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r/fixedbytheduetu/qasqaldag (17438)

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She's the one who writes "I apologize for bad grammar. English is not my first language." Then proceeds to write in Nobel Prize's worth English.

"My sincerest apologies for any grammatical errors or limited vocabulary my message may contain, English is not my mother tongue and I am still in the process of learning the nuances of this language"

(I swear most ESL speakers know better English than EFL)

Applies to my partner. When we met, he told me that he disliked people who were sticklers for grammar & spelling, as he didn't learn English until he was in high school. He's better than most at both.

If you do something every day you'll do t get better at it, you get more efficient with it, and efficiency and laziness often look the same. And with speech that results in "y'ain't n'er 'een"

He sounds stuck up tbh

definitely not me tho 💪💪💪💪😎😎😎😎

We both highly regarded

You don't have to end every sentence with tho, tho.

ion give a swag tho

It's usually because we learn English from books, so we are actually less familiar with the slang or shortened words. Therefore our sentences seem more formal

That is the case, yes

Nah, the outliers just get more attention.

they are saying like “I’m very sorry for my limited knowledge of English, that is because I didn’t knew it firstly when I was born. This is my sincere apology sir, my apology was not a humorous thing.”

also if there is any grammatical error in the sentence I just said I’m very sorry for that because my first language is not English too lol

When I was getting my GED my classmates were people who had immigrated to the u.s and we're getting their GED so they could work. One thing I noticed is English and math were the main classes being taught by their respective teachers with the others being taught by the same teachers.

So english and math were more heavily focused on which may be a reason for this.

English isn't my first language.

Before I begin my actual comment, I would like to apologize in advance for my inadequate level of English proficiency. I am not a native speaker of the world's current lingua franca which unfortunately leads to me making numerous embarrassing mistakes being made whenever I attempt to communicate using this language. Whenever I am reminded of how I lack the ability to convey my thoughts in an eloquent manner, I feel as though I have committed a cardinal sin, as though every English teacher in the world is simultaneously shaking their head and sighing due to how utterly disappointed they are at me.

Although I know that saying sorry to those of you who are reading my comment will not change the fact that I fail miserably to write and speak perfect English, I am writing this as a way to deter a certain type of people who cannot stand poor English (Also known informally as Grammar Nazis) from mocking me by posting unwanted and unnecessary comments detailing my every blunder. In my humble opinion, making grammatical errors should be perfectly acceptable as native speakers should not expect non-native speakers to be able to communicate in their second or third languages eloquently. If you are able to completely understand what the other person wrote, is there really a problem with what they've written? No, because the entire concept of communication is the exchange of information between other intelligent beings, which means that no matter how the exchange of information is made, as long as the information is accurately shared there is not a fundamental issue with their ability to communicate. To see it in another way, remember that someone who isn't fluent in English is fluent in another language. When you think about it this way, isn't it impressive for someone to speak a second language in any capacity? Having empathy and respect are qualities that are sorely missing for far too many people these days, especially on the internet.

That being said, I am aware that not all netizens who correct others are doing it to ridicule and shame. There are some who do so with the intent to help others improve and grow. However, displaying the failures of other people publicly will cause the person who is criticized to feel negative emotions such as shame and sadness due to the fact that their mistake has been made obvious which severely undermines the point they were trying to make in spite of their unfamiliarity with the English language. In most circumstances people are not looking for language help when they post anything online. Most people just want to enjoy themselves and have a good time on the internet which is why I would not encourage correcting other people regardless of your intentions. If you really do want to help others with their spelling or grammar, I would highly recommend you to help via messaging privately because not only will you not embarrass anyone, you can also go more in-depth with your explanation which I'm sure the other person will greatly appreciate if they want help, but I digress. I know that I've written a bit of an essay, but I hope I've made my points clear.

Anyways, here is the comment I wanted to make:

Cock.

both of those seem vulgar

Just because we have freedom of speech here doesn't mean anyone gives a fuck about listening to you.

Bro who pissed in ur cereal this morning?

This remembered me the guy who sold his wife for better internet connection

"I humbly beg your forgiveness for any transgressions in my grammatical expression. English, alas, is not my native tongue."

"Oh"

Disappointingly recalled.

I didn’t know that pinion could mean feather. Cool.

Pin feathers yes but pinion is the end part the birds wing if we want to be more specific. Flight feather would be another word for pinion. Down feather is something different. Anyway, English is my second language lol.

so whether a bird can fly or not is a matter of a pinion?

This might be the best joke I’ve ever read.

God.

Fucking.

Dammit.

Take your upvote and choke on it.

Everyone go home, puns are done, we've reached the apex pun.

a few pinions at least

r/angryupvote

No many flightless birds have pinion feathers

To r/jokes you go to get recycled and die !

That one tickled

God damn you that was good

You won the internet

Please let me bow at you feet

This was a terrible pun, but it made me chuckle.

Oh! you coulda fooled me!

That's just like your a pinion man.

a jackdaw or a crow?

Elaborate monsieur

They both seem sturnus vulgaris

I think I learned that from runescape lol

Gotta play some elden ring bro

Keep your pinions to yourself, buddy!

I learned that from video games

well, no one asked for your a pinion

Left: FFXIV localization team

Right: Me, tired of reading.

Clearly, thou must needs increase thy verbosity.

In English Urianger, please

Pray return to the waking sands

you cannot use thou and your to adress the same person in the same sentence.

thou must increase THY verbosity

Ah, woe is me. I've been exposed as the fraud I am.

Give him a few bells a day and he will get it. Try walking a malm in his shoes.

Verily, forsooth, perchance.

She sounds like Paige Sinclair from Bojack Horseman

that’s what i was thinking too! lol

Yep. Strong mid-atlantic accent vibes.

She's also from Fresno

What the English call a rooty tooty point-and-shooty the Americans call a pistol.

Nah, Americans call it a roooting tooting essential-school-supply

For a rootin' tootin' school shootin'

lol lmao rofl so hard at this totally original and definitely not over used shit joke 😂😂😂🤣🤣🤩

Tbf, it's also an overused shit tragedy

/r/OneJokeButEuropean

r/europeanjoke if you will

I bet that dude doesn’t see many titties.

Very correct. I saw exactly 0 in the past 30 years.

I understand your desire to see them then.

This girl is a 10/10 just by saying “helically arranged fastener”

A non helically arranged fastener 😌

Oh

Both of those seem vulgar

Hilarious 😐

Very humorous 😐😐😐😐

I'm busting a gut over here 😐😐😐😐😐

Ahh, yes. The Queen’s emoji!

^(oh)

^(I didn’t know u could do this)

How did u do it?

Caret then parentheses an asterisk then ur text, another asterisk and a closing parentheses. “^(text)

She purposefully said the wrong things in an exaggerated way, I can't stop laughing at each hilarious exaggeration, omg blood is coming out of my "food Deteriorator" I am feeling a stabbing pain in my "blood pumping device" hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahaha

Blood locomotor*

My knee is so bruised that even broke the skin from all the knee slapping hilarity 😐😐😐😐

Am I the only one that found her obnoxious

Woosh. The comment you’re replying to is obviously sarcastic

Yes dude obviously this gal's got the whole squad laughing rn 😐

r/technicallythetruth

So just an overly verbose dictionary but with an exaggerated posh accent

The kind Stephen Fry gently ribs on, yes.

Stephen Fry is such a treasure for the world I hate to think of the day he will no longer be with us.

Mate, David Attenborough is going to die soon and I don't think the nation is prepared. Just a thought.

Fuck off man, he's here for another 50 years. Don't say stuff like that.

In the video Fry is saying he likes wordplay and shows sadness that words are often not considered interesting and anytime someone plays with them others attack them of being elitist and boring.

What is grinding his gears is the use of crude language and people that think they own language "correctness" to the point of wanting to pedantically dictate what others should say.

Looking at the video I would say she belongs the the first paragraph someone that makes trivial jokes around wordplay. Which is something Stephen Fry is showing sadness that no one likes to anymore.

She’s clearly doing a bit, do you not realize this is a bit?

Wow you figured out the joke! Great job 😊😊😊

Honestly she doesn't even sound British, she sounds like she is using a Mid-Atlantic accent, which was created by Americans for movies in the 1930's or so.

Her accent is pleasant to listen to.

It's like a female stewie from family guy

Not bad for being fake.

Next time you could try "Not bad considering it's fake"

Her 'oh's are the best part 😄

Both of those seem vulgar..

Well okay, guess I’m in love with her now

I was looking for you! And yeah that was weirdly hot.

why were you looking for me

Nah, this is kinda brilliant. No shameful or weird overreactions, and some clever word-play in her part.

Looking at a lot of posts and most upvotes, people prefer the shameful or weird overreactions. I also liked this, it was clean wordplay humor.

[deleted]

Why don’t you let people enjoy things they find funny, the world doesn’t care that you don’t

Oh yes, humor, that objective scientific metric...

When you reach Level C3 in your English course

For those who are interested, her name is iamtherubric on Tiktok

Thanks

No problem. She's hilarious, all her content is gold.

Is this the real life Sadie Doyle?

Another drink, darling?

I couldn’t think of who that voice was reminding me of

I totally forgot about that show!!

🍸^clink

She's my favourite person in the world. I've just decided that.

That Ugh.. after the guy speaks is so good. So Subtle. Clever skit

That's exactly how everything is described in 40k's Imperium of Man...excessively Britishly.

Unless you’re an ork. Then you are Bri’ish innit

Pack it in everyone, u/samdog1246 already made the best joke. Move along.

That little ehg she says after his turn. So subtle. Love it

🤣 I love it so much!

This woman's voice will forever live in the back of my head.

First one I’d call a tart personally

But shes right on the first one, it is a peach pastry

That guy looks like Juuse Saros

I loved this one

"Both of those seem vulgar" I mean... she ain't wrong

“Oh”

Her voice is so soothing

It’s no a pie it’s a bloody tart ye bam

gif

She reminds me of Mortdecai…

Love the… oooh. It’s perfect.

He’s so aggressive

how many did you get right!

[deleted]

I wanna hear her reject my marriage proposal as we stand underneath the tree we use to play under as children.

The next day she would race to the train station as I prepare to return to the front, ready to die for king and country. Tearfully she would take back her rejection, and we would embrace as steam from the locomotive blew all around us.

Do we get married? Will I make it back from the front? Stay tuned for next weeks episode of things that didn’t actually happen.

bro what the fuck are you on about

snap out of it

Thank me for my imaginary service.

Maybe it's the time of night but I found her funny.

Who is that girl? She looks really familiar but I can't place it.

@iamtherubric on tiktok

Also on twitch apparently.

She's the one who writes "I apologize for bad grammar. English is not my first language." Then proceeds to write in Nobel Prize's worth English.

gif

Missed an opportunity to say bumbershoot!

Is she strangly cute to anyone else or is she supposed to be cringe? I never know on these "fixed by duet" posts

C2 language exam

Is it me or it has the same vibe as "it goes in the square hole"?

Love it

I’m in love

She sounds dumb

Goddamn this is fucking cringe

*Goddamn this is fucking awesome

There, I fixed it for you.

The lady is cringe not sure how she made this good...

Meh

She actually got them all correct. They are verbose descriptions but it gets the point across.

Yeah, that's the joke

Is she from r/StrangePlanet?

There are so many of these on Chinese tiktok

Eh

A non helical arranged fastener makes it vague. But I am nit-picking.

2 dimensional aid cant say wrong 😍 👍

Why does her voice sound like a British melody to my ears

Yeah x 14.

Buttery english are the best

where's the funny

Definitely not here.

All brits have a method to become just like this. We, however, tend not to do so, because we sound like pillocks.

Regardless, it is gratifying to see someone pull of the method most effectively. Well done my dear, well done.

Literally giving the definition not the actual word for it.

Average leftists' expectations after banning all offensive words

They don't have to once all dictionaries have been banned due to "pornographic content".

loved her words.
kinda reminds of me of the difference between saying
I need to get petrol
I need to buy petrol
one sounds like a terrorist

no one sounds Br*tish, the other sounds Irish Republican Army

That guy is fucking horrifying to look at.

British English vs. American English 😂

So, did you hear about that food critic down at the mirror? That’s some crazy business huh?

Yeah I heard about Wagner! 12 years working in this business & that man never gave my nutsack a good review! I polish my nut sack every night!

I'm going to confuse everybody at work and ask for it helically arranged fastener

Got me at, “both of those seem vulgar”

Lol the one for screw and nail were the best.

A British Jane Hathaway for us older redditors

DUDE THIS IS SO FUNNY WHO IS SHE

I was really hoping he'd say the last one was non-helicaly arranged fastener

This isnt even cringe this is funny

He's so robotic.

I was scrolling through a completely different subreddit and got really confused lmao

This is the kind of post this sub is supposed to make fun of. What happened?

She is right cause that is the definition of the image

Hahahaha

The owner of r/increasinglyverbose

Hey it could've been an apple pastry too

She may need to get her gelatinous orbs checked out…

Found her, and I love all her stuff. https://www.tiktok.com/@iamtherubric

Who is the target audience for the original

This is me when I have a dissertation and the word count needs beefing up.

Mary Poppins

She's getting her English and German mixed up.

Apple pie 🤤

She speaks in definitions only

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

I got it, she sounds like Trisha Takanawa from Family Guy and i love the accent

Whi is she

r/technicallythetruth

How does she know it’s peach

She said umbrella wrong it should be a mobile water repellent canopy

She copied this word for word from another guy who did it

She's well funny

Bird leaf

It was the dextral side which was absolutely, positively fallacious. ( I had to search up those words.)

I though she was speaking german

Bro just made it complicated

She recorded that in 1865...

Shit sounds like pikmin 2 treasure names

r/cringetiktoks

I like her speech impediment

Old fashioned mid Atlantic accent 😍😍😍😍

I love her

"both of those Seem vulgar"

I love her accent ahhhh