's not worth the toll it takes on you even if it's doing something you love.

Try full time job with full time school... I just turned in my finals and I have crippling anxiety because it's over. Like wtf do I do now?

I never found that it was hard to spend a few hours with my wife and mess around with my hobbies after work. Got home at 4:30 and went to bed at 10:30 or so. We just don't spend a lot of time sitting on the couch. So that left us with 6 hours to go downtown or play a few board games. More recently we got jobs with a 4x10 schedule so we always have 3 day weekends but a little less time in the evening. It's much nicer though.

But anyway, you'd probably have a ton of free time if you weren't in school as well. I never had any. I was always doing homework. Things will calm down eventually. House maintenance doesn't take long either if you're always doing little couple minute bits of it.

Not all jobs are M-F 8-5 jobs. There are losrs if work at home jobs, variable schedule jobs, etc. my job is a salaried full time position where I work for a week and I’m off for a week. This affords me plenty of time to have a ā€œlifeā€ outside of work. I chill with my boyfriend (who works a fulltime job that is 3 days a week), take my dogs to the park, go to the gym daily, dinners, concerts, travel.

[removed]

I’m a flight paramedic, my bf is a nurse. I have a friend who is in IT who works completely from home at his own pace and makes over $100k/yr.

[removed]

I mean he basically taught himself coding, studied, got certified.....and then spent YEARS working in an office. It’s not like it was his first job. That’s impossible.

how are adults who work full time able to have full on lives with unique hobbies

Source: Dad, with wife & 3 kids, mortgage, HOA president, 45hr / week job with 40min / day commuting, with health issues that cut into sleep quality.

Yeah that is the trick isn't it? Some people sacrifice the QUALITY of something in that equation. They do crap jobs parenting, or they don't slack there, but they haven't called friends in months, preferring to just FB stalk / like / comment at night in bed waiting to fall asleep (may be that is just my ~40yr old generation).

May be once every 2-3 months There is some form of a get together (usually a kid birthday or something like that) where everyone gets together.

I think how a lot of us "manage" all this is deciding priorities. House doesn't actually need to be spotless as it turns out. May be buying less shit that has to be cleaned up is a good idea.

Also, don't estimate the partnership aspects of marriage. I'm out 48hr a week slogging a keyboard so my wife can stay at home and NOT do a shit job raising our kids (she also homeschools the 3 of them). So we divide the responsibilities so that 24hrs x 7days doesn't equal no down time.

Yeah it is less than we want of course. But don't forget that for the most part, recent generations have had more free time then all previous generations because productivity is so much higher per person-hour of work. We get more done in less time. 200yrs ago teens unless aristocratic wouldn't have any time to just sit around and hang out with friends. They would be apprenticing at some job and working. And marriage happened sooner so that there was a helper doing what you weren't (again assumes very traditional roles).

If you were the worker, then the other was the cooker & cleaner. If you were the teacher and kid raiser, then someone else was out in the woods chopping down trees, making bricks.

You just fucking do it. Get off Reddit and do it.

Quit asking and start doing. There are 168 hours in a day, you sleep for 56 of them, you work for 40 more, that leaves 72 hours a week to do whatever the fuck it takes.

You have plenty of time, you're just here asking questions when you should be just doing your laundry.

Depends what you want to do in your spare time. It honestly gets a lot easier. I work 35-40 hours a week, boyfriend works about the same. We still have time to go to the movies, go to visit relatives, take day trips, clean the house up, or just sit around and play video games. It takes a while to get used to, but it is possible. I will admit that I felt like I had way less time to do things when I was in school full time and working full time. You honestly just figure it out.

Tonight we are leaving straight from my work to see a movie at a nice theater and get dinner. But a normal night is me going home, throwing a load of laundry in, and playing video games for five hours.

You just figure it out.

Sadly, we just don’t have time to live, so we don’t

I got sick of never having time and made my hobby (bodybuilding) into a career. I coach 25-ish athletes, do spray tanning for bodybuilding shows, judge shows, and do personal training out of a few gyms. My husband and I are also partners in a supplement company. I build my schedule around my life and not the other way around and most of my ā€˜work’ feels like hanging out with my friends. I could never go back to Corporate life.

Nah man.

A couple months back I was working 86 hours and partying 4 times a week, didn’t sleep much but I didn’t really need to, life was fun.

Now I’m working 55 and feel like I have less time,

You make time, not find it.

Been there. I would go to work and drive to school (internship) or vice versa. In the time between I would either eat, sleep, or study. Then grind it out. I definitely feel that I missed out on fun young adult social things that my friends were doing. It’s as if I had moved away and their lives continued without me. Eventually you will learn how to manage time. And if you’re a student this won’t be your life forever. Hang in there.

I just can’t even put into words how entitled this post and replies sound. Welcome to the real world. Now aren’t y’all lucky you HAVE a job and food and somewhere to sleep every night rather than worrying about ACTUAL LIVING ESSENTIALS in your first world paradise? THIS is why we can’t have nice things!!

How I do things is wake up, get ready for work, work, get home and eat, clean up, chill for a bit then bed, continue untill weekend, weekend wake up an hr or 2 later, actually clean(vacuum, laundry, sparatic dusting) then chill for a bit while I eat, do dishes, go to the store, tidy kitchen to put things away, do any other random things that need to be done, TV for an hr or so, bed and the next day is me day(with cleaning up after myself as I go)

As far as my advice goes there is not much living that an be done when working 9_5, you haven't even covered time for a partner, children or commute. Weekends will be for soccer games. I think because you are intent on self improvement by studying and asking the obvious questions you are likely to do well at work which means your earnings will be pretty good, which mean you an live closer to work, get a maid and flexible hours here and there. Work out efficiency, in your day to day, I mean gross maybe but this is where you brush your teeth while on the toilet, (as an example) maybe unhygienic but it saves you 2 minutes. Get up earlier, which is likely to require you to eat healthier which has other benefits such as ability to sleep well. Track your time and see where it goes, you will find you can multi sense of the tasks during commute etc. The rich dad poor dad book has good views on time as a resource. Ultimately no one is free under capatalism. If you don't work harder than the next person they will get the merit and the flexi hour and money. You can alternatively choose to exit the rat race by partnership with marriage to share the burdens of life working on an exit strategy.

You can make it work if you just half-ass certain things and multi-task others. It's true that I have very little time after work to enjoy myself but here I am sitting at work in my office right now enjoying Reddit.

I do my grocery shopping in small portions and I try to go either on my way home from work or late at night when the store is empty if I have to do a larger shopping. When it's late at night there are fewer people in my way and shorter or non-existent lines. I know what I want before I walk in and just pick it out. If you sit there and browse for an hour you're sacrificing other free time.

I have a washer/dryer combination unit so I put dirty clothes in before work and they are clean and dry when I get home from work without any intervention. Just a quick fold and they're ready to wear again. You may not have the option to buy your own washer and dryer but if you do that's what I recommend. Otherwise just do laundry when you know you're going to be busy doing other things so you don't have to watch it.

As for getting gas I just go when I'm low and I consider the time used to be negligible since it's probably less than five minutes per week.

As for cleaning, I do my best to avoid making a mess and I just go on a cleaning rampage once in a while. If you can control yourself enough to immediately clean up after yourself you'll find that you rarely need to spend a several hour block of time to clean.

Try to do multiple things at once when you can to save time. Go to your Grandma's house to do homework and eat if possible. Your grandparents aren't around forever and you're better off seeing her half-assedly than not at all. If you can do that you've just killed three birds with one stone.

I work 40 hours in 4 days and have three days off every week. There are non traditional job options out there that you might like better than the typical 9-5. You won't feel so jammed up when you aren't doing school stuff anymore.

Minimalism. I know some people take it too far, but in general I believe owning less is liberating.

  1. Saves time. You don't waste as much time looking for things or cleaning. Your mind is also less cluttered when you don't have as many "things" around you demanding your attention.

  2. Saves money. Look around your room, in your closets, drawers, etc. What do you own that you've hardly used? Did you really need that thing? I think most people can save a lot here and there by not buying things they "kind of" want. Next time you want to impulse buy something, wait a few days or a week. Still really want it? Then maybe buy it. But there is a reasonable chance you'll realize you don't really need it. Instead you'll be able to put that money towards things you really want and/or save time by working less since you aren't buying as much.

I did what you are doing with a wife and two small kids to boot. It’s called delayed gratification. You are working towards a goal and the outcome will allow you to get out ahead of the minimum wage shackles and actually save for retirement (since there are no more pensions and social security will be gone, try working minimum wage at age 70).

I was in the army (definitely full time and then some). I went to community college, got transferred to another base, started again. I stuck with it and when I graduated I never looked back

Trust me, you’re doing the right thing.

The current work week in developed countries is 40 hours. People used to work 6 days a week, 10 to 12 hours a day, not too long ago. In poorer countries people still work long hours.

Get some perspective.

People work in sweatshops. People work the fields all day long. People hope for work so they can eat.

Who ever said life was supposed to be fun and entertaining?

oh how i feel for this... i work 50+ hours a week now and luckily all i have to do is take care of myself (23 YO), i have free time on weekends but weekdays i have no life... i dont get how people raise families, work, and go to school.. sounds impossible

Your job is your life.

Welcome to adulthood.

I commute 4 hours for work, my job is from 8:30am to 7pm, I normally Get up at 6 am and leave around 6:30, breakfast is prepared before hand in the previous evening, it’s all about how disciplined and organized.

Whenever I feel busy with my full-time job, commute, part-time college courses, two children, and my horse I wonder where my time goes. And yet I find time to sit for an hour or two on Reddit in the evenings sometimes. I look at Elon Musk who runs several large companies and put it into perspective. I have time in the day. And also this: https://waitbutwhy.com/2016/10/100-blocks-day.html

Isn't 40 hours just 9-5 5 days a week? Is it bad that that doesn't seem like a whole lot? It's going to school

You don’t have time. I just started working at a bank in February and I work 8:30-6:30 on Monday and 9:15-6:30 the rest of the week and then 8:45-12:15 on some Saturday’s. Plus I have a 30 min drive from my house to my job. I get home at 7 at night if I’m lucky and if I have to cook dinner from scratch it’s 9 by the time it’s done then I eat, watch a little tv and go to bed. It’s miserable but I need to pay the bills somehow. I haven’t seen my mom in 6 months even tho she’s only a 3 hr drive away which is nothing to me I enjoy long drives...but I’m so exhausted the thought of driving that tired scares me out of ever going to see her. :( Also I feel so sorry for my dogs not having me there to play with. ;-;

My schedule during the week (M-F) is I wake up at 5:30, get to the gym by 5:45, get home by 6:45, leave for work by 7:30, get there at 8:15ish, leave at 5pm, get home around 5:45, eat dinner at 6:30, relax and then I’m in bed by 8 and asleep by 8:30.

But the weekends I spend it with my boyfriend, family and friends. Dinners, movies, going on trips. Thankfully my job has unlimited PTO so taking days off for fun and vacations isn’t a problem but you just gotta make due with the weekends sometimes. Like during the week watching jeopardy with my family is fun time for me. It’s relaxing and something I enjoy. Just make the most of it.

Easily. I have a full time job with very flexible hours. I am also a full time archer and train 5 days a week after work for 3 hours. I compete most weekends. I would struggle if I had a family, but it's pretty much a case of pick which 2 out of 3 things you want (on the triangle thingy). That being said, if I wasn't so serious about my archery I could probably balance social life, work and archery better.

Full time in college, while working 40+ hours a week in retail here. As far as "going out" I don't really get that opportunity unless I plan it three weeks in advance and request the day off. The only other thing I do is unhealthy and will most likely cause more issues than it solves, but I will typically stay up late nearly every single night. It usually leads to less than 6 hours of sleep every night, but I have to compromise either sleep, a social life or my GPA, so that's what I decided

This is a great question. It really comes down to ā€œusā€ AKA the working class, not fighting for better working conditions. Why should we all be working 40 hours a week (like the Industrial Age) when worker productivity and technology are at an all time high? We could have 6 hour work days, or 4 day work weeks, and everything would be fine. People could take different shifts (some work Mon - Thurs, others take off Monday, etc) and we could have a more flexible and evolved work and life balance.

However, this requires getting involved in politics, making labor movements, demanding change from politicians, etc. Basically, we could have it better, we just don’t want to put in the effort. It’s kind of a bummer, really.

The biggest difference by far is you can really have your weekends to enjoy life in many cases. With school there's always assignments, reading, group projects etc. School life doesn't end when you leave class. In a lot of jobs you can leave your work behind when you leave the office.

I currently work a 40hr week but have the weekends off. It changes, but right now I hang out with friends on Wednesday evening when we all are off work. We get food, play games, chat just enjoy eachother. We also get together on the weekends when we have more free time. It's about using the time that you do have free to do something with. But considering your school obligations I can understand how you might have a harder time with that.

In my line of work on any given daybi may have 2-3 hours of "free time" a day, being as i work full time + weekends in construction. To be frank its a routine schedule. Home, exercise, music lesson, dinner, shows/games, sleep work. At best i get 30 -45 minutes of hobbies in a day but I've lear ed that alternating my days, such as music on mon,wed, fri, and games on every other is how i fully enjoy what i have. Yes is it depressing when you really think about how much time and effort we sometimes trade just to attempt happiness but in those 30/45 minutes i enjoy my life to the fullest in my hobbies.

UBI baby!

I don't know how anyone does it and there's absolutely no reason anyone should have to work 40 hours a week. We should be able to live on 20. Or even less.

Honestly I figured out how to function on 5 hours of sleep

I honestly dont know how I do it. It's incredibly draining.

If it wasn't for my wife and mortgage I'd probably be fucking off somewhere in Asia as a boat tour guide or some shit.

The way I see it is your options are:

Value free time above money and deal with compromise to financial freedom

Get a job you love so it is your hobby

Get a job that pays really well and spend what little free time you get on nice vacations.

I love my job, so being there 50+ hours doesn't feel like a burden. The only other hobby I have, if you could call it that, is working out. To do that I just go at 5 when they open, shower and change for work there. Once you are married and working for a salary, not having the same social life is kind of a given. All your friends will be in the same position, so unless you want to keep replacing your friends with new crops of twenty-somethings, that's just part of life. Make the times you do hang out more special. I still go to a couple music festivals a year and now that I have money, every time I go out, I can have more fun because I'm not stressing about how much I spend. You are trading your current problems for new ones. Not having free time is a better problem than stressing about having enough money for bills all the time IMO. That's the kind of stress that is cumulative and is dragging you down, even when you aren't actively thinking about it. Once it's gone, you'll know though.

You know there's an entire set of political ideologies dedicated to addressing this exact issue, right?

I feel the same. From what I understand, a lot of it is the USA (assuming you are from there if you've voiced this problem). We work insane amounts and more of the year. I have heard of work environments where they have Wednesdays off, way more vacation time, etc in European countries. I have also heard in Germany they have contracts in almost every job, so you're guaranteed that job for 6 months to a year. That would be a lot less stress in general. Siestas in Spain in the afternoon. In general, the US is overworked and I think people like you are mentioning that "have time" for stuff are just neurotic. My housemate "pencils people in" weeks in advance and it stresses me out just to be around him. I don't have a lot of close friends because I either watch TV, read, or play games after work. I would rather do that than try and square in "going out" when I'm already tired. Also I have a dog so we chillax together.

You are not alone.

This is the first thing you learn as an adult: the grind is real and seemingly never stops. This is why suicide is so popular.

Work smart, not hard.

Work from home.

Get a dog.

Get a job you enjoy doing and you’ll be ā€œlivingā€ every day and won’t think of it as a work.

The world is full of people who work full time (more than 40 hours) and find time to have full lives. You just have to prioritize and make the most of your time outside of work.

I started working a full time job a few years ago and I've found that I'm having a harder time taking care of myself. This is all excuses but I feel like I've lost complete motivation to take care of myself because I'm exhausted from work.

Time Management. Make Time for things that are important for you. Once you get out of school, though, things should be somewhat easier because work just takes up a single block of time.

You have to learn to make the best of the time you have after/before work. On that note - as a factory worker, Second Shift is absolute hell because it splits your day. Even Third shift - overnight - is better, because you can choose to be active before or after work as needed.

The thing to remember, is that when we got the 8 hour working day, which we had to fight for, the way we lived was very different. Most industrial workers were still in the cities. Work was a 5 minute walk from home, you got an hour lunch (paid in some cases) to eat and run errands in the middle of the day (that's why most downtowns are dead anymore, workers can hardly leave work at lunch anymore). Walk 5 minutes home at the end of your 8 hours. On top of that, who is working has changed, more homes have two person incomes, which means more housework to do across the board as nobody is doing it during the day.

It's all about how you handle it. When I was in college I was fortunate enough to have some scholarships, loans, and some family support. Even with all that I still lived in shitty apartments with high crime and ate McDonald's dollar menu or ramen most days. Because my family was helping I felt obligated to be at their beck and call but the upside was a lot of free time for myself.

Again, thankfully I was supported well enough to not NEED to work and go to school but I'm sure my apartment situation, diet, and spending income would have been a lot better. But, that was a sacrifice I made because at the time I didn't care about living comfortably. I just needed a place to eat, shit, and sleep while I was in school.

Now that I'm an adult my time is a lot more free since I just have work and not to many other obligations. Being a nurse also helps since I can just work three 12hr shifts each week and have four days off. There are a lot of other careers with flexible working hours out there you just need to find the right fit. Your schedule will be a lot more free to once you don't have to juggle a full time job AND college. That's hard for just about anyone. Hang in there it'll get better.

Edit for my terrible spelling

I work 50 hours a week, I watch GoT, have a 2nd job I do a few times a year that I travel for, Kayak with my girl, play videogames, shoot, and hang with family. You have to learn to make time and take time, believe me when I say it took about 10 years to master.

I work 9 till 5 and thars it, screw this working till 9-10pm every night. I walk in at nine and leave at five. Loving close to work also helps. I walk to work in half an hour, so I get up at between eight and quarter past eight to be at work for nine. I dknt really care what I look like, the benefit of being a guy I guess. Get up brush teeth, jeans and t shirt and I'm good to go.

I'm back home for half five so it's all good. That leaves plenty time to do personal stuff. Be it studying stuff I'm personally working on or going out.

The only time it's a problem if I go out during the week and have a late night. Being out till three or four am being back at work at nine can be rough!! Leave the partying to the weekends!

But here's the big secret everyone doesn't tell you, most people don't have this big active social life and loads of interesting hobbies, Facebook, Instagram etc isn't real life. Don't judge yourself against these false personas people try to show online. Youre doomed yo be depressed if you do. You aren't really missing out. Honestly.

Most of us go to work. Go home, make dinner then lie on the sofa and watch netflix, play computer games etc.

The weekends are for seeing friends and doing stuff.

What you're experiencing is normal adult life.

I purposefully looked for and found a job that works 12 hour shifts 36 hours a week. The result is I have 4 days off in a row every week. It also pays higher than any job I’ve had on the past, at $17/hr. Hell, in 2 years I’ll be at $25/hr. No college.

[removed]

Yeah. Easy work, decent pay. Ever worked production?

Don’t sleep

Full time job is like highschool. You go to work. Then come home Also it might help to nit get to work 2 hours before your shift

I go and go and go so much in my time off that when I return to work it feels like I’m just relaxing and taking time to breathe

I got a masters degree while going to school two nights a week, working full time, and starting my consulting firm. I always found time each weekend to spend time with friends and family. It’s all about priority and commitment.

I’m a full time student with a part time job and an internship and I only have at most 10 hours a day to sleep, socialize, and take care of other stuff. It’s to the point that I’ll purposely skip a class to do one of the other things I need to do.

It’s only a temporary situation but I do have thoughts of how my life would be much simpler if I just up and quit everything and just got a full time job but I’m so far into this mess it’s hard to think of what my life would be like if I wasn’t doing this.

Easy, you sacrifice sleep for free time.

Our corporate overlords have deemed adequate sleep unnecessary.

Stop spending 2 hours getting ready for work for a minimum wage job to be perfectly honest.

Also you’re in school and working. Cut out the classes and the studying on off class days and you have what most normal people have as free time.

I feel your pain! I’m currently in school doing about 12 credit hours and although I was working a full 40+ hours a week, I just recently had to cut back my hours to ~30 due to having legitimately no free time. I also barely had any time to do my schoolwork because after my shift is over I’m exhausted and go right to sleep.

Even with the cut back on my hours Iā€˜m still struggling, but it’s better. I highly recommend you do that if your job allows you to. I also plan every single thing I do out, including my free time. It’s really hard, but if you mess around and try to figure out what best works for you than I’m sure you’ll find a way to achieve social, work and academic success!

Not many people are able to do what you are doing, so be proud of that. Good luck! :-)

I feel you. I work 45+ hours a week, doing manual labor. And I go to a university as well. Shits rough sometimes man, just gotta power through.

I have 3 jobs. One full time, two part time. I don’t live. Literally.

Welcome to college. Life gets better after you graduate. Imagine no more studying and coming home from work at 5:30. No tests to study for, no reports to type, no chapters to read. The only thing you have to do is make dinner and clean-up. It's now 7-7:30 and you don't go to bed until 10 or 11. You got 3 to 4 hours to do whatever you want. Oh...and the weekends! Watch out!!!

Basically you make time for things you consider important. You make plans months in advance for things you want to go and do. You make a budget and stick to it.

You sacrifice having everything you want right this second for what you consider important later.

I’m a full time student now, so that’s easy for me. However, before I was a full time student I was a union gas laborer and I refused to work any overtime. 40 hours a week for me. Monday through Friday 7am to 330 pm. There was still plenty of time after work to do other activities. A lot of people have a hard time telling their employer no so that cuts into your own free time. A lot of other people have a hard time living within their means and have to take every bit of over time they can get so they can cover their expenses. Don’t be one of those people.

You obviously don’t have kids....

This has been weighing heavily on me as well. Another big part of it is working an unfulfilling job. There’s the saying ā€œDo what you love and you’ll never work a day in your lifeā€, but most of us dont have that luxury. I speak to (mostly) ungrateful business owners with technical support problems for 40 hours of my life every week.

Just like you said, I get hom at about 5:30 - 7:00 (depending on traffic and errands) then I shit/shower/clean/cook/eat and then once all that is done its about 9:00 - 10:00. My girlfriend can barely function if she doesnt go to bed by 10-11, so that gives us 1-2 hours of free time every night if you dont count the necessities above.. we then wake up at 7 AM, straight back to work at 8:30, rinse and repeat. I literally feel like 2019 began yesterday but we’re already almost HALF WAY THROUGH IT. I have very few memorable experiences to reflect on in my daily life that makes the weeks seem like they were lived.

Its very depressing, which then leads you to have less motivation/energy so you are even less likely to do anything after work and on the weekends.

I work Mondays 9am to 8 or 8:30pm and 11am to 8 or 8:30pm Tuesday through Friday and 9am to at least 2pm but often later every Saturday. Many saturdays are more like 9-5. I have one day off and that is for shopping, cleaning, visiting my dad, hobbies, rest....everything.

Tuesday to Friday I usually go to the gym from 9 til it’s time to leave for work. Or that’s my time to go to the dentist, get the oil changed, do a quick extra load of laundry, etc.

I choose between enjoying a lazy Sunday (after grocery shopping and cleaning) or going and doing something I enjoy like scuba diving or hanging out with my dad.

I’m tired a lot, sure, but I have a rewarding (emotionally) job and make sure that I spend time on things I love too. Sure going diving on a Sunday wipes out all my free time but relaxing under water is amazing. I enjoy the drive out to the lake and time with friends when I’m there.

You HAVE to take time for yourself. There is enough time in the week, but you do have to make sacrifices sometimes. Adjust your routine. Just an example...You spend an extraordinary amount of time ā€œgetting readyā€ for work. You could do laundry during that time (assuming you don’t have to go elsewhere for laundry).

You can make time.

Two tips:

  1. Find a field you can have work/life balance.
  2. Be willing to bust ass to get to a place where you can really enjoy it.

I never thought I'd be a "corporate drone" type. I'm a software engineer for a major American TV and broadband provider, in a middleware unit. I am 29, and have spent most of my life working odd jobs and fucking around. I hit a certain point where having "free time" was... Not fun anymore. It was depressing. So, I spent a couple months doing classes for \~80 hours a week, then entered the job market in tech. I spent a year and a half consulting, while working one of my odd jobs (can't say what since those two facts is nearly enough to dox me). It had to work 90+ hours a week that year, including days where I'd wake up, work 5 hours manual labor, go home, nap, shower, work 5-10 hours on a research project, go work for another 5 hours of manual labor, sleep, and do it again. For 3-4 days at a time.

After a year of that, I finally was able to land a salaried position, and now, I get to wander in to the office around 9-930, and can leave anytime after 4, and that's just regular days. If I call in to our morning meeting, I don't have to be in until 11. To top it all off, I'm free to wander off if I get tired or bored (which I did today- emotional week so I left at 1pm).

The key is finding work that truly exhausts you. Not emotionally, but mentally and/or physically (I guess emotionally if you're in that kind of field, but that's not for me). When I'm putting my full effort forward, I can create value. I can't create value without that capacity, and the system we work on is so complex NO human can understand it solo, so we all have to do our best and bust ass when we can, but if we can't, it's ok. Get your work done, and all will be well!

Hope this helps a little.

TL;DR: was a slacker, got bored, worked 80+ hours a week for two years to retrain myself and find a better job. Now working on average 35 hours a week (30 if you don't count lunches), living two minutes from the office. Still working hard, much happier.

They dont

You had time write this shit you got time for your grandma

There is a good book about work and managment time. it's called "getting things done". You have a lots of things in your life and you should manage it in smart way.

I work in full time job and have about 3 hours of study/project per day, time for cooking and relax... its only about your priority and time managment.

p.s. its only works in you're healthy.

You may be sleeping too much. Probs a healthy amount, but too much for what you want to accomplish. I went to school full time and worked 30 hrs a week at and did physical therapy 3x/wk and still partied once on the weekend for my sanity. I got roughly 5-6 hrs a night of sleep, thank God for coffee and espresso shots. My day started with getting up at 6 am and ending with my going to bed around 12-1am. It's a cutthroat life but it's possible. I burnt out a bit after ~3 yrs tho.

The answer is I'm not alive.

I'm just this empty shit husk meandering for about 4 hours a day before I go back to sleep to do this shit again.

For me it’s about sacrifices. I’m a 16 credit our college student and I work 45 hours a week in a kitchen. I try to get with my group of friends every chance I get. Sometimes sacrificing a little study time or sleep just to do it. Because in all honesty with out my friends I probably wouldn’t be here. They are quite literally all I got.

You're supposed to pick a job that fulfills your life. Don't waste your time working in a place that makes you feel this way.

So basic. Yeah life's a bit rigged .

I just do things in order as much as possible. School/work/life(family) then if maybe if I feel like it friends. Just hang out by playing games or just a group chat from home...saves you so much money. lol

deleted ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^0.7639 ^^^What ^^^is ^^^this?

Well college is your life, so that you can make a better life. Sacrifice now for the greater good. Before college, paycheck to paycheck, after college still paycheck to paycheck but I have a lot more free time.

You go to school and work 5 days a week - that's a huge reason you don't have time for anything. Working 5 days a week but not having to do school leaves a lot of time open, at least for me. I also purposely chose to live close to work (10 minute commute) so that I have that little bit of extra time. Once you're done school, you'll have a much easier time.

Dude, same. I’m working two jobs and pushing 40+ work weeks while fumbling around in college. Honest to God, organizing anything with anybody always falls through as I never have time. Any free time I do have is usually spent in the study hall.

cut down on sleep and screen time

Three words - Work From Home.

This is why city jobs are underrated. Depending on where you live, they’re a great option. I got my bachelors, worked a 5 day a week job, and had no time. Saturday’s were cool, Sunday’s we’re just miserable because I knew I had to work the next day.

Then I became a firefighter. Sure, it’s not for everyone, but I wanted my free time. Now, I work 7-8 24’s a month, and usually have 2-3 days between shifts. My life has far benefitted from this. I recommend it to anyone who has that option.

I have a full time job, 2 young kids, a wife, and a home. This is something I struggle with on a daily basis. My general routine goes like this.

Get up and get dressed. Wake kids up and get them going. Make kids lunch and breakfast. Do dishes from night before. Drop kids off at school. Do work. Pick kids up. Make dinner. Spend time with kids. Put kids to bed. Spend time with wife. Catch up on work / free time.

Usually the catch up on work / free time is at 10 o'clock at night. I am lucky in that I get to work from home a majority of time, but I always feel that I am sacrificing sleep in order to do the things I want to do. I try to at least get 6 hours.

The weekends are usually a little bit less hectic, but kids usually have a birthday party / play date / sport activity that I will escort them to so it usually means it is 10 pm when I have free time for me.

The place I work at operates on for 10 hour days with Friday off. It starts at 6am and I go to 4, living close to work helps. I used to commute 1 1/2 hours one way now I'm down to 10 minutes one way. You'd be amazed at the free time you have if you get up early and don't commute far.

Many people don’t have alternative choice and they do what’s necessary. You set yourself goals and make sacrifices to achieve them, whether that’s doing more hours for luxuries, living in certain locations, bettering yourself etc.

I prioritise work life balance, this translates to taking roles which offer home working and flex time. Standard hours are 35, possibly 37.5 - exceptional peaks and troughs. I enjoy autonomy and manage my own work stack and time. All above salary.

This allows me the freedom for the rest.

I sympathise with you, I can’t comprehend an 1 hr+ commute to and from which eats into my day. Gym+ family life. The mental stress would be overbearing.

Taking life at your own pace is undervalued and getting up early to seize the day.

Track the amount of time you spend doing things. Let's say you work 45 hours a week, 5 days a week. That is 9 hours in the day. An hour commute each way. There's 11 hours gone. Making food to bring to work and eating breakfast and dinner at home, an hour and a half of the day. 12.5 hours gone. Showering? Half hour for the day. 13 hours gone. Bathroom when at home and not at work and not including showering time, let's say it's an hour. 14 hours gone. Misc stuff, half hour of the day. 14.5 hours. Prepping for the day, .5 hours. 15 hours gone. let's say you sleep for 8 hours, that's an hour free every day of the weekday. weekends are free. So you still have some time assuming your spending along time on many tasks that can be done shortly or simultaneously.

It's about planning ahead, not wasting time on Reddit, and working efficienctly

your title is very misleading considering you only put full time job and not with school. Kind of important detail. 2 hours to get ready? Sure driving can take a bit but I really don't know why or how it takes you 2 hours to get ready. You can cut back on that. At home after work is literally your free time. Eating, sleeping, shitting, is your free time. You're using it to eat, sleep and shit. Which I doubt takes a whole day. School and studying are understandable. Doing laundry takes roughly 5 minutes to do. And another 20 to fold, put everything away. You don't shop every day. You don't get gas everyday. Please stop acting like you're using every single second of your 24 hours.

When you get done with school, hit your stride at work, start earning real money, etc., your leisure time will come back. Just grind on for a few more years and all this will pay off.

I work a 4/10 schedule at my job where I am at work from 7:00 to 5:30pm Monday through Thursday. I wake up at 5:00, shower, read, prepare breakfast, and leave by 6:30. I get home around 6:00 pm which gives me the rest of the evening (until around 10:00) to watch tv, go for a hike, play video games, play music, go shooting, hanging out with friends, or do whatever else I want to do. Dinner usually either consists of Huel or eating out, and then I go to bed. Friday’s and Saturday’s are my free days where I can do whatever the whole day, and Sunday’s I go to church, go grocery shopping, do laundry, and clean my apartment.

I think having a schedule that has the perfect mix of strict outline as well as time that doesn’t have something planned is important for being able to do what you want to do

if you don’t do anything, visit your grandma.

I literally don't. I work all day and on my breaks at work I do schoolwork, any school work that doesn't get done gets allocated to the weekend. My commute takes 2 hours a day plus 9.5-10 hours at work. I get home and spend 1-2 hours with my husband. Then get up and do it all over again. On the weekends I volunteer at a hospital, and clean my home and do laundry and get groceries. There's very little time for enjoying life and it sucks.

I wake up early, 5am. I don't leave for work until 8am so I have a solid 3 hours to exercise, read the news, make breakfast, maybe clean up a little, or get some work done before getting into the office. I also live fairly close to work, so my commute isn't that bad, which means I'm home by 6pm, make a quick dinner (or reheat something if I meal-prepped something over the weekend), and then play video games, watch youtube videos, or read. Generally morning is more productive than evening since I generally feel lazy after work and want to rest/recharge.

What you would do if you didn’t have a job or school? Hanging out and enjoying life is not realistic for most of us but it seems common to not know what we want out of life. Instead, we seem to focus on what we don’t want.

Hmm, that's pretty interesting. I always thought that these things of an American life were actually true, but to me they're not, and I wouldn't prefer it the other way.

After graduating from a masters (studying/freelancing/living life during the day time, working as a bouncer at pubs during the nights), I am now working in a rapidly growing startup - typing this at the office at 21:55 UK time now!

What I always say to people, there is no 9 to 5. If you're not in it 24/7, then you're wasting your time and being stagnant.

I love my career, it fulfils everything I want, I get anything I ask for in exchange for my loyalty and crazy resolve to become the best marketer in the world and eventually own my own enterprises with a partner or proxy, assuming the role of a creative director. I want to live in this vision by the time I'm 35 - that's the deadline I've set myself.

The sacrifices I make: 0 time with my family - I moved abroad to study, live alone as a minimalist on a futon, commute to work with a foldable bike rather than a car, work 10-36 hour shifts if necessary, take care of hygiene, self-teaching, exercising, eating, shitting with the rest of my time.

My partner is doing the same, except that her commute is 2 hours to work at a large metropolis.

I have to admit - I am on Sertraline 150mg every day, while my partner breaks down at least once every two weeks and we need to group up online and boost each other up. Why do we grind like crazy? Passion, respect, fulfilment, gratitude to our families, duty, in order to empower ourselves to take care of our parents when they need to be taken care of - they are not getting younger.

From my experience, people who are not living it like this at my age are stagnant, short-sighted, childish, dull. Don't believe the media when it shows you the positive lives of the Jersey Shore-types - most of them are deep into overdraft and will be scraping benefits for their useless kids by the time they are 30.

Now, YOU. Keep doing what you're doing. Our office loves people like you. Don't be sad that you can't go to brunch with Mary Sue - daddy/hubby/state money is behind all of that, so I would advise you to find MORE pride in what you're doing and keep grinding - if anything, skip hygiene for a weekend and work more. Don't be afraid to work harder - your armpits smell like roses compared to the stench of a basic bitch on IG.

And remember, A.B.C.

2 hours prior to work? Wtf. I live 40 mins away and I’m up an hour before

My boyfriend is chef in a restaurant, and he's at work from 9:30am to around 11pm everyday or sometimes even later. He has to arrive at the restaurant 1 hour before opening time, has a short break in the afternoon and stays until midnight. Every week he has only a day off (Monday) and we live in 2 different cities, so we have very little time together :(

I'm a student and have a part-time job, still have some time for myself, but I wonder how it'll be after I graduate and hava full time job.

School plus job is more than a full-time job as others have mentioned. You generally don't have to do anything outside of work if you're working a "normal" full-time job.

Otherwise, the answer for dealing with high stress/busy situations are: slacking on work, substance use (alcohol/pot/tobacco), letting other parts of your life slip (cough cough cleaning), or spending as many non-work hours in recovery mode as possible

Some of these answers are better than others. I also definitely don't recommend substance use - that one only works for so long, and also it's super expensive and hard to back out of. That said, slacking on work punches well above it's weight considering what a bad rap it gets.

It depends on your job. I work full time but it's remotely from home, so I don't have a commute wasting my time. Weekends and holidays are always open. Even nights after work give me enough time to eat a relaxed dinner, watch some TV or even go out sometimes. I do think I was much busier when I was working part time and going to school because my life was split between those two important but very different things.

[removed]

I do computer programming and tech support for a very small software company.

Yeah this is why I've been debating on dropping out of school. I don't want to go to school for 4-8 years to get into a career that will basically be my life until I die.

I'd have to wake up at 6:30-7, drive from 7:20-8:00, work from 8:00-5:00pm, drive again from 5:00-6:00 (because rush hour), cook from 6:00-6:45, eat from 6:45-7:30, wash up/basic maintenance cleaning from 7:30-8:00. That would leave me from 9:00-10:00 free time and then 10:00-11:00 to do my nightly routine. Like literally 1 hour of free time. Now if I multi-task, I can squeeze in an extra 45 minutes there during food to watch tv with the bf or youtube or whatever. And if I stay up late I can do a few other little projects. MOST of the time though, I'm so exhausted after dealing with people all day that I NEED that time to recharge. And all of this is if you can be a super efficient functioning member of society, and I have a hard time with that at my best, much less when I'm dealing with shit.

Basically, I don't want to spend a shitload on an education hating myself for a job I'm not going to enjoy or want to do at the end of the day. My plan right now is go to school and get an associate's in whatever crazy shit I like because free why not, and while I'm at that, build up some freelancing/small business stuff to keep me going so I can enjoy the shit I like doing, (Music, art, writing, etc) and MAYBE one day i'll get super lucky and can make money doing /that/ stuff.

Why the hell does it take you 2 hrs to get ready for work. That’s problem 1.

Don’t have kids.

Pick one day for laundering.

There is plenty time in the day. You need better time management skills.

If you’re working 10am, an 8 hour shift would get you off at 6. If you’re going home from work and eating dinner and sleeping at 9:30 and getting up at 8, your life is going to be boring. People with hobbies make time for their hobbies. They love the gym? They get up a lot earlier than 8. They work earlier than 10? They get off earlier, and there are lots of adult clubs and groups that gather on weekday nights. Even sports. But not just sports.. and they use their two full days off on the weekend to do big things like visit their grandma.

It is difficult to see in the short term however dependent on your circumstance; you gain work experience over the years, get better jobs and can then somewhat dictate on your terms. In your personal life, you must prioritise. No one can do everything and not everyone will be happy with your decisions.

You get used to it. You have to learn to balance everything out around the 49 hour week, or you'll end up stressed, depressed, and miserable. It's a constant balancig act, and no ones perfect - so don't let someone tell you everyone is great at it and there's never going to be stressful moments

You don't have to do this. There's lots of jobs with 12 hour shifts. Work 4 days have 4 days off work 3 days have 3 days off. I love it it's like I get a vacation every weekend. Medical jobs and the semiconductor industry i'm in have shifts like that.

Ah the poverty life.

My sister is coming to the realization like OP has as well. That's why you gotta go to school to get into a job you like or want to learn skills from so you feel like you're at least progressing your life.

Am I a golden person? I wake up, get ready and leave for work (1hr from wake up to arrive at work)

Work 8hrs (I always work through lunch)

30min home then dinner

Help the kiddo with spelling practice, or math, or read a book

Chill out, joint hobbies, play pretend, pick up, take laundry downstairs etc

Kid bed routine

Now I have 3-4 hours (depending on when I get sleepy) to do whatever I want.

If you’re (hypothetical you -not OP in particular) getting 8 solid hours of sleep each night and working 40 hours, there are 72 waking, non-working hours in a week. If you can’t find time for a hobby, you’re doing something wrong. I work as an engineer, my fiancĆ© is an architect. We go to trivia at least one night a week, I play softball and he plays hockey - both 2 nights a week. We go to the gym 6 days a week (that’s a hobby for us as we compete in strength sports). I make it a point to read at least 30 minutes a day, either at lunch or just before bed. I play the piano, my fiancĆ© brews beer. We take our dog to the dog park 3-4 times a week. It’s doable. You just have to be mindful of your time and what you’re doing with it.

OP, you’re in a tough spot because you’re going to school AND working. You have a lot more of your time tied up than if you just had a full-time job. I would say that a 2 hour morning routine is a bit excessive. I’m up and out the door in literally like 10 minutes. Brush hair and teeth, clothes, maybe a bit of mascara and deodorant. I always shower at night so my hair dries while we’re watching TV or whatever.

Oof. I work 70 to 80 hours a week as a dump truck driver hauling asphalt and road millings, supplying quarries etc.

I work to make money, I work so I can retire at 55 with a couple mil in my 401k. I still have plenty of time on the weekends for personal stuff, its all about time management and moderation. Also doesn't hurt that I love what I do.

I find being a minimalist, like never making purchases, so excluding myself from capitalism means that I have more money and therefore need to work less and have enough time for social life and hobbies. Then if I don't have enough to do, I work more.

Yeah, no. now imagine having kids that require all the spare time you have. you need to do everything for them in your spare time eg, cook them dinner, wash their clothes, interact with them, bath them and put them to bed and after you put them to sleep you only have about 1-2h to yourself before you have to go to sleep to get minimum 6-7h rest and then wake you to do it all again because kids wake up early. and you don't get a break untill they are teenagers but by that time they think life is hard and you apparently owe them the world. And they bitch and moan and pester you non stop and finally have kids of their own and say oh my god what have I done.

As a female I can say you'll eventually find ways to make your morning get ready routine faster. I'm in my 30s and none of my friends spend more than 40 mins getting ready. I also only wash my hair 3 times a week so yo do my hair each morning takes only 15 to run a curler through it.

Being a working student will do that. Oh well, that's the life you live for a bit but you're doing it for a reason. After you graduate you will have some more free time.

I've been real busy lately and have hardly been in the house. I leave work at 5.30 which gives me enough time to hang out with friends, record music and do whatever. Obviously some days I have to do chores but I try keep all my chores contained to 1 or 2 days a week.

People think they don't have time but in reality probably get home from work at 6, sit on their phone for 5 hours then go to bed and think "i never have any time to do anything!" The past couple months I've been trying to be constantly doing things and stopping going on my phone so much but you'd be surprised how much you can actually do in a day.

I am a Registered Nurse & I have a great work/life balance. I work three 12 hour shifts per week. True, I don't do much other than work & sleep when I'm on, but I have four days off per week. Sometimes I'm working a ton, other times I'm off for days & days. While nurses can't do this all of the time, we can get up to eight days off in a row without using any vacation time. It's a little give & take though, sometimes I'm working a ton, other times I'm off for a long stretch. Also, I do have to work some weekends & holidays. Some nurses work in positions that are more traditional 9 to 5 jobs, but I wouldn't give up what I do for that. Having said all of that, there's no, "coming in late today, or leaving early," in nursing, & there's no, "let's all go out to lunch somewhere," either. So there's some trade offs, but I love my job & feel fortunate to have it. There are plenty of other jobs out there where you work a concentrated period of time & then have a stretch of time off. Don't forget teachers get summertime off!

Cannot speak for the majority, but I worked 8 hour shifts for three years, times were 3pm to 11pm and that felt alot nicer than the standard 9-5 (which I did for two years), however being a lazy shit I would waste my mornings on Netflix, I've recently moved to a 4 day on, 4 day off rota with 12 hour shifts, the difference is night and day, I focus on work for 4 days and I now have a sleeping pattern, my 4 days off aren't all spent lounging about or doing next to nothing like a normal weekend would be, I am still putting effort in to find a hobby to partake in but no luck so far, best of luck to you in college.

I’m literally in the same boat. I work full time and I’m a senior in high school. I immediately go to work after school get home and have to get ready for the next day. I have no time to have ā€œ funā€ after class and I have to plan out accordingly what I do with my free time. I dont know how real adults do it

So I got to school full time and work full time as well. The secret I have found is working a set schedule and planning things that revolve around that schedule.

I went so long without ever really doing anything but working and going to school, but then I joined a group that plays DnD and cooks out once every other week.

We are looking to join a pub league soccer team this upcoming fall and I just found one that meets on my days off. I sacrifice some sleep in order to be able to do things outside of work and school, but if I didn't have these things to look forward to through the week I would go insane.

The big thing is that even when you graduate and are only working full time, life still takes up so much time that if you don't learn how to fit entertainment into your schedule now, it will only get harder as time goes on. Look for some hobbies or try and find a group that does a hobby you already have.

Sleep 6 hours a day and throw out your television/video games. Not sure that's realistic for everyone, but that's how I do it.

There are convenience services for cleaning, laundry, and groceries to help out.

It's sounds like your are suffering from stress rather than lack of time. Because you say people need to recharge before going to work. I work 5 days about 10 hours with 2 hour commute. I leave at 8am and get home at 8pm. But I will still fill my schedule (chores hobbies and social) from 5pm Friday to Sunday night and still have energy for Monday. It helps a lot that I like my job. You gotta spend less time on things that don't bring value to your life. Work study social life brings value. I know chores don't, but they don't have to be mentally draining. Use that time to relax your mind. Be present. Chores can be calming if you do it with the right mindset. I have free time and you'll find so do you. But difference is I still have mental energy left to use it. It's all in the state of mind. I hope you find peace and with that in more control of time.

It’ll get better once you’re not in college anymore. Honestly I hated my last job, though - one of the reasons being I didn’t have enough work and twiddled my thumbs because I had to be there all day. Thankfully I’ve started my own business. And work in general is better than school because with work, I actually know when I’m done with a task, instead of guilting myself into cramming more facts into my head and seeing what will stick.

I used to work from 4pm to 2am few times a month while the rest of the month from 2pm to 2am. While going to college for few hours a day! Basically had no time to sleep or even eat! So I end up eating only during my work!

You don't. Life is ultimately meaningless and that's my short answer.

Long answer?

We have to work that much for two reasons: to properly live in & pay for this society (which purposely screws people with average paying jobs over) and so other people don't look at us as "lazy losers" ect more trash talk

Do it or you'll regret it or don't do it and you'll probably regret it as well. (it's pretty hard to cheat the system) not everyone gets the opportunity to work from home or have their dream job and be happy and some people who have that are too lost in their own world to realize most people can't live that way/well.

Life isn't fun and life isn't fair. Sure as hell won't be satisfying to die one day knowing that .. was never fulfilled or happy in my life ever just because every job available is barely livable and also takes away 90% of my life.

I'm not even liberal but seriously like fuck the US society.

Two words: sleep deprivation

A little late with my comment but I too had no time for anything when I had a full time and part time job. I can imagine studying takes up a lot of time, but there are things you can do to free up parts of your day.

I took up meal prepping, but only for M-F. I’d cook normal meals the weekend and on Sunday I’d make all 3 meals of the day for the next 5 days. Saved me an incredible amount of time! However, I don’t have a long morning routine as yours as well so I had more time to begin with. Also, my 1 job is thankfully 5 mins away now and I can’t wear makeup there (warehouse type shit).

To add to this, it is possible to take 5 mins showers and find a way to put on makeup quicker as well. When I did shower and put on makeup everyday, I was in and out of the shower within 10 mins, already dressed, and did my makeup for another 10. You could also designate small areas of your house to clean while your food is in the microwave or cooking or whatever.

Good luck to you OP!

I worked a full time job while in college (taking a full course load 15 hours) plus kids and a husband and a side business making/up cycling crafts. It’s hard but somehow it all works out. But then again I’ve never really had many friends and not really much family so don’t have to really find time to visit people. Now I work a day job and a night job plus I coach. So it’s pretty busy but I try not to do both jobs on the same day.

This is why I cheat the livin shit outta my taxes and take as many cash jobs as I can get in my trade.

how are adults who work full time able to have full on lives with unique hobbies

Most can't.

Only those who make enough can.

Most people don't make enough.

I thought I would have more freedom and downtime as an adult...

You would if wages were higher.

Time is money.

If you want more free time, you need more money.

You’ll work it out

Work 84-112 hours a week and you’ll find out how working a 9-5 has all the time in the world.

The best advice I can give is to get a job with the smallest commute possible. Half hour there and a half hour back takes your work day down to 9 or 10 hours. 7 to 8 for sleeping leaves 6 hours a day for everything else, bathing, cooking, hobbies etc. Also try for a 9-5 mon-fri, you have every weekend then for the things you like doing.

I work full time and have hobbies and still go out. When I go out and socialize it would usually be after work once a month. Evey other weekend or once a month my husband and I go out of the city and try something new. Once a year we go on a two week holiday somewhere abroad. After work my husband and i cook for eachother, who ever is not cooking cleans, vacuums or put the load of laundry in. We love lazy weekends being couch potatoes. I love art, so while we watch I also draw. It's doable just little bit of it.

Welcome to the wonderful world of modern slavery.

I ask myself this every day. How do people even raise families?............

Sounds like our moms came from poor conditions but god bless their souls. I dont know how they do it.

" What I don’t get is, how are adults who work full time able to have full on lives with unique hobbies when I can’t even find time to visit my grandma for a day? "

The dirty little secret is they don't. You only really have this kind of free time when you're young and living with your parents (or supported by them), or when you're older and finally making decent money after decades of working your ass off.

There are always exceptions to the rule, but generally this is how it goes. This is why my dad always told me growing up, enjoy being young while you can because once you're an adult it's working to eat and eating to work until you're dead =D

Thanks dad, lol.

Honestly, medication.

Simple answer : You don't.

Wait until you have kids. It never ends.

Sa

We don't. It sucks. Welcome to life.

They don’t. They don’t actually ā€œliveā€, they just work and then work and then break away for ten days of vacation and then back to the cycle. They don’t see their spouses, they don’t see their kids enough. They don’t have time to enjoy days together. I can hardly call it living no matter how much you stretch it. And no amount of ā€œgetting ahead of your scheduleā€ will fix that. Think outside the box man. I quit a senior management position in a giant retailer cause no amount of money is gonna give me time back with husband just going to museums and parks and enjoying life. I now run my own consulting company from my own house. It’s been great.

4cyl 1.4 = 650km

No school

No make up

only clean once to twice a month

grovery when I feel like I need something (eat at work)

2pm-10pm shifts is chill life

no shits givirn

Capitalism is just slavery with extra steps. Most people have maybe 3-4h free time a day. (After Work, commute, grocerie shopping, cleaning - and that is If you are quick) And Most are way to exhausted to do anything meaningfull in those few hours.

I'm Not looking Forward to working after University at all, what Kind of live is that, waiting for the Weekend everyday Just to repeat the Grind on monday

I feel the Most Bad about people working full time in retail, I'd honestly rather kill myself than work in retail full time, part time was already soul crushing

I don't think they do. I'm part time worker, full time college student. I work less than 20 hours a week and take 18 hours a semester. I lost SO MUCH SLEEP trying to game and socialize while doing trig problems. I think after school it gets easier.

And now add some kids to that mix!

You're working full time and at college. You're not gonna have really any free time until you either cut your hours of graduate.

Sorry but you sort of should've seem that coming. Just one of those things takes up lots of time.

Lol welcome to adulthood.

Have been working full time(40+hrs) a week, as well as doing side work while finishing up my bachelors with a double minor in a very involved program. It absolutely sucks but you learn so many life skills while doing it such as time management, financial independence, and the value of family and friends. I still find time to carry on a slightly normal social life, help my folks on the weekends, and not miss out on too many things. If you get a job in your degree prior to graduation your wages will generally be higher and you'll have a major advantage over similar graduates with the years of work experience. It can be rough and stressful but I would do it exactly the same given the opportunity to do it over.

Edit: I was working 80+ hrs a week before going back to school, realized it wasnt how I wanted to live the rest of my life. It helps having a close friend group and partner that are also extremely driven and support you. My gf just finished her RN while working 2 jobs, we dont see each other nearly as much as we like even with living together but we know it's going to pay off when we are both done.

I feel you. I’ve dropped down to part time work whilst doing my masters full time. I work 3 days a week and am on campus 2 days and in the evenings after work. I spend my weekend working on assignments because I always have one due at some point or another. I also feel I don’t have much time to even stressfully watch Netflix. I also have quite a few hobbies but currently don’t have time for them. Working and studying is tough and sometimes I question if it’s even worth it.

I'm hoping to find out the secret to this but if you find out first please tell me

I work 50-55 hours a week on average. I still have time to do pretty much everything i want. I have a friend that has a similar schedule as you. She loses most of her time in the preparation for two different things. Once you only have one thing taking up most of your time its not that bad. Also commuting can really mess up your free time.

Wow, I’d love to have that schedule OP! Wait until you throw kids in the mix. I have two. Between their school, dr and dentist appointments, piano, baseball, dance, church, etc it takes up a ton of time. I’m a homeowner, so add in home repairs, lawn care, etc. doing laundry for 4 stinks, as does planning daily meals, clean up, etc.

We own a business too, so that is also a daily issue, whether ordering inventory, dealing with an employee, working the store, etc.

Hate to be a fun sucker OP, but it only gets worse.

You don't šŸ˜‚ been a adult sucks

I know the feeling. The monotonous cycle of full time work>school>sleep: repeat. Usually weekends are spent doing homework and just wanting to relax, but like, use any free time you can to spend with friends. It keeps your mind off the suck of life. Most days will be done before you feel you could really do anything meaningful, but even the smallest thing like just going out to grab a quick bite can make a huge difference between wanting to breakdown and knowing it's only temporary.

You don't. The fact that you even have time off from working at all is just so you can physically recharge to keep working more. It's also to extract your money over the weekends on stuff you buy to distract yourself from your enslavement.

You think it's bad now. You didn't even mention a family and kids. Welcome to the modern slavery system that was never abolished. It was just expanded to include all races.

2/3 of your life is already deleted from sleeping and work. The stats show also by the time you retire in your late 60's that you'll have some form of impairment.

It's even worse when you know about the biggest fraud in the history of mankind.

[removed]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iFDe5kUUyT0&list=PLcbNLE8mhX0_Y4mGU3zEUWUKV-7rkR8lb

You have 24 hours a day. 8 hours sleep, 8 hours work, 8 hours to do whatever you want.

Lol add kids to the mix and then we’ll talk.

Sleep less. I’m tired all the time, but I get to do more stuff.

[deleted]

Lol this is actually the best real world advice. The fundamental problem is that we cannot create more hours in a day. 24 hours, that's all you get. Assuming your work hours are fixed at 10 hours ( 8 hour work day, 1 hour lunch, 1 hour commute/getting ready for work), that leaves you with 14 hours. Sleep is important for sure, but it can definitely be manipulated to get the most out of life with minimal negative repercussion. Look at new parents for example. They go from sleeping 8 hours a day to like 4 when raising kids. Humans seem to have been reproducing just fine for the last million years or so :-)

Can’t put more hours into the day, gotta maximize productivity somehow. I’d rather sleep for 5 hours instead of 8 of it means I get to do something I enjoy for a little bit longer.

Wait till you buy a house in the suburbs and have kids. No time for anything.

dont have kids then. also you shouldnt tell people ā€œwait till you have kidsā€ you shouldnt assume everyone wants kids

Oh do fuck off mate.
You’ve managed to both miss my point and be a knuckle head about it.

[deleted]

Dude you really suck. Like, you realllllly suck.

Glad the rational adults here are the ones raising children.

[deleted]

Lol lol lol

[deleted]

Nah man just here to laugh at the shit you say. Carry on with your bitching

All we ever do is talk about ourselves.

[deleted]

You’re a massive dickhead. I bet you’re fun at parties. Everyone just standing around having a chat, then you chime in being a useless cunt.

hah, he said something I don't like, let's condescendingly reply!!1!!

Hey Lord YoUaReSoHiLaRiOuS. I think you're on the wrong website. Reddit is an entertainment site, what were you expecting?

People ain't gonna stop these jokes cause a bot told 'em to. Please stop spreading hate.
This is a bot. Beep boop.

Such a funny comment. r/unexpectedhilarity. [If you wish to ban this bot, please instead ban /u/YoUaReSoHiLaRiOuS. It will ban this bot and another spambot in one go.]


^(I am a bot. If this post was made by accident, please tell u/ Omegas_Bane. This is version 0.07 of Incredibly_Hilarious. For suggestions, go to r/unexpectedhilarity. YoUaReSoHiLaRiOuS flavour.)

His comment is not condescending. It just tells people that they should have fun instead of ruining it. You should try some.

I am a bot made to track this bot and reply to it. If I misinterpreted the context, please inform me.

The perils of a capatalist society.

It's spelled capatalast.

Beats the shit out of society ruled by a dictator or a king. Also beats the shit out of having things handed to you that you didn’t earn.

Yes, beats the shit, quite literally, since noone has time to dedicate to their own lives. The fact that it's better than previous sytems doesn't mean it's the best that we can achieve as a civilisation.

No that's life under capitalist slavery. Become a far leftist, protest, don't support capitalism it's a bullshit lie.

Found the guy who still lives with their parents

Not a guy, not living with my parents. Your insight has me in awe.

How good does that boot taste?

Better than poverty.

At least you admit you're a shit head. Kudos.

I work the standard 9-5. Wake up at 8, leave at 830, home at 6-7, in bed at 11-12. So on weekdays I get about 4 hours of time to myself. No kids. Honestly, I'm not a super eventful person, so I don't have a bunch of hobbies or go out with friends a lot. Some days I don't feel like I have enough free time but most days I feel like it's enough to be productive and do what I want to do without feeling bored. I'm not sure if that just a mindset thing because I got used to working but when I was back in uni and had a lot of free time (I didn't work, went to class 2 days a week) I just wasted a lot of that time. Sure, it was enjoyable and relaxed but I was mostly bored, sleeping a lot, and finding stuff to do to fill my time.

Basically, I still have time to do important/meaningful things but just less time to waste doing stupid stuff.

I learned to function 100% off 6 hours sleep each night.

i don't sleep much. will probably die Young

You’re supposed to do something you enjoy... so as to not consider it ā€˜work’.

Otherwise, you fucked up life bruh.

I don't understand makeup, such a time consuming task...

And wait until you have kids, mine is 2yo and I haven't know what free time is since he made 1yo, looks like it'll only get worse.

Short answer - sleep less. You can end up woth 4x7 ish easielly 30 hours extra time a week.

It sucks but you can manage. I get up at 530, shower/do makeup/get dressed, get to work by 830, work till 5, get home at 6. I spend the rest of the night with my partner, maybe make a fast dinner. Watch some shows, play some games. Stay up till midnight and crash. Sometimes stay out late and go to a show and just load up on caffeine the next day.

Fridays 6pm to Sundays midnight I spend all of my time partying, attending events, going on dates with my partner or my other two girlfriends, and doing chores.

You really have to be efficient with your free time if you want to have a life. I felt like you until I graduated last September and things really freed up but you have to make the time yourself.

Also it really depends on the type of person you are. Some weekends I need to relax but other weekends I am hardly home, attending parties almost every day.

Sleep is something you can lose

Patience Grasshopper Patience šŸ˜ŠšŸ™ƒ It will all come together in due time. Relax you can do this šŸ‘

Capitalism is a real problem.

You're not too busy to do things you like.

What's worse is that it's unnecessary.

If our winner take all economic system wasn't designed to keep most people impoverished and enslaved for the benefit of kleptocrats, we could all easily have a three day weekend every weekend, at the very least.

We are slaves to the State, your life doesn't belong to you. Good luck though

No excuses

It gets easier once you turn 30. Trust me.

Why the downvotes tho?

[removed]

Sorry to hear that. Ofc I dont know you situation, but it'll only be a few years until you're done paying for it. Stay strong my friend.

The tricks are...

Short commute - I am around 15 mins from work. So 30 mins a day travel isn't too bad, if you are an hour away, that's going to eat in massively.

Short prep time - I'm up at 7.40 and gone by 8.00. Shower, clothes, leave.

Don't play video games - A massive time sink, single levels can take hours. Get a hobby that's healthier and more physically rewarding. 30 minutes on video games can go by in a second, 30 minutes running feels like an eternity.

Have a partner - If you are married, have gf/bf etc you can cut your workload in half. Half as much cleaning, half as much cooking etc. Or do it together and enjoy the time and treat it as leisure. Cooking for yourself to fend off starvation is shit, cooking together is fun and creative.

Learn to Sleep - I don't do this, but there are ways to train yourself to get to sleep quicker, and have more restful sleep. 8 hours of restlessness is a massive waste of time when you can replace it with 5-6 hours of good quality restful sleep.

Learn to enjoy all your time - Don't think of your commute as a waste, listen to music or podcasts. Try and enjoy cooking and eating. I have kids so I spend a massive amount of time playing with them, reading, talking etc. Some people might consider these chores but they aren't chores, they are life. Enjoy it, all of it.

this is why i quit my job. i’ll figure something out. FUCK SLAVERY.

Toughen up buttercup. That’s life.

Also, if you’re watching everyone else’s life through social media (ie Instagram), don’t believe it.

It’s odd to me that it’s ā€œjust lifeā€ though. I know it’s what needs to happen to keep yourself and society afloat, but it seems weird that most people are sacrificing a lot of time and labor and getting little personal freedom in return.

Personal freedom does not equal leisure time. You’re falsely conflating those two things. You are correct though that many people feel life is a treadmill they wish they could get off of.

I do not feel this way because I am in a job/career that I really enjoy. If I had to work full time in retail or in a call centre or any other job I personally consider boring then I would hate life too. Instead I consider my work hours to be very enjoyable and stimulating, and I’m around interesting people all day with a lot of flexibility of choice in what to focus on each day.

I don’t go out much and don’t have many hobbies but I manage to do things I’m interested in on the weekends. I think 48 hours is quite a lot of time to enjoy.

Honestly I think you feel this way because you don’t like your job and you’re studying. Studying while working full time is an absolute bitch.

This guy nailed it about the enjoyable job part. Working fast food and retail was soul crushing. Even working part time while I was finishing up my degree was rough. Now that I'm a few years into a career I really enjoy, working for a great company with people I don't wanna punch in the throat, it's a hell of a lot better. And you'll be surprised how much time you'll free up not having to deal with school.

Yes, that idea is pointless but incredibly pervasive. I can't imagine how anyone thinks it's fine. This is more effort than anyone probably cares about but I just want to draw a picture

The end-product of civilization and wealth: fur coats, deliveries the next day in time for gifting, video games, cinema and popcorn flavoring and so on is to improve our quality of life, yes? You might say "no ouen, it's just a facade for profit, happiness doesn't matter, the end product is only money" then what is money for? Tokens to make life better? No matter how you slice it, there's no good argument to accept that people will always be miserable. If we should expect it to be shit, why is any civilization in place if it's just a different outfit for people to destroy themselves dusk to dawn to survive?

I think people are pushed far too hard for such a system to even do what it seems to be built for. Yes, you could argue that we worked far harder centuries ago to survive, and I'm not saying modern life isn't better but the average person likely didn't think about existential quandaries or hope for new technologies or political changes. I don't think there were hopes to crush or any thinking that there was a much different way to exist. They wanted the basics like us, but there was no "rich, easy life cruising in Lamborghinis" to keep pushing harder for

We grow up hoping for a good quality of life and pursuing education, friends, new experiences, traveling to other countries, seeking purpose, buying a nice home, a nice car and so on. There are experiences and sensations we can now see besides survival, but all we can do is tiptoe and look over the wall to see things that we can keep jumping and struggling for but never reach. And when we try, jerks like this punch us and say "you're not allowed to want that?" Why does any of it exist then??

Modern society is there to make life better, but it builds dreams that it itself crushes due to the devaluation of employees and prioritizing wealth over its constituents' well-being (which, again, is what money promises but expectations are so high it's hard to live without being very stressed). Again, I am not saying life is not easier than prehistory. It is. The point is there are things, marketers and PR teasing us with the hope of not suffering, while we are chained to it because other people willingly engage that chain and hold the key. We get frustrated because employers are unspokenly told to not afford employees an existence where a majority of time can be spent not suffering. Squeeze as much money and utility out of them as you can.

Step 1 to fixing this is thinking "It's okay that my food or delivery was a little slow, maybe they're stressed or made a mistake like I often do." instead of complaining to management"this person needs to be pushed even more to the brink" Empathy alleviates so much suffering while selfishness, defeatism and money-worship perpetuate it

Come back to me when you have kids

[deleted]

[deleted]

Look at this guy's posts. all he does is stalk peoples profiles. EWWWW CREEPER!!!!

He also creates alts to agree with himself. It's funny AF

[deleted]

So you admit it? Nice