Someone's lost their way to r/shittycoolguides
Someone's lost their way to r/shittycoolguides
Thanks so much for the introduction to that sub.
It's honestly better than this one.
Thought they were the same.
There's a book called how to give a crocodile a bath that is just that sub
what a great sub profile picture
This is grounded in reality as much as some other, highly upvoted posts on this sub.
Great now we need another cool guide to show how to deploy anti-cowboy measures.
Here is a video explaining the anti-cowboy measures: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zkzWyOaS8kU
The finest expert in the field.
I was expecting a rickroll, thank you for it not being one
Fuckin get their ass with the FACTASAURUSES
I thought anti-cowboy measures was just sobriety.
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Just say, "Git along, little dogie" and that should do the trick.
Also one for in case you wake up to a clown or a dinosaur.
Don’t you call Jeff gold bloom for both?
summon an eagle, a giant, and a football team with a questionable name to scare it away
Tactical anti-cowboy carpet bombing runs
Really? And what's next, a cool guide about how to breath?
[deleted]
lmfao, I love mods
What does this have to do with this post?
The fact this is not a flow chart makes me irrationally angry.
Your first wrong expectation was /r/CoolGuides having real guides
/r/surrealmemes is leaking
Finally something useful on r/coolguides! /s
This sub is so useless now i swear lol, theres zero moderation
Ikr, one of the rules is quite literally "Non-serious/comedy guides will be removed" haha
The problem is that moderating what is cool is inherently uncool, so mods keep having to delete themselves.
Cowboy mods.
Time for Step Six.
r/imsorandom
So this just another meme sub now?
Well guess it's time to unsubscribe
Mods? Do you even exist?
Why sleeping guy is hitler?
Not many people know that Hitler was often plagued with Sleepingcowboyitis. It was one of the things that fueled his insatiable addiction to yodeling.
I love Reddit.
I thought this sub was supposed to be informational?
you are saying this post isnt informational? Ive always wondered what to do when a cowboy is in my room at 3am
Get this shit outta here
Step seven; drink some sugary tea and wait for the mushrooms to wear off.
Is the antu-cowboy measure asking them to hold a football and get it into the endzone?
When I was 8 or so, I woke up in the middle of the night and there was a man in cowboy attire standing next to my bed. I pulled the blankets over my head and when I peeked he was gone. My room was well-lit (fell asleep with my lamp on) and I saw him clearly.
Ghost? Hallucination? Overly active imagination? Who knows. Every time I see this floating around I regret not asking if it was cowboy times.
This is fucking stupid.
To be fair. These are good instructions. I feel as if deploying the anti-cowboy measures prior to going through the previous steps would lead to a bad, or a bummer, time.
What stoned genius came up with this
I was kinda hoping this would just be a guide for anti-cowboy measures....
Thanks, this happens every Wednesday night. I’ll try this tonight
This shows One of my favorite things about life; there is so much to learn! What do I do if the only way we can find his horse (named “horse”, not Rex, but it still doesn’t happen very often), is if I give him all my bank account information? Asking for a friend, but would still like a quick answer.
This could fit right in at r/nosleep Creepy cowboy showing up in the middle of the night, a bunch of rules? No thanks
Why the “they?” A cowboy is clearly male.
This is why I couldn't live without internet
Oof wrong sub!
It’s a guide.. and it’s cool…
Rule 3: Non-serious/comedy guides
This sub is so shit. Down vote me all you want.
This room is not big enough for both of us
r/lostredditors
Read the rules idiot
Bruh I had to increase my render distance and still couldn't see who asked
I asked now fuck off
Did I ask you if you asked? Cuz I know I sure as hell didn't
I actually laughed out loud at this
Glad someone has the ability to laugh here
Calm down
~ holds up spork ~
Don’t worry guys. He’s just there to tell you that you should be wearing something warm. Even if you’re in the heat of a swamp. You’re gonna catch a cold wearing that, Arthur.
Is this finally the day the mods shut down the sub?
One of my favorites. I love the insane mind that dreamed this shit up.
This is why I stay awake until 3:01am.
This is some “Draw the rest of the owl” bullshit
Am I the only one who's wondering what is/are "anti cowboy measures"?
[deleted]
Posts like there are always made about a week after I would have found them useful
BUT WHAT ARE ANTI COWBOY MEASURES!?!?!?
Tuberculosis
Cholera
Step seven: pass the whiskey
Oh thank god, I’m not the only one this happens to.
Printing this out and sticking in my wallet!
Instructions unclear, we fell in love😩
Terrible absolutely terrible
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Haha so random lol XD
[removed]
What if said cowboy was Sam Elliott?
This happened once in one of my lucid dreams and DAMN it was so fun trying to get Rex
It's always cowboy times.
Now this is a guide!
Wow, you can really post any bullshit you want in this sub, can’t you? Do people never read the rules? Do mods just not do their jobs?
Cool: yes
Guide: yes
Can we please stop spamming memes here? I love this meme but it doesn’t fuckin belong here
Oh I just time traveled.. back to bed! WHAT?
STEP ZERO: Eat entire bag of shrooms. Do not stop at 1 cap.
Why would you go to bed after eating shrooms? Kinda like buying something on ppv then going out to dinner.
There is no bed. That kid is laying in the woods covered in leaves.
I love the contrast between pedantically specific (step 3) and hilariously vague / open-ended (step 6).
[deleted]
It’s 2021. Talk like it.
Can you just skip all the steps and shoot the creep that broke into your bedroom?
I am thinking that if you waste time on all the other steps first you might not have the chance to deploy anti-cowboy measures.
Seriously if think you can beat up a cowboy before getting shot I have my doubts.
This is why you keep a Big Iron(tm) under your pillow.
Bad Cowboys must be kept at bay at any and all costs.
What if the horse is called Raul?
Refer to Step 6
I see
Gayyyy
If only I could have seen this last week, would’ve saved me a lot of trouble.
That cowboy could be there to fight goddamn vampires and Frankensteins
This the funniest thing I've read in a while lol. I can't stop laughing.
Dammit, why didn't I have this yesterday?
What are the anti cowboy measures...
WHAT ARE THE ANTI COWVOY MEASURES?!?!
Thanks. This has happened so many times and I never knew what to do.
Grant you mercy. This hast hath happened so many times and i nev'r kneweth what to doth
^(I am a bot and I swapp'd some of thy words with Shakespeare words.)
Commands: !ShakespeareInsult, !fordo, !optout
Jump on his back and holler “giddy yup”
This is the content I'm here for, I just didn't know it
When do you make the hole in the ground?
Dalton Wilcox is the best damned cowboy poet laureate in the west
What's up hotdog?
Oh boy. I belly laughed at this.
This is like going up to a plumber and asking him "is this the Age of the Plumber?"
Stuka deployed
Anti cowboy.
Its time brokeback that cowboy
On it.
Tell them that my moms room is down the hall. This mix up happens often at my house.
Ask him if he needs directions to broke back mountain
The person who posted this, r/madlad
Where was this guide 3 nights ago...
Note: Please consult the How to Deploy Anti-Cowboy Measures If You Wake Up at 3am and There's a Cowboy Standing in Your Room handbook.
Robot cowboy
That’s believable!
…next time?
Getting some r/comedybangbang vibes here.
Where’s that Dalton Wilcox at?
I need more golden shit like this
[removed]
McSweeney's vibe
This happens all the time at Ram Ranch
is this Married To The Sea?
I might go a bit brokeback mountain is that ok?
Written & Directed by David Lynch
Wish you would have posted this last week.
I get mild hallucinations when waking up suddenly (sometimes). Mostly they're innocuous, very seldomly scary.
This however absolutely seems like something I'd see/hear while in the midst of one of my hypnopompic hallucinations.
Step 7: Profit
Show me on this doll where did the cowboy touch you boy
This reads like those "if you give a mouse a cookie" books...
STEP SEVEN: Figure out what the hell you’ve been smoking.
Anti cowboy measures in my head means I need to get a pirate.
This is great
Start with step 6. Got it.
Shoot armed home invader repeatedly with pillow gun.
This isn't even a guide anymore. Just some meme
Someone doesn't get the concept of steps.
They're not even real steps unless they're accompanied by the jingle jangle of spurs.
I got spurs that jingle, jangle, jingle... as I go riding merrily along!
This gave me New Vegas flashbacks...
Yes...AND where is the profit step? We need a "profit???" step. I feel like even the jingly jangly of spurs steps had profit amongst their airs.
if you don't hear the jingle jangle of spurs that means it's most likely a ghost cowboy.
STEP ONE: Learn about steps
STEP TWO: You are done
STEP THREE: What are you still doing here?
STEP FOUR: It seems it didn't take. Go back to step one.
That was fun
STEP ONE: That's good.
STEP TWO: You're doing it!
STEP THREE: You got this!
STEP FOUR: Almost out the door.
STEP FIVE: Goodbye.
Agree
This is a fake guide written by Big Cowboy! The real way to stop a cowboy is to put a football in his hands
They stopped at 6 when #6 should have been like #3 on the list
Is that a faux pas?