ELI5 Why does ranch dressing at a restaurant always taste better than ranch you buy at the store?
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r/explainlikeimfiveu/rustywolf843 (8438)

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Chef here. Too lazy to convert. -4 dry Hidden Valley ranch packets -3 1/2 gallons buttermilk -2 Gallons mayo -1 5lb tub sour cream

Run a largish catering facility kitchen and restaurant, guests drink this stuff by the glass it seems.

Also chef here. Stop giving out the secrets. I work in an area where if people realized they could make ranch like we do I would be out of business.

(for home use its 2 small packs ranch, smallish tub of sour cream, 2 cups mayo and roughly a cup of buttermilk. If it's too thick add more. Too thin add a bit of sour cream)

Edit: lol of course I get gold for the ranch recipe.

Listen I'm too lazy to make myself a sandwich I'm definitely not making my own ranch. On a side note hot damn that's a lot of mayo!

I can't seem to escape mayo. I'm trying to find a suitable substitute

You must not of had Dukes yet or else you wouldn't be trying to find a replacement

Veganase, it is amazing. I’m not vegan and I love the shit out of veganase. You can find it in the vegan section of most grocery stores. It is not super healthy, but way better for you than mayo.

. It is not super healthy, but way better for you than mayo.

That is really a very low bar to try to meet

This, for real

My girlfriend went through a vegan phase, and this stuff is fucking amazing, honestly like mayonnaise but without the bitter proteiny aftertaste, I like it way better

Avocado. It's nature's mayo. I even use it when I make tuna salad. The only times mayo is better is on meatloaf sammiches and when making grilled cheese.

You're welcome.

Do you make tuna salad in a single serving immediately before consuming it on the one magical day your avocado is ripe?

Make, yes. Gotta be ready on the exact hour that bastard is good. Consume, no. A layer of plastic wrap in contact with the surface keeps it green.

I think if you replace Mayo in ranch with avocado, it becomes a whole new thing

I think you spelled "delicious" wrong.

Not sure if this is what you are after, but I love Just Mayo. They also have Chipotle, Sriracha, garlic, truffle and awesome sauce flavors. As well as Just Ranch and other dressings. They are vegan but I think they taste better and are more healthy than regular stuff.

soy sauce nibba

Mayo is the lube of your soul.

Mayo is your normal lube cause you're dirt cheap

It's easier than making a sandwich though!

Ow, my arteries.

Edit: Holy crap my inbox. I love you all, but please stop PMing me to tell me fat doesn’t hurt your arteries. It was a generic three word comment for humor, not a medical dissertation. :p

Oh it's definitely not good for you. If you are using the heavy duty restaurant style mayo it's even better/worse depending on how you lean.

Also: you can buy the stuff at your local restaurant supply store. They also tend to have really good bulk prices on all sorts of shit you would never expect. Need cases of candy bars? Covered. 100 kilos of frozen breaded calamari? Done. 3 gallon Jerry cans of olive oil? How many you need? Do yourselves a favor and check it out

My dad gets chicken fried steaks and fries and other shit like this nonstop cause we bought him a fryer and we have no idea how he has a clean bill of health.

I totally get it. If someone gave me a deep fryer, I'd never stop eating fries and chicken strips.

i live in a place with a deep fryer and regular restocking of frozen deep fry-able goodies. you get accustomed to it after a year or two

If you try hard enough, anything is deep fry-able.

i promise that I’ve deep fried anything you can think of. twice, with some extra sides too.

I've got nipples, Greg. Can you fry me?

Treat yourself someday to a breaded burger...then bread and fry the bacon you put on it.

You're all very welcome.

Im 34 and was of decent health, before reading this gave me a blocked artery.

https://www.seattlemet.com/articles/2012/1/26/katsu-burger-mt-fuji-mega-burger-february-2012

That's the 3rd time, today, that I've found out the Japanese beat me to an idea.

They don't batter and deep fry the bacon though.

I deep fry my hotdogs fairly often. That’s about as crazy as I get with it.

Have you done a Scottish deep fried pizza?

Yessir, i live with 20+ other guys who also love frying random shit, that was a good day

Have you ever made a full lamb Sunday dinner chimichanga? I have I died or heart disease immediately after finishing it.

Ever seen deep fried masters on Netflix?

No, but I think I'm about to...

Edit: Or not, doesn't look like it is still available - at least in the US (which I would expect to be the largest market for a show with that name).

Homer-“Ha! And you said they couldn’t deep fry my shirt.”

Marge-“I didn’t say they couldn’t, I said you shouldn’t”

The day I learned that Deep Fried Ice Cream is a thing, I gave up. You can deep fry anything.

And now I've got my weekend plans set.

But have you had deep fried beer on a stick?

The Wisconsin State Fair doesn't fuck around

With a side of cheese curds?

And a beer that hasn't been deep fried to wash it down?

Deep fried white cheddar cheese curds thank you very much.

And the beer better be New Glarus.

😂

Great if you coat it in desicated coconut with pandan toffee sauce.

"It's my party and I'll fry if I want to!"

Deep fried salad?

Even dead memes

Optimus Prime?

I've deep fried pizza rolls, pierogis, burgers, oreos,etc. You don't even have to try that hard.

In The Netherlands where the diet has a lot of fried fish and potatoes, all families have a fryer. The reason is that frying with fresh oil is healthy but restaurant vats that have been smoking all day give off carcinogens

I have a deep fryer and the massive downside is that your entire place will smell of deep fried food.

So what is the down side?

that you will walk around smelling like deep fried food no matter where you go. seriously, the smell gets everywhere.

This is precisely why I have not bought a deep fryer and have refused all offers of one as a gift. Deep fryers make frying way too convenient. I currently don't fry food often because it's inconvenient to fill a pan with oil and stand at the stove watching the food while it fries in small batches. If I had a deep fryer, I'd be frying stuff all the time.

home deep fryers aren't really convenient at all actually. They are messy and shitty and rarely hold proper temperature. I have one and it gets used about as much as the waffle maker.

You're probably right. I have a waffle maker that I used all the time when I first got it, but eventually the novelty wore off and I use it a few times a year now.

I borrowed a home deep fryer from a friend once. Maybe it was a combination of the novelty and knowing that I had to give it back, but while I had it, I fried everything I could possibly think of.

I worked in my school lunch room Senior year (school tradition) and had an understanding with our class sponsors that, due to my family's financial situation, I could sample food for "quality assurance" during my shift (it was just me and 2 others in there cooking so it was easy to be discrete I wasn't paying, though I did eventually suck up my pride and tell them because we were all friends) and take as many leftovers as I could carry at the end of the day if there was any left.

I pretty much lived on chicken tenders, french fries, and corn dogs for a school year, can confirm that as an 18 year old it was great. As a 29 year old now, would probably still be great lol. Was also a lot easier for my parents since they only had to worry about lunch for my sister come grocery day - they'd just stock me up on sunflower seeds for snacking and I'd be set til dinner between that and QA.

I have an air fryer. Seems to work pretty similar.

Try an air fryer. It's a game changer for sure.

Good lord if I had a deep fryer I’d put on 80 pounds

Have a deep fryer. I haven't stopped eating chicken strips. Am lean. 6 foot 2. 175 lbs. My wife thinks I'm sexy. but wants me to eat more veggies.

Grand mother was told in 2012 that she had now reached a critical point in her kidney failure. She was at 19.5% and was told that she will most likelly need dialysis or she have less than 6 months to live. She also need to avoid fat and specially salt.

Breakfest: 2 toasts with cretons

Dinner: something fried, chicken nuggets, fried fish or something simmilar. She would add chicken base (as in what you use for soup) on the potatoes and other stuff.

Supper: toasts with strawberry jam.

She passed away 2 months ago because she immune system collapsed, the doctor couln't find where the bacteria/infection was, even after a full body scan... She was 94. And still was at 16-17% for the kidney, even with all that fat and salt and sugar, and basically had a clean bill of health!

For some, their body is quite better than others for junk food...

God that’s almost exactly how my grandmother eats. Why do old ladies revert into this childlike way of only wanting to eat jam and toast and fried white meats, it’s so strange to me. Perhaps we are spoiled with all of the kinds of food available to us now, they grew up in much simpler culinary times.

Well the older you are the more likely every meal is to be your last. Might as well enjoy it.

I think your taste buds deteriorate, and those are flavors you can taste no matter what. Plus those foods are easy to chew.

Plug your nose and have a meal. The nursing home I worked at had us kitchen staff do that to approximate what it's like when you're losing your sense of taste. Helped us understand and emphasize with their preferences!

But honestly those little packets of jelly gross me out and I still don't truly understand how they're enjoyable, bleh

I have tried eating with my nose plugged and can't tell a difference.

I am curious what other people are experiencing that I am missing out on with my crappy sense of smell.

This would be interesting to experiment with! Have you tried plugging your nose and eating a variety of foods? What about first eating something with your nose plugged, and then unplugged, in case your "taste memory" is strong (if that's even a thing).
This could be fun at family dinners or lunch with friends... Get everyone to try it and describe how it affects them!

This would be interesting to experiment with! Have you tried plugging your nose and eating a variety of foods? What about first eating something with your nose plugged, and then unplugged, in case your "taste memory" is strong (if that's even a thing).
This could be fun at family dinners or lunch with friends... Get everyone to try it and describe how it affects them!

It's been a while since I tried it, so maybe I should give it another go. But I did it with a number of different foods with different types of flavors and think I started with my nose plugged.

I think my sense of smell just isn't that impactful for me.

That thing people always say about smell being the strongest trigger for a memory... I have never once smelled something and had it trigger any deeper memory than "oh yeah I guess that's what that thing I am smelling smells like".

Or people talk about smells that make them think of people or places or events or whatever... I've never been able to wrap my mind around it.

I do smell things... Just apparently not enough for it to impact my taste or memories...

Fascinating! I just a thread (on askreddit, maybe?) about medical stuff that people didn't realise wasn't "normal" and there were a number of people talking about not having a good sense of smell. Someone said something about being able to recognize scents just fine, but not having the sort of reactions/associations that most other people seem to have. Sorry to be vague, I'll have a look around and see if I can find it!

Edit: tadaaaa

As you age, you lose your ability to taste. So they tend to eat what is super tasty. Fat tend to enhance the flavor. Salt and sugar is also quite strong in taste. So they ends up with fat/sweet/salty food, which is ofcourse junk food...

My 92 year old grandmother eats little porridge in the morning and little soup at day. Most of her calories come form chocolate bars and cake.

Well, I mean she was 94... More power to her really.

My diet was horrible for years. Fast food. Fried food. Absolute garbage.

Perfect health.

My dad is the same way. Absolutely terrible diet and completely clean bill of health.

It's crazy how much of life is random genetics. Some people can treat their body like shit and they'll live til late 90s, mind still active, doing whatever they want. Others just die cause they ate a peanut at 25.

Freaks me out if I think about it too much.

For the last maybe 50 years of her life, my grandmother survived on trans fats, sugar and card games with friends. She died in her sleep at 93 after a short period of illness. I hope I have her genes.

What weird part of the country do you live in that considers dinner and supper two separate meals?

It's a Gallicism. In French, lunch is 'diner', so when a native French speaker is speaking English as a second language, it's a common enough transposition.

The other clue is that OP referred to cretons, which is a very popular spread in Quebec.

Ahhhhh, missed the second clue.

Definitely seems like a Quebecker, I’d say like 95% chance.

I have no idea what a creton is, but have known many people in Oklahoma and Texas that referred to lunch as dinner but also knew some people in the same region that refer to the evening meal as dinner and never really pinpointed a logical division between who used which terms.

Lunch is dĂŠjeuner. Dinner is dĂŽner Breakfast is petit-dĂŠjeuner

Hein. J'ai plein des collègues qui appellent le repas du soir le souper, et le repas au midi le dÎner. Variation rÊgionale, peut être ?

Peut être entre le QuÊbÊcois et le français en France? J'ai appris le français en France seulement

Pretty common in at least parts of Oklahoma and Texas to refer to lunch as dinner but supper is always the evening meal afaik.

It’s because fat isn’t bad for you.

Enjoy your ranch. Just take it easy in the sugars and starches.

[deleted]

Well you need lipids just like you need proteins.

It's the quantity that matters. To say "Fat is 100% bad" makes me think I should only drink protien shakes the rest of my life.

Fats are bad carbs are worse... Yeah I guess protein is basically the only thing left. Just make sure you source it from a sustainable plant based non-gmo organic food product.

You are scientrist, no?

Hey the 80s is over man, nutrition has advanced quite a bit

Yup, both both carbs and fat are bad for you in excessive amounts. We could do the whole dance of trying to figure out whats worse, depending on context, but lets just keep it civil and not do too much of either?

Literally everything is bad for you in excessive amounts, that’s basically the definition of excessive.

I like to play it safe. Cut back on all carbs, hit however much protein you need to not lose muscle, eat the not awful fat (trans I think? Fake trans, that is).

People can eat whatever they want to be healthy/lose weight for all I care, but carbs are still a useless energy source (except for athletes arguably) and should at the very least be watched.

Man, nutrition is weird and complicated.

Useless? Not really. There is a pretty huge divide between say...sugar sweetened soda and a carrot, so saying that they are equally bad is not a particularly smart way to organize your diet.

If you only eat protein and healthy fats, you are going to miss out on a fair bit of water-soluble vitamins, minerals, fibre, antioxidants and a lot of other phytonutrients. Not to mention that only eating meat and fat will be pretty expensive in the long run, and increase your risk of developing colorectal cancer.

/nutrition student.

You need to do some reading.

Not that one person‘s personal story makes scientific fact, but I have been on a very low carb, very high fat diet for two years now, and just had my blood work done. My doctor is amazed and says keep doing whatever you were doing. There are thousands and thousands of incredible cases that prove the opposite of what you are saying.

Trans fats are absolutely bad for you. Nobody would argue that. But unless you’re eating absolute garbage, it’s actually pretty hard to find trans fats these days, thankfully.

He almost certainly does not have a clean bill of health if he is eating it often.

If you are using the heavy duty restaurant style mayo

I'll never forget the first time I reached my arm into a large cardboard box of mayo

that smell is really something, isn't it?

You're that cosmopolitan model aren't you?

heavy duty restaurant style mayo

Tell me more about this mythical ambrosia

/r/keto would probably disagree

Lol I was just thinking, I'm on a keto diet, this ain't unhealthy!

Except nutritional science is starting to value proteins and fats (including oils) above carbs.

https://www.webstaurantstore.com/

Reliable or nah?

looks like it. with some places like that you need to have a minimum order or some sort of corporate account. Usually you can find a local one with a warehouse somewhere with 30 miles of you. I can think of 4 relatively close to me and I live in the middle of nowhere.

Webstaurant is pretty good but the shipping tends to really eat away at the savings. Try searching for local warehouse stores and restaurant supply stores. If you have access to someone's business license/tax ID, Restaurant Depot is pretty good and free to join. Doesnt even matter what kind of business you are. They also have really decent smallwares, pots, knives, etc for way less than kitchen boutique shops.

Omg bless your heart. Located my fave creamy Italian dressing that is only available commercially. Now I just need to find someone(s) to split a gallon of salad dressing with....

Split it? Cleary not favorite enough. Go big or go home.

Definitely reliable. Great prices, but they'll kill you on shipping if you don't pay for membership, so make sure your order is large and worth it.

I've re-outfitted my home kitchen with their stuff.

I'm the one guy born and bred in the south who loathes ranch. Revolting stuff.

I hate sweet tea too.

Surprised they haven't lynched ya down by the holler.

Hell, I’m from the north and only lived in the south for college, and I still wanna lynch him.

Sweet tea is pretty much just sugar water that was made in the same room as tea.

I don’t hate you, I just feel sorry for you. I’m with you on sweet tea though.

I love my local restaurant supply store. Sure most bulk things are silly for a home cook to buy, but you can get such great quality basic tools/cutting boards without spending a fortune on some luxury brand. I also prefer kitchen tools that are functional rather than pretty so it beats the hell out of places like Bed Bath And Beyond

But it is not as delicious. Trust me. --Chef

Where the fuck do I buy bulk candy bars. I need names damnit.

Costco. Sam's Club.

What are some restaurant supply stores?

usually they are independent. Just go into google or your search engine of choice and search for "Restaurant supply near me" I almost guarantee there will be one somewhere you can get to if you live anywhere near where they have restaurants

I buy crates of tofu from a restaurant supply store. It's $18 for a crate that has 12 packages in it. Each package has 4 blocks, which is between 2-8 servings for me depending on how I cook it, if I bulk it up with beans or whatnot. I can eat tofu as my main source of protein every day and have enough for 1 or 2 months, for $18 dollars. It's incredible. I don't like meat, I'll eat it if my mom gives me some but really adore tofu. Just thinkin about it is making my mouth water. I'll give you a killer tofu "chicken and waffles" recipe I came up with to try:

For the "chicken fried" tofu part:

Squeeze the tofu over the sink between your hands gently.

Freeze it. This allows crystals of ice to form air pockets in the tofu which makes the texture more toothsome.

Thaw it. Squeeze out excess water gently.

Cut the tofu into pieces, approximately nugget size.

Marinate it in (tamari) soy sauce, garlic (fresh and powder give different notes so I use both), splash of balsamic vinegar, pepper, and whatever else floats your boat. Perhaps some of your favorite hot sauce, I like habanero based sauces. I thin this out a little with water as it can be too intense without it, just adjust to taste. This honestly only needs about 5 minutes because the freeze thaw process makes the tofu VERY spongey and absorbant. If its soggy, squeeze it out just a little, not too much though.

Bread and fry as normal. I use eggs and panko. Even if you've never enjoyed tofu, I think you would like this!

For the waffles:

Purchase mochi. I like "Eden Sweet Brown Rice Mochi." It's the hard blocks, not prepared and soft stuff.

I cut my mochi blocks into cubes. The above type of mochi, I get 6 cubes from one block.

Get out your waffle maker. I like the deep Belgian style ones. Preheat it and spread a dab of oil if needed.

Put mochi cubes in the waffle maker, you can fit about 9 or so if you cut them like I did.

Press down on the waffle maker gently and firmly until it closes. Cook mochi. I open it halfway to grate some nutmeg and sprinkle salt on the mochi, which imo is essential. Cook it until it's very crispy, about 5-7 minutes.

Spread some butter and syrup over mochi waffles.

This recipe is super awesome and I hope someone tries it!

When I get a crate of tofu I freeze most of it right away in smaller portion bags so it's already the texture I like best. I like it softer and fresh too, but the texture it gets from being frozen is amazing.

Exactly. In restaurant, they don't care about your wellbeing and health, they care about the taste as it is what bring the money in. At home, if you buy it premade, you have a nice label that tell you how unhealthy it is. If you make it you realise even more how unhealthy it is because you see all the baddies that you add in.

Except nutritional science is starting to come around to the idea that proteins and fats (and oils) are far healthier than carbs.

We're coming around that fat isn't pure evil.

But there's no way the shit grocery store water+xantham gum+spices is worse for you than pure emulsified fat.

[deleted]

Nutritional science has recommended large doses of carbs, medium doses of protein, and small doses of fats for more than half a century.

Now all that is being revised to large doses of protein, medium doses of fat, and small doses of carbs.

That's quite a sea change. It seems disingenuous and slightly arrogant to imply that it's no big deal and "nutritional science has always known" that.

Please correct me if I'm wrong but I don't think carbs are necessary. There's a lot of good stuff usually attached to carbs, but I don't think the human body actually needs carbs at all. You produce glucose on your own, you don't need them for that.

Tut tut, misrepresenting scientific findings.

yup

But still, her food was literally salt and oil and sugar...

Yeah...a bit like cocaine being healthier than Meth. I guess thats true! But 90% of people reading this eat way too much protein and fats.

Green leafy veggies are still king.

Well not really, many fats are essential for the body to function properly and are genuinely good for you. So the cocaine analogy drops off a bit there.

Since when is cocaine not essential for the body to function?

green leafy veggies are great, but you can't live on fiber, water, and vitamins alone

protein and fats are extremely necessary

Transfats are from Satan. Unsaturated fat is Good. Avoid white sugar, instead favor reputable sweeteners like Xylitol in moderation.

transfers barely exist in unprocessed foods

Yeah, thats often the secret at restaurants. Why does this pasta tastes so great! They used like 10 times the salt you use when you make it is why.

Though I also have noticed a lot of people barely season before cooking or during, doing it after. Stop that! Season your shit first! Get that salt and pepper on now and you wont need it later!

Dietary fat isn't the demon we all thought it was in the 90s

Yeah, but slurping down 1000 calories worth of dressing isn't good no matter if fat is good or evil.

It’s perfectly fine actually assuming you get enough protein in the day and you’re not overdoing it on calories. Far worse for your body is doing the same thing with sugar, which people who enjoy sugary soft drinks do regularly.

If I wasn't clear, I was commenting on the calories, not the makeup of said calories.

In what world is 1000 calories too many for a person?

In a world where you don’t only eat dressing. That 1000 calories is on top of everything else you eat.

And if everything else you eat is your required amount of protein you’re perfectly fine... not sure what’s failing to compute here for you.

1000 calories is not all that much ranch dressing, there is little chance that that is satiating. I'd go as far as to suggest the type of person that eats that is also eating another 2000 calories of food and drink in a day. So, while you're technically correct, in the real world of 70% overweight it's not a fight with fighting.

1000 calories is not all that much ranch dressing, there is little chance that that is satiating

Lol I am underweight and have trouble getting enough calories so you just got me curious how much ranch would be 1000 calories.

This restaurant style stuff may be more calorie dense, but for hidden valley ranch (what came up in Google) it would be 13.7 Tbsp... So getting close to a full cup of ranch.

It's almost enough for my fried chicken and fries. But what will I dip my pizza crusts in?

Better get another cup so you can have the full recommended 2000 calories.

Satiety isn't a physical "my stomach is full" thing, it's a hormonal thing. If your body's hormones are working correctly then theoretically they should start getting sick of eating it before they eat too much.

Unfortunately, overweight people's hormones are fucked and rarely get that satiety signal. Being overweight my entire life and actually feeling that signal from dieting is fucking weird. I can actually put food down and be like yeah, I don't need to eat literally every bite of this to be happy.

The world is not 70% overweight. I can’t believe I still have to say this, the world is not America.

I'm not American either, just that ranch dressing is a very American food.

It's apparently 30%, which is still an insane amount of the world.

It actually seems much more reasonable given lengthening lifespans and etc.

Yes, but if you are eating Keto or low carb you don’t get cravings to sit down and eat something like that if you are doing it right.

While there is now some evidence that saturated fat isn't quite as bad as previously thought the research is not conclusive and the medical profession still advises you to avoid large amounts of saturated fat. This article from Harvard Medical School covers it quite well (spoiler, the real baddie is trans-fat)

https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/the-truth-about-fats-bad-and-good

fat isnt horrible but that doesnt mean drowning your meals in 700cal of ranch is good for you

And there is no direct evidence linking trans fat to disease either, although lots of circumstantial

Yeah but it isn't a saint either, especially trans fats, and excessive omega-6 fatty acids.

Exactly. Doesn't mean go keto and start eating spoonfuls of mayo.

God even on keto I ignored mayo. Gimme avocados and bacon.

Ive done exactly that. Lost 25 lbs. Eating lots of fat is fine as long as you keep the total calories down.

Not everything is wheight loss, there are side effects of high fat diets, even if you are losing wheight. Depends on the type of fat of course.

Fat isn't bad for you, you're thinking of sugar.

Depends on the type of fat. In short

  • Trans-fat - very bad
  • Saturated fat - bad
  • Monounsaturated fat - good
  • Omega 3 fats - good
  • Omega 6 fats - very good.

Trans fats are undoubtedly bad but there isn't actually any scientific evidence that saturated fat is bad for you. People on keto eat a lot of saturated fat and nearly always see their cholesterol and blood pressure drop.

Sugar isn’t bad for you either...

How to make salad the least healthy part of your meal.

Good news! Fat doesn't clog your arteries! Bad news! This is still a shit ton of calories so it doesn't actually matter regardless!

Except the idea that high fat, high cholesterol foods would clog your arteries seems to be obsolete.

A restaurants job is to make food that tastes good. Not to be your dietician

r/arteryhurtingjuice

Check out the ELI5 from a few months ago where someone asked why restaurant food tastes better. Or don't and enjoy the food.

(Hint: LOTS of butter)

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/18615352/

Artery hurting juice

(You can make it with buttermilk and olive oil, too.)

Same ELI5 but honey mustard?👀

Sure. This one is even easier.

Cup of mayo, 1/3rd cup of mustard (Experiment with different kinds, ive never found a bad one) and a fat squeeze/spoon of your favorite honey. whisk/stir vigorously until the color changes. You will know what I mean.

Yep, I always laugh because the main ingredient isn't named.

I had no idea they put mayo in honey mustard!!! My whole life has been a lie!!!

When in doubt, add mayo.

Can I make cheescake but with mayo instead of cream cheese?

i had a heartattack so had to ‘adjust’ diet and then i found out honey mustard had all that mayo…

…make super healthy TASTY salad dressing like this :

= parts dijon mustard, vinegar, olive oil, honey

sugar / salt / pepper -spice adust for taste (sometimes add onion or garlic powder etc )

Put some anchovie paste up in that bitch. Maybe a squirt of your favorite citrus.

It’s what makes it thick. If you just add honey to mustard it becomes runny as fuck.

Hunny mussie is not vegetal afterall!

We make all our salad dressings from scratch at my work, and almost all of them use mayo....

Still delicious, but I was a little grossed out when I realized thousand island is literally just mayo, ketchup, and relish...

Have I got some news for you. Any “creamy” type of dressing or dip for the most part is going to have mayo in it.

We make all our salad dressings from scratch at my work, and almost all of them use mayo....

Still delicious, but I was a little grossed out when I realized thousand island is literally just mayo, ketchup, and relish...

bruh i fucking love a good honey mustard but thinking about mayo within arms reach makes me wanna gag. thanks a lot fuckers.

I mean, there's honey mustard without mayo, but it's not as good--it's the dark yellow color, brown and yellow.

Wtf!! no wonder my honey+mustard never tasted right!

A buddy working at Applebee’s 20 years ago told me their recipe was 2 parts mayo, 1 part honey, 1 part mustard. Based on your ratios I’m gonna wager it’s not an exact science and there’s room for error and taste.

I also like to add black pepper to mine!

Looking specifically for the Deny's/IHOP honey mustard.

Next time I go there.. which will prolly be a few years.. Im gonna ask for honey mayo mustard.

I expect that they either use sysco or Kens. Kens is a restaurant quality product that you can often find in stores.

What about thousand island?

A cup of so of mayo, a large spoonful each of both yellow and Dijon mustard, a small pinch of prepared horseradish, a drizzle of honey (50-60% of the total amount of mustard you put in, I'd say), a squeeze of fresh lemon and orange juice, salt and pepper. Super flavorful and nuanced yet fast enough to throw together for a quick snack.

I’ve heard that ChickFilA’s honey mustard, one of my favorite condiments on earth, has horseradish in it. It’s also not creamy at all, it’s actually a bit translucent, so I think it doesn’t have mayo in it.

I usually use Dijon and honey. Very tasty, very easy.

Have an upvote for now... I’ll be back if it’s not precisely how I like it, my weapon of choice will be a strongly worded negative yelp review

This is like saying "if people had recipes for this food they would never come to restaurants" like fuck no I'm lazy af , I'm here coz I can't cook as well as y'all

It's not the cooking that gets me. It's the pile of dishes after.

That’s cause it’s liquid gold!

Saving this comment and I’m about to blow my wife’s mind.

You’ve done the lords work

Is that Sysco mayo, Best Foods/Hellmans, or what?

sysco is a proper heavy duty mayo. Hellmans/best foods doesnt have the right stuff. even their "Extra heavy" mayo is mostly air.

general rule of mayo is the larger the jar it comes in the better it tastes/worse it is for you. The brand usually doesn't matter. Find something in a big jug that you have never heard of before and you should be alright.

Saved that shit right there. I'm about to be way more popular with the kids. Time to get some chips an shit.

Add a bit of garlic powder and black pepper as well.

I'm gonna hit this ranch recipe this weekend after I head down to the quad Melo

How long could one keep said ranch in fridge?

If you wait to add the sour cream probably for a long time. Although idk the fridge life on buttermilk. If it's the same or shorter than sour cream then you don't have to wait I would imagine.

quite a while

Major W goes to you sir

Or, you could do it from scratch:

Sour Cream

Buttermilk

Parsley

Chives

Dill

Celery Seed

S&P

If you can let it sit overnight, all the better.

Do people not know how to make ranch these days?

The sour buttermilk? European here, we don't have ranch. Wanna try making some. Need to figure out what's in those packets though..

When I was in the kitchen we made it even simpler and they still loved it. Equal parts mayo and whole milk with the appropriate amount of powder never failed.

Normal dude turned chef here...thanks.

I was gonna say it's because it gets left out all day and it sours nicely. Didn't realize there's an actual recipe!

Never heard of a chef making ranch with a packet.

We hate making ranch. The quicker we can get it done, the better. And HV is kind of the industry standard.

Not surprising that Hidden Valley is standard considering that they were the company that invented it. But yeah, it's kind of a trash dressing anyway so it makes sense not to waste time doing it from scratch.

Totally kidding. HV is freaking delicious.

lol then they were either lying to you or really good chefs.

you can do it with some dill, pepper and garlic if you really want to be extra

Tbh I've never heard of a chef making any form of ranch. I was mostly joking. Truth be told I've tasted some "signature ranches" and and they all taste like hidden valley with extra spices added.

Don’t worry, we’re too lazy to actually make it

Comment saved

In order to make ranch... I need ranch?

Can you tell me how to make the Sticky Wings sauce from Dallas BBQ??

no idea. Although if i had ever tried it I could probably make a very close copy

The answer is always butter, isn't it?

If you really want to die young, get the dairy products at a Polish grocer.

I'm allergic to dairy AND lactose-intolerant but ranch is worth it.

Now I know how the sausage is made. If I can taste the mayo the next time I eat ranch at Ale House I'll be very upset, lol.

You give people too much credit . I know how to make things , but I don’t , cos I’m lazy

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If younare outside of the US, "ranch" dressing and flavoring is often referred to as "American-styke" in other parts of the world, if it's known at all. I believe that outside the US, Doritos has a version called "American-style" flavoring.

Basically it's just a gross (IMO) Creamy salad dressing that's only good for dipping raw broccoli in as an appetize.

That's essentially how our nursing home dietary makes it lol.

Edit: the large batch.

Like a lot of restaurant “secrets” it’s just a lot of fat. It’s not hard to make things taste delicious when you add butter or cream to them.

It is so hard to find buttermilk at a normal grocery store. I grew up in the SE but am in the SW now and my biscuits and gravy haven't been the same.

baking section. sometimes its powdered

Now do blue cheese!

same recipe but add blue cheese crumble. Gorganzola works too

Deli worker here....we do it a lil different and still hand out ranch by the glassfuls... One large packet of hidden valley, one cup buttermilk and 2 cups water to one gallon of mayo...mix...drink.

I worked in a University cafeteria for over 7 years and we would make 5 gallons a day. We were the small cafeteria on campus btw.

Not a chef here. But for everyone following along about to try this at home, take that sour cream, mayo, and buttermilk part, and instead of adding ranch flavor, just have fun and put in just about whatever you can think of that you like. Seriously, people who don't know anything about cooking will think you're a wizard.

My personal favorite is to add the same seasoning I use for tacos.

Chef here. I thought all of us chef's hated ranch with a passion?

What about Russian/thousand island? I’ve wondered for years....

thousand island is ketchup, mayo and relish in whichever order you like. Russian dressing adds a bit of horseradish and some Worcestershire sauce. Maybe hot sauce if thats your thing. Also, traditional russian dressing can have a bit of beet juice to make it that really rich red color. I leave it out as I hate beets

People are too lazy to make it themselves. They know to get the packets (or large container of Hidden Valley at Costco).. but I refuse to buy that awful pre-made stuff at the grocery store. Many of those versions are full of HFCS. The taste of FRESH homemade ranch dressing is just heaven. When I was a kid, there were NO “packets”. Gramma called it Buttermilk dressing, and made it with herbs and fresh ingredients. YUM!

if you want to make gam gams stuff, I would assume she probably used something close to Dill, chive, garlic, pepper, salt, onion powder and marjoram.

but yeah, it is delicious. I like the MSG and maltodextrin you get from the packet stuff personally but to each their own.

I know this will fall on deaf ears, but plain Greek yogurt is a great alternative to sour cream

I’m lactose intolerant and I think my asshole is bleeding just from reading the ingredient list.

You just made me quit ranch dressing cold turkey

I detest Mayo. What is a good substitute?

Do you like ranch?

You can double up on the sour cream and go a bit heavier on the buttermilk but its not quite the same. People like to pretend that you can use Miracle Whip in place of mayo but for ranch it just doesn't work.

I really would recommend a bit of mayo just for consistency though. Even a bit helps because it has the emulsifiers that hold it together and give it that smooth quality.

Who the fuck would want all that sweet from the Miracle whip in their ranch?

some jerk, I assume

Ah yes. 4 years ago I served a four top. I was collecting plates and one of the gentlemen asked for dessert and a side of ranch with his cheesecake. Weird, but I don't judge.

He sat there, ate the cheesecake and drank the ranch like it was an espresso. It made me instantly distrust people that ask for ranch if they don't have food in front of them. I judged him. I judged him HARD.

He literally sat, one leg crossed over the other and sipped his ranch like they were at a sweet little cafe in Italy and not a basketball restaurant at a theme park. The restaurant has since closed and been changed to a new themed restaurant but every time I go there I have to stare at the spot where part of my soul died.

He tipped well though.

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Somehow this sounds even worse. Watery ranch? Jesus.

Bring me my ranch hose!

Its like they juiced the iceberg lettuce into the ranch dressing.

HURK

writes down date and time

I was here when this was born.

Ooh, date and time. Mixing the format up a bit.

This post was brought to you by the time and place gang.

I'm up in my years a bit and I've been around the shadier parts of the internet since the beginning, so I've seen and read me some shit let me tell ya, but boy howdy, that one disturbs me on some sort of gut level. I had a body-wide physical reaction of disgust from reading your post.

White man's doogh

Is there nothing that this world wont do.. like seriously just when you think you've heard it all. Now we drink watered down ranch.. great.

Ngl I've been tempted to drink blue cheese dressing right out of the cup. It's just so tasty...

I definitely fish out all the extra chunks of blue cheese with a fork when I'm finished dipping. Can't let that go to waste.

You. You know what's up.

You possess the soul of a writer.

And my ranch-clogged heart.

Mother of God!!!!!

I believe there should be a constitutional amendment outlawing ranch dressing anyway. But someone who sips it like coffee is definitely a serial killer, right? I mean, they have to be. Why else would they do that?

Like Dave Mingchang drinking ketchup

I once had a lady order a bowl (literally a soup bowl) full of blue cheese dressing and had me bring her extras plates. Come back a few mins later and she's drinking it out of the bowl like a Chinese tea and the kids are licking their helpings off the little plates. Weird as fuck but at least they can all be weird together and not be ashamed of it.

I love people and their weird orders. I love finding a new wrinkle that befuddles me. Little kitten children, licking their blue cheese milk off the plate,that sounds so funny and cute.

Was he fat?

I call it country club fat. It's the extra pounds you have because you have money. You're still in shape, you don't have a gut, but you drink beers at the country club with the boys a lot so it's a little bloated.

I'm surprised he could cross his legs

You tip right I'll happily serve u oj and horse radish with a Colgate chaser and luv you for being a true freak!!!

These must not be the same HV ranch packets sold at grocery stores. I just can't imagine one little pack making over a gallon of ranch.

They are. Just with equal parts buttermilk and extra heavy Hellmans mayo.

Source: Chef who made enough to fill a Olympic swimming pool full

I'd watch that relay event.

Michael Phelps trying to butterfly his way through white goop would be the highlight of the summer games.

that would be AWESOME!

Next on ESPN 8: The OCHO!

Aren't you using the foodservice packets though? Those are much bigger than the ones sold in grocery stores. The grocery store ones call for a cup each of mayo and buttermilk.

Most of us have. I know I hit an incredible amount in 10 years cooking.

I’m sure you guys also have this, but when I was in culinary school we had a catering service and there was a floor mounted mixer that you could bathe in if needed. The whisk used with it was height of a small child.

As an avid ranch afficianado, thank you for your service.

That makes no sense, because up above where he reduces the recipe to a reasonable amount to use at home, he cuts the ranch packets in half to two, while reducing all the other ingredients to a much larger degree. What gives?

Someone else also confirmed the ranch packets used by restaurants are much bigger. I think you're wrong about them being the same.

Same ingredients different size. Thought that was self evident.

Thank you for your service, chef.

You're right, they come in large (like, fakey-potato-package large) as well. I think that's what he's talking about.

It actually is those packets! I would make it when I worked at a restaurant

You mean these small ones that only call for 16oz of liquid? Not the food service sized packets?

Used to work at a burger place, we used to mix like, two packets with buttermilk and then an entire gallon of mayo.

Kinda ruined ranch for me.

I still eat it, but I'm not happy about it

Why did it ruin it for you? I'm not following.

It's like, 80% mayonnaise.

Whenever we made a new batch of ranch, I was scooping out a gallon of mayo each time

Oh, I see. For me, I love mayonnaise so I didn't see what you meant lol.

They are. The packets have the recipe on them too.

Can someone do the math? As weird as this sounds my sister asked for a restaurant taste ranch recipe for Christmas. I wish I was joking.

The ranch packers restaurants use are much larger than the ones at your local super market. There’s a recipe on the back of the packet.

I'm assuming you want the amount for one packet. 1 packet of dry HV ranch packet, 7/8 gallon of buttermilk, half gallon of mayo and 1 & 1/4 lb of sour cream.

This is for one restaurant sized packet though FYI not the small store purchases.

What is restaurant size? How many oz?

Online looks like 3.2 oz to make about a gallon of dressing. For a standard retail 1 oz package use 20 ounces each Mayo and buttermilk. Refrigerate 12 hours before use and keep refrigerated until used by date on buttermilk.

You know your system is shit when you have to refer to 7/8ths of something without switching units.

And which system came up with ranch? Yeah! Game set match...

None of them. Steve Henson invented ranch dressing, and he's not a system of measurement.

much like baseball - no one else cares

Woah now - we "were" having a polite conversation here.

Mm would you prefer he says 7 pints of milk?

I think they might prefer to have it expressed as 33.1224 deciliters.

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331.224ml

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It's pedantic.

Learn how to spell or keep calling people retards. It's your choice.

Or, you know: 7/8 of a gallon (7 pints), and not being an insulting weirdo.

There was nothing wrong with the way that it was expressed in the beginning.

the funny thing is that base 10 doesn't inherently make more sense than base 8.

his argument is especially invalid when you realize that 7/8 is a proportion which can be represented in any base (but just so happens to simplest in base 8)

it becomes especially ridiculous when you realize that the 7 pints measurement is probably arbitrary to begin with. I doubt that buttermilk conspired with sour cream to achieve maximum flavor only when mixed within the constraints of the imperial measurement system.

But it is the most American flavor of all, so who knows.

Wait what's 7/8ths in base 3?

7/8 = 21/24 = (21/8)/3 

   ×3    ÷8

That's not what the other guy said, better go hash it out with him

Thats not even base 3, if by base we talk about the dividing number. I don't know the english math vocabulary.

And it it doesn't even equal 7/8

Metric measuring is in base 10, as is normal counting, where each digit can be in a range of 0-9 before you have to increment the next one. Hours are in base 12 (or 24 in the military). Binary (where all numbers are 0s and 1s) is base 2.

I cant deal with american measurements at all. 7/8 of a gallon could be anything from one meals worth of ranch to the amount needed to serve a busy restaurant all night. Just got 0 concept of these in my mind. That said, I assume it's the same for Americans and metric though. Metric seems easier to convert to me but to each his own.

If only there were an easily-accessible tool that could be used for transmogrifying unfamiliar units into more-familiar units.

It would really change the way that people do things.

I know I can do that...doesnt change the fact that a recipe with imperial measurements is useless to me without converting

Alright. But please realize that you're on an American website, talking about the most American of condiments, using the most American of languages.

It follows that we use American units.

I'm not going to go to Germany and demand my measures to be presented in quarts, pints, and pounds. I'm not going to insult them for doing things in ways that are foreign to me.

Instead I will figure out enough of their own adopted system to get it (whatever it is) done.

You would do well to do the same.

an American website

With a huge percentage of non-american users.

most American of languages

You mean...English? Literally named for another country?

The vast majority of us are in the US.

American English is quite different from British English.

Our US gallon is also different from the Imperial gallon.

You wanna hang out with the kids on this side of the pond? Learn to speak the fucking language.

The vast majority of us are in the US

Jesus Christ. You barely make up half of the traffic. So get off your fucking high horse.

Learn to speak the fucking language.

I'd wager that my English is a lot better than whatever second or third languages you speak, if any.

At any rate, I dont get what the hell got you this worked up about my purely subjective statement that I cant deal with American measurements because unless you grow up with them they dont make any sense.

You're really an insulting little thing, aren't you?

I'm not worked up, my dude. You're the one who has a problem measuring fucking ranch dressing in gallons.

7/8ths of a gallon is 3.5 quarts. Yall are just dummies

Will you be my new Siri voice?

3 quarts, 1 pint.

This sounds more like satire with every post.

ah you're just mad he didn't say 3.3122353 liters

What an absurd criticism.

As a chef he translated it to normal people for you, in a kitchen it would of been "A gallon minus 3 spoons" and yes, spoon is a universal measurement to us, its a special spoon.

But to switch units I have to divide by... wait, what unit am I in, gallons, next one down is quarts but that's only 1/4 and I need to represent 7/8, so go down another unit, pints then...okay so that's 7 pints.

In metric it's as simple as moving the decimal place. 2.8L or 2800mL, no division or factions required.

What is wrong with 7/8s? That is actually perfect for gallons 3 and 1/2 quarts or 3 quarts and 1 pint or 7 pints.

Are fractions to difficult for you?

Found the imperial. Ignoring your snide remarks, what is wrong with 7/8s? Aside from the fact that we are a base 10 creature, humans handle whole numbers MUCH better than fractions. Additionally, you lose precision crazy fast. Sure you might be able to eyeball 7/8ths. But what is 1/32nd of an inch? Can you eyeball that with a measuring tape? What about 1/64th? Your smallest unit of measurement has to be cut up into fractions to get to any level of precision.

How many ounces are in 3 1/2 quarts?

How many cups are in 3 3/4 pints? You might be able to eyeball that is 7.5 cups, but how many gallons is that? I know you can't eyeball that solution. The answer is .46785. What is that as a fraction? Well it simplifies to 9357/20000. As soon as you start transitioning between units, the fractions lose all meaning. We could just generalize this to 1/2 (10000/20000), but then we lose precision. You either give up precision, or you give up intuition. The units have no linear relation to one another.

Don't forget the partridge in a pear tree!

No. I need to make 5 gallons.

3.5 quarts of buttermilk, half gallon of mayo, 1.25 lbs sour cream for 1 packet of the dry ranch

The important thing is that the mayo in restaurants is predominately extra heavy mayo, which is why it always tastes different than what you buy in the store

Dude, the packets you buy in the store are for 1/8 or less of the ingredients you're listing here. Remember, people not in the business are getting tiny packets.

Don't make this so complicated! -Buy the Hidden Valley Ranch brand packet at store, follow the instructions on the back!

The pre-made, bottled stuff tastes bad because it has a lot of preservatives and 'industry short-cuts' in it. The original recipe and flavor packet makes nectar-of-the-gods ranch dressing and you WILL eat 3 heads of lettuce getting your fill... I guarantee it!

*Pro Tip: Buy extra TP... If you eat that much salad in one sitting, I shit you not, you will shit your pants, the bed, your bath mat... Pretty much everything!

But the instructions on the back of the envelope don't have sour cream.

The caterer above is proffering an accurate answer to the question being asked, which relates to the differences between the ranch dressing at a restaurant and ranch dressing at home.

Part of their answer includes adding sour cream even though none is normally used.

Don't simplify the answer out of the equation.

I know how to do it. But look at the comment I replied to. A pound and a half of sour cream for "one packet"??? They are talking about the packets you get when you work for a commercial kitchen.

So I was trying to advise that buying one packet from the grocers takes like a cup of mayo and a cup of buttermilk or something. Not 3 and a half quarts of buttermilk.

Right?! I was trying to back you up friend. Skip the math and just read the instructions on the packet... It is really good and so simple! - my mom used to make a old-fashioned pickle jar full of that stuff... The big jar... Like a mini carboy of it... And we kids would gorge on it till we would almost puke! (no... I'm not kidding about the 3 heads of lettuce!)

Ah, gotcha!

And yeah, the diner I work in now? The customers practically take shots of it. It's...unnerving how much ranch people drink. I mean "eat".

Some ask Reddit thread about weird shit you've seen people do had a reply about how a lady bought her son a soup bowl of ranch, paid like 10 dollars for it too. Kid just drank it with a spoon

Thought that worth sharing, but ya I've washed a lot of dishes and the sides of ranch were almost always licked clean it seemed, but people would just toss plenty of other sides

So, read... the... instructions.

INSTRUCTIONS UNCLEAR GIVE THE MATH.

Yeah, the restaurant packets are 3.2 oz (at least the ones I'm seeing on restaurant supply websites), whereas the regular grocery store versions seem to come in 0.4 oz and 1 oz packets.

I mean i could google it, but can someone tell us how big these hidden valley packets are?

Live in new Zealand not the states!

How long does those last? If you make it yourself before it goes bad

How long does those last? If you make it yourself before it goes bad

A week... Tops. We never had any left to throw out after 2-3 days though. (Family of 5 made it look easy.)

Hmm yeah it will probably go to waste. I don't eat much things that require ranch often at home so it would probably go to waste any left overs I use. Thanks though

The important thing is that the mayo in restaurants is predominately extra heavy mayo, which is why it always tastes different than what you buy in the store

So where can a normal person get "extra heavy" mayo?

That’s a good question. Possibly a wholesaler like Costco or BJ’s? I’ve never bought it outside of a restaurant. If you’re a regular at a restaurant I would say ask them if they’d be willing to sell you some

Your ratios are off. 1 to 1 on buttermilk and mayo. Ditch the sour cream.

1025g mayo 488g sour cream 325g buttermilk 25g minced garlic 13g hot sauce 2g paprika 8g salt 16g chives (fresh, and chopped) 25g dill (fresh, and chopped) 10g dried parsley 4g black pepper

This isn't the math but a ranch recipe for restaurant ranch.

I just follow the directions on the packet of hidden valley ranch and it comes out great.

The buttermilk recipe packet is the good one. Also makes the best dip, imo.

Fuck, I’ve been doing Christmas wrong

boy you were on the internet at the right time lol

Tell me about it!

1 packet makes a gallon.

So you can go 32oz of mayo and buttermilk and half a packet and so on and so forth

I dare you to find the full sized packets and make the entire recipe for her. Leave it under the tree in a big tub

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pf-Vw0XET7c

Well considering the ingredients listed are all negative values, I guess you have to give them to a chef??

If you really want some dang good ranch, use Mexican crema as a replacement for the sour cream. That’s how you get the extra fat if you are using store bought mayo. Not a chef, just Texan.

The recipe is above. Please gift her 6 gallons of restaurant ranch. I'm not joking. It'll be just lke that GMC commerical... She'll LOVE IT!

Similar recipe in my restaurant - we add fresh chives too.

I’ve a similar recipe as well and it seems to be gone in half a day.

Can confirm, have worked in multiple bar/grill joints, this is the ranch crack op craves.

Powdered Hidden Valley Ranch also has MSG in it. Our taste buds love that stuff!

Buy accent! I put msg in everything and it makes everything taste amazing

Hell yeah! If you have hippie friends who don't like chemical names, try yeast extract. It's basically MSG and other amino acids but with a vegan-friendly name.

Interesting. Though I always put accent in food I make even for people who are chemphobes. They never seem to notice when it's naturally occurring or when I add it until I say something 🤔

My friend owns a chinese restaurant and says he tells people they don't use MSG and use it anyway. Never causes a problem.

Some use way too much, though. You can notice that if you feel parched or dry, just like if there's too much salt in the food, but don't taste the salt.

In my book "msg free" is an advertisement that the Asian food is gonna be bland.

Braggs, man. Health-food-store glorified soy sauce. Basically pure MSG. Changed my life as a seasoning. The label is almost, but not quite, as entertaining as Dr. Bronners.

I hang out too much at my local co-op, and maybe this is prejudging, but I feel like the same people that shop there and shun MSG on principal go bananas over Braggs.

(This reply was meant for /u/foxramtheta)

Ever had to prepare a ranch fountain?

I've seen teenagers take shots of ranch out of ramekins, I almost puked.

You ever seen ranch soda

I think the sour cream is why people like it so much. It makes sense.

Chef here too! Big catering facilities/large restaurants that sell ranch out the wazoo use this recipe a bunch, but my small restaurant/homemade ranch is just as easy (and less like the classic ranch, but tasty just the same). I’m also a bad chef, am semi drunk, and eyeball my recipes out the butt, so here’s mine:

Mayo and buttermilk combined to a “dressing” consistency. The following assumes that you’re using about 2 cups of each, or have a quart total of your desired thickness and texture:

3 T chopped parsley (or AS MUCH AS YOU WANT, cause parsley is love) 1 T onion powder (ranch essentially is onion powder suspended in mayo. Use an epic shit ton if you choose) 1 tsp garlic powder 2 T fine chopped chives 1 tsp fresh ass garlic purĂŠe S&P TT

Whip it up with some fresh goat cheese, and you have a creamy ranch that’s both familiar and comforting, and fresh and refined.

Also, I’m not great at a lot of things at my job. I’m a decent line cook. I can run a busy service and stay calm. I write an amazing menu, but take a long time to tweak it so it’s feasible to plate and cost appropriately. I never went to school, and feel like a constant phony. But damn would I be able to confidently teach a class all about salads and salad dressings. I can make some bomb vinaigrettes.

This guy knows how to party...with ranch.

These are the larger industrial sized ranch packets that are sold to restaurants.

Bartender I’d like a refill please

Imma make this one day, thank you chef bo yard e !

That sounds quite healthy.

But how do you make the blue cheese dressing like at hot wing restaurants

TIL other chefs use ranch packets instead of fresh herbs, garlic/onion powder, paprika, and lemon juice.

So. . . Your's is just fresh and whatever they do to it to make it shelf stable makes it worse?

It disgusts me how much ranch people some how consume.

I find it disconcerning that the recipe for ranch dressing includes ranch dressing

I think they're talking about the packets of dry ranch seasoning.

Also, not trying to be that guy, just trying to be helpful: disconcerting*

Holy crap if this the ranch that I will choose my favorite restaurants by then you are my favorite person and this is my favorite comment.

Stooooop. We aren’t supposed to tell anyone.

Commenting to come back. Thanks mate

Did you know you can save individual comments?

Literally the only ranch I will eat!

Mediocre chef here... can confirm

Now tell us the secret to sour cream!

I'm foh, I tell me line cooks verbatim what the guests ask for when it comes to the amount of Ranch! they want to drink. If I didn't, the scorn would be directed at me.

I happen to believe there should be a constitutional ammendment outlawing ranch dressing. Anyway, I agree about guests just hammering that stuff. I have literally seen guests drink ranch out of a ramekin. It's so foul.

Could you repeat the recipe in metric for us that don't understand freedom units?

Add some fresh dill, dill weed!

Just gave me flash backs to prep cook days.

What's a ranch packet??

Edit: like in my head I'm imaging those little ketchup packets you get at fast food places but with ranch

Sour cream... add that to anything and it’s better.. add it to scrambled eggs, you’ll get the softest eggs ever

Oh well... time to get fat :)

Made in a big plastic tub with a stainless steel paint mixer on the end of a cordless drill I'll assume.

You had me at mayo<333333

Whats the measurements for a ranch packet? Either imperial or metric.

That's for a single adult sized serving, right?

I'm a kitchen manager and it's 70 dollars a case to get 4 gallons premade ranch but a quarter of the price to make it this way. Haven't tried it with sour cream though but I'll give it a shot.

Hmm, sounds like almost enough ranch for my salad. Put some ham, chicken, bacon and cheese, and if there’s room left over, maybe sprinkle some lettuce in there for color.

What size is a “packet”, in this case? You roughly know the weight/volume?

Careful, using negative amounts for ingredients will create anti-ranch. It tastes pretty much the same, but you should never bring it into contact with ordinary ranch.

This guy works in Indiana

Follow up chef here: this isn’t how we made our home made dressing.

Sounds gross - I hate white sauce

Welp guess this means I can’t have restaurant ranch as I’m allergic to 2 things listed here (not that I really get it outside of small small restaurants)

If you ever think, "why is X better at a restaurant?"

The answer is either butter, mayonnaise or cream.

If you add some to your recipe and it still isn't as good as the restaurant's, you didn't add enough you weak willed peon.

Seriously. More butter, you're not using enough.

Except for the sour cream (which now sounds interesting), we used the same mixed our Ranch at my colleges cafeteria the same way. Hidden Valley Ranch packets, buttermilk and gallons of mayo.

Then just mix till consistent and fill 5 gallons buckets till they are needed.

I gained 5 pounds just reading this!

Now do blue cheese!

What about blue cheese?

Looks like plankton wouldn't have any troubles with you :/

Chef here. Can confirm.

The best ranch dressing I have ever had came from Jets Pizza. It’s 11/10.

You monster! The valley is hidden for a reason...don’t give away the secrets.

That's:

1 packet Hidden Valley ranch
6 cups buttermilk
4 cups mayo
2 1/3 cups sour cream

No need to convert, thanks.

What about making Russian? Always wondered ...

I hate mayo. I love ranch. I always sort of suspected ranch had mayo in it. But now you’ve gone and ruined it for me :(

Your ratio is off. For best results add equal parts buttermilk and mayo. Ditch the sour cream.

Ranch at a restaurant is made with mayo and buttermilk. You can make restaurant quality ranch at home! All you need to do is buy the ranch powder packet, usually on the top shelf above the dressings, and follow the instructions by adding mayo and buttermilk. Voila! Ranch made the exact same way restaurants make it. This ranch will only last as long as the expiration date on the buttermilk. Enjoy!

When I was a kid this was the only ranch there was. You had to make it yourself. I mean, I’m only 47, but I’m almost older than ranch. Fucking hell.

I'm also 47. I'm pretty sure we're older than bottled ranch

For sure

Almost 30 here. Im younger than ranch, but too old to make fun of you guys for being old.

Yall wanna go get some tapioca and yell at the news?

Yelling at the news is currently my main form of entertainment. Tapioca would only improve it. I'm in.

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My wife says I'm old because I get excited when we get cottage cheese. Just because I like cottage cheese and raisins (separate) doesn't mean I'm old Margaret!

i fucking love cottage cheese, and have since i was a wee lass. i didn't know that was considered an old people thing, but they get to be cranky and delightfully blunt so I'm in.

I know you're old because your wife's name is Margaret.

Dehydrated grapes? no thank you.

Have you tried them together?

I haven't and don't think the taste would be bad but the difference between the toughness/texture would be off-putting.

I like the contrast, actually. I used to put them both on salads, and then one day tried them together without the rest of the salad and it's great

Pickled beets and cottage cheese (at the same time) is basically my new favorite side dish.

I don't like pickled beets. Roast them and they are amazing though.

Username checks out.

and a can of pineapple chunks

This may be a stupid question, but what exactly is cottage cheese?

Cheese that lives in a cottage, duh. No, wait, it's cheese you're only allowed to eat in a cottage. Sorry, I got mixed up.

But seriously, it's similar to the curds and whey of Little Miss Muffet fame. Whey is the watery liquid that's left over after making cheese. Cheese curds are the base form of cheese that will be manipulated and molded into the cheeses you see at the store. Instead of making these curds into other various cheeses, they salt, wash and drain the curds. They don't press the curds like they would if they were making cheese so a little bit of whey remains and gives a milky consistency to the curds. It has a slightly sour taste, reminiscent of sour cream.

Cottage cheese comes in large curd and small curd varieties. Large curd is made with rennet, a curdling agent, and small curd is made without rennet. (Rennet is often made from calf stomachs, though there are vegetarian sources of rennet as well.)

I don't know if you can get it everywhere, but there's a seasoning mix called Cavender's that is the absolute best thing that ever happened to cottage cheese. I grew up eating it and couldn't imagine one without the other.

Oh no, I'm 26, hate tapioca but get mad at the news too. Can I be your PFY intern? Lol

I already have a PFY, but he'll graduate soon. I'll let you know if his position opens up.

Got room for a butterscotch man? I'll bring extra for the group.

im 31 and i guzzle ranch during sex

Practice safe sex, use a condiment.

This guy acting like everyone doesnt have a bedroom ranch hose:/

hey man you tryna hit this ranch?

I like the powdered ranch, we snorting it up!

im 31 and i guzzle ranch during sex

..... that’s not ranch.

FRIGGIN NEWS! DAMN YOU!

THINGS ARENT LIKE THEY USED TO BE!

BACK IN MY DAY...

I’m 22 and also younger than ranch. I have nothing to add to the conversation; I just felt like saying that sentence.

Get off my lawn

Jumping on the 47 year old check-in. Is everyone on Reddit either like under 23 or exactly 47?

Exactly 47. I stopped aging. I only drink formaldehyde.

I resemble that remark .

51 here. Fuck you

60 here. And the horse you rode in on.

What's a horse?

It's what you get when your siblings are better at shooting hoops than you are.

It’s what you ride on the ranch. Or the range. Or whatever.

It's like a giraffe with a short neck, actually I don't know much about giraffes as I only saw one once while I was hiding in a tree from velociraptors

Do you know what "hoarse" is?

Unwilling to reveal my age here, fuck you.

53 here... but that old fart 60 year old beat me to the punch.

48 here. I'll ask kids which is weirder, that my generation grew up without internet or without ranch. The ranch thing always blows their mind more than the internet.

Have you explained that means no cool ranch doritos? That one always blows my kids' minds.

That's hilarious.

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49 here. Fuck your cake day. :)

I'll be 28 in 13 minutes, FUCK ALL YALL.

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Congrats you beat the facebook rush.

I turn 40 on Saturday. Quick story, when I was turning 16 really wanted a pair of 14 hole Doc Martens for my birthday. My parents thought it would be hilarious if they gave me one shoe for my birthday and the other one for Christmas. I was not amused. I’m actually wearing them right now! Can provide photo evidence, if anyone is curious. I mean about still having the shoes and not the Shoe Catastrophe of ‘94.

Happy birthday you old bitch

Hahaha. Thanks for the birthday wishes and the love. I’m gonna print this out and frame it but because I’m old now, I’m probably going to do it all wrong.

Haha hope you had a good birthday dude/dudette!

Congrats, you just peaked, welcome to the slow decline.

Nah, did the military, still gotta finish college, have kids, work a job, THEN it's all down hill.

Did you swerve the mustang you couldn't afford? If so then your ahead of the game.

Nah I was one of the older guys, turned 22 in bootcamp. Bought a Civic for 3.5% interest.

Also a member of club 47, I remember when they put it in supermarkets and the chick with the folding table gave out samples with crudite.

She was the pusher. Ranch went viral before there was viral.

You guys should start a club of 47 year olds. You could have meetings where you discuss things that you are older than.

Now I want to be 47 worse than I wanted to be 21. Just 4 more months....

Also 47, but only for 3 more months. Can I still join?

I'm 33, so I wouldn't know. You'd probably be better off trying to get pre-approved to join a club for 48 year olds.

That would include floppy disks, email, MRI machines, and digital cameras.

In Europe "Cool Ranch" Doritos are called Cool American Doritos.

They are named after me.

But not boxed spinach!!!

Also 47 but can't eat bottled or packet Ranch after making my own fresh herb Ranch for the last few years

I’m also 47. Catalina/French for life!

What’s with that really light colored, orange French? I’m down with the Catalina.

No way, I distinctly remember tv commercials for hidden valley, they showed little kids, vegetables, and...

...And seasoning packets. Shit, I'm older than bottled ranch :/

“Older than bottled ranch” should be a new slang term.

50 here. I remember when bottled ranch became available. I also remember the disappointment of it not tasting like the restaurant...

Mid to late 30’s is probably older than bottled ranch. 42 here and I damn sure am.

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The packet was invented in 54. Was first bottled in 84. Making first generation bottled ranch addicts 34 today.

http://www.advertisingweek.com/360-old/article/-a-look-back-at-hidden-valley-ranchs-10-biggest-milestones

37 here. Ranch sucks.

Thank you.

Crazy how age sneaks up on you like that, was talking with a guy after pick up hockey the other day and realized I hadn't played competitive league hockey in almost 2 decades. I had to sit for a moment and just process how old I actually was.

As I was writing my comment I noticed the 68 in your name, did some quick math and was curious if you were actually 50? Sorry if I've outted you to Reddit.

I mean he literally says he’s 47 in the comment lol

It’s my brother’s birth year. Apparently when I made the account, I wanted to be extra anonymous. Right up until I comment that I’m 47 about 722 times.

I’m the same age. My wife will buy bottled ranch. “This isn’t as good as the last time we had it.” I then shake the packet at her, “Remember we do it this way now?” I also like to get the Good Seasons dressing. It comes with a shaker!

I loved good seasons Italian dressing. I especially loved when my mom would let me make it. I was maybe 6 and I loved getting to pour the right amount of oil and I would try to get it perfectly on the line. Great memories. I should make that stuff again

You can make a great snack by popping a bag of popcorn then pouring some ranch mix into the bag and shaking it up. Delicious ranch popcorn.

What eastern part of nowhere did you live? I am couple years younger, but bottled salad dressing didn't blaze it's way into my life like electric lights.

Not ranch. Not until the 80’s. But yes, we had all the French we cared to eat.

I'm 22 and as a kid this was all my mother would make.

How do you feel about children on your lawn?

When I was a kid we had to walk uphill through the snow to get our ranch.

We had to walk downhill on the ranch to get to the snow.

Ranch is from the early 50s so we don’t have to worry about being older (I’m 44).

From the Wikipedia page: “In the early 1950s, Steve Henson developed[3] what is now known as ranch dressing while working as a plumbing contractor for three years in the remote Alaskan bush. In 1954, he and his wife Gayle opened Hidden Valley Ranch, a dude ranch at the former Sweetwater Ranch on San Marcos Pass in Santa Barbara County, California, where they served it to customers. It became popular, and they began selling it in packages for customers to take home, both as a finished product and as packets of seasoning to be mixed with mayonnaise and buttermilk. As demand grew, they incorporated Hidden Valley Ranch Food Products, Inc., and opened a factory to manufacture it in larger volumes, which they first distributed to supermarkets in the Southwest, and eventually, nationwide. In October 1972, the Hidden Valley Ranch brand was bought by Clorox for $8 million.”

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ranch_dressing

We are all ranch on this blessed day

I make ranch all the time in the restaurants ive worked in We literally use the hidden valley powdered ranch and follow the instructions, usually using just 1/2 to 2/3 the buttermilk

The guy who founded Hidden Valley is credited with developing ranch dressing so you're using the original ranch recipe really

It was literally invented at hidden valley ranch

When I was little, I thought the name of Hidden Valley Ranch was literal. I assumed no one knew where the ranch wAs and that it was deliberately hidden. I assumed there was just one dude who secretly delivered the dressings from the ranch to the grocery stores, but never told anyone where he was coming from.

True: Hidden Valley Ranch is owned by Clorox, the bleach company. Let's just say that I was told by an employee that this was significant.

How do you hide an entire valley? That’s some Black Panther shit.

Where do you think they got the idea from?

No, It was invented by Steve Henson in Alaska, literally.

Pretty sure they founded Hidden Valley Ranch a while after he had developed the sauce so I don't think it was literally invented there. But as a widespread sauce it originated at Hidden Valley Ranch when they started selling it

Been out of the kitchen for almost 5 years and I still remember the way we made packet ranch. 4 gallons of fat free buttermilk, 8 packets of ranch powder, whisk by hand. 8 gallons of heavy duty mayo, put the whisk on the Hobart and whisk until smooth. Dump into a 15 gallon Rubbermaid and cover :) we'd go through 30 gallons on a busy Friday.

we'd go through 30 gallons on a busy Friday.

America's love affair with ranch is at least partially responsible for the obesity epidemic in this country.

It's not our fault, it's physically impossible to not love ranch

My own son hates ranch. We're considering disowning him.

Considering? Wow, you guys must really love him.

I know it's going to be hard, but you know what you have to do.

I know, it's just that he's a really good kid otherwise.

That's what Ted Bundy's parents said too.

Your logic is irrefutable. Goddammit.

It's cause everyone knows that Al is the best Bundy

Hey, I get it. But if you keep him, more ranch dressing for you.

He doesn't eat ranch, though. Keeping him doesn't mean any additional ranch.

Getting rid of him would free up more resources to acquire more ranch.

Do you even ranch?

I hate ranch...you can disown me...

My daughter would brush her teeth with it if we let her.

Bleu cheese, forever!

Not a fan of sour cream and despise the taste of mayo, but I love ranch. send help

If you eat ranch then you eat mayo

So you understand my dilemma.

I fucking hate it. BBQ is the king of all sauces.

Yes officer, this one right here.

How many people did you feed a night? My restaurant serves ranch in 4oz portions and 30 gallons would be 960 portions. Not doubting you, just curious where you worked that would need that much.

Worked at a place called TacoMac for quite some time. Despite its name, it is known for wings and beer! I regularly filled 5 to 10 gallon buckets with those portion cups. Game nights, we'd have 3+ of those buckets on stand by. People fucking love ranch.

To be fair, I said 30 gallons but that recipe didn't really fill those buckets to the top. It was probably along the lines of 24 gallons. But given the huge dining room and the drive thru (fast casual diner atmosphere), we would absolutely tear through all kinds of dressing. Not sure what our raw numbers of people served were.

Interesting. That's twice as much mayo as the instructions say to use.

How much does it cost the restaurant to make all that? Cause they make it see that shit is white gold.

Job i worked at as a server we did that, but also added extra garlic, some ground pepper and dill.

I more or less recreate it at home now. :)

Dill in ranch is sooooooo good

I feel adding dill brings in a brightness that the regular ol’ Hidden Valley on the shelves of the store don’t have. Funny enough because the job I worked at the time used the dry mix.

All ranch has dill in it...

Most of it doesn’t have as a pronounced flavour in my experience could be why extra was added, though I’m not certain.

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Kraft free range egg mayonnaise, which tastes so much better than regular mayonnaise

This sounds like placebo.

I mean... free range eggs do actually taste better than regular eggs. The chickens get to roam around eating bugs and supplementary grain feed instead of the corn feed the factory farm chickens get. Mayo made from those eggs would probably taste better too. Not that I'd actually pay extra money for a condiment, fuck that.

Sure, it's the part about tasting the difference in mayo that I think is likely a placebo.

I've had some ranch before that is sort of spicy, and sometimes has red specks in it (very small). What ingredient is used in those?

You can just add a touch of cayenne pepper, chipotle pepper, or my favorite Sriracha

Srirachi ranch is definitely amazing.

Srirancha

SIRACHA CHA SLIDE YALL!

2 dips this time

Squeeze to the left

Squeeeeeeeeeeeeze to the right

Trademark that shit!

It's taken lol I've seen it at restaurants. I think mod Pizza does it.

yep, i work at mod and our srirancha is half sri, half of our ranch, put it in a bottle and shake hard lol thats why it can be inconsistent with color, everyone makes it different

Yeah, it was r/watchpeopledieinside when I asked for Sriracha to finish off my finest creation, a work of art, first time there, no big deal. He confirmed the sauce as he poured it on, and I only had time to wonder if it was a South Carolina thing, pronouncing it Srirahhcha, before I realized what had been done to my beautiful pizza. It was still good though

I was wondering why it was good but not nearly as spicy as expected

i ALWAYS do half and half exactly, but some people just a lil too much cause we dont measure or just whatevers left in a bottle. its prepped basically daily but if its SUPER off we usually do a do-over

I mean when I picked up a bottle of sri I was expected just sri, lol. Not to say it isn't good, just have to use a glob instead of a dab

Thank you for working for a magical place.

One of the only places that lets me put broccoli on my pizza.

Broccoli ricotta is awesome

its a pretty magical place to work at, tips, benefits, above minimum wage, and fantastic growth opportunities. also free pizza is lit too lol

i put broccoli on everything, smelling it when we roast it is actually hell cause i wanna eat it all

Free pizza......I'm filling out an application

Well I've never heard of Mod Pizza so their trademark doesn't count ha

I don't think you can trademark something that is in common use.

You can trademark almost anything. UPS trademarked the color brown.

Kind of a shitty trademark

A very specific color of brown, it's not like nobody else can use brown, they just can't use that specific shade.

Maybe, but they don’t say that. They just say “UPS, United Parcel Service, the UPS logo, and the color brown are trademarks of UPS”

I assume because something like hex color 644117 is kind of meaningless to most people

Maybe in their general language on their web pages, but I'm sure the legal paperwork goes into a whole lot more detail than that.

It's brown in conjunction with being a package delivery service. It doesn't mean no one else can use brown.

This one guy had an idea about Franch, but........I don't think that ever amounted to much

Srirachi and everything is amazing.

A friend of mine insisted this as well... He was drinking a berry flavored Soylent (he thinks that's a diet)... And though he proceeded to drink it after I added Sriracha, he did concede it was not amazing and did not "make everything better".

You might be amazed how often it does though!

A little in chocolate milk is nice and a smidge on vanilla ice cream and apple pie oddly kinda works too. A little bit of heat actually adds a lot to all kinds of things.

Perhaps not Berry Soylent however...

I suppose it'd still be edible, but I'd highly recommend you get a hot sauce that is more applicable for sweets than something garlicky and salty like sriracha.

Tiger Sauce.

I've never had that one before. I'll have to check it out.

The only hot sauce for sweets I've tried is Angry Hippo. It's also great on chicken.

Incredibly hot though and I wouldn't recommend it if sriracha / tobasco is all someone's had prior.

Hmm, true enough. I am thinking more generic asian chili spices than sriracha specifically I suppose.

...What?

A friend of mine insisted this as well... He was drinking a berry flavored Soylent (he thinks that's a diet)... And though he proceeded to drink it after I added Sriracha, he did concede it was not amazing and did not "make everything better".

He spiked Soylent with Sriracha

Its basically taken the place of ketchup for me, plus, I put it on things I would never put ketchup near, let alone on.

A Sriracha latte is not amazing... I was given a bottle by a customer when I worked at Starbucks because they found out I liked spicy food but hadn’t had it outside of sushi(spicy tuna). Co-worker had the bright idea of making a latte with it because, you know, we have a bottle of hot sauce and we work at Starbucks. I love hot sauce and I love garlic but I cant eat Sriracha without gagging since that experience.....

Things just tend to fast like Siracusa when I’ve had it. It’s generally just tossed on too. I’m so ‘meh’ with erything siracha these days. Like just make the food great to begin with you don’t gotta toss siracha on it necesssarily. Same goes for bacon sometimes. End rant unrelated to you.

A dude at work does make a mean siracha/thousand island combo dressing for fries though that I do quite enjoy. On par with my restaurant grade range/franks red hot combo.

Lucky charms in soy milk?

Lucky charms in sriracha

Sure, why not?

YA NEVER MIX THE CHARMS WITH A CUP OF SOY JUICE

Try it with franks red hot

Damn, recently I was eating pizza with sriracha and it touched some ranch and I thought "oh shit, I think I've just made a discovery." It looks like I'm far from the first to get there, which is good actually.

Add paprika or dehydrated red pepper flakes to that list as well. They also add some red color and a little bit of kick to a recipe.

​

Ranch dressings have quite the range of ingredients that I would call them all a ranch-style dressing rather than point to a specific recipe as THE ranch dressing.

ranch + gochujang

  • burgers: yes!
  • fries: yes!
  • salad: no.
  • pizza crust: yes!
  • anything deep fried: hell yes!

I was about to say he could add some gochugaru to it, but I don't think it would be "sort of spicy" lol

Holy shit, that's a great idea.

I think that could definitely be a yes with the right type of salad.

What about ranch + guccigang?

Try franks red hot and ranch dressing, amazing combo.

That's basically what Buffalo Wing sauce is right?

The wings are traditionally coated with a combination of Tabasco and melted butter. Frank's is that sauce premixed, basically. They are then usually dipped in ranch but blue cheese dressing is better :P

Tabasco and Frank's are fairly different.

Buffalo wings, as invented in Buffalo, NY, are tossed in butter and Frank's, and served with blue cheese dressing.

Frank's makes a premixed buffalo, but their standard hot sauce is what the original buffalo sauce was made from, not Tabasco.

I'm a fan of tossing a bit of pureed horseradish into the mix too.

We add crushed red chili flakes to get the heat and red flakes.

Chipotle ranch is my favorite. We buy a can of chipotle peppers (chipotles are dried up jalapeños, so you won’t find them fresh, fyi) purée one or two and mix with ranch at desired spiciness level.

They’re smoked as well, making them magically delicious.

There is a spicy ranch packet available. I use it for chicken salad. It's got a nice kick to it. You can usually find it on the upper shelves in the dressing aisle.

Jimmy John's adds it's cherry peppers

Ancho chille powder. 👌

Oh god that ancho chili ranch from chili’s 🤤

Riiight. Get some powder and you can't make your own at home.

This is done with cayenne pepper usually, or Tabasco sauce. There's a recipe for a Cajun sauce called remoulade that tastes similar with Tabasco sauce and mustard seeds.

If it has a slight pink tinge it may be harissa. I mix a spoonful into mayo and it creates a gorgeous sandwich topper. If you like a little tang, add ketchup, that's it.

Mix to your heart's content, I sometimes go with more harissa so it blows my teets off.

Add a little chipotle in adobo to your dressing . Comes in a small can and makes a great sandwich spread. Little goes a long way. Pretty spicy.

I really wish that stuff came in a jar. Unless you're making chili for a dozen people you never need the whole can.

Outback steakhouse ranch

Restaurant I work at uses an Avocado-chipotle ranch on top of our nachos.

I'm not a fan of a lot of the stuff we serve, but that shit is fire.

Best spicy ranch ive made is mixed with smoked paprika and cholula hot sauce 9.5/10 would dip pizza in

Cayanne powder

Try pre-mixed cajun seasoning. It's what we use at my restaurant.

You can buy mix packs of hidden valley spicy ranch too. I grab them on accident sometimes :)

Crushed red pepper. You can add a dash of whatever dried pepper you want, as some have great flavor such as the Tabasco pepper which tastes nothing like the sauce. I personally think Tabasco peppers are the best tasting pepper, and just a pinch can make box mac and cheese a gourmet side.

Cholula is the key to spicy ranch and mayo. Sriracha too sweet.

They have packets of the spicy ranch. My husband is addicted to spicy ranch sour cream dip.

Manager at Jimmy John's here, we make our Kickin Ranch with everything you would normally use, but we blend buttermilk, cherry peppers, and cherry pepper juice and stir it in to give it a little kick!

Crushed red pepper flakes.

Probably not the exact same thing, but there's a southwestern style ranch that has taco seasoning added. But you'd probably be able to tell.

I recommend adding tapatio. It mixed the best with ranch.

1 gallon regular ranch + 1 7oz can chipotle peppers in adobo sauce (pureed)

Probably paprika

Red Chili Flakes (think pizza)

Mate, it's cooking. You make a batch according to directions.

After that, split it into a bunch of different ones and add ingredients.

I recently did that with the kids. We added stuff to french toast until they found spices they liked.

It might be peppercorn ranch. That’s pretty common

Hidden Valley Dips Mix https://amzn.to/2SdyoaJ

Best dip ever. Trust me I'm a fat guy

The one that specifically indicates “buttermilk” on the label is the one you’ll want to get.

Is this because it already has some of its own buttermilk flavoring, or does it react differently with buttermilk compared to the regular packets?

Honestly I’m not certain, but I notice an unmistakable difference. Now that you ask though, I’m thinking it could be in my head 🤔

Buttermilk, mayo, salt, cafe grind black pepper, onion powder, garlic powder, pinch of cayanne powder. Boom, restaraunt ranch with even less spending than buying the packets.

Please note that i was used to prepping this shit by the gallon, and i've been out of the food industry for 2-3 years so i don't remember the exact measurements.

Similar recipe to the place I worked except add sour cream and powdered mustard!

Oh shit, i forgot the sour cream! It's been awhile since i got out of the restaraunt industry and i've gottwn sketchy on the recipes

Parsley? I know parsley is a key ingredient in the original

Wasn't in the recipe at the restaraunt i was at

Buttermilk, mayo, salt, cafe grind black pepper, onion powder, garlic powder, pinch of cayanne powder. Boom, restaraunt ranch with even less spending than buying the packets.

You're forgetting dill and parsley. Remember Ranch almost always has some green in it.

Restaraunt i worked in used neither of those

This is the answer! My grandmother always made ranch for me when she made fried chicken, and I’ve always considered it to be the best ranch I’ve ever had. She literally just used the Hidden Valley packs but always used buttermilk with the mayo since she had it on hand for biscuit and pancakes.

Good memories :)

Can confirm, I work at a diner and I see them mix ranch all of the time. It never really occurred to me that this is why their ranch tastes really good. Now I just need to find out how they make their burgers so damn good every time

Add in sour cream also and it gets even better.

Just to add another “tip” to the top comment...well blended cottage cheese thickens the hell out of restaurant ranch also. Just be careful since if you don’t do it well enough it’ll look rotten.

I actually kinda like how runny restauraunt ranch is compared to hidden valley's gloopy stuff.

That's working in the wrong direction imo, ranch is best when runny

Why don’t they just sell that in stores?

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That’s the key. It’s about double the price and has a short shelf life, but is so much better.

Yes, the preservatives in the stuff they keep on the shelves seem to give it an “off” taste to me that the refrigerated/fresh stuff does not seem to have.

Lite House original ranch is so good! They changed it for a minute last spring to "Sweet ranch", but went back to the original recipe. It wasn't as good. It's so good to just dip pepperoni slices in it.

It's so good to just dip pepperoni slices in it.

Goddammit, I need to get off this thread, y'all are going to get me in trouble.

Lighthouse brand in the glass jars is my go to! (might be regional?)

The product has to be shelf stabilized which means making it more acidic which negatively affects the taste compared to the kind your mix yourself.

They do, just in the refrigerated section.

It expires too quickly for it to be worth it.

Why don’t they sell Jack in the Box’s buttermilk ranch by the gallon?

You can make ranch without "ranch powder" too.

But it's generally not worth it, the hidden valley powder is so good and so cheap, it's not worth stocking all the ingredients and tinkering with portions

The ingredients are stuff most folks already have, but it's still hard to get the proportions exact.

Penzeys has the best spice blend for making ranch I've ever had, sorry packet!

And MSG

https://www.sciencefriday.com/articles/is-msg-bad-for-your-health/

Thanks for posting this. MSG gets such a bad rep.

What's wrong with MSG?

Nothing, racism

...what?

https://www.smithsonianmag.com/arts-culture/its-the-umami-stupid-why-the-truth-about-msg-is-so-easy-to-swallow-180947626/

TLDR; we love msg in Doritos, but god forbid it’s in Chinese food or you’ll get Chinese Restaurant Syndrome.

I'm not reading all that lol, MSG isn't racist

MSG isn’t, but being anti-msg may be when it’s willingly devoured in things like ranch and Doritos, but shunned in Asian foods

Jesus Christ give me a break

Why do you think people like it in one context but not the other then?

They don't, why do you think non Asian food is labeled "MSG free"?

Oh but I forgot, everyone's racist and that explains everything 🙄

Context helps, read the article if you’d like to understand the history behind it. It’s a worthwhile five minutes.

Holy shit I can know expiration dates of foods I make by going off the expiration of the ingredients... Life changed.

I don’t know how true this is cause I make Blue Cheese at home with Cream and Sour Cream and Blue Cheese crumbles and it always goes bad before the expiration dates on the individual products. It may be exposing everything to the air as you mix it all together...I dunno. But the dressing I make lasts like a week tops.

Yeah I think your comment makes more sense. Back to questioning my leftovers.

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Why the buttermilk packet? For taste, or because it reacts differently with buttermilk compared to the normal packets?

Not totally sure. Just know it tastes better!

Awesome thank you, I will definitely try this!

I highly, highly recommend this ranch recipe from Serious Eats.

Ranch = fat and sadness. Got it.

I was surprised at how alright the fat-free stuff was. I usually use ranch as a hot-sauce diluter/delivery medium and it wasn't bad at all with pizza or chicken and I knew I was dodging a lot of calories by using the sans-fat version.

I knew I was dodging a lot of calories by using the sans-fat version.

Nope. Fat-free != lower calories.

In this case it does. 2 tablespoons of fat free ranch is 30 calories, regular is 140, according to the internet. Yes fat free doesn't mean fewer calories, but you didn't take what he said in context. He was specifically talking about ranch.

!!!!!!! You have no idea how much better you have just made my life

Wait a fucking minute? You’re telling me every restaurant does this?! I thought it was just something the restaurant I work at does!

I make mine in a mason jar. Just add everything in and shake it up.

Uncle Dan’s!

Also, throw bleu cheese chunks in that and you got badass bleu cheese dressing!

No, then you'd have ranch blue cheese. If you did the mayo/buttermilk/sour cream blend, and then added blue cheese, salt and pepper, and a bit of vinegar and ground mustard, you have blue cheese dressing.

Not that blue cheese in ranch sounds bad...

I've never heard of ranch bleu cheese, that must be a thing from your area. The "salt and pepper, and a bit of vinegar and ground mustard " part is just a difference in preparation, not a requirement for bleu cheese. And OP was asking about why ranch tasted different in a restaurant and the answer is mayo and buttermilk. I was assuming it was obvious that I meant add bleu cheese chunks to the mayo and buttermilk and leave out the "ranch powder packet", but even then that ranch packet is just a collection of spices likely including salt and pepper and ground mustard so I don't know what you're on about.

I guess it wasn't obvious to me that you didn't mean to throw blue cheese in as well as the ranch spices, but I'm stoned. And no, they don't have blue cheese ranch here either. I get your point that since you add spices, and the ranch packet is just spices, it's not a huge difference, too, although I think the particular ranch spices blend might be weird with bc.

Tell you what, regardless I want Ranch flavored Doritos and a joint right now.

Restaurant owner. The buttermilk is the key. We would use the thickest available to get the creamy texture.

And if you don’t have buttermilk, you can make some with whole milk and vinegar. Might not taste exactly the same though. I use that for baking. But it’s real easy.

Seriously, super easy and tastes GREAT. I also add a little more mayo and maybe take out a little buttermilk so it’s thicker.

Aww shit, you may have just ruined chicken wings for me.

Eli5 inception....why is ranch powder usually on the top shelf?

Because they'd rather the best visual real estate be given to the more expensive premade dressings.

To keep it away from the shorties

A friend of mine made a GALLON of it for me for my birthday once.

one million upvotes

In a similar vein: Penzey's makes an herb blend for green goddess dressing. Mix it with some mayo and apple cider vinegar to make the best fucking salad dressing I have ever had.

Buttttteeeeeermilk

Hijacking the top comment to add something that I haven't seen anywhere else in this thread: I worked at a place that made ranch dressing from scratch, key ingredient is red wine vinegar. Kicks up the acidity and makes it tangy. Also helps if you use fresh dill, but not nearly as important as the vinegar is.

I also found some places use the litehouse homestyle ranch but either way was super close to restuarant quality.

I want to also add that the component ingredients are cheap enough that you can make over a gallon of betterranch for the cost equivalent of a larger bottle of premade ranch dressing.

This ranch will only last as long as the expiration date on the buttermilk. Enjoy!

How do you know when it's gone bad?

Hypothetically, of course. It's hard to imagine a scenario where a container of ranch lasts long enough in my fridge to spoil. Maybe if immediately after preparing it I fell violently ill and had to spend months in the hospital, but even then I'd send someone to retrieve it for me.

This ranch will only last as long as the expiration date on the buttermilk

And most buttermilk in stores is really close to when it'll taste too sour.

Even better, instead of the ranch packet, use garlic powder, dill, chives and black pepper.

So no bodily fluids?

I asked my local family diner what kind they used & they said they use the Hidden Valley packages.

Ranch at a restaurant is made with mayo and buttermilk. You can make restaurant quality ranch at home! All you need to do is buy the ranch powder packet, usually on the top shelf above the dressings, and follow the instructions by adding mayo and buttermilk. Voila! Ranch made the exact same way restaurants make it.* This ranch will only last as long as the expiration date on the buttermilk. Enjoy!

* some

I didn't think buttermilk expired. It's already soured milk lmao.

Crazy how something as good as ranch is made with something as awful, disgusting, and evil like mayo. But it is basically fat

Or, even better, skip packet food altogether and look up a recipe online that uses fresh ingredients.

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I was the official ranch maker of several casual dining restaurants in my youth. Packet, mayo, buttermilk, stir, date....it was delicious.

If ranch isn’t an option, it’s not fine dining as far as I’m concerned

Chili's makes ranch by hand because they have a few different varieties. Regular, ancho ranch, and avocado ranch. If we ordered it all, it would be cost prohibitive.

You could not be more incorrect. I have worked in dives and fine dining as a cook. Every place made their own ranch.

You're just not in the right restaurants then. Where I work we make our ranch fresh pretty much everyday using the hidden valley packets. It's really quick too.

If you got ranch dressing form Sysco, you didn’t work at a fine dining restaurant.

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Nah. You’d just call it green goddess.

Yes, of course, because your experience is the only experience

Awesome, got a recipe for thousand island? That always tastes better too.

Mix mayo, ketchup, and pickle relish.

add salt and white vinegar too

I like this 1000 Island Dressing:

1/2 teaspoon garlic paste

1/4 teaspoon salt

3/4 cup mayonnaise

1-2 tablespoons bottled chili sauce (like Sirachi or a sweet chili garlic, your pick)

1/4 cup ketchup

1 1/2 tablespoons minced onion

2 teaspoons sweet pickle relish

1 hard-cooked large egg, finely chopped

Ground black pepper (to taste)

Should say "Black pepper. No, more than that."

Black pepper loses intensity pretty fast as the flavor-carrying oils dilute into the dressing, so you actually want it to be too peppery when you taste it while making it.

Nooooo!!! Ranch is so much simpler to make. Its butter milk, mayo, dill, and minced garlic. If you want it thinner, do more butter milk, otherwise equal portions by volume with the dill and garlic to taste.

I hated making ranch when I waited tables. If I recall it was something like 6-8 jugs of buttermilk, I honestly don’t remember how many huge restaurant size jars of mayo and then literally just one small ass packet of seasoning.

Took forever for little 5’ me to lug all that stuff from the walk ins to a counter and get it mixed in a big vat.

It was a wing place so we went through a lot of ranch.

...a lot of the places down where I live use large tubs of Ken's brand Ranch....

​

But the Ken's brand ranch in the grocery store does not taste anything like the huge canisters received via restaurant direct stored in walk-in coolers.

​

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I coulda used this comment over in r/bartenders today haha. Yeah, preservatives and stabilizers do change the product. And not for the better.

All pickled foods would like to have a word with you

How often do you pickle your salad dressings?

Legit laughed out loud

Pickled foods aren't sold as "cucumbers" and "eggs". They are specifically sold as pickles and pickled eggs. It isnt the same thing.

Alternatively, think about it this way. If someone was buying hardboiled eggs and they had an option between their packs that expire in a few days, or a jar of boiled eggs that will last years before opening, and they expected a fresh, hard-boiled egg taste, they are going to be mighty disappointed in that jar of eggs.

The refrigerated ranch is typically shipped and stored non-refrigerated, and displayed in the refrigerated case to add appeal. If you check, they will usually say “refrigerate after opening”

It's telling you that the ranch used to be refrigerated, but it still is, too.

Seriously though, why wouldn't it say "refrigerate after opening" either way? Would they really waste refrigerated display space on something that doesn't need it?

If it’s refrigerated prior, it will just say “keep refrigerated.” (I work in food distribution, these are my most fun facts)

I appreciate your fun facts! Everyone in my life is about to learn them too, I'm 99% sure they're gonna be delighted

Yes they would.. definitely.

Did you know that UHT milk doesn't need to be refrigerated until after opening? Crazy but it's true. But they need to put all the UHT milk in the fridge area cause otherwise no one would buy it.

In the UK it's kept on a normal non-refridgerated shelf near the tea bags.

Unrefrigerated milk? That's fucking insane in the membrane.

It's the same milk you buy. Unless you have cows or something

Yup. Same in Vietnam. That's how I know this.

Interesting. So I wonder how much better milk would taste without UHT? Would it be analogous to homemade ranch vs. store ranch?

Most milk in the states isn't UHT. (ultra high temperature). The cheap grocery store brand milk isn't UHT and does need to be refrigerated.

It's the more expensive organic ones that are UHT and wouldn't need to be refrigerated until after opening.

Again interesting. After (admittedly very little) research, organic food, specifically milk, appears to only have the added benefit of being more expensive (if that's your thing).

Because they can mark it up since it’s near the salad mix and people are too lazy to walk to compare prices.

This may be the case for some brands (Marie's, you nasty) but for other brands (Marzetti) the difference is worth the price. I don't know if theyre all shelf stable or not, but I legitimately can not stand any of the shelf stable bottles and most o the fridge section jars are a solid 8/10 or higher.

Which ones? I know Marie's, Marzetti's, Lighthouse, Makoto, and Bolthouse all say keep refrigerated, and those are the only ones at my store.

And soybean oil. Almost every shelf stable salad dressing is mostly soybean oil.

Yah but even the ranch they sell in the cooler sucks

Yes, I had this discussion last night with my step-mother. We're both ranch snobs, and there are simply no grocery store ranches— refrigerated or not— that are as good as restaurant / homemade ranch.

Ummmm you only keep the ranch and other dressing in the walk in/reach in after it’s been opened. Otherwise it’s room temp....and/or whatever the temp in the delivery truck was.

Source: restaurant employee for 10+ years

Still love restaurant ranch though. It is so much better.

Um, I also have over a decade in food service and I have never worked in a restaurant that buys shelf stable ranch. Anyplace remotely self aware made it from scratch and the volume chain restaurants bought it in cases of 4 1 gallon jugs that all required refridgeration. Perhaps wherever.you work is either buying crappy dressing or practicing poor food safety?

Ha maybe a bit of both!

I’ve worked in places that made their own ranch, I’ve also worked at places that bought the big ole ken’s....and places that bought the really off brands. Over all, in my experience, the big ole fuckers sit in dry storage until opened. The places that make their own ranch refrigerate and date of course. I’ve worked at places, corporate nation wide places, like jimmy johns for example, that do the same thing with mayo.

For the record though, regarding jimmy johns, I’ve worked at two completely different locations, over 1000 miles away from each other. Hands down, one of the cleanest places.

Real talk. This has bothered me for years, i love the kens restaurant ranch. The closest thing I've found is kens buttermilk ranch. Still not the same but it's closer.

It's such a weird thing, they're completely different textures to me even.

I always assumed it was preservatives and stabilizers since it probably sits in the bottle for a long time before even getting to the shelf, then has to sit there for months.

Chances are excellent that you've got a restaurant supply place near you who also deals with the general public. They'll be able to get you what you want.

Warning: The last time I had this brilliant idea I wound up with six gallons of mustard, but it was only a little over $20 and they had it the next day.

very true, I even know a couple restaurant owners that would easily order it for me too but then I have a gallon of ranch in my fridge that will expire way before I use it lol

There honey mustard sucks though :( my favorite chicken place switched over to their honey mustard.

Same with the blue cheese. Ken's big tub tastes way more mild than in the smaller Ken's containers sold in stores. It's almost like a different product.

FTFY: It is a different product

It's either blue cheese with wings or go fuck your mother.

Im from buffalo, you don't have to tell me. Ranch with wings is some fucked up repugnant shit.

Yessssss. Have been sad about this for YEARS

Try rooties blue cheese if they have it where you are.

Edit: nevermind I guess its only local (I'm in Buffalo)

Damn, where can I buy the better version?

I would try restaurant supply stores some are open to the public.

Kens makes at least a half dozen different Ranch dressings that they sell in big 1 gallon tubs.

They are numbered. Like “ranch 789” “ranch 889” If you ask a knowledgeable and/or helpful employee at a restaurant they can tell you exactly what they are buying. It says it on the tub. They don’t have to be involved in buying the stuff.

Of course, you probably still can’t easily buy the stuff.

I hated pouring anything out of those gallon vat containers...

Watered down Ken's ranch was the secret at a cafe I worked at.

watered down? damn, the ones in the tub are pretty liquid-y to begin with.

Ours made vats from the powder stuff. Then again, we sold HELLA wings. If it needs to stay in the fridge, it's the bomb.

I know there's one brand that is kept fridged in the produce section. I have no idea what the name is but it's pricy and delicious as all get up.

Lighthouse? I have a co-worker who basically would drink the stuff if she could. She brings a new jar every week.

Jar? Like talenti ice cream style jar? Just a weird squat spherical prism? (oh my God I get to use that term out of geometry. Yay!) Yes! That stuff is amazing!

I just checked the size. Yes, a 13 oz jar. I'd be more interested if it were talenti. That stuff is delicious.

Talenti already fattens us with desserts from the gods. If they made dressings and other things, I'd need to buy stock. -3-

Oh well, I still buy Ken's Ranch.

Buttermilk Mayo Onion Powder Garlic Powder Pepper Salt Parsley

Add enough buttermilk to the consistency you like ranch and then just add a little bit of the spices to taste. Best homemade ranch.

This person ranches.

3/4 cup sour cream 1/2 cup mayo 1 cup buttermilk 1/2 tsp salt and white pepper 1/8 tsp cayenne 1/2 tsp garlic powder 1 tsp onion powder 1 tsp dried chive 1 tsp dried parsley 1 tbsp fresh garlic 1 tbsp lemon juice 1 tbsp red wine vinegar

One of the only recipes in the entire thread. Sorry, but great restaurant ranch doesn’t include hidden valley ranch packets!

Additionally, adding sour cream and mayo will add the creaminess that buttermilk does without the acidity.

Ah yes, a recipie without measurements.

no way, we use hidden valley ranch CONTAINERS :p

Finally a real recipe that doesn't require some packet. I also add sour cream, dill, and white pepper, but everyone should feel free to experiment with what they prefer.

Thyme is a key flavor of Ranch dressing, rooted to its origin. Can't leave it out if you're making from scratch.

Citric acid and/or sodium diacetate if you want it to have a bit of a kick.

I just throw a little bit of everything in until it tastes good. You just gotta practice!

Buy a non-shelf-stable ranch dressing in the refrigerator compartment (usually near where they keep the packaged salads and so forth). Litehouse and Marie's, for two examples, make great ranch dressings that taste like homemade (or restaurant) ranch. The non-refrigerated stuff has tons of stabilizers and gum product and chemicals to keep it shelf-stable.

Litehouse tastes nothing like restaurant ranch sir.

Oh, sorry. I just happen to like Likehouse. I even was up in Sandpoint Idaho once and visited their factory! They had a "tour" which, it turned out, was a room with a window into the factory, that's it. But to be honest I'm a blue cheese cultist and that's the dressing of theirs that I like. As a lesser ranch afficionado, I must defer to you my good sir.

I came here to say this! I also enjoy Litehouse. Funny enough it doesn't taste exactly like restaurant ranch but it is definitely closer than most. Litehouse happens to be a little sweeter and has chunks of veggies like celery.

Litehouse Jalapeno Ranch and Cotija Cilantro are amazing store bought dressings.

I work in a kitchen at large business HQ, roughly 1000 people on campus. We go thru Ranch like water. It's Hidden Valley packets and you just follow the recipe. IMO it's not as good as Litehouse, it ok, but maybe that's the Idaho in me.

Had no idea that stuff was made in Sandpoint

the best part is they make a big deal out of their "tour"--it's only at certain hours, etc. So I wasn't expecting Willy Wonka, but you know, a tour through a factory. They ushered us into this room .... we waited for a guide....minutes pass.... and NOTHING!!! Were we trapped in some sort of torture chamber???? Then we realized, looking through the window at a small-scale series of mixing machines (which weren't even in operation).... THAT WAS THE TOUR. Sandpoint is something else. Still, their salad dressing is EVERYTHING.

Oh I’m definitely suckering my friends into doing the tour next summer after a day at the lake.

“Hey isn’t Laughing Dog the other way?”

“Yeah, instead we’re gonna go see where they make those dressing packets you get with gas station salads!”

Grab some cheese curds when you're in the shop. Their fresh cheddar curds are great snacks.

You can’t cop out of a poor taste in ranch with a good taste in blue cheese dressing (Litehouse blue cheese is amazing though). That’s not how life works.

Indeed, I bow my head in shame, and defer to you and Diegobyte, can I ever be redeemed, I beg of you, and will not even mention Thousand Island

If you live relatively close to Sandpoint (basically anywhere in the PNW) you owe it to yourself to try Uncle Dan's Original Southern ranch dressing mix, which is made in Spokane. It blows shelf stable, refrigerated, and Hidden Valley packet ranch out of the water, even if you don't use buttermilk.

Thank you. I actually live in LA (and can recommend all kinds of taco trucks and homemade salsas haha) but will totally remember that the next time I'm up in Spokane, that sounds AWESOME!

My blood type is practically Litehouse Big Blue+

​

(and yes I'm a normal sized human with great health stats, calm down)

Have to agree. I tried every ranch at the store looking for the restaurant taste. Had to make it myself. Litehouse tasted like wishbone. Not too good especially for the price.

Ugh yes. Lighthouse ranch. I kid you not, I just ate a giant bowl of veggies because they were the vehicle to get that Lighthouse ranch into my mouth.

It's when you use the celery like a spoon and just use it to get the ranch and don't actually eat the celery that you need to do some soul searching

TesseMae's is the best refrigerated bottled ranch.

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Litehouse is famous for their Blue Cheese dressing and when it was still inexpensive to make, Roquefort dressing. Try their Big Blue dressing. By comparison, the ranch is just so-so.

If you ever go to a traditional fine dining restaurant that serves 1960s era dishes, El Gaucho in Seattle comes immediately to mind, see if they serve Roquefort dressing. You will never want to go back to Blue Cheese dressing. Unfortunately, Roquefort cheese is very expensive in the US.

Don’t forget boogers and cum

Marie's has a weird aftertaste to me, but Marzetti is so frigging good.

oh I never saw that here in Los Angeles, will look for it! Another thing I really like is to get blue cheese crumbles from TJ's, dress the salad with oil and balsamic vinegar and salt and pepper and then add the blue cheese crumbles. Yum!

I'm not a big vinegar person, so rather than a vinaigrette, what I'll do is use lemon juice or berries, a dash of sugar, and feta cheese. Very good on spinach or some other soft green. <3

Feta cheese is also awesome! Have you tried a really good balsamic vinegar? They are really deep flavored and almost sweet. I really like this one https://calolea.com/shop/balsamic-vinegar/

Same with Caesar dressing. Store bought Caesar tastes nothing like the Caesar supplied to restaurants. It's too vinegary. At my old restaurant they'd come in huge squeeze bottles. I used fill a large mixing bowl with fries and douse it in the Caesar dressing. So fucking good. Ranch and cheese on fries is also fucking good.

Try out Newmans own creamy Caeser.

Yeah this shit is bomb

They are also a Non-Profit.

The best Blue Cheese and only blue cheeze ill buy is Marzettis. Their shit is amazing. Chunky Blue Cheese or Ultimate Blue Cheese, both so good.

Blue cheese had mold in it.

What’s your point?

Blue cheese has mold in it.

As is their southwestern

Yep, all of Newmans products are the shit. That Caesar/Italian dressing is better than most restaurants imo

Kroger brand “Simply organic” Caesar is pretty good too!

I'm partial to the House Caesar. Love that brand!

After Hidden Valley I've been a fan of Newman's ranch for store bought since the 90s but never tried the Caesar. Will have to check it out.

Just tastes like creamy (insert other creamy salad dressing here).

Cardini's is the shit though.

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No. And the hype about saturated fat being bad for you was proven a myth. So you need to change your perception.

[deleted]

Again, you're an idiot. You're citing an article that claims low-fat is bad because they add sugar. Who is talking about low-fat labels? No one.

Ok so calories are the the basis for weight gain and losing weight. 2 tbsp is 170 calories. Added into a bowl of romaine lettuce, cherry tomatoes, and chicken, you could even go fucking nuts and put a dash of parmesan on there and you still arent coming close to breaking a 2000 calorie a day limit, and keeping it around 500 calories per meal.

Find another thing to be angry about you fucking douche.

My favorite go to question when in a "good" restruarant is to ask if the Caesar has anchovies. If they go all sorts of weird I get what they're up to... lol

Good Caesar dressing is amazing. Kraft is just ok but good to eat nonetheless.

https://www.bonappetit.com/recipe/classic-caesar-salad

Our Caesar salad was "traditional" so it was garnished with a "X" of two anchovy fillets, but these days in Australia it's almost impossible to find a Caesar with anchovies. Most places don't even bother with egg anymore. But they love adding chicken. Old fashioned is frowned upon. Can't remember the last time I got an order for a Waldorf.

Mmm. Now I want a Waldorf salad.

Yeah, Waldorf salads are dope.

Any restaurant using out-of-house made dressing on their Cesar salad should just take the salad off the menu. Properly, it's made tableside-- though that hasn't been the convention in many years.

To be fair it wasn't a fine dining establishment, so customers weren't expecting steak tartare made tableside etc.

Sure. I get it, people like a Cesar salad. But the salad is nothing but Romaine, croutons, and dressing. And the dressing is nothing but mayo, lemon, Worcestershire, anchovy paste, and salad oil (you can probably get away with Canola). The only thing that costs anything is the lemons, and you can sub them out for bottled cut with white wine vinegar.

if you're not putting it together in front of the customer, you can still make the dressing in house with comfortable margins. The value on the "we make all dressings in house" statement has got to be more than the savings from using store-bought Cesar dressing on bagged Romaine lettuce tossed with shredded cheese and packaged croutons, right? Or are customers just that undiscriminating? I'd believe it if they were, but yikes. I don't order salads in restaurants where the dressings aren't homemade.

Litehouse makes a dressing called Caesar Caesar that is sold to restaurants in a giant squeeze bottle and in a glass jar to consumers. I often use it as a dipping sauce as it is just so good and is literally the dressing that many restaurants use. You can put it on almost anything.

Brianna’s Caesar is the best store bought Caesar I’ve found!

Freshly made, it’s super easy to do at home it just won’t last nearly as long so use it up quick.

If it lasts for such a short amount of time why does the local diner hoard that shit like it's liquid gold? Even when I say I'll pay for it they seem reluctant. Is it because it only gets made in large batches and they want to make sure it lasts till the next batch?

Simple cost cutting. Mayo and buttermilk aren't the cheapest things. They're trying to stretch it out.

Everyone loves ranch

As someone who works in a restaurant, servers are just lazy and they have to put it in a ramekin during slower times (when it’s busy someone will just tee at 50 or whatever at the start and then top up when that amount runs out)

This just gave me flashbacks to filling hundreds of hot sauce cups at Taco John’s....

We never sold our dressings at the restaurant I worked at in college because of the shelf life. It would cause more harm than good to sell you a bunch of dressing you have to toss in two or three days.

Where do you live? I’ve never experienced this

They feel bad for making you pay for a dressing because they think you'll skimp on the tip because you don't really think you should have to pay for dressing, despite you saying that it's okay. So they try to find some middle ground where they can give you just enough where you'll be happy but it won't be so much that the chef will insist you get charged.

It takes a couple of weeks for fresh ranch to go bad. Most places will go through a batch or two per day. They're not worried about throwing any away.

at our place 4 oz cost 80 cents (half bowl). Thats $3.20 for 16 oz, when Kraft costs maybe $2.50? So not that much more. Esp considering that we make it fresh (labor) and have to store in refrigerated,(storage and energy) and also it expires (food waste) . A small side wont be charged for (2 oz) But thats a bit why its costs a bit.

Because its already turned bad and they dont want to serve it.

Any self-respecting American will use it up in time.

Also made with a lot more fat.

This is one reason why a lot of restaurant food tastes better. MOAR BUTTER

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EGbRwUojtcw

The amount of salt too. A lot of people way under season their food

fat isn't necessarily bad for you on it's own.

No it's delicious. But have you seen the calorie count on a restaurant salad? They are obscene.

I have. They are. I’m a low carb eater so I never pay attention to that number personally

Yeah, when you realize it's 99.5% mayo/buttermilk it really loses some of it's attraction. I wouldn't say the bottled stuff is "healthier" by any means, unless it's fat free....even then, yuck!

​

EDIT: I'm not afraid of fat, it's just off putting if you've ever glugged buttermilk into a gallon vat of "heavy duty" restaurant mayo. My apologies I forgot how passionate people are about their ranch. The yuck was directed at "fat free" which lacks in taste and has additional gross ingredients.

Why you afraid of fat?

The sugar in the bottled garbage is what should concern people.

It is the quality/type of fat that is the worry.

As long as it’s not transfats right? I thought the latest evidence shows there is no real relation between saturated fat and heart disease and all that stuff. What do I know. I eat very lean.

Without even getting into saturated fats...

It is refined fats that are so bad. Oils that are oxidized, rancidified, and deodorized. Heated and treated with nasty chemicals like benzene, and so on.

For refined oils, cold, expeller pressed are the best. But better still just to eat whole fat sources: avocados, nuts, seeds, olives, etc.

(And yes, trans fats are extremely bad)

What fats are oxidized and deodorized? Does the olive oil I buy at the store fall into this category?

Olive oil is crazy. A large part of foreign olive oils are actually hazelnut oil treated with chlorophyl (oil pirating is a real thing).

But in general, you want extra virgin olive oil. If you can find it in a not-clear bottle, even better, but that isn't a usual thing.

But in cheaper olive oils, this is also part of the process:

Finally, possible additional processing steps include refining the oil to reduce its acidity and improve flavor (in defective oils) by alkali (chemical reaction with an alkali – caustic soda) or steam processing; bleaching the oil to reduce chlorophyll, carotenoids, residual fatty acids, and pesticides using diatomaceous earth, activated carbon, or synthetic silica treatment, and deodorization to reduce odors with the use of activated carbon. Needless to say, these steps are only used for low quality oil.

But no matter what process all the oils with be oxidized to some extent just being exposed to air (deodorized is usually for shelf-stable "vegetable oil" which are made to rot, so they can no longer go bad, the cleaned.)

In general, no oil is a health food (except maybe flax!) Of the oils, and extra virgin olive oil is best, but use sparingly.

Fat isn't bad for you, but oils are a refined food that have been stripped of fiber, protein, and vitamins and minerals.

ain't nothing wrong with saturated fats either!

I don’t think that is confirmed. Some saturated fats may be better than others.

Not if you Keto.

It's not like you're eating a gallon of it, though

Sure...of COURSE not...*looks around nervously*

So, ...i've followed keto pretty extensively, and I kwow this is anecdotal, but while lifting and eating lean, with high fats (....that were healthy, no momounsaturated or the like) ...i've lost so much weight.

I look for sugars and primarily, when I do ingredient drive, sugar ...and starch, and substitutes of both It's a bit more expensive but, any keto book actually praises homemade mayos, oil dressings, and the like.

Interesting comment about olive oil, though. I switched to sunflower oil for those issues.

Interestingly, certain ingredients are FDA approved while being rubbish. Look for "flavors", "natural flavors" "dye for coloring" and any ambiguous additive and typically it is a multitude of chemicals for that "additional color or flavor".

Sorry, r/foundthemobileuser, know, monounstaurated

Real buttermilk is the liquid leftover when you make butter. The butter has all the fat and the buttermilk is basically fat free.

I guess it was the industrial vats of "heavy duty" restaurant mayo I found off putting. I would like to take this opportunity to apologize to ranch enthusiasts, RIP inbox. :)

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You're really....rude. They reason I said yuck, is that shelf stable, fat free products are gross. Thanks for condescendingly delivering basic food knowledge.

[deleted]

You caught me, I'm just a marketing shill for the billion dollar "fat free" food industry. I'm glad you were able to clarify what I was trying to accomplish and let me know I'm "special".

Yeah, much better than the shelf- stable crap.

You honestly should just buy the ranch spices and milk and mayo. You’ll get incredibly great ranch. I used to make buckets of it at a pizza place. It’s as fresh as the buttermilk and tastes so good. The stores ranch has vinegar and other things that don’t make ranch. It also has preservatives so they can try and sell it for 3 months. A lot of them are also “diet” which means they perform some process to take the fat out. Super nasty but hopefully now you’re all the wiser.

Fyi to take fat out they often just add water and thicken the mix with xanthan gum.

Most "lite" products ( mayo & what-not) add sugar or some other sweetener to "try" to make it taste better. Taste test lite mayo & regular mayo side by side...lite is a little sweeter.

That is another reason I hate bottled HVR (I'm not even talking about lite...I'm talking about regular)...it is sweeter than "home" made stuff...fucking disgusting.

Same question, but with honey mustard. In restaurants you get a creamy goodness, but when you buy in store you get a weird thick amalgamation of actual honey and regular yellow mustard.

Make it yourself... it's honey, mustard and the secret ingredient ~wait for it~ mayonnaise. Mayo is what makes it tastes like the restaurants.

And mayo was the answer to what makes restaurant ranch so good... I’m noticing a theme here

It seems mayo is gods gift to sauces and con diments. I cant stand mayo but itself but love all its subsidiaries. Ranch and taco bell quesadilla sauce especially.

Mayo is ridiculously easy to make. I use a stick blender in a large plastic cup.

And Lard is why Grandma's baked goods trade better than anything else.

leaf lard 😅

So that's why it turns that weird clear greenish color when you leave it in your fridge for a week

Mayo and oil to emulsify. At least, that’s how we do it

And if you want the kind with the red specks, it's cayenne. You can use Dijon, but really it's usually cayenne.

so what im getting from this comments section is adding mayo to everything makes it better

Yeah but it can be a little hard to do at home. I always fuck up the mixture, then I have to add extra of other ingredients and I end up with way more than I need.

No. The secret ingredients are good mustard and good honey. Ffs. Are you trying to eat honey mustard or dijonnaise?

O'charleys is the closest thing to restaurant honey mustard.

I wish their ranch was half as good as their honey mustard. Even in the restaurant, their ranch tastes store-bought.

Here you go man

1 part Dijon mustard. 2 parts Mayo. 1 part “Actual” Honey .15 parts White pepper .15 parts Apple cider vinegar

Ratios are an approximation. Add until desirable taste is acquired. That’s restaurant honey mustard. I like a bit more Dijon than the ratio above suggests, which is based on a recipe from a restaurant. Try it out man

Are you trying honey mustard from the condiments section or the salad dressing section? If you want something like restaurant honey mustard you should get the dressing, not the dip.

Sweet Baby Ray's honey mustard tastes just like restaurant honey mustard to me. It's near the BBQ sauce.

Agreed. I went through so many bottles of shitty honey mustard, but when I found that stuff it was game over. I went through the bottle within a week my first time it was that good.

Honey mustard is a very simple list of ingredients. A combination of yellow and Dijon mustard, mayo, honey, cayenne, and rice vinegar. I don't have the specs in my memory right now but if you want a recipe let me know and I will share.

Restraunt =Honey+mayo+mustard+other spices.(likely apple vinegar and salt) Mayo makes it creamy. I make it non creamy at home, its only 25-40 cals( very similar taste, just not texture). At work its 150 cals for the same amount.

The mayo changes it from shitty, sweet yellow mustard to that godly restaurant honey mustard.

I’ll just leave this here. It’s amazing! Add cayenne to taste for a spicy version.

https://topsecretrecipes.com/outback-steakhouse-ranch-salad-dressing-copycat-recipe.html

Thanks I’ll have to try this :)

Don't know if that recipe is any good or not, but it's wrong.

Equal parts mayo and buttermilk. Don't use a ranch packet - instead, use garlic powder, onion powder, paprika, black pepper, and some cayenne if you want a little kick. Worked at Outback for 5 years (FOH).

My memory may be a little hazy here (I haven't worked there in over 10 years), so it's possible my recipe is incorrect. It could also be 2 to 1 mayo to buttermilk and sour cream, but that doesn't sound familiar. I'll reach out to some friends and see if I can get the real recipe, and I'll post it here.

Awesome! The recipe is good. Very good! It’s been awhile since I’ve been to an Outback, but it’s damn close. I’d definitely be interested in trying the real recipe as well.

I also make wings similar to their Kookaburra wings. The recipe is really good, but I’d love to know how far off it is. Please and thank you :)

https://www.geniuskitchen.com/recipe/tsr-version-of-outback-kookaburra-wings-by-todd-wilbur-292483

Sorry for the long delay.

The ranch recipe is as follows:

2 gal mayo

1 gal buttermilk

3 T salt

2 T + 3/4 t pepper

2 T + 3/4 t onion powder

2 T + 3/4 t garlic powder

1 1/2 T cayenne

Obviously this makes 3 gallons of ranch, so when making standard human amounts, it's important to remember the 2 to 1 ratio of mayo to buttermilk, and probably season to taste. You can always adjust the recipe and use paprika for less kick, or substitute some sour cream for some of the mayo if you want a little sour bite.

The wings were a bit out of my wheelhouse (I was more interested in the sauce recipes when I worked there) but the one thing i do remember was that the sauce to coat the wings was made with butter. They would pull the wings out of the fryer and put them in a small circular lidded cambro (storage container) along with a scoop of the sauce mixture (which was hot sauce mixed with butter in a ratio that allowed the cconsistency to be similar to whipped butter) and swirl the wings with sauce to coat them.

Edit: butter makes everything better and spelling

If you go back to the recipe link you’ll see 1 cup mayo and 0.5 cup of buttermilk. 2:1 just like yours. What I’m interested in now is converting the dry ingredients to see how those ratios compare. Thanks!

It’s the milk to mayo ratio. Some people prefer it more watery, and some prefer it thicker. I prefer it watery personally.

Because they typically make it themselves. I worked at a restaurant where it was a literal craze in the area. You could literally drink this shit straight. The trick is to put in the buttermilk, ranch seasoning packet, and not too much mayo to the point where it's thick. it's much better/tastier runny. The ranch from markets is loaded with mayo. When I have the time to make it at my house i'll NEVER go back to normal ranch again. It's the same brand too, hidden valley. go figure

Does this make it tangier too? Because I notice the thicker ranch is usually sweeter and the thin ranch is much tangier.

it can yeah, since the seasoning is more pronounced with less mayo involved.

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Just saw that video actually.

If you’re not going to make it yourself (as many suggested) you can buy good quality ranch in your grocery store. Look in the produce department in the refrigerated section.

Taste and texture is nothing like the shelf stable crap. “Marie’s” is a popular brand here, but it only lasts a few weeks at best.

I buy the Marie's blue cheese dressing. It's definitely much better than the shelf stable stuff.

A restaurant I worked at years ago made their ranch with horseradish and mayonnaise and a little bit of Worcestershire sauce. It was really good

I feel the same way but with Blue cheese. It's always way better at restaurants. Closest I've come to it is Marie's.

blue cheese dressing at wing joints:

2.5 lbs of crumbles

2 gal of mayo

2 gal buttermilk

mix and put in those 2oz cups.

So convert that down from a 4gal batch to whatever you can eat in 2-3 days. :)

While everyone is saying its because restaurants make their own, theres another thing at play. Your perception of food quality is skewed at a restaurant. There's a few studies you can watch on YouTube.

They take regular fast food and tell participants that its 5 star food. Each time the participants say it's the best burger/taco/pasta they have ever had or that its much better than fast food.

LPT: the reason most foods in a restaurant tastes so much better than when you make it home; its been marinating for at least a day. Meal planning is how you step up your home chef game.

I call it the mom factor.

I could make literally the exact same sandwich as her but hers will always taste better.

I think I read somewhere that food always tastes better if someone else makes it compared to yourself (assuming it’s the exact same recipe).

Yeah. After watching so many cooking shows and contests- I've come to the conclusion that a LOT of people are shittier at cooking at home than they think.

LPT: the reason most foods in a restaurant tastes so much better than when you make it home; its been marinating for at least a day. Meal planning is how you step up your home chef game.

I suck at cooking because i do it all in a rush? The only thing i marinate are ... well marinated meats.

You suck at cooking because you haven't learned enough about it yet?

This has been answered but the amount of mayo that goes into making ranch is... profound. You're basically eating ranch flavored mayo.

I'm ok with that.

Bolthouse Farms makes ranch with yogurt instead of mayo and it tastes super close to what they serve in restaurants. I've always assumed that was why.

Oh my god ive wanted someone to ask me this for years...

YOU CAN BUY THE GOOD TASTING RANCH AT THE STORE! ITS JUST IN A DIFFERENT SECTION!

There are two main styles of ranch, dressing and dipping. I assume when you are talking about tasty ranch you mean that silky, white, beautiful pile of sauce that you sink endless fries, mozzarella sticks, and even your finger into.

That is dipping ranch my friend. Its slightly saltier, honestly intended for carrots and celery and shit, but oh god fuck me please its so good on everything.

The shit you think doesnt taste as good, thats the hidden valley shit. Thats the shit that you just kinda dribble on your pathetic little fuck salad and go on with your mediocre day. Most people search for ranch in the dressing section, when in reality you want to go to the baby carrot section, by the little finger vegetables.

My personal favorites are Maries and Lighthouse (non sponsored content but please god id love some free ranch)

Because it does not last nearly as long. The ranch you buy at the store lasts a long time because it has preservatives in it to, well, preserve it. Restaurants don't need their ranch to last a long time because they go through it so quickly.

This is often also true with things like salsa. restaurant salsa tastes way better than salsa in a jar from the store for the same reason.

Pretty sure I mostly enjoy it better cause I don't have to make it or do the dishes lol

but yeah, it def tastes better fresh than two years down the road out in the open (either way)...

I don't think preservatives taste bad tho. I think they just make it taste ok, longer. or well...

I mean, pickles are delicious and that's just a preservation thing.... Maybe we'll figure out a way to aged-steak or aged-cheese a slasa (errr ranch) that'll make it amazing. you know, like parmesan..

I'm sidetracked... taking away from all things currently to make tasty ranch you should use a packet of season and fresh ingredients.

Which def wouldn't taste good (at all) after a bit.

But not because there were preservatives... that'll make it taste good longer (sometimes better)

;)

Indeed. There is a lot more to this question than "OMG preservatives, durr!"

Good MF question! I had ranch dressing at home and it never tasted as good at the restaurants so I haven’t used it. Husband and I finally found this good ranch caesar and blue cheese dressing that has to be refrigerated and it came extremely close to what you’d get in the restaurants.

Do you not refrigerate all of your salad dressings???

Well I do after we open it, but I mean to say we used to buy salad dressings that would just be in the non refrigerated grocery aisle, like where the pasta and stuff is.

Now we buy the dressing that has to be in refrigerated aisle, even when unopened because it has more natural ingredients that could spoil, tastes way better too!

Like all the other comments have said, it's mostly because it's freshly made.

That said: restaurants put VERY rich, but very simple ingredients into their foods to make the taste amazing. Lots of salt, butters, cream, etc. The house dressing my restaurant makes is LOADED with fats and spices and cheese. It's comical how rich restaurant food is. If restaurants cooked like most people did, there'd be no reason to eat out.

Source: line and prep cook at a major chain restaurant.

I learned this when I started seeing calorie counts on menus. Similar meals that were 500-600 calories when I would make them at home ended up as 1,000-1,200 calories at restaurants. Fat is just so good.

A single piece of most of our deserts is around 1050 calories. It's not even that big. It's crazy.

Why does the shredded cheese in lunchables taste way better than the shredded cheese you buy at the store?

This is the real question we need answers to

..and i have tried every shredded cheese ive found at the store and STILL

Does anyone know what brand of ranch does Domino’s use?

Asking the important questions!

Buy the Uncle Dan’s powder mix at the store and you’ll never be disappointed again. Uncle Dan’s for LIFE.

My good friend owns a burger joint and makes his own ranch for the restaurant. Screw store bought junk.

Los Angeles. It's not nice diners it's more like greasy spoons where you pick up your own food and they serve a mix of standard American food and Mexican food. I lived in two different areas and it was the same thing. If you ask for extra ranch when you order they never give it to you and when you ask for more later they seem reluctant. There's specifically one place that's super strict on it. The lady seems mad when you ask for ranch and says with attitude "you KNOW that's and extra 30 cents right?"

Sheesh, just hand over the ranch, lady.

Chef here: I always use a mix of sour cream and mayo with butter milk. THEN I use a dash of soy sauce or Worcestershire sauce for some extra umami

Or you can just add straight msg, which isn't bad either

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Literally anything savory to make it more delicious and creamy. For me it’s come to the point that I cannot enjoy pizza, french fries, or chicken wings without having ranch to dip.

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Definitely has an Umamu factor from the MSG. It’s very flavorful. Some may even find it too strong.

Pizza, spicy foods, salads, French fries, the list goes on and on

Former restaurant worker here. Its the MSG but they don't want to tell you that. btw its hidden valley ranch

Toppers pizza place of Ventura county, CA makes fresh ranch for pizza and they say they make enough to fill n Olympic sized swimming pool every year.

Toppers!!! Love Toppers. Love the salad bar and the pizza and the ranch. Wish they would come down to Orange County.

Arguably the best salad bar in the country.

I have yet to find one better. Anywhere.

They opened a new one in the Channel Islands harbor that’s really nice.

The ranch you buy in a store is usually loaded with corn syrup giving it that gross sweetness that does not belong there. It's disgusting to me how nearly every bottled salad dressing is full of that unnecessary crap.

You may be thinking of something else. Not even the grossest Kraft dressings use corn syrup. You can find ingredient labels on Google images.

My mistake. They use actual sugar. SUGAR DOES NOT BELONG IN RANCH OR BLUE CHEESE DRESSING NO MATTER WHAT!!! Sorry, the chef in me is coming out.

Buy the ranch dressing in the refrigerated section. The shelf-stable stuff often contains a lot of soybean oil.

Just to clarify.. There is a difference between mayo and mayonnaise. Real talk my southern folks know that Dukes mayonnaise is sacred hillbilly nectar. Adding that to your homemade ranch will take it to the next level! Also, you must use full fat Buttermilk, not any of that reduced fat poser. I come from a long line of lunch ladies who have perfected the homemade ranch recipe. Once you start making it at home, you can't never be satisfied with bottled imposters!

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I miss the old kraft mayo receipe.

How about “Just Mayo”

there is no difference between mayo and mayonnaise - the first one is just the second word shortened. perhaps you mean miracle whip? that shit ain't mayo

I never knew full fat buttermilk existed until I visited West Virginia. Somehow the next time I was down there I couldn't find it again. At least I could go down to the Piggly Wigglys and get me a can of Mr Pig.

Blue Ribbon > Hellmans > Dukes

I’ve never seen full fat buttermilk at any store that I can remember. Maybe I’ll make some myself.

Also, you must use full fat Buttermilk, not any of that reduced fat poser.

Real buttermilk (ie the liquid leftover after making butter) is virtually fat free. You’re confused. The full fat stuff with added cultures is the poser here. Use sour cream + milk. It’s even better.

Whole fat, full fat... Whatever suits your fancy.. leave it to Reddit for all the ranch critics to come out. I'm just trying to pass on the secret to a good quality dressing. There is a difference, and yes its out there. If your mayonnaise says mayo on the jar and not Real Mayonnaise you may want to reevaluate your life choices... and don't get me started on miracle whip! 😂

The real reason is the first ingredient on the packets they use in restaurants is MSG which tastes amazing

Surprised not to see this closer to the top. I worked front of house at a restaurant, and our customers would always rave about the dressings, especially the ranch. I asked the chef one day how he made the dressings and turned out the secret is MSG. Not sure if we used the packets or he just added it

All hail MSG!

I had ceasar dressing on a salad in a restaurant, it ended up burning inside my mouth, the skin was peeling but the wife her mouth was fine.

You may have been allergic to something in it, or someone added some cleaning chemicals to your salad.

This is probably due to the vinegar. Ifnyou have miniscule cuts in your mouth (this can happen when you're run down), then acidic things like lemon or vinegar hurt a surprising amount!

The key is using Xtra Heavy Duty Mayonnaise. It has the consistency of spackling paste. Blend it with some buttermilk and spices and you got the best ranch ever that will be good for about a week if refrigerated.

Xtreme Xtra Heavy Duty Industrial Strength 100% Pure Grade A Triple THICC Quadruple Layer No Filler Freedom Loving Justice Fighting American Mayonnaise

It is the buttermilk. The ranch in a bottle has a vinegar milk base, because that's the cheap way to make "buttermilk" tasting milk. And preservatives taste like shit!

Am I the only one that thinks the opposite?

Some restaurants also sell bottles of their amazing Ranch. Ask and ye shall be surprised. Heck, Jet's will even deliver the ranch to you

In addition to the common answer of "less preservatives," some restaurants also just make their own. It's easier than it sounds, and it produces a much higher quality of product that doesn't have that "fake" taste. Look up a scratch recipe online and you can even try it yourself; the ingredients are pretty cheap!

Edit: punctuation.

I 100% agree... And I've tried to make it at home. But I resorted to just buy it from the restaurant. It's usually cheaper and much more quantity.

Can someone explain to me what diner bbq sauce they use or make?!

I can never buy it in stores but it’s amazing, more tangy then Smokey

Mayo, sour cream, half and half cream, garlic and onion powder and dill. Way better than store bought

If I can add on to this question, what are the dressings used at teriyaki joints? I've never come across any of them in the store. (Obviously the dressings vary, but still)

Depends on the ranch you buy at the store. If you buy the pricier stuff, you'll get better flavor. Same with all the sauces

This is my chance... okay so I’ve been wondering this forever and it seems like everyone here knows their ranch pretty well. When I was a kid, Mimi’s Cafe used to have this ranch that was really thin and SUPER tangy. I’ve had this kind of ranch at a lot of other places since then but it’s very hit and miss. Most places have a much sweeter and thicker ranch and the ranch you buy at the store is always thick, never thin. I always thought this meant Mimi’s was passing off some kind of cheap ranch but I really love that kind of ranch and would love to recreate that at home. Who makes that kind of ranch and why is it like that and how can I make my own?!

I’m probably going to copy and paste this as a reply to people if I can’t get a response, this has been bugging me for years! I don’t know how to find a recipe for this online!

Oh man, haven’t been to Mimi’s in AGES but reading this reminded me how much I loved their ranch too! It was the main reason I always ordered their fries zucchini sticks.

I’m having a more recent love affair with Cheesecake Factory’s ranch which is what I’m scouring the comments for lol

Mimi’s has changed so much now! From what I remember it used to be kind of kitschy with novelty decor around (the one we always went to in Phoenix used to have this fake parrot I would stare at while I ate my dirt and worms dessert) but now they’re very French chic and seem to specialize in brunch with mimosas.

I’ve only been to Cheesecake Factory like twice so I’m not familiar with their ranch but I’ll have to go now and try it!

Might be in house sauce?

Any one on here from Phx, AZ and/or familiar with Barro's Pizza...I'm pretty sure they put CRACK in their ranch...it is better than home/restarant made HVR.

I keep asking them if they'll sell it in 8 - 16 oz containers...they keep telling me "no".

Once, the girl went back & actually got the brand name off the container & told me. Stoopid me didn't write it down or make a mental note of it...probably couldn't get it anyways, unless I buy/open a restaurant.

Dill pickle juice. Taste it next time - it’s there and the secret restaurant ingredient. Now I make it at home this way all the time!

Very true. Wingstop to me has the best ranch to me, I could literally sit there and drink it if I had the tenacity. But the ranch I buy at the store is gross. It’s wingstop that I prefer, hooters and Buffalo Wild Wings have funny tasting ranch too.

Bww uses that Heinz crap and it's nasty!

Every restaurant I’ve worked at had its own ranch recipe. 100% scratch. If you have the ingredients it’s not much more than using the packet and so much better. Buttermilk, mayo, sour cream, garlic, onion, salt, pepper, parsley. dill. You can use various other things to tweak the taste, such as Worcestershire sauce, mustard powder, chives, maybe a ground red pepper. You do need a processor if you wanna use fresh ingredients otherwise dried will work too.

I've been a cook for a long time and I'll tell you the sad truth...leave it out at a "chill" temperature for at least a day and do all your food prep over it so that random particulate matter falls in it. Mmmmmm! Sort of a joke, sort of not.

Because it's either house made using one of a trillion recipes online or it's a different brand besides Hidden Valley.

Which tastes like shit.

Homemade ranch is the best. Makes all other ranch seem pointless. Super cheap and easy to make.

Made it in the restaurant I worked at and didn’t use the packets:

1 to 1 sour cream an mayo

A little more onion powder then garlic powder.

Salt and fresh pepper

Buttermilk - until you get the consistency you want

Refrigerate

If you’re using a cup of mayo then I would use about a fourth cup of onion powder. We did it by eye but it’s hard to mess up.

It's also salted and peppered to taste during the mixing of ingredients listed in the top comment. Restaurant = more salt.

1 package of ranch mix (1 oz)

20 ounces of mayo

20 ounces of buttermilk

Make the night before and refrigerate

Use within date of the buttermilk and keep refrigerated

I work at a wingstop and we make a fresh batch of ranch everyday by hand. That’s also why it cost extra for more ranch. Ppl need to stop whining about it being extra

Ex-chef here. Ingredients, mostly. My psych professor is screaming, "expectations" from a couple decades ago: you expect it to taste better, therefore it does. Plus no preservatives. Real sugar, if your place uses sugar.

Tldr: real ingredients with few or no preservatives, which also means our supply lasts days, not the months and years your store-bought crap lasts.

They make it in house. No weird preservatives at a restaurant. Also, bottled dressings add sugar. Hit the store, buy a ranch packet and make you own. It takes 30 seconds.

Cuz we make shit from scratch. We try to be original. If we buy it and serve it’s not real cooking. A little more Effort makes a huge difference.

Seeing alot of comments here from other chefs, seems like alot of you use premade packets of some sort? Is that the norm? We make our own ranch from scratch and I think it's delicious and it's not that hard. Genuinely concerned and curious

also Kens brand dressings. thought the big tubs they sell in restaurant stores taste better.

Chef here, it is a blend of ranch seasoning, and buttermilk. I would highly suggest experimenting at home.

I might be a snob, but most ranch dressing at restaurants - and other grocery store ranch brands for that matter - just can't measure up to Hidden Valley. You can get a giant FLAGON of the stuff at Walmart for like $6, so it's not like you need to really buy anything else.

Never had ranch dressing, how does it taste?

side note... chicken fat... Applebees makes a great oriental chicken salad, but it will never be vegetarian, even if you leave off the chicken, because that's what's in the dressing... it wasn't easy to get that info either.

Someone must surely know WHY?

Most of the responses so far are recipes rather than explanations of why there would be a difference in flavour.

Oooohhh someone tell me how to make restaraunt cesar dressing cause the store bought shit just doesnt compare

You basically make a paste from the anchovie salt and garlic. Then add the yolks. Whisk in the oil until you make an emulsion. Boom, you got caesar dressing.

For bonus points make your own croutons from stale bread (french) and a fine mince of chili peppers, garlic, anchovy, and shallots fried in oil.

I.....i think im good. Anchovies are a no for me. Thanks anyway!

Why is fresh caesar better?

also you: 'nevermind'

look up umami

look up garum

look up fish sauce

Dressing of any kind almost always tastes better fresh made than packaged. It really it better to have the competing flavors and acids rather than a dressing that has reached equilibrium, been made in a giant batch, and put into packages that sit around for quite some time. The best recipe for ranch that I have had is the one in "Joy of Cooking" that you mortar the salt and garlic and has buttermilk and cilantro. Sorry I can't find the recipe but it is so good! Probably runny for some, but the flavor!

I’d assume they add more to it at restaurants (people claiming to be chefs already said as much) so they’re bound to spice, season, sweeten, or what have you and serve it out.

Because the garbage on the shelf is made with soybean oil instead of milk and mayo. Convenience ain't worth it, make your own.

1 packet of ranch powder + 1 cup of milk/buttermilk + 1 cup of mayo. Wisk it and let it set in the fridge until it thickens up.

Brain dead easy. It was the first thing we taught our kids to cook.

Not always, IMO. Another chef, here. Not all ranch is created equal. There's the recipe the other chef shared, a very old fashioned Hidden Valley-packet based ranch. Standard in most high volume restaurants that don't really give a crap about their ranch. If they give a crap, they make it from scratch without the mix.

That's *ranch*. I've worked a few places that make the good and it's usually some buttermilk, lemon juice, fresh fucking herbs and everything else that's good in the world. I can't even share any of the recipes because I signed NDAs at all the restaurants that made their own ranch recipes. I can always tell if a restaurant makes it themselves or uses hidden valley packets mixed with mayo and I can even tell if they went heavier or lighter on the sour cream.

I noticed no one mentioned heavy duty mayonnaise. That was the only difference when I made it at home and the restaurant. HD mayo makes best foods taste like miracle whip.

You can buy a big container of ranch powder at Costco. It is really good and has many uses besides dressing. I sometimes make butter & ranch croutons with my old bread. Also good mixed with bread crumbs and used as a chicken coating.

Butter or similar. Restaurants fill up everything with butter so it tastes better. Don't ask them about the calories though

Me and my brother know which restaurants have the best ranch and we both always ask when going to new restaurants if they have “The Ranch” as we call it. We eat that shit up

One thing I've wondered (and occasionally googled to find other people wondering the same thing, but not the actual answer) is why the stupid little tubs of Jack in the Box ranch also taste better than bottled ranch. I still don't know who makes theirs.

Another chef ringing in. I find that the biggest key to restuarant ranch beyond the HV packet and buttermilk is "heavy duty mayo." Heavy duty mayo just tastes different than store bought mayo. You can pick up heavy duty mayo at a Gordon Food Service if your city has one.

It's mostly better at restaurants than at the grocery store because that crap you buy in the warm grocery aisle is made with soy oil, eww...

We make it at my restaurant (manager here, not chef) from scratch. As in, we don’t even use packets. Just herbs, seasonings, mayo, and heavy cream. It is prepped in a 15-ish gallon container. It’s a pretty disgusting sight to watch it prepped, and even more disgusting to watch people turn their salads into ranch-lettuce soup. Yes, I’m judging you 😉

Restaurant grade mayonnaise makes a huge difference. I work at a pizza shop and we use about 20 percent whole milk and 80 percent mayonnaise and 2 of the hidden valley ranch packets, people literally drink our ranch they like it so much.

ELI5: Why does pizza made fresh in a pizzeria oven taste better than boxed frozen pizza you microwave from the grocery store?

Why does a local ice cream shop that mixes their own flavors taste better than Breyer’s?

Why does a hamburger made from fresh ground beef taste better than costco frozen patties?

JFC the question answers itself. Combining ingredients freshly in small batches vs mass produced vats being mixed for national shelf-stable distribution create vastly different results. I’m trying to go to bed but am kept awake at the thought of how someone who’s not actually 5 would need an explanation for this.

True but the fact is there is no such thing as good ranch dressing from the bottle and people want to talk about it.

Litehouse and Marie’s are both good options since they require refrigeration, and better than a lot of restaurant ranch. There’s just no such thing as good shelf-stable dairy.

I make a healthier version that's AMAZING! And I don't feel guilty about scooping everything in it.

1 pack hidden valley ranch 1/2 cup 2% Greek yogurt 1/4 cup low fat sour cream 1/4 cup full fat sour cream Two tablespoons of brewers yeast (for vitamins and extra tart kick)

Oops, on mobile and it looks weird. Sorry!

If you want real Ranch Dressing, Look up "Chef John's" recipe. I've had it and was blown away. Everything is from scratch.

The secret is Parsley and Celery Salt. Why use powdered mixes from the same brand that makes the bottled Ranch?

Here's my old recipe from my restaurant days.

Uses fresh ingredients.

Makes a gallon, so... really love ranch. (I quarter scaled it down from the original 4gal recipe.)

Blend in a blender, or use a stick emulsifier:

1/2 of a Yellow Onion

1/4 Cup Garlic Cloves, fresh, peeled

1/4 Cup Celery Salt

1/8 Cup Parsley, de-stemmed

1 Teaspoon Black Pepper

4 Cups Buttermilk (1 Quart)

12 Cups of Mayo (3 Quarts) - Real Mayo, or make your own, but Not miracle whip.

Shelf stable for up to whenever your buttermilk was said to expire.

As someone who's not in USA, what is dressing?

In this instance, what you put onto a lettuce salad. Also used as a dip for vegetables (crudites), chicken wings, etc.

I'm guessing it's the same reason why my grandmas sandwiches taste better than any other. I could use the same exact ingredients and it wouldn't be the same.

Some things in restaurants taste better because they are all the same temperature. Butter, dressings, etc. Things that are cold lose their taste. For me, it's why toast tastes so much better at restaurants :P

Cause it's from Sysco and has been sitting in an opened 5 gallon plastic tub on the bottom left shelf of the walkin for 6 months buried behind a 50lb box of chicken hearts that were supposed to get used as a special.

I work at Longhorn Steakhouse. They make their own ranch, usually with a lot of mayo and also their prairie dust seasoning. It also expires a lot faster, so it's probably not loaded with long shelf life type shit that store brand ranch typically has in it.

Ranch at restaurants is freshly made. Less preservatives than buying from a store because it made with buttermilk and mayonnaise. They also have preservatives but by mixing 1 cup ranch mix to 1 gallon of buttermilk to 1 gallon of mayonnaise your tasting fresh as compared to something off of a shelf.

I feel like no one has answered the question from a brief skim of the top comments. The reason is because they have to add vinegar and other shelf stabilizers to bottled ranch so it can be sold in bottles.

Many here have already told you how to make restaurant quality ranch at home from store bought items. It's good shit.

I work at a pizza place, and we use straight up store bought ranch dressing, and people always tell me how much better our ranch is. The power if persuasion is amazing. Lol

Look at all the chef's here misleading everyone into thinking every restaurant makes their own ranch. The vast majority of restaurants are using the big jugs from a national food distributor.

Worked in the industry for years.

I can taste the difference! I hate restaurants that use crap ranch.

What about Chilis ranch? It’s the best I’ve ever had

Often times your memory of taste gets mixed with memories of the place where you tasted it. Like wine you bring home never tastes like it did at the wine tasting.

We stopped using Hidden valley packets and make our own now, it's basically equal parts Sour Cream, Mayo, and Buttermilk, and then a bunch of parsley, dill, garlic salt and onion powder. Customers dump it on everything.

The reason is because the ingredients on good restaurants are always fresh, the the dressing was made not so long ago if not made specially for you when your ordered.

Anything you buy on a store is actually old, made some time ago with chemicals mixed to increase durability.

Cause the giant 50L bucket that's now half been used and is 3 days since opening gives you that extra flavor.

Another chef here, and former culinary instructor.

Just wanted to say, technically, ranch dressing is not it's own entity.

The dressing that has become known as "Ranch" is actually a "Buttermilk dressing".

The reason we call it "ranch" is because the dressing was created by a man who ran a dude ranch in Santa Barbara CA. Back in the 50's. This was thier own "house dressing" The dressing became so popular, that they decided to sell it locally, as a dry mix you added to buttermilk. "Hidden Valley Ranch, buttermilk dressing". The Clorox company purchased the ranch and the dressing mix, and created the first shelf-stable version to be bottled and sold in stores. Again, packaged as HVR buttermilk dressing. Eventually, clorox embraced the colloquial recognition, and changed thier entire brand to just "Hidden Valley" and re-named the actual dressing "Ranch" so they can get the rights to it. That's why most fast food joints don't have "ranch", they have "house" or "buttermilk" sauce.

Now you know.

Same reason Alfredo and other sauces, veggies, and meats usually taste better at restaurants is because they pour on the butter and other fatty things like buttermilk, cream, cream cheese, etc. Fat tastes good. At home or when you go to the store the lower fat items stand out and you buy them conscientiously because, who would buy stuff that has gazillions of calories like they use in restaurants? Also, for the low-sodium crowd, restaurants use pounds of salt.

If there were two restaurants, side by side, exactly the same except one of them used low fat and low sodium in their recipes, people would eat at the healthy one only once, and would return multiple times to the other one because it just taste better.

Store bought probably contains vinegar. I discovered this about bleu cheese dressing when I had a similar question to the OP.

Because if you could see the sat fat and calories you’d never buy restaurant ranch in the store

You just have to make it yourself. Stop buying bottled ranch. It really is awful. They put vinegar or something in it. Blech! Even the Hidden Valley Ranch bottle tastes awful. Don't do it.

Do this:

  1. Buy a packet of Hidden Valley Ranch.
  2. Follow the directions on the packet.

That's it.

(The directions are for a cup of mayo and a cup of milk along with the package of ranch mix. Combine and stir it up. Your tiny whisk is great for this.

Then you can just pour it into an old dressing bottle... Or if you're like me and have part of the mayo container only a little full, just make a dressing in there and shake it all up and store the dressing in the mayo container.

FYI - make sure you buy the Hidden Valley Ranch DRESSING mix and NOT the dip mix. They sell a box that looks nearly identical, for some reason, and although it tastes similar it will not thicken up the same way.

Restaurant dressing is manufactured differently than store bought. Mostly preservatives. It tastes different because it is different.

Source: I recently asked a friend who works at a dressing manufacturing plant.

Phew, as someone with a dietetics degree, there’s a shitload of cringeworthy “facts” being thrown around about nutrition in the comments here.

What is ranch dressing I’ve always wondered ? What’s in it ? We don’t have it in the UK

If you are in r/texas, get some Hill Country Fare Ranch from HEB and you can forget bothering to make your own.

Mayo and Heinz chili sauce. Little bit of horseradish and Worcestershire , onion and garlic powder. Salt and pepper to tasteS, if to spicy substitut some ketchup for chili sauce. If you want it sweeter add some honey or agave syrup.

We can’t let the all mighty secret of spicy ranch outta the, it’ll blow minds.

Hint: it’s just hot sauce or red pepper. Sriracha also acceptable.

Leave out the ranch pack. Add crumbled blue cheese. A onion and garlic powder and pepper. Easy on the salt because of the cheese but use it to taste. I like fresh dill in mine as well.

Yup, basically restaurants are typically good because of either salt, fat, or acid. All three being the best haha.

How did you guys do it? This way seems to hold best on a buffet for me and stands up as a dressing or dip.

I'm not sure what restaurants yall are eating ranch at, but here it's the opposite. Every place I go Waters down their ranch to make it go further and the ranch I make at home is ten times better. Except for the higher end steak houses etc

It doesn't. Ranch tastes terrible in all forms.

Now for a serous answer, it could be that the restaurant makes it from scratch. I can't speak for all restaurants, but the one I worked at did. Try making it yourself at home, you might end up with something you'll love, plus you can play around with the ingredients.

Duke’s Mayonnaise is what I’ve found to be the secret. Buttermilk, ranch powder and mayo...but the mayo is so important to getting just the right taste.

I love dukes, the only brand of food that I have 100% loyalty!

If you’re looking to make the BEST RANCH EVER you should use Bulgarian buttermilk. It has a higher fat content percentage and once you use it you’re going to be upset that you’ve been missing out on it for all these years.

I swear these threads asking the same question pop up very regularly and it's always "add salt" or "add sugar" or "add [insert unhealthy ingredient]"

What I REALLY want to know is why a pint pulled from a tap at the pub tastes better than a can of the same beer.

Probably the same reason McDonald’s Coke tastes best. The freshness of the drink in the canister etc.

The reason most every restaurants food tastes better than home cooking or store bought, is because of two things: fat and salt. There is a lot of both in restaurants.

That's not true in this case. It's a matter of freshly made ranch dressing vs shelf stable ranch you get in a bottle.

No it's because they don't have nearly as much perservatives. There's probably more sodium in store bought ranch.

Don't forget sugar - in the UK a lot of pre-made sauces you buy in the jar (pasta sauce, curry etc) have reduced sugar so they look like healthy options, but the sweetness is a key component of the proper taste and is the reason why restaurant/properly home-cooked sauces can seem so "succulent" compared to the flat flavour from jars.

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Celery salt is key. Almost every scratch made restaurant ranch has celery salt in it. It gives it a unique flavor that I’ve never found in any store bought ranch.

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Lots of loathing for those who drown food you’ve created in the devils jizz. You don’t want want the food, you want ranch.

Word. Str8 up, fuck ranch.

A bunch of gross shit like French fries and sanitizer solution finds it’s way into the expo line and into our tub of ranch. Glad you enjoy it!

Great ranch (IMHO) is made with copious amounts of buttermilk and light ranch seasoning. The stuff at grocery stores is super thick and I think we’re all joking ourselves by saying it’s ok. As cousin Eddy used to say “The bread pudding is extra runny tonight”

Not an answer to the original question, and may have already been asked/answered - any lactose free ranch recipes?

My favorite ranch, restaurant ones included, is great value classic ranch. I actually usually hate restaurant ranches and hidden valley and other kinds of more popular brands. It's probably just because I grew up poor.

Anytime you wonder "Why doesn't my X taste like restaurants X" Its either because you are eating pre-prepared food that is prepared fresh at the restaurant, or you are eating fresh food that was pre prepared at the restaurant. One method will use long lasting ingredients, the other will use fresh stuff, in this case buttermilk, not worrying about it expiring soon

It doesn't. You just overpaid for it at a restaurant and you think it tastes better because of that. Or the ranch in your fridge is expired.